What would/did you name your school?

[KC Elbows]

What would you name a school you opened? Y'know, like "Cleapatra Jone's school of Hapkido" or what have you.

Or, if you made a style, what would you call it?

[Merryprankster]

Donkey Style.

Complete with the dreaded:

Donkey Snuff technique and the dreaded Donkey Punch.

[Wu-Xing]

Being from ireland , mine would be " Lepre chuan " :)

[Black Jack]

I would never have a school but I have thought about getting some t-shirts made for some close training buds of mine who just get together and hack it out.

"American Gutterfighting Academy"

[Shadow Dragon]

School = No specific name.

None, of the schools I have trained so far had names, but than most used rented spaces and didn't have their own premises.
But than they also hardly ever advertised, most just had a notice at the entrance no yellow pages, no internet, no promotions.

Style = Doubt if I would do that.
If I teach it would be a style where I have been granted teacher status.
Peace.

[LEGEND]

WORLDCOM Martial Arts! HAHAHA!!!

[David Jamieson]

" The stay awake, be alert, don't lean on the walls, keep your nails trimmed, don't touch that without asking, take your watch off, tuck your shirt in, clean your face, be good to your parents, turn the lights off when you're not in the room, to much tv will make you stupid, hit em hard, get it done, listen instead of blabbing, watch instead of daydreaming, do instead of wasting your time, school"

whadda ya think? too long? :D

peace

[No_Know]

The school would not have a name. The students would learn their lessons and know where to come. They'll like what they learn. That's enough~

If I had a style type thing...It couldn't be presented as a Kung-Fu because it doesn't come from the lineage Kung-Fus to be respected do. But as to the point, I might call it, Ernie Moore Jr.'s Kung-Fu, Squirrel.

[Xebsball]

"WORLDCOM Martial Arts! HAHAHA!!!"

LOL :D

[guohuen]

Lepre chuan

LOL:D

[Royal Dragon]

Qin Lung Quan = Royal Dragon Fist

[KungFuGuy!]

I'd call it The Slaughter House, and my slogan would be "The sawed off shotgun of martial arts".
:D

[LEGEND]

"KILL AND KILL AGAIN SCHOOL OF MARTIAL ARTS"
"VIETCONG MARTIAL ARTS ACADEMY"
"YO MAMA SCHOOL OF FIGHTING"

[old jong]

Green with red head blue tail covered with grey slime dragon kung fu do school inc.:eek:

[neito]

triplet dragon gym, or maybe quadruplet dragon. better than double dragon

[joedoe]

Joe's school of Jedi Arts, run by Joe Doe - a graduate of the Enron school of financial management.

[Serpent]

My favourite so far:


Originally posted by KungFuGuy!
I'd call it The Slaughter House, and my slogan would be "The sawed off shotgun of martial arts".
:D

Classic!

What about "We Could Tell You But Then We'd Have To Kill You Fu"?

[SevenStar]

pimp fist school of traditional martial arts

signature techniques (these take hard, dedicated training to master)

strikes and kicks:
hundred hand b!tch slap
slap a ho elbow
buddha smoking palm

chin na
ho drops off money
fool recognizes
pimp ducks from gunfire

learn all this and more! you too can learn what fighting is really all about.

"pimp fist, slappin em silly"

[Helicopter]

Lame Hamster kung fu.

Learn how to cry - with astonishing results

Testimonies.

Alan "..mother's with small children ran to my aid."

Peter "...he just seemed too embarrassed to hit me.."


Free with course: "Acme instant-incontinence" water bladder.

[dezhen2001]

I would only teach if my Sifu and Sigong qualifies me to teach (a LONG way off :D). Then it would be under my Sigongs school: Tse Qigong Centre.

Some of those sound pretty cool though: can i join the Pimpin' school? :D Oh - i already graduated form there :D

david

[Chang Style Novice]

I don't know monkey style, but if I did, I'd open the Mojo Jojo Dojo. Then I'd get sued by Craig McCracken and Cartoon Network.

[KC Elbows]

Kung Lek,

Translate that to chinese, and I think you may have a winner.

You guys are cracking me up.:D

[Helicopter]

Aw man where can I sign up!:D :D

[Bolt]

SevenStar - .... LMAO !

[gazza99]

...let the posts continue...

[LEGEND]

HONG KONG PHOOEY!!!

Here's a good quote...if your opponent attempt to provoke you...

"...man...u come straight out of a COMIC BOOK!!!"

[gazza99]

stop interupting me..

[Shadow Dragon]

Been thinking.

I think I will open a school to train contestants for "Naki-Sumo" (Crying Sumo).

Problem is that contenders only got a very limited time span to compete in. :(

But what the heck bring thoes tods and I will have them in shape for competition soon.

Peace.

[gazza99]

?

[KC Elbows]

Gaza apparently has the Riddler school of martial arts.

[SevenStar]

holy question marks batman....I think you're right!

[Lice]

Originally posted by Chang Style Novice
I don't know monkey style, but if I did, I'd open the Mojo Jojo Dojo. Then I'd get sued by Craig McCracken and Cartoon Network.

LOL




I can't help it, I'm a Powerpuff Girls fan. At least I have children to use as an excuse to see the movie. :)

[Ryu]

:mad: I have no damm idea....


Sekkendo?

Street Judo? :D

MMA?

JKD newaza?


Ryu

[Gabriel]

Hmmm... what would really draw the students...

Demi-God Martial Arts!

Wong's Magnificent Bug Fu!

The Flipping around and Hitting stuff Academy!

The Shotokan Shaolin Wudang Tae Kwon Do Jute Keen Do Kali Sanda Krav Magna Wing Chun Tai Chi Chuan Qi Gong Jiu Jutsu boxing five animal academy and temple of kung fu and philosophy!

Otherwise known as
TSSWTKDJKDKSKMWCTCCQGJJBFAAATOKFAP!

The Qi Center :D

American Center for Chinese Fighting Concepts

Chinese Center for American Fighting Concepts

Bum Fu

Kung Mart

Fu Mart

Goddess Kung Fu Center (I would get all the chicks)

Mad Hatters Internment Camp of Physical Perfection

Sacred Lackeys Under Demonic Gabriel Esq
or SLUDGE

And my favorite

The Martial Way! (although Im sure thats taken)

Gabriel

[Unstoppable]

HAppy Monkey BUM FU !!!??? LOL

[Royal Dragon]

It's an ancient school, with it's roots as old as coined money$$

[SevenStar]

totally sweet ninja (which are mammals, by the way) school of totally flipping out and cutting off heads

[IronFist]

LOL SevenStar.

You may have some competition from me, however, as I have opened a few schools of my own, including:

The Ultimate Paradox Ninja Academy: How to not give a crap, but also be very careful and precise.

Ninja Killing Academy: How to be a mammal.

School of how to almost kick your mom right in the face. (aka Ninja School of flipping out)

The Anti-Pirate Ninja School

Fighting With the World's Second Biggest Boner (at one point his website just got sick)

Ninja Academy. Secret Technique: Killing an entire town when a resident is eating at a diner and drops a fork.

Ninja Academy. Learn how to totally uppercut some kid just because he opened a window.

How to spend most of your time flying, but sometimes stabbing.

We also have astral spy training.

IronFist

[SevenStar]

My school is goung to teach astral spying also!! In addition, there will be various educational courses, like

mammals (can be) people too

how to have hot ninja sex

how to cook like a ninja (http://www.ninjaburger.com/)

How to cut down walls

the sweetest head chopping techniques

developing you stamina so that you can fight all the time

how to be either mean or totally awesome



We even have classes for those that do not wish to be ninjas:

how to love ninjas with all of your body (including your pee pee)

how to avoid crapping your pants just because ninjas are soooooooo totally sweet

[IronFist]

Originally posted by SevenStar
We even have classes for those that do not wish to be ninjas:

how to love ninjas with all of your body (including your pee pee)

how to avoid crapping your pants just because ninjas are soooooooo totally sweet

Normally I would have thought I had lost, at this point, were it not for my super secret schools that I didn't mention in the first post.

Including:

Ninja school of killing without even thinking twice about it.

For Ninjas (or regular people) who don't wish to live anymore:

The Ninja School of Committing Seppuku with a Frisbee (http://www.realultimatepower.net/seppuku.htm)


CHECK IT OUT THERE'S A NEW NINJA GHOST STORY THERE!!! (http://www.realultimatepower.net/scarystory3.htm)

IronFist

[SevenStar]

I figured you had something up your sleeve. I admit, that was sweet, but my super secret techniques are beyond awesome:

use your ninja skills to get acting roles (http://www.tinyninjatheater.com/)

how to have an online store so secret and soooo sweet that you can only see the merchandise if you are a ninja (http://pyim2.keenspace.com/store.html)

how to rock hard (everyone knows that ninjas rock hard)

here is a sample of the sweetness that's obtainable at my school

techniques (http://pratt.edu/~alexrich/ninjas/index2.html)

[Chang Style Novice]

Ninjas are totally sweet, of course, but they are powerless before my Evil Genius Cartoon Monkey Kungfu!

[chingei]

Ai Ki Kyu Academy

[SevenStar]

I almost forgot:

the super ninja information hub (http://pub7.ezboard.com/ftheofficialninjaforumfrm1)

My school will teach you how to use this invaluable research

[IronFist]

SevenStar, I only have one ninja school left, but it's so super secret and super awesome that I would have to kill you if I told you about it. Oh yeah, you would also get so pumped that you would DEFINATELY kick your mom in the face if you saw it.

Well, I guess I can show you.

Ultimate, most superior ass kicking ninja school ever. "Real Ultimate Power" doesn't even begin to describe the awesome power of the techniques contained within. (http://www.ashidakim.com)

Bow before my might.

IronFist

[IronFist]

See, you're speechless at the power of my new school.

IronFist

[Serpent]

Astral Spies got him.

Or is that Anal Spies?

[ewallace]

Richard Pipelayer's Bludgeoning Temple and Western Love Shack

"where the women play and the pussies won't stay"

[dezhen2001]

NICE name ewallace :D
Need any advertising/design work done for your school? I'm currently an un-employed (almost) graduated design student... would be a fun project to do a commercial for :D

david

[ewallace]

I just hope I don't ever have to use the "doctor clamps cervix" technique.

[SevenStar]

I met one of your students, Iron. he told me he was an astral spy, so I immediately flipped out and cut his head off.

[Colin]

If I was ever skilled enough to start my own style, i'd want to call it something really cool like "LionsClawKungFu"
and make up a really exciting story about how I have learnt loads of styles of kung fu, and done masses of secret research into the mysteries of Tibetan Lions roar.

I'd then declare myself as the founder (sijo) of this New and Devastating Style of Kung Fu, dress up in shiny purple silk monk rodes, create a website to promote my newly invented style, then gain affiliation to a recognised association so as to legtimise my devastating new style of kung fu that is Lions Claw Kung Fu!!!!!!!!

Oh bolloks! someones done it already!
http://www.lionsclawkungfu.co.uk

Colin.............

[NafAnal]

I would name my school:

Honest Bob's Dojo

[Former castleva]

"bad-ass martial arts and ass kicking-no nonsense"
:p :p :p

[The Willow Sword]

DR. WANG HUNG LO'S SCHOOL OF "TAKEYO-DO":cool: :cool: :cool: :cool: :cool:

[norther practitioner]

to the pimp....anyone seen how high????
where's my baby powder.

[ewallace]

Southern US Longfootintheass is the main style taught at Enrique Wallacio's Institute of Self Offense.

We also offer $50 (US Dollars) for persons willing to let us test our techniques on them. So when your plasma and blood supply run low and you need that next fix, you have another option to make quick $$.

[The Willow Sword]

stumble fist,,,thats how he died huh. that dumb drunken ancient asian :p :rolleyes:

Many respects to all the dumb drunken ancient asians out there,,,,,,,,,The Willow Sword

[MonkeySlap Too]

Sevenstar said:
I met one of your students, Iron. he told me he was an astral spy, so I immediately flipped out and cut his head off.

Reply: Dude, will you stop sending me the heads of astral spies? It's like your cat bringing you dead squirrels as a 'gift'. I told you nekkid girls, my man. Those heads get stinky, and I've filled a closet already...

[SevenStar]

so next time you want the head of a nekkid girl?

[Serpent]

Nekkid girls get stinky too, eventually...

[MonkeySlap Too]

Serpent, you are suppossed to wash them.

And no, man - Live girls. Look at the flashing neon sign outside your 'office'.:p

[SevenStar]

ah, I shoulda said "head from", not "head of", eh? :D :D

disclaimer: I'm only going with the flow here...Wen and Beth, Don't kill me, Please!!

[ewallace]

You might want to clairfy "nekkid" as necked too.

[Water Dragon]

Originally posted by SevenStar
so next time you want the head of a nekkid girl?

I think he meant he wants head FROM a nekkid girl.

[ewallace]

When talking about head from a girl I would not want any misconception about it being from a kid. Even if it's a nek kid. Get it?

[Sho]

I'd call it the Art of Fighting Without Fighting! :D

[MonkeySlap Too]

You wouldn't want head from a goat? I thought you lived in Texas.

(My apologies to all Texans other than e-wallace, his line was so sick, it couldn't go unpunished, and the rest of you are unfortunate collateral damage.)

[ewallace]

I really wasn't trying to be funny or sick. It was a genuine error that I felt I should point out while sevenstar was editing his post.

Now as for the actual question "You wouldn't want head from a goat?" The answer would be no. I've had donkey while across the border in mexico and really do prefer it over goat. It really was a great piece of ass.