MEN fear and respect you. WOMEN will want to make love to you. This can be yours too.

[rogue]

So who is Victor I hear you ask? Well I can tell you my friend, I am a former male model and current international playboy who earns my money now from stockmarket speculation and property investment. I believe my success is due to my dedication in the way of martial arts. It is my desire to share this with you my friend - please join me on this journey to success, fitness and strength.
(http://groups.msn.com/VictorsMartialArts/welcome.msnw)

[SevenStar]

"Now you should be in you second week. Time to learn how to punch.

Take up the stance demonstrated by one of my lovely students, Chisato, below. Make a fist and punch it straight forwards while twisting it and withdrawing the other hand to your hip.

This is what I call DRAGON PUNCHING as there is no defence for it when performed by a master.

I want you to practice this punch 200 times on each side for one week. At the end of this week your punch will be so strong even stopping the blow one inch before you make contact will knock your enemy backwards."

:rolleyes:

"Have you done all the training so far? Don't go forward without doing as I prescribe or you will be only going backwards to become skinny, ugly, unsuccessful and type of man no women will want. Keep going and you will be sexy, rich, successful guy like me for sure.

Lesson 3 is the "Dragon Choke". This choke is the most secret of all holds and was only taught to the emporer's guards who were specially trained in the art of judo. I risk my life to teach you this as the punishment for revealing it's secret is surely death by the astral judoka.

But my friend I will risk my life to bring this secret to you because your sensei cares about you.

Go behind your opponent and bring your arms around their neck in the manner demonstrated by my lovely student Aiko. Push the head forwards with your left hand as you apply pressure with the right forearm.

No-one can resist this choke.

Your practice for this week is to apply this technique to a 3m x 20cm diameter post at the centre for one hour each day or until the post snaps (which ever comes first)

Good luck with your training friend."

ROFL!!!

[SevenStar]

Check out Lesson 5 the "kata victor" is the most deadly part of his system. If you master it, you will be invincible....It's a kata he made up supposedly...

I remember that kata from my karate days - it's heian yondan - an orange belt kata.

[rogue]

****** Seven, no jumping ahead with the lessons.

Some of the guys on e-budo took this guy seriously.

[Chang Style Novice]

First you are to go here
http://www.judoinfo.com/techjudo.htm
and learn all the techniques of judo. This should take you until Wednesday.


I like this guy already. Much more realistic than Llap Goch or Klingon Martial Arts.

[SevenStar]

yes, you are correct. I need to do the training properly so that I too may become invincible!!!

[rogue]

Sevenstar, you ever post on e-budo? :D

Hello my friend,

I have the pleasure to announce that you will now be able to register yourself as a soke for any new martial arts FOR FREE through my new Soke Registration Service.

Just send to me your request and we can registar your new martial art for free, with the simple addition of a sponser's name.

How does it work?

Well if you want to start a new martial art, such as Daisho Ryu Kenjutsu we simply take that name, add the name of one of our many great sponsers (eg Daisho Pepsi Ryu Kenjutsu) and hey presto .. free registration !!

Now with many soke registration services costing many hundreds of dollars I'm sure you'll find our service easy and convenient.

But that's not all !!!

For a small free we can do a free soke search and register a new budo name for you. Even if you think you may not be ready yet to take the big step and start a new Budo it can pay to reserve the name you want for the future.

We also offer a premium service where we can claim the sokeship for you of many defunct martial arts systems. You could become soke of a budo with a thousand year history !!

So my friend what are you waiting for .....

[dezhen2001]

http://groups.msn.com/VictorsMartialArts/lesson4.msnw

:eek:

http://groups.msn.com/VictorsMartialArts/lesson5thekatavictor.msnw

"Here is the KATA VICTOR .......
This is my creation of all the most deadly strike of karate. If you learn this you WILL be invincible and ALL the sexy womens will want you.

Please remember that this kata is a secret and must not be shown to anyone else.

Now practice this every day for one week (2 ~ 3 hours)"

it's Heian/pinan yondan from Shotokan Karate! He musy be Ankoh Itosu :D

dawood

[SevenStar]

Me? e-budo? umm....no.....really! honest....:(

[Felipe Bido]

Excellent!...girls will love me now! :D

That's what martial arts are made for, right?

[SevenStar]

Royce would choke Victor!

[Felipe Bido]

Victor would choke himself! :D

[PHILBERT]

Victor probably does choke himself.

[Former castleva]

"Royce would choke Victor!"
Really? Quite a strong statement uh...as much as I hate these...
I think he would choke in his food,words or something.

"Don't go forward without doing as I prescribe or you will be only going backwards to become skinny, ugly, unsuccessful and type of man no women will want. Keep going and you will be sexy, rich, successful guy like me for sure."
Now I can see it all,*sheds a tear*
Enlightment is arriving finally and now...

Whatever you guys say,I think he is just misunderstood and a person with honorable intentions.

:o ;)

[Kristoffer]

Funniest page I've seen in like... ten minutes!! :D

[sticky fingers]

Notice: Microsoft has no responsibility for the content featured in this Group

[Budokan]

He's got to be playing this for laughs. Surely he can't be serious???

[Budokan]

Yep, as I suspected, it's a satirical look at fly-by-night MA styles....pretty funny, too.

[SevenStar]

Is it just me, or does the chick in lesson 7 look like jackie chan in a wig?

[NorthernMantis]

Check out lesson number 8!:D :eek: :eek: :eek:

Will I get a cute Asian chic with my sword too?!

[African Tiger]

induced a "spit-take" all over my monitor:


Here is the KATA VICTOR .......
This is my creation of all the most deadly strike of karate. If you learn this you WILL be invincible and ALL the sexy womens will want you.

Please remember that this kata is a secret and must not be shown to anyone else.


HAH HA HA HA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HAHA HA! :D

[Former castleva]

Is that "dragon choke" some kind of a variation of basic "japanese choke" or something? :)

[WinterPalm]

I am sold. I never realized that so many hot asian girls would be after me if I practised martial arts. Wow!!
Oh well, time for three million more dragon punches. When I'm a master nobody will be able to defend themselves from that technique.

[Stacey]

no no no..

You need to get out more...then again its a matter of perception.

If you like pretty asian girls there is a mix here of artistic tastefull ones and dirty ones doing dirty, dirty things

www.uh-oh.com

[Chang Style Novice]

Our Fearless Leader. (http://peoplesforum.com/cgi-bin/forum?233@@.efa84d6/2287!enclosure=.2fce3e19)