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eulerfan
01-08-2003, 01:04 PM
If I were Lysistrata, we wouldn't be at war right now.

MightyB
01-08-2003, 02:36 PM
I think that this thread needs a safety word.



I say the freakier the better. Dudes and dudets, it's all about the fun. Heck, I want parrallel bars and padded walls when I go to tuna town.

red5angel
01-08-2003, 02:45 PM
**** MightyB, I should introduce you to my ex swedish girlfriend. I could tell you stories about what this chick was into that would turn your hair grey and make your mom cry. She scared me, I can't even say Swede without cringing......

MightyB
01-08-2003, 02:50 PM
Tell her to bring the butter Red5.

red5angel
01-08-2003, 02:58 PM
how about I just set you up with her and watch the screaming begin! You like petite busty blondes with a lot of bizarre fetishes and no inhibitions?

@PLUGO
01-08-2003, 03:45 PM
You like petite busty blondes with a lot of bizarre fetishes and no inhibitions?

only if she's waring a got qi (http://store.yahoo.com/martialartsmart/tshirgotqi99.html) T-shirt!!!

An jie
01-08-2003, 04:15 PM
Ah! They have qi indeed, but is it positive qi? On has to wonder

Serpent
01-08-2003, 04:19 PM
Originally posted by red5angel
how about I just set you up with her and watch the screaming begin! You like petite busty blondes with a lot of bizarre fetishes and no inhibitions?

D@mn boy, who doesn't!?

I'm going to touch on a very iffy subject here, so if people (Gene) think it needs collaring, then just say the word...

OK, you have a partner (I guess this is really for the guys, but girls feel free to chime in), so your girl likes to have anal sex, but you are really not into it. Where's the line drawn there? Should the guy close his eyes and think of England and do what his girl likes or is he justified in saying, "No way, baby, I'm not going up there!"

(This is purely hypothetical, by the way, as I've never found myself in this situation. Was just wonderin'.)

Actually, what about the other side too. A guy likes it and a girl's not into it. Should she give in or not? I think the girl has a much better case for refusal.

dezhen2001
01-08-2003, 04:23 PM
an jie: of course it is man - u just gotta look at the links design sifu and others keep posting ;)

dawood

eulerfan
01-08-2003, 05:11 PM
Originally posted by Serpent


D@mn boy, who doesn't!?

I'm going to touch on a very iffy subject here, so if people (Gene) think it needs collaring, then just say the word...

OK, you have a partner (I guess this is really for the guys, but girls feel free to chime in), so your girl likes to have anal sex, but you are really not into it. Where's the line drawn there? Should the guy close his eyes and think of England and do what his girl likes or is he justified in saying, "No way, baby, I'm not going up there!"

(This is purely hypothetical, by the way, as I've never found myself in this situation. Was just wonderin'.)

Actually, what about the other side too. A guy likes it and a girl's not into it. Should she give in or not? I think the girl has a much better case for refusal.

You are ALWAYS justified in saying, "no way baby, I'm not going to go there." However, if you do, she is that much more likely to pull the same thing with you about something you want. Like I said, negotiation. If she wants it that bad, she should provide you with the incentive.

I would, and have, said no way, not now, not ever. It is one thing if your partner just isn't 'into' what you are 'into'. It's another thing if what you are 'into' involves your partner experiencing pain and discomfort. If I had to do that to get what I wanted, I'd go without. It would take some pretty Herculean tasks to sweeten that deal for me.

Chang Style Novice
01-08-2003, 05:26 PM
I really surprised my last girlfriend when I stuck my finger in her nether parts during cunnilingus. Every gal I'd been with prior to that practically insisted on a little bootie play during just about any sex antic. I had gotten to the point where I assumed it was what every sheperson liked (they'd tried it with me too, but it gave me no thrill at all.) But the last one didn't like it at all! I got a big lecture. I didn't really need it - I figured it was for her pleasure since it definitely wasn't for mine! But it sure taught me to ask first.

Serpent
01-08-2003, 05:27 PM
Pretty much the way I feel about these things. To be honest, I really can't see the attraction in it for either party!

rubthebuddha
01-08-2003, 05:31 PM
agreed. i'm even ¼ greek, and i don't see the draw to back-door banditry, hetero or otherwise.

must be a german thing. :confused:

Chang Style Novice
01-08-2003, 05:33 PM
All the more reason to watch the Sue Johanson show on Oxygen!

That is, if seeing a sweet old lady pull a *****/buttplug/whathtehellisthat? from her desk drawer and start explaining proper usage isn't enough for you.

Heh! The censor asterisks out ***** but not buttplug!

eulerfan
01-08-2003, 05:35 PM
I should probably add a caveat for the guy refusing.

Women can refuse without worry since it's difficult to find a woman who is into that. Guys who are into that are a dime a dozen, however.

If you won't, she'll have no real problem finding a guy who, not only will, but will bend over backwards for the opportunity.

Serpent
01-08-2003, 05:35 PM
My previous reply was with regard to eulerfan's response.

CSN, you're lucky you didn't get a double thigh head crush! I can see where you're coming from, but I sure wouldn't go near there without asking. In fact, I'd have to be asked, cos I wouldn't do it voluntarily and, even if she asked real nice, I still don't think I'd do it! :eek: ;)

RTB, if the greeks even don't like it, then who is anyone else to argue! I think you're right. Something weird going on with those Germans.

Serpent
01-08-2003, 05:40 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan
I should probably add a caveat for the guy refusing.

Women can refuse without worry since it's difficult to find a woman who is into that. Guys who are into that are a dime a dozen, however.

If you won't, she'll have no real problem finding a guy who, not only will, but will bend over backwards for the opportunity.

Is that right? In your experience? I wonder what the attraction is. It can't just be the tightness factor.

(Oh man, this huge thread must really be teetering on the edge now!)

eulerfan
01-08-2003, 05:40 PM
Okay, I have a question.

If a guy refuses regular old sex with a woman when it's 'that time' for her, is she justified in refusing to give him pleasure during that time?

Chang Style Novice
01-08-2003, 05:44 PM
What do you mean by "give pleasure"? Good conversation? Letting him pick the movie? Cooking his favorite meal?

If you don't wanna do something sexually at any time, for any reason, you're justified. It's your body. On the other hand, if you're just doing it to be petulant, you can reasonably expect petulance in return.

rubthebuddha
01-08-2003, 05:45 PM
maybe it's cause i'm only a quarter. perhaps if i had more greek in me then i'd ... want more greek in me. :eek:

or maybe i just didn't have any ancestors serve in alexander the great's army :D

or maybe i enjoy the feeling of a good, satisfying sitdown in the bafroom. gimme the newest issue of "motor trend" and i'm happy. perhaps if i was a little looser in back, such events wouldn't have the same panache or appeal.

but since i'm not all that keen on it for myself, the desire to do it to someone else isn't all that present, either.

eulerfan
01-08-2003, 05:50 PM
Originally posted by Chang Style Novice
If you don't wanna do something sexually at any time, for any reason, you're justified. It's your body. On the other hand, if you're just doing it to be petulant, you can reasonably expect petulance in return.

Petulent is unreasonably peevish. Yes, it is being peevish. I'm asking if it's unreasonble.

Serpent
01-08-2003, 05:51 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan
Okay, I have a question.

If a guy refuses regular old sex with a woman when it's 'that time' for her, is she justified in refusing to give him pleasure during that time?

I think it's only fair that if she ain't getting any, then why should he. He's always got his old roommate (the right hand) for release.

One way around it is for both partners to "lay hands" on each other, circumventing the issue at... hand.

These euphemisms are gonna get weird, I can tell.

Chang Style Novice
01-08-2003, 05:56 PM
Okay, I'll try to be clearer.

He doesn't want play Moses and 'part the Red Sea' as it were. It's his body, and that should be respected. She doesn't want to blow him if she's not getting hers. It's her body, and that should be respected. Either of them could be considered to be petulant in this situation. I don't think sex is exclusively about getting your rocks off or getting your partner's rocks off. Both count. Neither one has to happen every time.

rubthebuddha
01-08-2003, 06:00 PM
was about to say, "someone give chang style a cookie," but then i thought about the possibilities for misinterpretation and decided to hold off on that exclamation.

Serpent
01-08-2003, 06:08 PM
Originally posted by Chang Style Novice
Okay, I'll try to be clearer.

He doesn't want play Moses and 'part the Red Sea' as it were. It's his body, and that should be respected. She doesn't want to blow him if she's not getting hers. It's her body, and that should be respected. Either of them could be considered to be petulant in this situation. I don't think sex is exclusively about getting your rocks off or getting your partner's rocks off. Both count. Neither one has to happen every time.

In that case, would you consider my solution a good compromise? After all, it's only a few days. Jeez, surely you people can get by without it for a few days if nothing else works! ;)

Chang Style Novice
01-08-2003, 06:10 PM
I'm a sexual 17 year cicada - not really the one to ask about that.:(

eulerfan
01-08-2003, 06:11 PM
Originally posted by Chang Style Novice
Okay, I'll try to be clearer.

He doesn't want play Moses and 'part the Red Sea' as it were. It's his body, and that should be respected. She doesn't want to blow him if she's not getting hers. It's her body, and that should be respected. Either of them could be considered to be petulant in this situation. I don't think sex is exclusively about getting your rocks off or getting your partner's rocks off. Both count. Neither one has to happen every time.

It's not just that the woman isn't getting hers.

Imagine, for instance, that you were to come down with some totally harmless, non contagious, say a skin condition. It flares up every once in a while. Your girlfriend refuses to have relations with you during this time. She asked you to take care of her, though. Would your biggest probelm be that your weren't getting yours?

Serpent
01-08-2003, 06:13 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan


It's not just that the woman isn't getting hers.

Imagine, for instance, that you were to come down with some totally harmless, non contagious, say a skin condition. It flares up every once in a while. Your girlfriend refuses to have relations with you during this time. She asked you to take care of her, though. Would your biggest probelm be that your weren't getting yours?

I would suggest Scrabble.

Chang Style Novice
01-08-2003, 06:18 PM
"It's not just that the woman isn't getting hers."

Hmm...I'm not sure where you're coming from on this. Sure, it's not just that she's not getting hers. It's that he wants his while she's not getting hers. If this isn't about mutuality, what is it about? Sure, he's not going to be harmed by menstruation, but no-one is harmed by oral sex either, and some folks refuse to perform or recieve that act. Wierd as that seems to me, it should still be respected.

eulerfan
01-08-2003, 06:20 PM
Originally posted by Serpent

One way around it is for both partners to "lay hands" on each other, circumventing the issue at... hand.

These euphemisms are gonna get weird, I can tell.

My experience has been that a guy can either totally hang or he can't hang AT ALL. If he won't have sex, he won't do anything.

eulerfan
01-08-2003, 06:22 PM
CSN, okay, my analogy but she doesn't ask you to do anything to her. What's that like?

Chang Style Novice
01-08-2003, 06:26 PM
Well, I consider it unreasonably squeamish. But it's not about me - it's about principles. If you are with someone who doesn't share your sexual principles, either someone's going to have to compromise, or change, or you ought to split up.

I just don't feel it's my place to say either "he should give it to her" or "she should give it to him." They are equally not-my-business statements.

TaoBoy
01-08-2003, 06:37 PM
Okay, I've been away recovering from that Eulerfan spanking.

I'm back and I have to say it was an enthalling experience. Now, may I suggest some satin and a blindfold. You can go first....


Originally posted by eulerfan
Okay, I have a question.

If a guy refuses regular old sex with a woman when it's 'that time' for her, is she justified in refusing to give him pleasure during that time?

Why does it have to be 'regular old sex'?
If either party doesn't want to go there at that particular time there are other choices. So many choices. Like satin and blindfolds for example. ;)

TaoBoy
01-08-2003, 06:42 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan
CSN, okay, my analogy but she doesn't ask you to do anything to her. What's that like?

I'll field this one.

There is nothing worse than not knowing what:
1. your partner likes
2. what gets your partner off
3. what your partner doesn't like
4. what your partner is repulsed by

I hereby propose explicit conversations about sexual activities amongst all couples!

Getting a bit of direction is a good thing in my book. Now, eulerfan, a little to the left. And lower. ;)

eulerfan
01-08-2003, 06:42 PM
Well, when somebody indicates that the idea of having sex with me is disgusting, my feelings are a bit hurt. Regardless of the circumstances, you are rejecting a human being.

To make a person feel that way and expect them to give you pleasure is incredibly cold, pitiless and solipsistic to me.

It's happened to me when the guy never asked for anything and I could deal with that. It hurts but, like you said, you can't demand such a thing.

I've heard of guys asking and I always think that I would get really angry if that happened to me.

Serpent
01-08-2003, 07:38 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan


My experience has been that a guy can either totally hang or he can't hang AT ALL. If he won't have sex, he won't do anything.

Well, that's just bloody weird. There's more to sex than intercourse. I've had some of my most memorable sexual experiences where no intercourse occurred at all.

When I was a teenager, I was lucky to get to intercourse. In fact, for some guys they're lucky to get undressed before it's all over! ;) But I digress.

If a guy can only see sex as intercourse and nothing else is worth the time then he is seriously missing out on a lot of fun, IMO.

Serpent
01-08-2003, 07:44 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan
Well, when somebody indicates that the idea of having sex with me is disgusting, my feelings are a bit hurt. Regardless of the circumstances, you are rejecting a human being.

To make a person feel that way and expect them to give you pleasure is incredibly cold, pitiless and solipsistic to me.

It's happened to me when the guy never asked for anything and I could deal with that. It hurts but, like you said, you can't demand such a thing.

I've heard of guys asking and I always think that I would get really angry if that happened to me.

So, we finally get to the root of your question! ;)

I have to admit that I'm not keen on intercourse while the girl is "on". (Here come those euphemisms again).

It's no judgement on the woman, it's no rejection of her humanity. I just have this thing about a bloody d!ck. (Oops. Should probably have used a euphemism there!) But I wouldn't necessarily expect to be entertained by her either. And by the same token, there are other things to do. Like Scrabble.

It all comes down to the respect thing again. If a girl is hurt because a guy doesn't like to to there while she's bleeding, then to me that says more about her than him. To feel rejected is a sign of insecurity. There are still hands that don't have to go inside and there's the whole rest of the body to play with.

And if nothing else, just wait a couple of days and then make up for it.

Hmmm. Maybe this is a case in favour of the back door banditry we discussed earlier! :eek:

Serpent
01-08-2003, 07:45 PM
Gene's gonna have a cow when he comes back to this thread again.

eulerfan
01-08-2003, 07:57 PM
Originally posted by Serpent

To feel rejected is a sign of insecurity.

Oh. Okay. Well, I do have insecurites. So, back to what I was asking. Do you find this unreasonably insecure?

And I meant, if he won't have sex while your "on", he won't do anything sexual while you're "on".

Serpent
01-08-2003, 08:12 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan


Oh. Okay. Well, I do have insecurites. So, back to what I was asking. Do you find this unreasonably insecure?

And I meant, if he won't have sex while your "on", he won't do anything sexual while you're "on".

Intercourse while you're "on" is quite reasonable to refuse, in my mind. As is cunnilingus! :eek:

However, to do nothing is a bit extreme. You can still play around, he can still use his hands to "bring you home" ( ;) ) without going inside, etc.

He certainly shouldn't refuse to touch you, yet expect you to relieve him, that's just arrogant.

However, I don't think it's unreasonably insecure unless a big issue is made out of it. I mean, if she's all like, "You don't want to make love to me! You hate me!" then she deserves a slap (metaphorically speaking). I'm sure the guy would quite happily set her straight and shag her buttocks off a few days later.

eulerfan
01-08-2003, 08:56 PM
Cool.

Shirt came.

Pictures tomorrow.

Promise.

Suggest kf poses now.

eulerfan
01-08-2003, 08:56 PM
THANK YOU GENE!!!!:D :D :D :D

Chang Style Novice
01-08-2003, 09:00 PM
Woohoo!

Give us some taiji, hot stuff. In honor of all the spanking talk, "Single Whip" seems appropriate.

Serpent
01-08-2003, 09:18 PM
Yeehaa!

I second the vote for single whip. Also snake creeps down or swallow splashes water. And let's see your horse stance.

And all this is wearing only the got qi shirt, right? ;)

TaoBoy
01-08-2003, 09:37 PM
Have any of you peeps seen Adaptation yet?
It's the latest film by the guys who did Being John Malkovic.

It's a classic - and just to keep the sex talk moving there are quite a few masterbation scenes. :eek:

Serpent
01-08-2003, 09:46 PM
Sounds great. Being John Malcovich was mad good.

Is Adaptation in cinemas now?

TaoBoy
01-08-2003, 09:49 PM
In cinemas right now.

It's about a screenwriter (Charles Kaufman) who is trying to adapt a book but is having trouble, so he writes himself into his own screenplay. Amazingly the movie is actually written by Charles Kaufman.

Got it?

Serpent
01-08-2003, 09:50 PM
Sounds about right for those guys! ;)

Chang Style Novice
01-08-2003, 09:50 PM
Malkovich! Malkovich! Malkovich!

Serpent
01-08-2003, 09:53 PM
Originally posted by Chang Style Novice
Malkovich! Malkovich! Malkovich!

That scene where he took the trip himself was some of the best cinema of recent years. Absolutely brilliant!

Chang Style Novice
01-08-2003, 09:55 PM
Just subtly suggesting you doublecheck the spelling, actually.;)

TaoBoy
01-08-2003, 09:56 PM
I can't believe I spelled Malkovich wrong in my last post. D'oh!

I think BJM is a better movie. But, this latest movie is great.

What about LOTR2?

Did you see the grappling match between Gollum and Sam. Gollum is a text book BJJ player. He takes Sam's back and then puts both hooks in. Brilliant.

Gollum would choke Royce.

Chang Style Novice
01-08-2003, 10:00 PM
In that one scene, I was beginning to think Gollum would choke Gollum! You know the one I mean.

I haven't seen any new movies since The Two Towers. That probably won't change for a while on account of money issues. BUT! I now have access to the UT library's collection of VHS and DVD, and they have tons of great stuff. Especially if you're into old stuff like I am.

Serpent
01-08-2003, 10:02 PM
Originally posted by Chang Style Novice
Just subtly suggesting you doublecheck the spelling, actually.;)

Gotcha! Sorry, missed that.

;)

As for LOTR2, there was a whole thread a few days back entitled Gollum does BJJ! Dig it up, it's good reading.

TaoBoy
01-08-2003, 10:06 PM
Yeah I did catch some of that Gollum thread. Neat stuff.

Serpent
01-08-2003, 10:14 PM
However, did you notice how Gollum's BJJ was beaten by striking and multiple opponents?

Heh heh heh! ;)

TaoBoy
01-08-2003, 10:34 PM
Nah, it's was beaten by a farkin sharp sword!

Serpent
01-08-2003, 10:45 PM
Well, yeah... eventually.

Aha, but it was still defeated by a traditional method!

(OK, I know, I know!)

:D

TaoBoy
01-08-2003, 10:55 PM
Have you seen those sh!tty anti-terrorism/let's all be top little Aussies tv commercials? What a crock?





:rolleyes:

Serpent
01-08-2003, 10:59 PM
Yeah, what a crock indeed. There was a great cartoon in the paper. All these SWAT guys surrounding a house and a couple of suits were at the front door, talking to the homeowner. The suits were saying, "It has come to our attention that you are neither alert nor alarmed."

Classic. ;)

I gotta go. Catch y'all later.

M_ArtsMargie
01-09-2003, 10:10 AM
Hello everyone! Very interesting topics are floating in this thread, and I have to say you all have great point of views on them. It's cool to hear mens and womens experience on here.

Movies....I just recently watched The Hot Chick! Good, and funny movie. I think it is one of Rob schneiders best movies. If you like Duece Bigalow, you 'll like this one.

:D

FatherDog
01-09-2003, 11:57 AM
In regards to CSN being lectured for going downstairs without asking...

That's why it's such a pain in the ass (no pun intended) breaking up with people and trying to find someone new. You have to relearn a whole new set of likes, dislikes, and forbidden areas. It's like switching from Mac to PC, except that there's 4.3 billion different operating systems out there and they all have a subtly different syntax. And you really, really don't want a crash whilst you're naked. :D

Still, though, bad assumption on your part, CSN, even if you did have a string of chicks beforehand who liked a little booty play. I've slept with at least five women who enjoyed being choked during sex, but if I were to start assuming about that, I'd wind up getting arrested. :eek: Always start from square 1, or talk it out beforehand. Preferably the latter, but regrettably most girls aren't that open.

As for the Red Wings question, one of the most important parts of a sexual relationship is reciprocity. If he doesn't want to do anything for her, she's perfectly justified in not doing anything for him during the same time period. Or, better, trading off for a similar circumstance that disgusts her. "Okay, hon, but you taste nasty when you've been eating kimchee. No nookie for you on those nights."

eulerfan
01-09-2003, 12:14 PM
Hmm. I've never even met a guy who claimed to have his red wings. That's a completely different ball park, to me.

But I don't know about it being that hard to learn a new lover's likes and dislikes. You just go slow and pay attention. At this point in my life, my lovers are very experienced as am I. Usually, the guy will lightly rub the backdoor a little bit. Obviously, he is seeing how receptive I am to this. At this point, I know what he's asking and gently say, "uh-uh." The hand journeys away from that area.

That's one way.

However, if she isn't very experienced, she may not realize that that isn't all you intend to so. So you need to ask. If she isn't experienced, though, it will probably be uncomfortable for her. The best option is to make the question/answer session a part of foreplay. When you are making out and caressing, ask in low, almost whispery voice. So it's dirty talk and investigation all rolled into one. If she's especially shy, make them yes/no questions.

MightyB
01-09-2003, 12:32 PM
Euler should have a radio show or something.


Some things are a little too disgusting when Aunt Flo visits the ladies. Oral is out of the question, so is mutual mastu rbat ion. Parting the red sea with what was meant to be there ain't so bad as long as you got a towel.

The finger in the back door during intercourse seems to be fairly common. Sometimes it works great as a "magic Button". I tend to like to wait-my-turn so to speak, but sometimes, in the heat of things, that can get difficult. That's where the magic button comes in to play (euphomism after euphomism). Often I've found that when the chick is teetering on the edge she needs that little shove to get her off the cliff. You gently, and not too deeply, press the magic button and wallah-- she goes boom. With her deed done, it's safe to release. Because we all know that it's easy for a chick to continue after climaxing, but it tisn't so easy for the guy. That's why it's important to wait your turn gentlemen.

red5angel
01-09-2003, 12:48 PM
I'm giving this thread a PG-13 rating! No real violence except for a little spanking but some blood and partial nudity.

Fatherdog - you dated a few women who liked to be choked?! Stop picking them up at gaming conventions. Or your local Goth club....


Here is my take on this whole back door thing. I don't know if it is discussed much in psychology except maybe Freudian and we all know about that cigar smoker.
If you consider the location of the prostate you will quickly begin to understand why men seem to obsess over this particular location. Unfortunately we often forget that the fairer sex does not have one.
Now, I am not saying that those guys who like the backdoor action are really looking to catch a little ball. I am saying that I think it's mostly subconcious. A location that can potentially be a great source of pleasure for one, can just be irritating for another.

That I said the swede I mentioned earlier must have had a prostate because one of the reasons I broke up with her is because she wanted me there more then I wanted to go there. It's like going to disney land, every so often is ok but keeerist you go everyday and you might as well work there.

FatherDog
01-09-2003, 01:20 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan
Hmm. I've never even met a guy who claimed to have his red wings. That's a completely different ball park, to me.

I do, in fact. But I wasn't really referring to that specifically; it was just shorter to say than "gratifying a woman during that time of the month."



But I don't know about it being that hard to learn a new lover's likes and dislikes. You just go slow and pay attention. At this point in my life, my lovers are very experienced as am I. Usually, the guy will lightly rub the backdoor a little bit. Obviously, he is seeing how receptive I am to this. At this point, I know what he's asking and gently say, "uh-uh." The hand journeys away from that area.

That's the approach I generally use with this sort of thing. But there's a /lot/ of potential likes and dislikes in sexuality, and you're unlikely to happen across all of them in one session. It takes time to figure out who likes what when and where. When you go out with someone new, there's always that sense of starting from square one again.

Not that that's always a bad thing...


Originally posted by red5angel
Fatherdog - you dated a few women who liked to be choked?! Stop picking them up at gaming conventions. Or your local Goth club....

Actually, though I do attend gaming conventions and used to regularly attend goth clubs, I've never actually picked up a woman from either. Although I have picked up a woman whilst talking after an actual game, on a few occasions.

Mostly I meet women through mutual friends. Considering my near-hermit lifestyle, it's just about my only option these days. :(

red5angel
01-09-2003, 01:25 PM
and they still want to be choked?! Ironically I just watched Rising Sun not too long ago...


on this whole figuring out someones likes. I suggest either getting a book and pointing at the pages you both like, or just getting naked and poking and prodding each other until the otherone screams. Then all you have to do is figure out if it was a good scream or a bad scream......

eulerfan
01-09-2003, 01:30 PM
OKAY!!!!

This is just to tide you over until I can get more decent pictures developed and have my sister scan them at work.

You can't even read the got qi?.

NO MAKING FUN OF MY FORM!!!!

eulerfan
01-09-2003, 01:32 PM
And Serpent wanted horse.

MightyB
01-09-2003, 01:42 PM
Euler, these pictures do you more justice. The one with you on the bed isn't that great of a pic.

Anyway, Red5, I nearly doubled over laughing, I think I actually spit coffee out my nose. I'm rereading and it's pretty much all quotable. You should write children's books.

Fatherdog, choking is some weird and dangerous ****. I met a girl that liked an occasional punch in the stomache-- my initial response was, "what the f_ck!" All well. It's all good.

red5angel
01-09-2003, 01:45 PM
PUNCH IN THE STOMACH!?!??!?

Ok some things are wierd but that is reeeally weird. did you?

The picture on the bed is an ok candid shot, but I liked her in the dress, classy.

MightyB
01-09-2003, 01:50 PM
Didn't get to see the dress,

Did I? Hell Yeah. Why the frig not? The chick was psycho dude.

eulerfan
01-09-2003, 02:02 PM
Here's me in the dress.

All right, yeah, is somebody wants something really weird, they'd bettter learn to just ask. You can't expect your partner to try every possible kink out on you.

MightyB
01-09-2003, 02:09 PM
Euler,

You still want to do the butter wrestling?

eulerfan
01-09-2003, 02:13 PM
Nope, still nursing the angry, raging lesbian wounds. :mad:

MightyB
01-09-2003, 02:20 PM
Euler,

I was reading the previous posts on that thread. From the way the guys talked, I thought something "came out" in one of those "what have we learned on KFO this year" threads that I usually ignore.

eulerfan
01-09-2003, 02:29 PM
Nope.

I'm sure many have taken the 'eulerfan is a dyke' joke seriously, though. Considering my personality, it's not so left-field that it's obviously untrue.

red5angel
01-09-2003, 02:33 PM
OOOPS! Eulerfan, I hope you know I was just teasin you yesterday! I totally forgot about that incident!

MightyB
01-09-2003, 02:36 PM
that Eulerfan is straight. She will demonstrate this by butter wrestling me.


eWallace is the only greased lesbian on the forum. So it is written, so it shall be done.

FatherDog
01-09-2003, 03:13 PM
Nice muscle definition in the legs, eulerfan.

MightyB: choking's certainly an odd fetish, although in my experience a more common one than you might think. I suspect it relates to a feeling of surrender or lack of control, but I'm not a psychiatrist.

I don't think it's terribly dangerous, as long as the choker is careful about things. As I said, I was involved with no less than five women who enjoyed it, and none of them ever wound up injured.

Now, me, on the other hand... if I meet anyone on this thread, buy me a drink and I'll show you a few bite scars. :D

Chang Style Novice
01-09-2003, 03:19 PM
Fatherdog beat me to it - you got some bodacious stems, honey!

TaoBoy
01-09-2003, 03:46 PM
ewallace has greased himself up?

:eek:

Serpent
01-09-2003, 04:14 PM
eulerfan... d@mn, what can I say. You smokin', honey!

More pics please! ;)

TaoBoy
01-09-2003, 04:35 PM
Originally posted by Serpent
eulerfan... d@mn, what can I say. You smokin', honey!

More pics please! ;)

Gees, she already sent you a photo of her and a horse!

Serpent
01-09-2003, 05:01 PM
Originally posted by TaoBoy


Gees, she already sent you a photo of her and a horse!

I know. I'm insatiable.

M_ArtsMargie
01-09-2003, 05:29 PM
Why don't you all post your picture?

Eulerfan is the only one that is posting her picture. That is not fair.

Here's Johnny (http://store.yahoo.com/martialartsmart/marartshirsp.html)

Here's Gene (http://store.yahoo.com/martialartsmart/shaolstylwar.html)

Here's Me (http://store.yahoo.com/martialartsmart/marartshirti.html)

Here is one of the Supervisors (http://store.yahoo.com/martialartsmart/45-78.html)

Here is Patrick (http://store.yahoo.com/martialartsmart/happymonk.html)

and...here's Kevin (http://store6.yimg.com/I/martialartsmart_1722_44947346)

GeneChing
01-09-2003, 05:58 PM
Actually, I think that's a compliment Margie. It means that you are more attractive in real life than in your avatar. And that's a pretty good looking avatar.

@PLUGO
01-09-2003, 06:01 PM
who the heck is "patrick" and "kevin"???

JOHNNY
01-09-2003, 06:41 PM
Originally posted by Design Sifu
who the heck is "patrick" and "kevin"???
Its a surprise.;) I hate that pick of me oh well.
johnny:D

GeneChing
01-09-2003, 07:01 PM
Glad the shirt fits, ef. I hope you'll treat the boys to a few more pics that than over time. Welcome to the official got qi club.

As for that earlier topic, blood is a great lubricant until it congeals. All MA should appreciate that.

As for the got qi guys - check this out. (http://www.hoogerbrugge.com/ )

Serpent
01-09-2003, 08:10 PM
Originally posted by GeneChing
Glad the shirt fits, ef. I hope you'll treat the boys to a few more pics that than over time. Welcome to the official got qi club.


Coming from Gene, that's an order! ;)



As for that earlier topic, blood is a great lubricant until it congeals. All MA should appreciate that.


:eek: Why do I ever worry that Gene will think that this thread is outta hand!? :)



As for the got qi guys - check this out. (http://www.hoogerbrugge.com/ )

And that is just.... wrong!

eulerfan
01-09-2003, 08:19 PM
red5, I know you were kidding. I made the declaration that accusations of lesbianism would result in no greased wrestling, though. I have to follow through.

CSN and Fatherdog, thank you. Leg lifts and squats and lunges, oh my!

Serpent, that's why I'm your girl, right? More to come. I promise.

Gene, I'm honored.

eulerfan
01-09-2003, 08:23 PM
P.S. I've decided on a new school. Pretty sure I'll be all about Northern Longfist pretty soon.

Serpent
01-09-2003, 08:28 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan
Serpent, that's why I'm your girl, right? More to come. I promise.


You d@mn right there! There should be a blowing a kiss smilie! ;)

Congratulations on the new school idea too. If the sifu there knows his stuff then that's a great choice. Best of luck with it.

eulerfan
01-09-2003, 09:05 PM
Inside Kung-fu Magazine (not the best kung-fu magazine, to be sure, but it is a magazine with pages and staples and all) rated him the fifth most influential martial artist in the U.S. of all time. Jackie Chan was 10.

He talked to me for a while.

Executive summary is as follows: stick to your opponent

Serpent
01-09-2003, 09:25 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan
Executive summary is as follows: stick to your opponent

What do you mean by that? You lost me a bit...

SevenStar
01-09-2003, 09:34 PM
I nominate eulerfan as an honorary got qi? girl! I nominate myself as the got qi? guy

SevenStar
01-09-2003, 09:37 PM
well d@mn... I didn't see Gene's post...

Anyway, Eulerfan, why are you leaving shaolin do?

Xebsball
01-09-2003, 09:42 PM
hey peeps, just came back some hours ago, lost my night creature skill aparently -> its only like 2:30 and im already dead sleepy and with mean red eyes.
i see everyone kept posting without my presence, i guess you just couldnt wait for me to come back could you :mad:
now i have to give 110% to keep up with all the new posts and threads and stuff. :o (catching my breath)
btw, cool pics eulerfan :cool:

SevenStar
01-09-2003, 09:45 PM
umm, where'd you go?

Xebsball
01-09-2003, 09:51 PM
taking tests for uni, outa town
will make a full report of it later

eulerfan
01-09-2003, 09:54 PM
Serpent,
He just talked for a really long time about how, when you stay out of range looking for openings, it's stupid because you can't plan what is going to happen. So, you should get into your opponent's range immediately. If you can't react immediately, you're done for. No amount of staying out of range and figuring out what to do will help you. So, get in there and stay in there. Or you'll never improve.

Sevenstar,
I've not become disillusioned with the school or anything. It's a really long story. Short version: I'm stuck on a classmate who is married and is sort of stuck on me as well. He's not going anywhere and nothing good can come of this. So I'm gonna fly.

Serpent
01-09-2003, 10:06 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan
Serpent,
He just talked for a really long time about how, when you stay out of range looking for openings, it's stupid because you can't plan what is going to happen. So, you should get into your opponent's range immediately. If you can't react immediately, you're done for. No amount of staying out of range and figuring out what to do will help you. So, get in there and stay in there. Or you'll never improve.


Fair enough, I understand now. I would look at it more as make sure you are always dictating the range you want to be in, but I guess that's just semantics. ;)

eulerfan
01-09-2003, 10:10 PM
He may have said that as well. He talked for a really long time.

Serpent
01-09-2003, 10:15 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan
He may have said that as well. He talked for a really long time.

LOL. I bet it'll be a really great experience for you. Be sure to let us know how you go.

eulerfan
01-09-2003, 10:27 PM
will do

and I'll add pictures:D

SevenStar
01-09-2003, 10:29 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan
Serpent,
He just talked for a really long time about how, when you stay out of range looking for openings, it's stupid because you can't plan what is going to happen. So, you should get into your opponent's range immediately. If you can't react immediately, you're done for. No amount of staying out of range and figuring out what to do will help you. So, get in there and stay in there. Or you'll never improve.

Sevenstar,
I've not become disillusioned with the school or anything. It's a really long story. Short version: I'm stuck on a classmate who is married and is sort of stuck on me as well. He's not going anywhere and nothing good can come of this. So I'm gonna fly.

Yeah, he's right about the distancing - that will probably be good for you - I think I remember a few posts where you said you prefer to stay at a distance and watching for openings. The way I look at it, punches and kicks are tools to get me inside. Once I'm in, then it's time to play.

The situation you described happened at my school, but had a worse ending - a guy was stuck on a married girl at the school, and they started hanging out as friends - at first - they ended up having sex, and her hubby, an ex ranger, found out. There was no fight, but they got into a heated argument which ended inthe ranger punking out the guy. The girl then left the school.

TaoBoy
01-09-2003, 10:32 PM
Originally posted by M_ArtsMargie
Why don't you all post your picture?

Eulerfan is the only one that is posting her picture. That is not fair.

I posted a shot of me pages back - when the whole image posting thing started.

In fact, just yesterday I posted it again on the avatar thread.

But if you want more of me Margie - just ask. ;)

TaoBoy
01-09-2003, 10:35 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan
Serpent,
He just talked for a really long time about how, when you stay out of range looking for openings, it's stupid because you can't plan what is going to happen. So, you should get into your opponent's range immediately. If you can't react immediately, you're done for. No amount of staying out of range and figuring out what to do will help you. So, get in there and stay in there. Or you'll never improve.


I like his theory. You should be able to dictate from in range - if not you are lost. Take for example those who fight only at, say, kicking distance, they can be lost when in a clinch or being elbowed etc.

Are you gonna tell us his name?



Sevenstar,
I've not become disillusioned with the school or anything. It's a really long story. Short version: I'm stuck on a classmate who is married and is sort of stuck on me as well. He's not going anywhere and nothing good can come of this. So I'm gonna fly.

Ouch! Sticky situation. Methinks this is a good move!

eulerfan
01-09-2003, 10:37 PM
Yeah, just to be safe and make sure he doesn't keep after me, last thing I said to him was, "I am frankly amazed at how much of a (unt you turned out to be."

On the off chance that didn't make him think he has no chance with me, if you guys can think of anything that would make you think you had no chance with a girl, that would remove any doubt from your mind, let me know.

This little fu(ker is nothing if not persistent.

eulerfan
01-09-2003, 10:39 PM
Originally posted by TaoBoy

Are you gonna tell us his name?


Jeff Bolt

TaoBoy
01-09-2003, 10:40 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan
Yeah, just to be safe and make sure he doesn't keep after me, last thing I said to him was, "I am frankly amazed at how much of a (unt you turned out to be."

On the off chance that didn't make him think he has no chance with me, if you guys can think of anything that would make you think you had no chance with a girl, that would remove any doubt from your mind, let me know.

This little fu(ker is nothing if not persistent.

Write NO on his car bonnet with brake fluid.

TaoBoy
01-09-2003, 10:41 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan


Jeff Bolt

Name rings a bell.
Which school/style?

SevenStar
01-09-2003, 10:42 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan
Yeah, just to be safe and make sure he doesn't keep after me, last thing I said to him was, "I am frankly amazed at how much of a (unt you turned out to be."

On the off chance that didn't make him think he has no chance with me, if you guys can think of anything that would make you think you had no chance with a girl, that would remove any doubt from your mind, let me know.

This little fu(ker is nothing if not persistent.

photoshop pics of you and I together, and email them to him - seriously! :D I once got to kiss and grope all over a girl in my MT class because there were some guys messing with her that wouldn't take no for an answer. One day while they were around, she wanted me to stay with her, and she was like "kiss me" I was like wtf?:confused: but I didn't argue. we kissed and groped until they left; they didn't mess with her anymore.

eulerfan
01-09-2003, 10:44 PM
No, he doesn't want to just bed me. I can guarantee you that. He wants an affair. Something prolonged and real. He's not trying to seduce me. He's trying to woo me. Subtlety and time are his tools, here. That's why leaving is my only option.

eulerfan
01-09-2003, 10:46 PM
http://www.wushu-kungfu.com/

He starts you off with longfist then move you to crane.

TaoBoy
01-09-2003, 10:47 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan
No, he doesn't want to just bed me. I can guarantee you that. He wants an affair. Something prolonged and real. He's not trying to seduce me. He's trying to woo me. Subtlety and time are his tools, here. That's why leaving is my only option.

A simple "F*ck off" won't suffice?

TaoBoy
01-09-2003, 10:49 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan
http://www.wushu-kungfu.com/

He starts you off with longfist then move you to crane.


Aah - he's a student of Dr Yang.
That's why I know his name.
Good credentials.

Please tell us how it all goes.

Serpent
01-09-2003, 10:54 PM
SevenStar's suggestion is a good one. Get a good guy friend, preferably on ethat looks like a killer, to come and pick you up after class, something like that. Make sure you're seen together. When (unt looks over and sees you guys, have the friend stare him out a bit.

Maybe even have your friend act a little crazy, "You the fu(ker that won't leave my girl alone, huh?? PUNK??" that sort of thing.

Of course, this will only work if the male friend is up to the task, but it shouldn't be necessary to that far! ;)

eulerfan
01-09-2003, 11:15 PM
Hmmm. I don't think I know any really huge guys.

I know a guy who was a professional weight lifter. But not that well. He's more of my sister's friend. But, I think most of my friends would get a lot of joy from pretending to be a crazy boyfriend.

Would just plain crazy work?

SevenStar
01-09-2003, 11:28 PM
hmm...maybe, but it would be tougher.

rubthebuddha
01-10-2003, 12:15 AM
crazy won't, because it's easy to sniff out. the second he catches scent, that will motivate him further.

calling him bad names is a good start, but i'd avoid anything that has to do with body parts. some people get a rise off that and think you're just talking dirty to them.

you can also question his masculinity. something like, "you know, i just realized how effeminate you are. you remind me a lot of my sister."

MightyB
01-10-2003, 06:23 AM
And not a network one. More of a Univision or Telemundo soap opera-- "Phelipe loves me, but I no love him". Organ Music please. And Fade out to Commercial.

Gene or Margie, fill the break...

Xebsball
01-10-2003, 06:38 AM
Can i be the kid that is having problems due to drugs abuse?
Then my mom locks me up on my room so i cant go out to buy more drugs

"NOOOO!! MOTHERRRRRRR!! LET ME OUT"

red5angel
01-10-2003, 06:52 AM
Eulerfan, just remind the guy he is married and let him know you don't do that. Why the hell would he bother getting married in the first place if he wants to cheat?! Pathetic if you ask me.
If that doesn't work, explain to him the logisitcs of the thing an dthe psychology that results. First of all it's a three way relationship of sorts with one person in it unwillingly. Let's say he is looking for a way out of his marriage, then what happens when he seperates with his wife? Could you trust him then? Tell him this stuff it should get him off your back. If it doesn't he is just looking for a little action.

Chang Style Novice
01-10-2003, 07:04 AM
Eulerfan -

So at a guess, this guy in your SD class who's after you (and should be with his wife) is the evil manipulator/pr!ck that you told us about way back when? And who recently returned, causing you to have a crisis of confidence? Even if he isn't, it sounds like a really toxic situation.

This may be really harsh, but I think perhaps you should tell his wife and tell her to tell him to stop, and then tell him you told his wife and tell him to stop.

And if you really like this Jeff Bolt's pitch, go ahead and switch schools anyway, considering the issues you're having with your techer leaving.

MightyB
01-10-2003, 08:48 AM
I'd go to Jeff Bolt's class.

He's pretty big in the National Wushu and Traditional Kung Fu association-- I think it's called NACMEF or something like that. They are the ones that have the big tournaments in Baltimore and Orlando.

All I'm saying is that he's known in the real MA community.

KC Elbows
01-10-2003, 09:53 AM
Eulerfan,
I cannot tell you how much I recommend you study under Jeff Bolt. There aren't even words to define the degree to which you should study under someone of his caliber.

Out here, there are two people known for their ability to do chin na on the fly(in live fighting). One is a mantis guy who has nothing to do with what I'm gonna say, but he deserves his props. The second is my teacher.

Now, my teacher doesn't charge a dime for teaching, but there is no one, no one around here who fights kung fu and does not respect us, because we are dedicated and more afraid of ruining our kung fu than we are of ruining our spinal columns, spleens, or sacrums, which really isn't separate from spinal columns, but still is swell in selling the sweet sibalance.

Anyway, back to the story.

Now, my teacher, when discussing chin na skill and arts he'd love to learn, puts first among them Jeff Bolt and his fukien crane. My teacher loves that stuff, and has done a seminar of Jeff's where he says that Bolt showed chin na skill so crazy, he was impressed for life.

My teacher is a guy who can, on the fly against a guy who outweighs him by 80 lbs. who is coming at him full tilt(me), seize the split where the top part of the bicep is separate from the bottom and yank downward, forcing me into a head butt. Now, I'm talking high speed(generally I go at it with him as close to full speed as possible unless one of us is injured). I've not met anyone else who can take advantage of such a chin na on me on the fly. Yet he says Jeff Bolt is better.

Make the switch. I'm begging you. Jeff Bolt is so far beyond what you're doing now, and this is not meant to belittle what you're doing now, but to give Jeff the props he deserves. The man's class practices their staff work with volkswagon axels. They really fight with crane, not lose their style when they spar. They are the real deal, and high quality.

Ooooh, this is gonna drive me insane, just the thought of it.

People who have decided to stick with martial arts as a lifestyle should find the best they can reasonably learn from, and study from them. There is no other way I believe in. You're obviously dedicated. What you are learning now is a fine start, but you are dedicated, and so you are at the point where you should find the best, and Jeff Bolt is one of the best, better than you have learned from yet.

We've got one guy who's practicing with us who is moving in eight months to learn from a monk, a good monk. Although we will miss him dearly, he loves martial arts, and while we have a lot to teach, we recognize the difference between learning from us and from this monk, and we not only support his decision, but my teacher is working like gangbusters to give this guy as much kung fu to take with him so that the monk will look at him and say 'you have kung fu, here, let me show you the dim mak', and maybe someday he'll come back and share with us.:D

I am probably coming off as rabid about this, if so, don't take my tone too seriously. The fact is, the first school I studied in was completely against other learning, and so, once I moved on to 'adult martial arts', not only was I annoyed that I was not encouraged to follow it earlier, when it was clear to my old teachers that I was dedicated, but I was further annoyed because I could never share it with the people I practiced with before. I know that's not your circumstances, just babbling.

Study under the best whenever they are good enough people to study under. I have been in schools from your org. My impression is they were basically good people, and that those running the schools loved practicing martial arts. In addition, unlike the school I started in, they were more open to other styles and taught them where they had some experience. However, and keep in mind that I have not seen your particular school, but the seniors of your grandmaster that I saw were not in the same class as Jeff Bolt, although they were nice people, and, in all fairness, I'm probably not in the same class as Jeff Bolt. But I'm a lot closer from picking who I study under very carefully in my later training.

In my mind, the issue of the instructor who is being inappropriate is a non-issue here. Even if that weren't occuring, Jeff Bolt can teach you more than the teachers you have now, and, from everything I've heard, is a good guy. Why not? There is no question of loyalty- you've been on here and withstood criticism to your school and countered. I'm sure there are elements you like in the school socially, but they are at every good school you go to. He's just got better training to offer you right now, and he's probably not gonna make you sign in blood that you will never step foot in your old school. Probably.:D

Anyway, if you stepped foot in your old school as the fukien crane pro, I'll guarantee that mr. suave would think twice about bugging you after your first 'I've been practicing staff with a car axel, how about you, freak?' glance.

[DISCLAIMER- THIS WHOLE POST IS TOTALLY OUT OF LOYALTY TO MY TEACHER, WHOSE PEACE OF MIND IS LINKED TO THE CONCEPT OF HOT WOMEN DOING FUKIEN CRANE KUNG FU-- DO IT FOR MY TEACHER, HE'S THE SORT OF TEACHER WHO CAN LIKE THE IDEA OF HOT WOMEN DOING FUKIEN CRANE AND MANAGE TO STILL BE FAITHFUL TO HIS WIFE-- UNLIKE MR. SUAVE, WHO HASN'T THE CULTURE OR SUBTLETY NECESSARY TO UNDERSTAND THE HOTNESS THAT IS WOMEN AND FUKIEN CRANE]

eulerfan
01-10-2003, 10:20 AM
Thanks for all of your advice, guys.

I'll give it thought.

This is the first time I've had to go up against somebody we both know is smarter than me. It's usually very easy for me to scare the living bejeezis out of a guy I want out of my life. I am now on the other end. If I were to do anything to mess with his life, I'm sure he could end me in more ways than one. This must be part of the attraction.

The conundrum is that he's not trying to get rid of me, he's trying to keep me. I'm worried because every other time I've told him to 'fu(k off' before, he said he would but then redoubled his efforts.

He is looking for action but he is also looking for companionship. He is not happy with his wife. He tells me she's frigid, this may be a lie, but I've met her on more than one occasion and she is a profoundly uptight and uninteresting woman. He's unhappy with her, he thinks for these reasons. Finding somebody who differs in that respect would be much better. I'm the polar opposite in that respect.

But that is surely not his actual problem with her. There's something else, some other personality fault she has that he has the real problem with. Whatever that is, dollars to donuts, I've got it, too.

I've told him that. He said he heard me but he didn't. That's okay because I wasn't talking to him, anyway. I was talking to his subconscious. Planting seeds.

I think, the smarter a person is, the easier it is for him/her to go an entire life without a shred of genuine self-awareness.

His wife is certainly aware of his infidelities. She may face it, she may not. It is not my job to force her to do it if she's not ready. However, if she is willing to turn a blind eye to something I'm sure everybody can see, imagine how she will react if I force it on her. I may as well throw myself into a shark pit.

This is some tricky, tricky sh!t. I just want out.

FatherDog
01-10-2003, 10:23 AM
Obviously, I have no criteria to judge Sifu Bolt's qualifications, but from the sound of things, you have a rare opportunity here, eulerfan. I encourage you to go for it. I've always said that quality instruction and dedicated training partners are the best external ways to help your kung fu. Good luck! I'm happy for you.

As for your would-be suitor, voice activated tape-recorders provide all sorts of opportunities for a well-orchestrated blackmail-him-into-leaving-you-alone plan. SevenStar's suggestion is not a bad one, although you'd better make sure that whatever friend you pick for it is A) prepared to possibly be targetted for unpleasantness, depending on how obsessive/motivated this fella is, and B) not harboring any hidden hopes for a relationship with you. Let's not turn this into a sitcom plot.

A) is more of a problem here. Since he's attempting to cheat on his wife with you, the mere presence of a boyfriend is not an automatic deterrent; he just figures you'll take more convincing. And since he does martial arts, he may be (rightly or wrongly, depending on his skill level) more difficult to physically intimidate. Maybe if you have a friend who likes to collect firearms... This does have the potential to escalate things unpleasantly, though.

The easiest would be to simply cut off contact with him and screen your calls for a while. I don't know if that's a social possibility for you, though.

FatherDog
01-10-2003, 10:28 AM
Originally posted by eulerfan
His wife is certainly aware of his infidelities. She may face it, she may not. It is not my job to force her to do it if she's not ready. However, if she is willing to turn a blind eye to something I'm sure everybody can see, imagine how she will react if I force it on her. I may as well throw myself into a shark pit.

In this case, disregard my tape-recorder suggestion.

After reading over this latest post, I can say that the best thing to do is cut all social ties with him. You appear to be taking the first step by getting out of the class you both share, which is a good start. Like I said, start screening your calls, and don't go to social gatherings where you know he'll be. I don't know how much this is going to impact your social life, but from the sound of things, I'm beginning to suspect it may be a necessary step.

eulerfan
01-10-2003, 10:32 AM
KC,

Wow. I'm joining Jeff Bolt's school. That decision was already made. So, I would say that your post wasn't necessary except that it was totally awesome. I still had all these reservations about just dropping something I've spent a year and a half on. Now I'm feeling all gung-ho about it.

Thanks!

eulerfan
01-10-2003, 10:34 AM
P.S. My instructor is not being inappropriate. It's not him. He is a quality human being.

KC Elbows
01-10-2003, 11:03 AM
Euler,
Be gung ho. What you're entering into is a whole 'nuther world from where you came. You're at the point where not all teachers have much to teach you. You have to be pickier.

And I'm sure your instructor is a quality human being, but he's making some dimwitted decisions. I wouldn't become in any way tied to those decisions as a male friend, much less as if I were a woman, WHICH I MOST CERTAINLY AM NOT, THANK YOU!:D

Smart people making stupid decisions need to be left alone to make them, IMO. Of course, I could be totally screwing up, and messing with you making your own mistakes in life. Ah well, you'll decide what you decide. I know I did when faced with the same stupidity from the other direction, and the bad choice I made did give me a little more wisdom.

I never know what advice to give people. Don't take your contacts out after having jabanero peppers. It's really bad.

KC Elbows
01-10-2003, 11:06 AM
BTW, the jabanera thing? Really good advice. I'm serious here. Don't go there EVER.

KC Elbows
01-10-2003, 11:08 AM
People might want to remember the jabanera thing as something to avoid before dates as well. It can really be a mood killer if it gets in the wrong place. CSN.;) :p :D

red5angel
01-10-2003, 11:16 AM
"He is looking for action but he is also looking for companionship. He is not happy with his wife. He tells me she's frigid, this may be a lie, but I've met her on more than one occasion and she is a profoundly uptight and uninteresting woman. He's unhappy with her, he thinks for these reasons. Finding somebody who differs in that respect would be much better. I'm the polar opposite in that respect. "

Eulerfan, do yourself a huge favor, disconnect form this guy. You are a smart woman, you look good and I am sure the list goes on for all the reasons someone would want to date you.
Listen to what you say above and see what sort of sense that makes? You have met her a few times and you get that impression from her? How long did this guy date her before he decided to marry her? He knew what he was getting into. Marriage isn't easy, ask anyone who is married, it takes some work. If she isn't giving him what he wants or needs, there is probably alot going on there then just issues with her. I fhe is really and truly that unhappy with her, let him work through that first before you even consider getting to know him anymore.

I hate seeing this sort of thing. I see it all the time, these guys come along and they convince these girls they are in these marriages that suck, when what is really going on is the guy is not mature enough to carry lifes burdens and so at the first hint of trouble he bails, or cheats. It's really pathetic in my view.
I see girls like you all the time who are desireable, but who settle for these crappy relationships or non-relationships for who knows what reason. All I know Eulerfan is that the fact this guy has even put you in this position means you can do much better.

Am I making any sense here at all?

eulerfan
01-10-2003, 12:20 PM
KC, you aren't listening to me. The guy who is pursuing me and my instructor are TWO DIFFERENT PEOPLE. I can't even imagine my instructor being unfaithful to his soon to be wife. He is a good person. The guy who is pursuing me is in my class and is not a quality human being.

red5, I am listening to my advice. I'm even leaving the school I am currently in, despite having been there longer than this guy and that really chaps my @ss. But I'm hung up on this guy, I can't make myself feel differently than I do.

I'm just hoping against hope that there is some magical thing I can do to make him leave me alone. That way it will be easier, I won't have to rely so completely on my own willpower. While I appreciate your compliments and I do have confidence in myself, that doesn't really change the fact that I've been alone for close to a year, now.

So, it's sort of like being Persephone. Starving, looking at a pommegranite, thinking, "Hell isn't THAT bad." ;)

I won't eat it. But it would be REALLY nice if somebody would take it and hide it from me.

See what I'm saying.

KC Elbows
01-10-2003, 01:16 PM
Well, that pretty much makes clear why my handle isn't KC Cerebellum or KC Higher Cognitive Functions.:D

Sorry, I thought you were saying your instructor was a decent guy despite the advances. I understand now. This other guy is hitting on you, but you're really in love with your instructor, who is getting married to a frigid woman who is seeing the first guy on the side, right?:D Just kidding.

You have to understand where I got confused, though. You made it sound like this guy had power over you in the school context, I wasn't thinking student. However, you have feelings going on there. I get it now. To be honest, if he's just a student, and you're senior, you should be holding more cards than him if he doesn't behave.

I'm not sure how well you can even trust your impression of his wife. How thrilled would you be to hang out with your husband who's not happy and his friends? How would you feel if your hubby had the sort of character where he had a higher sex drive than you, and dealt with that by telling other people that you were 'frigid', and undoubtedly other things of such a nature? It's a given that she knows on some level how things are. Even if she were Adolph Hitler, he's still Mrs. Hitler, which isn't saying much about him. Basically, Mrs. Hitler doesn't kill jews, but she washes the underpants of the guy who does. Do you want to be the person who kissed the person who washed Hitler's underwear? I didn't think so.

I can tell you from experience, when my wife and I had problems, I learned to have 'safe' people to vent with. Safe meaning people that there was zero chance of ever sleeping with. And the temptation during those hard times was there to talk with 'nonsafe' people, but it was exactly that, temptation, and to accept that temptation would have been slimy on my part. This guy failed that temptation. I will shut up about this after this post, I'm just hoping that maybe in the right context, the temptation will be less for you, and the context is 'slimy cheating husband', not 'wronged husband'. Or, more correctly, he's Mrs. Hitler. He's Adolph's chick. He has Hitler's babies. When Hilter says "Who's my b1tch?" He says "I am! I am!"

I just think, ten years from now, you will find it funny how unattractive his luggage is. But then again, ten years from now, you will be even older than Oso, and basically, your sex life will be over. Fortunately, you'll have your kung fu. Bad ass fukien crane, with insane chin na skills and staff work that can kill. That's almost as good as sex. If you're working chainwhip, too, then it's as good as sex.

All right, I'll shut up now. I promise not another word.

GeneChing
01-10-2003, 01:26 PM
Good luck with long fist. Got qi girls should study long fist.

red5angel
01-10-2003, 01:34 PM
eulerfan - I understand where you are coming from. Just because he is an a$$ ;) you still kind of like the guy but the circumstances are hard.
On the whole alone thing, it might not help to say it but I have always thought that being alone is better then settling. Not saying you are, just saying don't let yourself fall into that trap. I'm a guy, and I bet you big money most of the guys on theis board can back me up on the things I am saying about this person. Although we may be individuals we are still human beings and we operate in generally the same set of parameters.
Take the compliments for what hey are EF, you have a lot going for you, don't settle if you don't have to.
As for KC, he is a little slow, he still doesn't get that my Corgi can whup up on his a$$ no problem.....

M_ArtsMargie
01-10-2003, 01:39 PM
We are completly different from men.

Eulerfan***what you can do is reverse psychology. Just pretend that you are obsessive. Call him evey hour, before it gets close. This tells men that you are no longer a challenge.We know how most guys like a challenge. And they will get bored with you. Now I heard that this only works with some men......but in your case....it looks like you can use any advice.
If you have already told the guys no, then they have a problem, and don't respect you. Therefore, completly cut them. Any guy that doesn't respect you or your decision making, means that they have an insecurtiy that can bring you down. Just be careful!

eulerfan
01-10-2003, 02:05 PM
Yeah, let's stop talking about this. For some reason I don't get, ya'll think you have to convince me that this is a situation to be avoided, that I somehow don't understand that and it's making me feel really bad.

Look up 'self-fulfilling prophecy' and SSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHH. ;)

MA, that's a pretty good idea, actually. That's a REALLY good idea. Just go over the top in the other direction. If nothing else, I would become a huge liability. Thanks!

red5angel
01-10-2003, 02:09 PM
"ya'll think..."

I haven't heard a woman say ya'll in so long it almost makes me cry... :) Northerners make fun of a southern accent but I will take a southern accent over the northern accent any day, especially the minnesota accent!

FatherDog
01-10-2003, 02:15 PM
Originally posted by red5angel
On the whole alone thing, it might not help to say it but I have always thought that being alone is better then settling.

...says the guy with a wife and a dog. :D

KC Elbows
01-10-2003, 02:16 PM
I've never heard of the obsessive reverse psychology with a full twisting butterfly before.

Gene, doesn't Jeff Bolt also do fukien Crane, or is it White Crane? I know he does some crane, I keep thinking it's fukien crane.

Red5,
I'm not sure your corgi could whoop far enough up to get to my arse. It's not the dog's fault, really. Certain breeds are just made wimpy for the sole reason that marines like wimpy dogs. Don't feel bad. Patton had a little wimpy dog, too. That didn't stop him from being a good general. It just means he had a wimpy dog. I think you and Patton have a lot in common, don't you?:p :D

Hey, Johnny's a marine as well. Does he have a wimpy dog, too?

EDIT: for the record, I am aware that Patton was not a marine. However, he was a lot like a marine, in that he was tough, and had a wimpy dog. However, unlike a marine, Patton had solid reading skills.:D

red5angel
01-10-2003, 02:26 PM
"...says the guy with a wife and a dog."

LOL! ooops.....

Yes KC, but he was not a marine...... ;)

I bet my corgi could take you and your silly little shepard in no time. I would sya there owuld be alot of screaming and begging of mercy from you KC but you wouldn't have time for either....

"bunny, ball ball"

KC Elbows
01-10-2003, 02:32 PM
...says the guy with a wife and a dog.

Well, he's got a wife. The question is, at some point does a four legged canine cease to qualify for dog status, and instead become some sort of rodent with an out of control thyroid?

Eulerfan,
Oh, didn't anyone tell you? We're puritans. I can't believe it wasn't mentioned before. Sorry, I'll be clearer next time.

Your friend,

Zebediah the Elder

red5angel
01-10-2003, 02:55 PM
Zebediah AKA "KC" is a lunatic stay away from him, he has the devils mark on him!!!!

KC Elbows
01-10-2003, 03:41 PM
That explains why my milk keeps curdling.

M_ArtsMargie
01-10-2003, 03:56 PM
Thank you Gene!

So what is new with you?

M_ArtsMargie
01-10-2003, 04:23 PM
**And on that note, we cue the music***

Ma ma ......mamamama.....:D

Xebsball
01-10-2003, 04:44 PM
this thread sure could use some ching cho

fa_jing
01-10-2003, 05:27 PM
Eulerfan - walk away. It's the only thing you can do that will make you respect yourself, because you will know that you can walk away if something comes up again in your life, which in all likelihood it will. We are surrounded by temptations in this world, especially for men. Someday hopefully you'll be married too, and you don't want this emotional baggage haunting you. Do it for yourself, do it for your future spouse, do it for your future children. The thing is, we all have similar dilemna's and just because you are faithful today, doesn't mean you'll be faithful tomorrow. Do the right thing for it's own sake. I can see that you don't need my advice, yet here it is anyway. There are a million thrills in this life that wouldn't be as damaging. Watch out for subconscious self-destructivism, we all seem to have it. It's probably related to the death wish. You know, the sex and death thing. I'm putting this in Fruedian terms, not because I'm a follower of Freud, rather in the interest of common parlance.
You are who you choose to be. Existence preceeds essence. Peace

M_ArtsMargie
01-10-2003, 05:36 PM
fa_jing***I kind of understand what your saying about the whole walking away thing. Where most people grow up though, walking away is not an option. You need to face the problem. That is how I was taught. Maybe you can enlighten me more on the "just walk away" saying.:)

eulerfan
01-10-2003, 05:53 PM
PEOPLE!!!!

I AM WALKING AWAY!!!

I AM ASKING FOR ADVICE ON THE OFF CHANCE THAT HE CHASES ME WHERE I GO!!!

I don't know how much clearer I can be about this. The subject only came up because I found a new school. Because I'm leaving my old one. Because I'm walking away.
























So, do you think I should walk away?:D

Chang Style Novice
01-10-2003, 05:58 PM
You need to ask Nancy Sinatra what these boots were made for, honey!;)

eulerfan
01-10-2003, 06:00 PM
So, I take it you think he'll leave his wife for me and we'll live happily ever after, then. I'll do it, then.

eulerfan
01-10-2003, 06:05 PM
BTW, your presence in requested in the Attn:Eulerfan thread, CSN.

fa_jing
01-10-2003, 06:07 PM
Eulerfan - I could tell you were walking away, that's why I said that you don't need my advice, I just wanted you to feel the best possible about doing so.

MA margie - you are right, you can't always walk away. Sadly many women and people in general can be in situations where only direct confrontation will solve the problem. OR, direct confrontation may be the morally best road, you know, put people in there place and stuff. Even more sadly, sometimes there's no solution to the problem, period. It just seemed like the best response in THIS particular situation, and generally in terms of the whole marriage thing, I just wanted Eulerfan to realize that this wouldn't be the last tough decision she would have to make, and that it's a good precedent for the rest of her life.

I'm trying not to overgeneralize - there are all kinds of situations and I've made f'd up mistakes in my own life.

Xebsball
01-10-2003, 06:07 PM
oh boy tonight im just this close to tapping again that sharp tight mad state of mind previously displayied by me in the shape of words

Chang Style Novice
01-10-2003, 06:09 PM
Sure! Just because he's a player now, doesn't mean that he'll want to stay a player when he marries someone else. Guys like that always change, and settle down. They never just keep wanting what they don't have no matter how good they've got it where they are. There's never been a recorded case of a pathological cheater and liar who doesn't give a rat's ass about any feelings but his own! That's just a myth.

eulerfan
01-10-2003, 06:12 PM
You're absolutely right! And even if that weren't true, I'm so d@mned special, I'm sure I could get him to change for me. I mean, it's ME for heaven's sake.

Chang Style Novice
01-10-2003, 06:21 PM
That's right! And the fact that he won't take no for an answer now PROVES he respects you.

eulerfan
01-10-2003, 06:24 PM
Oh yeah. He takes me SERIOUSLY!

Chang Style Novice
01-10-2003, 06:33 PM
So, it's decided then. You're doing the right thing by busting up this marriage. Any man of the cloth or ethical social philosopher would say the same.

eulerfan
01-10-2003, 06:42 PM
*tents finger*

eeeeeeeeeexcellent

Chang Style Novice
01-10-2003, 06:43 PM
"Smithers, have the Rolling Stones killed."

"But sir..."

"I said do it!"

KC Elbows
01-10-2003, 09:18 PM
I AM ASKING FOR ADVICE ON THE OFF CHANCE THAT HE CHASES ME WHERE I GO!!!


Then you need to drive faster and take a lot of crazy turns.

Of course, if you'd played enough rpg's, you'd already know that.

Non role players just aren't prepared for gritty reality. I feel sorry for them.

Qi dup
01-10-2003, 10:35 PM
Hey Gene, is there going to be a 2003 hoodie? And if so will the 02 hoodies go on sale?

I like your avatar Margie:)

rubthebuddha
01-11-2003, 12:18 AM
the mind boggles at the possibility that kc actually believes that :D

euler -- i gots a good idear:

breathe. just a little bit. when done, try it again. repeat as necessary. if done right, this can be a BIG help in your problems. :)

SevenStar
01-11-2003, 12:31 AM
What are waitin on? Go break up that happy home already!

eulerfan
01-11-2003, 08:18 AM
I think I'll wait and see if they have kids. That way, when we ultimately marry, I'll have a child without having to give birth, which I hear is painful.

See, timing is everything.

SevenStar
01-11-2003, 10:13 AM
painful? nah, it's a mental thing. Just tell yourself "It's only nine months and a quick push"

TaoBoy
01-12-2003, 05:06 PM
Is anyone writing this stuff down?

My lord, we have some book worthy advice here. Well, maybe an advice column...


Dear KFO,

You see there's this guy and... well can you help me?

Signed,
Ms X.

eulerfan
01-12-2003, 05:45 PM
I'm actually seeing somebody else, right now. He's an MAist so I hope he doesn't stumble onto this board any time soon and discover what a floozy I actually am.

I'm not ready for him to know that just yet.

Xebsball
01-12-2003, 06:15 PM
an essay of goofness, half nudeness, and self-laughing

http://pub7.ezboard.com/fshaolinnorthwestforumfrm30.showMessage?topicID=38 .topic

oh yeah, im that dude that goes by the name of Marcos there, its my real name, you can track me down and then proceed to kill me and family now :D

a full report, a true story of trial in from non existant or non significant to short attemps leading nowhere but yet to be passed down to those about to succed me and stuff

eulerfan
01-12-2003, 06:33 PM
Here's how I deal with such things:

Somebody you find really attractive makes a comment to you or asks you a question and you don't respond well because you are flustered. So, next time, you work up the nerve to make a comment to them or ask them a question. Then, if they respond well, instead of feeling on the spot, you're relieved that it went well. Chat flows better that way.

Try it next time.

nospam
01-12-2003, 08:18 PM
I just read that other thread where youse all been called losers. An advise column..wow...who woulda figured...

nospam.
:cool:

Serpent
01-12-2003, 08:20 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan
I'm actually seeing somebody else, right now. He's an MAist so I hope he doesn't stumble onto this board any time soon and discover what a floozy I actually am.


*looks sadly at jar of loose change that doesn't equal an airfare to Texas yet*

Guess I was just too slow...

*sob*

SevenStar
01-12-2003, 08:24 PM
Cheer up, bud....We've known that you were slow since you first joined KFO

Serpent
01-12-2003, 08:37 PM
Originally posted by SevenStar
Cheer up, bud....We've known that you were slow since you first joined KFO

You lay in wait for me, don't you!

I'm just being melancholy. You watch. When this fling with this guy is all done she'll come back here, begging for further spanks and naughtiness.

And she'll be begging me, big guy. ;)

eulerfan
01-12-2003, 08:49 PM
He's Afrikaans. So his accent is like a mix of British and Australian. Surely, he's a pale subtitute for you, serp.

SevenStar
01-12-2003, 08:52 PM
lol, I think the only thing she'll be begging of you is to leave her alone :)

Serpent
01-12-2003, 09:21 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan
He's Afrikaans. So his accent is like a mix of British and Australian. Surely, he's a pale subtitute for you, serp.

I've never heard Afrikaans described that way before. I think you're reaching! ;)

But you're right on one point, he's certainly a pale substitute for me. Now get yourself across my knee, you saucy little minx!

eulerfan
01-12-2003, 09:46 PM
It's always sounded that way to me.

*climbing on Serpent's lap*

well, Afrikaans is very Dutch. I'm talking about their accent when speaking English.

*leans over knee*

It's probably because the two main sources for learning English are the Brits and the Aussies.

Serpent
01-12-2003, 10:04 PM
I guess I can see that. No offence intended, but I've always considered the Afrikaans accent rather abrasive. Then again, I sound like a Scotsman that was raised in England trying to do a bad imitation of an Australian accent, so who am I to talk!

Anyway, things seem to be getting back to normal here.

*SPANK*

eulerfan
01-12-2003, 10:12 PM
Thank you sir, may I have another

A Norweigian
A Brit
A married man
An Aussie (nod to serpent)
A South African

Raise your hand if you see a pattern.

Serpent
01-12-2003, 10:35 PM
Of course you may.

*SPANK*

I'm seeing a couple of patterns actually:

1) There's a distinct lack of Americans (?? the married guy?)

2) You have a penchant for the exotic (foreign at least, I don't how excotic a Brit is! ;) )

3) You're desperately seeking something...?

eulerfan
01-12-2003, 10:48 PM
The married guy is american.

They are all, ultimately, unavailable. A foreign guy will eventually move home. Don't have to really commit.

Serpent
01-12-2003, 10:51 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan
The married guy is american.

They are all, ultimately, unavailable. A foreign guy will eventually move home. Don't have to really commit.

Ah, right! These guys aren't Norwegian, etc. now living in the US then. In that case, yes indeed, the pattern is obvious.

Hey, if you don't want to commit, then that's fine. It's only a problem if you would like to commit but are scared, therefore choosing people that will eventually leave, etc., etc.

Spank?

Xebsball
01-13-2003, 08:00 AM
aha the pattern is the letter "A"

eulerfan
01-13-2003, 08:38 AM
No Xeb, you got it all wrong. It's the greek letter "delta".

Xebsball
01-13-2003, 08:44 AM
:cool: aight but then i was pretty close

I have options with patterns too, they are unnavalible since im typing right now

Left Hand
Right Hand
Both Hands

Do a backflip who sees a pattern

eulerfan
01-13-2003, 08:58 AM
I've heard of people who use citrus fruit. However, if you have any little cut or abrasion, it must hurt. Especially if you are using grapefruit which seems the most likely choice given its size.

Xebsball
01-13-2003, 09:32 AM
LOL it took me a while to find out what a grapefruit is, two trips to the dictionary and talking to a finnish guy and an american one :D

i think the citric fruits would hurt anyway, since even without cuts the skin of the "head" would be sensitive to the acid i think maybe

M_ArtsMargie
01-13-2003, 10:37 AM
:eek: Why not a lemon?

eulerfan
01-13-2003, 10:58 AM
lol

Margie, that's wrong

Xebsball
01-13-2003, 11:04 AM
the wimmins are trying to damage xebbys peepee :(

SevenStar
01-13-2003, 11:08 AM
they don't have grapefruits in brazil?

dezhen2001
01-13-2003, 11:08 AM
xebs: ur just lucky you are not with one of them! :eek:

dawood

SevenStar
01-13-2003, 11:11 AM
how about a pumpkin? seriously. I heard this story:

A man was in a field, having his way with a pumpkin. A lady cop saw his car parked near the field, and something told her to investigate. Eventually she found the man, still going to town on this pumpkin. When she saw him, she was appaled/amused at the same time. She said "What on earth are you doing?" and the slightly drunk man looked down at the pumpkin and then looked at the officer and said, "d@mn, is it after midnight already?"

Xebsball
01-13-2003, 11:16 AM
grapefruits the dictionary translates to "toranja"
never heard of anything called a toranja, i know laranjas (oranges) though.

i once saw on tv, on a humoristic program some dude was banging a papaya, then it one day became a monster and bit the guys dick :eek:

@PLUGO
01-13-2003, 11:24 AM
"toranja" are indeed Grapefruit in spanish
an Orange is also sometimes called a "chena"

oh and speaking of pumkins . . . (http://atomfilms.shockwave.com/af/content/atom_1189)

GeneChing
01-13-2003, 01:13 PM
margie: Not much new here. Lots of work, as always. How about your side?

qi dup: We will not be doing a 2003 hoody, much as I'd like to get Margie to pose on my knee again (margie & me) (http://store.yahoo.com/martialartsmart/99xmahd15.html) . Sales weren't overwhelming for the 2002 hoody, so we decided not to do another. Since we do all our silkscreening in house, we don't have any back stock for the 2002's - so there will not be a sale. If you really want one, you'd better order now. It'll probably be discontinued soon. And let them know you wanted a 2003 too.

GeneChing
01-13-2003, 01:44 PM
...see now it's really NOT a good idea to get advice on your love life here.

Anyone want some plump, juicy melons? (http://store.yahoo.com/martialartsmart/45-023.html)

p.s. kc - not sure if Master Bolt knows Fukien WC. He was a student of Yang Jwing Ming, who surely wrote a book on WC, but I don't know if Jeff picked up something else beyond that over the years. Ask euler.

Chang Style Novice
01-13-2003, 01:53 PM
One great thing about sex with gourds and melons is you never have any disagreements about anal. Or periods. Or anything, for that matter.

Personally, I prefer raisins.

I mean watermelons! Yeah, watermelons.

Xebsball
01-13-2003, 02:34 PM
you see, it keeps getting more and more dangerous posting here

IronFist
01-13-2003, 02:45 PM
Hey, let's make this thread longer.

Reply number 1822!!!!

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IronFist

TaoBoy
01-13-2003, 02:58 PM
Now, it seems I have missed a few things in the past fews hours (namely some spanking from eulerfan - d@mn that serpent getting all the attention). Anyway, where was I? What happened to Xeb? No wait, I don't wanna know. But maybe try cucumber? Nice and soothing. The ladies dig the cucumber too - and even zucchini to a certain extent. But I digress. Where was I? Oh yes, spanking... now eulerfan - the welts have subsided. Please ma'am - some more...?

:eek: :rolleyes: :p

:D :D :D

KC Elbows
01-13-2003, 03:01 PM
Originally posted by IronFist
Hey, let's make this thread longer.

Reply number 1822!!!!

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IronFist

Not the first time this thread has seen a whole bunch of big o's.

Xebsball
01-13-2003, 03:42 PM
brother love

you guys bro said today:
"Me and girl plus other couple going out, we not taking you cos... huh... 5 cant fit in the car"

:rolleyes:

Serpent
01-13-2003, 04:43 PM
Originally posted by Xebsball
the wimmins are trying to damage xebbys peepee :(

LOL!

:D

M_ArtsMargie
01-13-2003, 05:10 PM
Please........Dont do the pie:eek:

Serpent
01-13-2003, 05:27 PM
Hair pie is ok though, right?

Chang Style Novice
01-13-2003, 05:31 PM
"Please........Dont do the pie"

I prefer the tarts anyway.

Serpent
01-13-2003, 05:36 PM
You are a tart.

Chang Style Novice
01-13-2003, 05:42 PM
No, I am a lamprey who was promoted from proboscis monkey.

Colored belts are so boring, don't you think?

Serpent
01-13-2003, 05:49 PM
After a gruelling test Chang Style Novice advanced from proboscis monkey to lamprey. Let's all give him a well deserved round of applause!

*Clap clap clap*

So it wasn't a swollen rabbit then? How was that thing ever a monkey? Could you attach the original pic?

Chang Style Novice
01-13-2003, 05:53 PM
Not from here, I'm on a library computer. But google up proboscis monkey and be convinced.

Serpent
01-13-2003, 06:00 PM
Originally posted by Chang Style Novice
Not from here, I'm on a library computer. But google up proboscis monkey and be convinced.

S'cool, I'll take your word for it. I just couldn't figure out from your avatar what the hell it was. If you say it was a proboscis monkey, then I believe you. You've never lied to me about monkeys before.

Except that one time with that "girl" from Africa you set me up with. Thousands that cost me in therapy. Thousands!

Chang Style Novice
01-13-2003, 06:04 PM
You gave me no choice. I had to do it. I HAD TO!

Xebsball
01-13-2003, 06:16 PM
Originally posted by Xebsball
you see, it keeps getting more and more dangerous posting here

Now i seriously have to shut up
Know what i just did, picked something from the refrigerator and then rised and turned to the left simultaneously remarkably landing my face on the edge of the door space (cos the door was open, otherwise id hit the door). I got my upper lip and my ****ing upper gum cut!! I CUT MY GUM :mad:

Xebsball
01-13-2003, 06:18 PM
Originally posted by M_ArtsMargie
Please........Dont do the pie:eek:

jealous are you? ;)
:D

id kiss you but im currently bleeding

Serpent
01-13-2003, 07:16 PM
What's wrong with bloody kisses? Surely it's a rejection if the woman refuses to kiss you because you're bleeding? :p ;)

Xebsball
01-13-2003, 07:20 PM
its all good becouse i stopped bleeding now

but Margie is not around

*looks left*
*looks right*

Hmm... i see Serpent is here... if only he was wearing a dress, but no :(

Serpent
01-13-2003, 07:37 PM
Aw, c'mon you chunky Brazilian, pucker up!

eulerfan
01-13-2003, 07:39 PM
Originally posted by Serpent
What's wrong with bloody kisses? Surely it's a rejection if the woman refuses to kiss you because you're bleeding? :p ;)

I'd kiss a bleeding guy. Then again, I'm not a pu$$y.

:p ;) back atcha

Serpent
01-13-2003, 07:42 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan


I'd kiss a bleeding guy. Then again, I'm not a pu$$y.

:p ;) back atcha

Heh heh. Touche, ma petite choux!

Chang Style Novice
01-13-2003, 07:44 PM
My lamprey only kisses the bleeding. If you're not bleeding before, definitely after.

Serpent
01-13-2003, 07:49 PM
Originally posted by Chang Style Novice
My lamprey only kisses the bleeding. If you're not bleeding before, definitely after.

They're special that way.

(Nice sig by the way! ;) )

Chang Style Novice
01-13-2003, 07:53 PM
If you want, Serpent, my lamprey could suck you off.

Do you have health insurance?

Xebsball
01-13-2003, 07:57 PM
Youre all confusing me, more reason for me to spend the time attached to someone elses mouth

Serpent is not pretty like Margie, ill keep saying this
I miss Margie tonite

Serpent
01-13-2003, 07:58 PM
Originally posted by Chang Style Novice
If you want, Serpent, my lamprey could suck you off.

Do you have health insurance?

I'm always up for something I've never tried before.

Health insurance? Pah! That's a safety net for pu$$ies.

Chang Style Novice
01-13-2003, 07:59 PM
Now, this may sting for just a minute...

CHOMP!

Serpent
01-13-2003, 08:08 PM
Oh yeah!

eulerfan
01-13-2003, 08:18 PM
Originally posted by Serpent


Heh heh. Touche, ma petite choux!

is that an idiom?

Chang Style Novice
01-13-2003, 08:20 PM
serpent - Here's a larger view of that lamprey mouth, so there's no missing what you're getting!

eulerfan - I don't think it's neccesary for you to call serpent such a mean name.

eulerfan
01-13-2003, 08:23 PM
He started it.

He called me a cabbage.

Chang Style Novice
01-13-2003, 08:29 PM
and here's a big version of the proboscis monkey you asked for earlier, Serp.

http://www.orangutan.com/images/ProboscisMonkey.jpg

Chang Style Novice
01-13-2003, 08:31 PM
Yes, yes, I know...I'm pretty sure he meant it in a nice way, though.

I used to call one of my girlfriends a cuckoo clock. In a nice way.

Serpent
01-13-2003, 08:44 PM
CSN, is that the same pic as you had in your avatar?! Madness, it looked nothing like that to me. Still, I've said it before, you never lied to me about monkeys in the past. Except that one time....

Eulerfan, it's a term of endearment. Really, it is. Ask crimson phoenix, it's a nice thing to say. So long as you say it in French. I'm guessing it's not so good in English.

Chang Style Novice
01-13-2003, 08:47 PM
That's the same guy, Serpent, although obviously I cropped and shrank him for the avatar.

Boy, he's even cuter in all his glory, ain't he?

Wait, you weren't talking about the angler fish

http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/nova/abyss/life/images/wudep50.jpeg

or the star nosed mole

http://www.nature.com/nsu/010329/images/mole_200.jpg

were you?

eulerfan
01-13-2003, 08:49 PM
Okay, I'll be a french cabbage.

CSN, how big is that thing? Is it just an itty bitty worm?

Chang Style Novice
01-13-2003, 08:53 PM
Lamprey Family (http://www.state.ia.us/dnr/organiza/fwb/fish/iafish/primfish/lampreyf/lampreyf.htm)

"Body size ranges from the small brook lamprey, which rarely exceeds 6 to 7 inches, to the sea lamprey which attains a length of nearly 3 feet."

eulerfan
01-13-2003, 08:55 PM
I know what I'm having nightmares about.

dezhen2001
01-13-2003, 08:55 PM
i hit my head on the edge of a cupboard door last nite as well... got a little dent in it now :( Wasnt even the area of my head im training hard qigong and now the door doesnt close properly :mad:

dawood

Serpent
01-13-2003, 09:01 PM
Originally posted by eulerfan
Okay, I'll be a french cabbage.


Cool. You know I love ya.



CSN, how big is that thing? Is it just an itty bitty worm?

Chang, do up your trousers, will ya!

That star nosed mole is cute!

Chang Style Novice
01-13-2003, 09:08 PM
"Chang, do up your trousers, will ya!"

I thought this was the clothing optional thread.

"CSN, how big is that thing? Is it just an itty bitty worm?"

NO! No, that's just, uh, perspective. You know, foreshortening. A funky angle. It's uh, it's....

I need to be alone with my raisin.

Serpent
01-13-2003, 09:12 PM
I know many chicks that say that size doesn't matter. Of course, they're full of sh!t. You know another one? It's not the size of it, but what you do with it.

"What do want me to do with it, honey?"

"Make it bigger, needled!ck!"

CSN, you're right. This is a clothing optional thread. Let's all frolic naked, just because we can. Come on, I'll start.

*ZZZIIIIIPPPP*

Wahey!