This may top them all

[norther practitioner]

Are you kidding?
check this out, its on ebay

http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=1732812471

[norther practitioner]

come on, no comments about an online mentor selling his multiple lifetimes of expertise on ebay!

[KC Elbows]

Weird. It was forbidden by rating check at my work, and I can normally get on ebay.

[norther practitioner]

lol, I think it should be banned on ebay.

[IronFist]

"Location astral plane "

I think it's one of Ashida's spies!!!!

IronFist

[BigCountry]

I think its a trick. You can't just buy your way into the astral plane, it just doesn't seem fair.

[wushu chik]

"i hope to provide you with missing pieces of the puzzle. I will answer three questions or comment on three subjects by e-mail for the lesson here offered. any subject related to kung fu, combat, chi, healing, meditation, etc. I offer the accumulated experience of many lifetimes. "

Does anyone have an ebay account? If so, why don't you email this person and ask for where he get's his information from?

~Wen~

[norther practitioner]

will do

[wushu chik]

Anything? Anything?

Buehler?? Buehler?? Buehler?? Buehl........

Got an email back yet?

~Wen~

[Gabriel]

my charlatan meter is spiking. Gee yeah ill pay 27 bucks teach me the good stuff.. %$&^%#*#^%&

[Nick Monticello]

Is he selling that giant urn at the bottom of the page? or the right to ask 3 questions by E-mail?

[Chang Style Novice]

Do you know kung fu?

Yes.

Really?

Yes.

REALLY?

Yes. Thank you, come again.

:D

Also, who knew that the Astral Plane is in Chicago? I wonder which neighborhood.

edit -

I went and checked his other auctions. That sure looks like a nice Tiffany lamp. And he gets 14 out of 14 positive feedbacks. None of them seem to be about kungfu, meditation, etc. though. Or maybe "Love the rug" has some kind of mysterious martial application I don't understand.

[red5angel]

I'd pay that guy twice as much if he would let me kick his azz!!!!

[HopGar]

thats just stupid. Reminds me of our good friend Bob Klein.:D :D

[norther practitioner]

No reply yet. :(
Almost worth the money for the entertainment aspect.

[GeneChing]

...it's you, isnt' it? don't they know they can get all the answers here for free? :p

[Tsuei]

I have now seen everything.... I may die a peacful man.

[norther practitioner]

Dam, Gene, you are one smart man, how did you know. Was it all the knowledge I lay down here on the forums. My multiple lifes added up, I still don't think I would have the audacity to try to sell my expertise in that way. How desperate a person this may be is a comment that i got from a friend. What was that post about a virtual sifu?

[African Tiger]

This definitely ranks among the top 1000 reasons why the internet should be stopped...

Or at least that turd should have a gerbil stuffed in his ass, and dropped off at Richard Gere's place.

[IronFist]

Originally posted by Chang Style Novice
Or maybe "Love the rug" has some kind of mysterious martial application I don't understand.

lol, that's about the funniest thing I've read all day :D

IronFist

[SifuAbel]

I have an ebay account. these were my three questions.

"here are my three questions:

Are you kidding?

Who let you out of the straight jacket?

What self respecting teacher puts himself on ebay?"

[scotty1]

LOL @ Abel's questions, I wonder if you'l get a response, or die from a long distance Chi-Blast!:)

[Kristoffer]

wath a waste of time..

[norther practitioner]

Hello, my knowledge comes from training in traditional kung fu. i first
learned shaolin, then hsing-i and pa kua, then tai chi. along the way i
studied many other arts and styles too numerous to list. use of chi is
taught through these arts i have mentioned. as far as listing ranks and
lineage, i am here to help you along and not to provide you a lengthy
resume'. there is no substitute for real dojo training. this offering
is
meant to be extra curricular for you. thanks, Roy

>From: gski_99@yahoo.com
>To: mahajaran@hotmail.com
>Subject: Question for seller -- Item #1732812471
>Date: Tue, 21 May 2002 09:33:42 PDT
>
>Where do you get your knowledge. Do you hold rank in any lineage?
What
>war arts do you know, have studied. Where did you learn to use your
chi?

[wushu chik]

That's great NP! Not only will this guy NOT give you his "resume'", he's totally avoiding your questions. Anyone besides me think this has something to do with "Da Shifu" or Sin The'?? HA HA HA!!

~Wen~

[GeneChing]

.. he has the last laugh. Wish I thought of it :rolleyes:

[David Jamieson]

Apparently L Ron Hubbard is not dead.

hahaha.

Gee, I'll answer questions for free! FREE!
Not that I know anything, nor do I really care if I had past lives or if I'll have new ones in the future, but...

peace

[Mokujin]

I couldn't believe the load of bull this guy was shoveling in his auction, so I emailed him. Below is my email followed by his response. Note my comments are in .

[B]My Email:
Online mentor! Oh- that's good! Only 27 dollars! And a flaky description. Oh, can I pay 40 bucks?! 50 dollars?! What the heck kind of scam are you playing?

[maybe a little harsh, but I couldn't help it]

His Response:
Dear MOKUJIN [I changed the original name to protect the guilty],
There is no scam here. Any one who asked was given my 30 year history in traditional shaolin, hsing-i, pa kua, and tai chi. I told myself if i had one negative response i would withdraw the offer so that's what i have done. The money is nothing but a token of sincerity. I hope you have not deprived some little brother of learning how to circulate breath during meditation or how to get more power in their techniques.This was just a little experiment
in seeing who would respond. You have an anger issue ( the punisher? [my eBay name]) that may be keeping you from recieving positive energy.

Huh? Anger issues? :mad: For five extra bucks he'll be your psychiatrist, too! :D

Peace!
Mokujin

[The Willow Sword]

HEy now this could be the REAL thing. :rolleyes:

[Qi dup]

hahaha, that some funny stuff right there

[KungFuGuy!]

That's pretty funny, but it's not up there with that auction where the guy was offering to come to your house and kick your ass, as long as you'd pay the transportation fees. The funniest part was it got about 10 bids :D

[SifuAbel]

I just got my relply for this joker.

"Hi, answers: no i was not kidding except the astral plane part was meant to be humorous. - never was in a straight jacket - i am not concerned with SELF respecting, just trying to reach out and help a student on a one to one. If someone makes an instructional video tape he does not get this kind of chastisement, why is one on one so wrong? Ebay is where I spend my time and they have a category where people seek instruction. I have no bad intent for anyone. Perhaps you could also ask what kind of teacher charges for lessons in a dojo. People do not always value that which is given for free. - sorry to have ruffled your feathers. Are you a real sifu ?"

What kills me here is that to charge $30.00 to ask three questions is the equivalent of chargeing $300.00 for a private lesson. Its a scam.

[Stacey]

If they think its worth it them who cares?

Besides, your just ****ed because you didn't think of it first.

[Okami]

Hey guys,

Even "real" kung fu masters gotta eat.
I wonder how many groceries he can buy with his profits?

This sounds to me like Miss Cleo's phone line is not bringing in enough funds so she is expanding to online auctions.

Did anybody email this fruitcake and invite him to participate in these forums? I personally would like to see what he has to say.

On the other hand, maybe not.