What the Frig!

[Black Jack]

This is to good of a find, I almost did not want to share this one, as I am really trying to stop flaming those who I have not met, but I could not resist, I love sharing the mirth.

Here are two sites, for real sites, that claim they teach the ancient system of Kuta Hand, the art used to protect the Pharaohs of Egypt, of the old kingdom, used by their elite bodyguards and hidden through time.

Even better, for $129.00 you can be ranked in Hikuta/Kuta Hand via a video learning course!!!!!!!!

Bahahahahahahahahah!!!!

http://www.hikuta.com

http://hikutacombatsystems.com

[old jong]

Jack Savage!!!!!!! (http://hikutacombatsystems.com/jak1.jpg)


OH! OH!....Looks more Greek than ancien Egyptian to me! (http://hikutacombatsystems.com/pank2.jpg) :rolleyes:



Watchman should see this! (http://hikutacombatsystems.com/jacSn1.jpg) ;)

[red5angel]

Actually BJ, now that you have publicized "our" secret you will have to be terminated :mad:
Please wait at your house and dont make us break a sweat trying to find you, our kuta will only allow us to drag out your death longer.

[red5angel]

Black Jack, you will join the Egyptologist who have provided this man with his information........

[red5angel]

One of the Egyptologists said that Kuta was actually an art called, 'Kuta Khali Yali Wallic bunkhard', which meant, 'Kuta will come for you and your donkeys.' He also said that Kuta was a beast that lived inside of every man who dared to cross his path or who even dares to write about him.

:eek:

[ewallace]

For an extra $29.99 a representitave will personally come to your house and wrap your ass up with toilet paper and declare you an official Egyptian mummy. Offer good while supplies last.

[Ryu]

From the site...
"In no particular order I've trained extensively in: Tai-jitsu (Ninjitsu), Karate, Jujitsu (Japanese),Kung Fu,Brazilian Jujitsu,Catch Wrestling, boxing and military/police hand to hand and CQB (close quarter battle)tactics."


I suppose you can call it whatever you want. But no one seems to be able to do much without cross-training these days :D

Some of his strikes on the site looked like Ninjutsu (taijutsu)

Ryu

[PHILBERT]

Those 2 look like they are making love, not fighting.

[red5angel]

And if your female you MUST provide a male partner! Awesome marketing!

[Budokan]

'Kuta will come for you and your donkeys."

And to think I could have gone my entire fuggin' life without hearing that phrase....:rolleyes:

[jon]

Do you think they have a solid linage?

I might try and reinvent the local indiginous combat systems of beating people about the head and body with a very large stick...

Anyone interested in caveman combat? I can teach you how to wallow in your own filth(incase you dont already know) and how to grunt loudly whilst wielding a home made club.
Not only this but i can also teach you how to stab and animal with a stick, skin it and wear it like a trophy. Infact we dont have belts we have skins...
There is no forms and no set techniques so application of the art is all about unfocussed brutality.
This art has been around since the dawn of time and is now a rare gem only known to a few including myself.
I am willing to reveal all secrets for only your life savings and first born child, plus the first crack at your wife on your wedding night.



PS god darn i love your posts Budokan, can you please post more often?

[Black Jack]

Not to start a bad swing to this topic but IMHO this "type" of same ultra ancient claim is made by many in the chinese arts, I see no difference in what he is doing and what they are doing, if yours can be considered valid, and even among cma players that kind of agreement is rare, why is his system, which we know nothing about, bs.

Not direct statements, just thoughts to mull over, think about it.

[David Jamieson]

The chinese have bragging rights on longest continuous civilization still existing.

The "Ancient Egyptians" are long gone.

peace

[Black Jack]

Just for debate, I don't think thats true, where did you get that info? What proof on this civilaztions run-length and where is the solid proof of a set in stone timeline for a codified martial tradition?

[Budokan]

Is that caveman fu part of the Neanderthal style or the Cro-Magnon style? Anyway, doesn't the bow-legged hominid style have them both beat in lineage and ability to squat over a dirt trench and pinch out a loaf so you'll scare the sabre tooth tigers away...?

[David Jamieson]

Shang (c. 1750 - c. 1040 BC)

Shang Dynasty is the second dynasty.
The first only has an archeaological record and not much written, however, it constitutes the begininning of a continuous to present civilization.

So in context to the second dynasty, the chinese martial arts epitomies as they are now aren't "stretching" it in the least.
The chinese dynasties can be followed right up to the struggles which led to the communist rule of today. Unbroken.

The egyptian old and new dynastic civilizations ended with the romans when the romans ended it was broken down further and finally the crusades where were you start to see the re-emirgance of a common civilization in Egypt.

And the Canada debate table takes a sip of water... :D

peace

[Shooter]

And the Canada debate table takes a sip of water...

LOL! :p

[Black Jack]

Not to be boink but I am still not buying it, I am not doubting if anceint china had martial arts or not, every ancient culture has native combative systems, but where is a codified source, scroll, ancient lineage chart, a historical accuracy, that showcases a unbroken art from the Shang dynasty????

Apart from an eyewitness record of Bodhidarma, a very enigmatic figure to say the very least, written by Yang Hsuan-chih in AD 547, no other contemporary references exist, even in the Shaolin monks writtings.

From what I have heard is that only some 500 years later do lengthy texts on Bodhidarma emerge, maybe thats due to how chan buddhism sees the preservation of scriptural accounts, who knows, maybe anti-textual. :D

Concerning Bodhidarma's "legacy" to the martial arts, something again which cma scholars have problems with, there is even greater uncertainty, the sophisticated development of unarmed combat skills in the Far East after Bodhidharma's time means that his direct influence, if any, on actual technique and style, martial techniques from India anyway, is almost entirely lost.

Besides that point, then you always have the question, does old mean good, by that I mean in today's modern times.

My rant.:rolleyes: