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yik-wah-tik
04-25-2002, 02:58 PM
ok this is a story i have been holding back for years.

this is the first time this story have ever been repeated by my lips.

i will make this story as short as possible.

LONG DONG JEONG QI GONG
a story long forgotten
author unknown

............jeong yim had learned all he could from the legendary green grass monk. the monk prepared a final meal for jeong yim before he left. once the goodbye's were said, jeong yim turned to leave. about half way thru the door the green grass monk called out to jeong yim "wait, i have one las thing to give you before you go."

jeong yim was a little bewildered since he thought he learned everything from ching cho. ching cho disappeared for a second then returned with something in his hands that was wrapped up.
jeong yim wondered what this was?!

ching cho sat jeong yim down and told him that he had never tought another soul this technique since he was afraid of the reprecussions it could inspire. but ching cho felt jeong yim worth passing on this ancient form. in fact what was in ching cho's hands was an old scroll.

ching cho sat jeong yim down and cautioned him of the severity of using this technique. jeong yim impatiently asked what this was.

ching cho said i have created a special section in this form especially and soley for you. this form was the most sought after form amongst many old chinese gung fu masters. once this form was mastered, jeong yim would be able to accomplish many great feats.

this ancient form was a specialized qi gong form. once mastered, this qi qong form would enhance sexual activity, as well as enlargen your *****.

jeong yim as ecstatic. he accepted this final gift from ching cho.

not only was jeong yim known for his unbeatable fighting prowess, he also became a local legend amongst the women in southern china. because the special gi qong form made his ***** 15 inches, and had the stamina and strength of a tiger raising its head (literally)!

jeong yim was cautious with whom he passed this qi gong form on to. but chose yuen hai to continue this form. he passed it on to prof. lau bun, he passed it on to jew leong, jew tien loong and then to me. i now possess this special qi-gong form and i have become the next master of this technique.

this very secret and special qi gong form was named

"Long Dong Jeong Qi Gong"

i will be passing that on to my first student to perform the tea ceremony.

thanks:confused:

Fu-Pow
04-25-2002, 03:30 PM
If ever there was a time for a moderator......:rolleyes:

yik-wah-tik
04-25-2002, 07:16 PM
what? did i say something wrong? you don't believe that story?
it was passed down from a friend of my uncles 3rd cousins friend who was a student of a karate teacher who once studied under his god father who learned from a guy who learned monk ching cho's cousin.

what's wrong:rolleyes: don't you believe me? it's true! i have also learned this ancient form.

long live long dong jeong qi gong!!!!!!!!!;)

americandesi75
04-25-2002, 07:38 PM
yik-wah-tik,
I have to take issue with you. I have heard that recent documents found from the chan family manuscripts said that he was only able to raise to 11.3 inches. But the Buk sing world claimed it actually made him shrivel up and impotent!!

Now, listen, you! you better come up with documented evidence in english prior to 1983 that confirms your 15 inches, otherwise the Lacey's will rule the ****ing universe!!!! :eek:

yik-wah-tik
04-25-2002, 08:07 PM
hey you! don't you come at me with threats. i was about to attach these documents that were written in monk ching cho's
own handwritting, but my cat ****ed on my scanner and when i jumped up to kwa choy my cat i tipped over my vcr which caught on fire and burned all my documents. but hey, if jeong yim said he was 15 inches then i **** well better believe he was 15 inches.

i think the chan family altered the documents that claimed he was 11.3 inches. but you didn't hear that from me. shhhhhhhhhhhh!

i have no comments on the bak sing branch. no comments. pls get that camera out ma face!!!!!


:confused: :confused: :confused:

extrajoseph
04-25-2002, 11:59 PM
I believe you and I am sending you 3 virgins and a camara team, lets have some fun and see what you can do your 15-er. We can do yum cha afterward if you are UP to it.

What, you don't want to. What about 3 young boys fresh from Fuksan and no camara team? Are you bendable today?

No, you are not bendable today. OK. What about 3 chickens and one goat?

No, you are not an animal. OK. What about a pair of hands belonging to the "General"?

You like that.

OK, one pair of General hands coming up.

Would you like them holding the Chan Family manuscript not not?

No? Just do it with some Bak Sing jelly?

OK, with some Bak Sing jelly. Farce or slow?

Farce, you like it farce.

OK, a farce General with Bak Sing coming up.

What? You like to make the sound "yik-wah-tik".

Oh, that's nice Frank!

You have a nice day, my friend.

The laugh is on me.

kei lun
04-26-2002, 08:16 AM
Your all freaks!

extrajoseph
04-26-2002, 09:11 AM
We are not freaks, we are just boys having some fun!

"Laugh and the world laughs with you."

yik-wah-tik
04-26-2002, 02:21 PM
ok then. i will be waiting for the virgins. but which branch are they from? i want to make sure that the information they spread about my secret weapon is accurate. i don't want the later generations going thru what we went thru here!!!!!

i love virgins!!!!!!!! yay for virgins!!!!!!! those **** virgins always stealing my **** chi. thats why i mastered the long dong jeong qi gong form. i have to be careful whom i pass this on too. maybe my son, so we can keep it in the family. and have family style long dong jeong qi gong. no **** variations, no copy cats, or false documents!!!!!!!!!!!!

i will let you know about how it goes with me and them lovely virgins!!!!!!!!!!!

frankie long dong mccarthy
i think if i was chinese i would be call so **** hung! or if i was korean i would be called hung so low!

if i was russian my name would be frankie sfukinof***ain!

but i never told you my italian name......

dumas biatcha! (dumb ass *****)

frank

Serpent
04-28-2002, 11:46 PM
Well, this does have about as much basis in verifiable fact as anything else Frank McCarthy has ever posted on this forum.

;)

yik-wah-tik
05-01-2002, 09:19 PM
if you would like i would like to teach you a secret technique from the long dong jeong qi gong form that was passed down from monk ching cho. it is called the serpent comes out of the cave to play.

i think that is right up your alley..............

pls consider this........it would be good for your personal life.

frank

Serpent
05-01-2002, 09:28 PM
Tell you what, Frank. You keep your serpent in its cave and I'll do the same. No point in scaring all the other poor, innocent posters on the forum.

:)

yik-wah-tik
05-01-2002, 09:44 PM
ok it's up to you. it's a good technique tho. you would be better off for it.

frank