View Full Version : If Questions Could Grant Instant Enlightenment...
Nexus
03-15-2002, 12:48 AM
Perhaps these questions would be the ones to do so:
Why is it that when a person tells you there's over a million stars in the universe you believe them, but if someone tells you there's wet paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?
Why is it you get a penny for your thoughts, but have to put in your two cents worth?
Why is the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star the same tune?
Why does Donald Duck wear a towel when he comes out of the shower, when he doesn't usually wear any pants?
If you take an oriental person and spin him around a few times, does he become disoriented? (Extreme pun beware!)
If you dig a tunnel straight through the earth, will you come out with your feet first?
If you try to fail and suceed, what did you just do?
Why is an elevator still called an elevator even when its going down?
Why do people never say "it's only a game" when they're winning?
- Nexus
old jong
03-15-2002, 06:28 AM
Why when you want to say something to somebody at a certain distance,you move your lips but there is no sound?...
Why when those daytime actors frenchkiss right after waking up it taste like fresh mint?...
Why bird poop on a white car is black...and white on a black car?...
If I suffer from athlete foot, will I run faster?...
Why soap said to wash "even whiter" can wash a black shirt?...
If you ask the taxi driver to take you to destination on the reverse....Will he owe you money?...
If you hang a little mirror to a spruce tree...Will the tree smell like a car?...
If I sleep and I dream that I sleep...Do I have to wake up two times?...
If babies here eat with little spoons...Do chinese babies eat with toothpicks?...
Is it safe to have cosmetical surgery when the doctor has Picasso's painting on his walls?...
If we are on earth to help others...Why are the others on earth?...
Nostalgia is not what it was before!...
Why don't they make cat food with mouse flavor?...
Americans throw rice at weddings...Do chineses throw hamburgers?...
If olive oil comes from olives...what about baby oil?...
Questions...Questions!....
old jong
03-15-2002, 07:17 AM
When two mute persons want to share secrets...Do they have to wear mitts?...:confused:
guohuen
03-15-2002, 07:33 AM
Why is just about every Sting song plagerized from the patty cake song?
old jong
03-15-2002, 08:33 AM
What ever happened to "Preparations" A to G ?...:confused:
Why you can't shoot tourists with your shotguns during tourist season?...
:confused:
old jong
03-15-2002, 08:38 AM
It is impossible to lick your own elbow!...:eek: Try it!
Justa Man
03-15-2002, 11:19 AM
d@mn, i can't reach it!!
PHILBERT
03-15-2002, 11:58 AM
Crap! Off by one inch!
txwingchun
03-15-2002, 12:03 PM
Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway?
Justa Man
03-15-2002, 12:10 PM
why does your mom have a wooden leg with a kickstand?
Badger
03-15-2002, 12:43 PM
Since it was a three hour tour did the Skipper get paid for overtime?
Why did they pack so much crap for a three hour tour??
How did Batman & Robin's clothes change when they went down the Batpoles??
What happens if they went down the wrong pole??
Why does the villans always put them in a giant coffee cup or snowcone instead of just shooting them???
Why do all the badguys on James Bond movies feed him,bath him,give him a girl to sleep with & then try to kill him???
Badger
bamboo_ leaf
03-15-2002, 01:15 PM
Why are hemorrhoids not called asstrhoids?
I don't believe it! I really can't reach my own elbow! :(
Simply amazing.
Why do hot dogs come in a packet of 8 and hot dug buns come in a packet of 12?
Ryu
Justa Man
03-15-2002, 01:22 PM
why is your mom so fat that the back of her neck looks like a pack of hot dogs?
Badger
03-15-2002, 01:24 PM
I bet Gene Simmons can.:D
Badger
Badger
03-15-2002, 01:29 PM
What do you do when youre stranded & dont have a roll???
Badger
red5angel
03-15-2002, 01:41 PM
I am standing 12 feet from a woman who can actually touch her own elbow with her tongue! Yes gentleman, and I must be in hell because I am already married!!!!!!!
PHILBERT
03-15-2002, 02:23 PM
I bet John Holmes could lick his own elbow. :eek:
JWTAYLOR
03-15-2002, 03:42 PM
If I lay my arm on the table I can do it.
When you stand up, where does your lap go?
JWT
respectmankind
03-15-2002, 07:05 PM
if a man can walk on the moon, why does it hurt when i hit my balls with a chain to laugh at my pain and stupidity? booya! i just made the stupidest question period.
Leonidas
03-16-2002, 08:49 AM
Why do Skydivers wear helmets.
Why do people complain about air pollution yet they smoke a pack a day.
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