The "Qi" come on

[African Tiger]

You're gonna love this, guys. I'm hanging with this girl in her apartment the other day and she's got a sore back. So being the gentleman that I am (:D ) I give her a nice deep tissue massage.

Through the massage, I used Qi to make it more intense. She said she could actually feel vibrations through my fingers and asked me how I was able to do it. I gave her a 1/2 a.s.s. description of Qi, but I don't think I fully or properly explained the concept.

Since this poor little thing has a few back and shoulder problems (:D :D), I will certainly volunteer more deep tissue massages, but how should I explain this concept of Qi in a more "understandable" way? Not that I'm trying to turn our friendship into something else....aw hell, who am I kidding?

[fa_jing]

Just explain to her that you have sublimated your sperm into a living gas and that it is passing through the pores of your fingers and into her body.

She'll love that .:eek: :cool: :D

[Waidan]

That's so much better than anything I can come up with. Go with the gaseous sperm story.

[dnc101]

AT,

-Insert your favorite internal joke-

Seriously, if you've got that kind of Qi control, why do you need a line?

[joedoe]

Just tell her it's your mojo baby yeah! :D

[African Tiger]

You people are nuts. :D I knew I'd get a good laugh out of this post...

Um, not so much a line, but I want to sound at least as if I know wtf I'm talking about, the next time I....rub her down

I could always put on some Barry White and just say, forget about it, baby.

[fiercest tiger]

Bend her over?:D

[KC Elbows]

If memory serves me correctly, the spot between the privates and the anus is called the hui yin. Frankly, all future conversations need to center around this spot, as it's a no lose area. Too high? no such thing. Too low? Not with proper lubrication.

Oh yeah, and respect her as a human being.

[joedoe]

Tell her there is an advanced technique for direct injection of qi. THEN tell her to bend over :D.

Seriously though, just tell her that qi is life force. Through your training you have developed a certain degree of control over it and can use it for healing purposes.

Simple :)

[SifuAbel]

Line: I have refined my chi to a silky smoothness, and it makes great facial cream too. :D

[Laughing Cow]

Easiest way to explain it I found is as follows:

Qi/Chi/Ki = Bio Energy/ Vital Essence.

Just my 0.2 cents worth.

[African Tiger]

Well I think I will use joedoe's explanation. That' will keep me from getting a sharp kick to the groin :(

She's a tough little cookie - did stunts at Universal Studios Florida. She's also a devout Christian, so that hui yin spot is a ways off.

But she's such a doll, I can wait....hell, I had to learn to meditate to get my qi so strong, I may as well wait for her.

Thanks for the entertaining responses!

[Qi dup]

Just say, "The qi you speak of comes from my magical man-gina baby. Oh yeah!"

[fiercest tiger]

ask her if she likes it in the deaf and dumb or the rusty drain pipe?


LOL also she will feel it alot more when you spank her a$$ and spit on her cake hole saying you like that b!tch dont you!:eek: hahahahhahahahahahah ive watched way to much porn and been in to many porn movies.


:D ft

[Serpent]

Yeah right, FT. Like you'd ever be cast in a porn movie! Maybe as the fluffer, if you're lucky! ;)

AT, you're missing the one obvious option. She asks about this strange thing called qi, you reply, 'I could tell you, baby, but then I'd have to kill you.'

Instant man of mystery! :)

[The Willow Sword]

You need to play an Issac hayes song from the 80's when you say this:
" Well baby,,,,,Its hard to understand,,,,,and,,,,,if you let me play this classic tune,,,,,,it will explain it all to you baby.
(play the issac hayes song) and dance around and lipsink.

TRUST ME man,,,,,,she will go wild and that moral chastity belt she is wearing will be ripped off quite willingly.

go for it man,,,,,,,,,,,,,

[dezhen2001]

everyone seems more excited than you are :D

dawood

[Stacey]

take her pulse and look concerned

tell her her gall bladder meridian is blocked and then bring your hand down her chest in an alloof professional way.

Put your hand on her dan tien and chi up your hands so she can feel the heat.

tell her that her energy center is cold and needs to be boosted.


Then give her a jing injection to the dan tien that will cause fire breath and open up the ground chi which will make her legs shake and her back arch. its all part of the procedure.


To answer you question, yes I've used the qi come on and yes it works.

More than that I use it to open my qua and have sex as long as I want to. Thats even better.


now i'm trying to figure out how to get some osmotic equilibrium with chi. I've read the yellow emperor classic, I only date girls with good chi and I can do chi kung with the girl to the benefit of us both. Good stuff. make super happy fun time.

[FatherDog]

Go with the simple yet suave.

"I'm good with my hands, baby."

[eulerfan]

Originally posted by African Tiger
Well I think I will use joedoe's explanation. That' will keep me from getting a sharp kick to the groin :(

She's a tough little cookie - did stunts at Universal Studios Florida. She's also a devout Christian, so that hui yin spot is a ways off.

But she's such a doll, I can wait....hell, I had to learn to meditate to get my qi so strong, I may as well wait for her.

Thanks for the entertaining responses!

From these two pieces of information about her, I would suggest you avoid words like 'lifeforce' or 'bioenergy' or mystical sounding stuff. I would go the pragmatic route. Stick with the simple words like 'energy' or 'breath'. "Chi is the energy in your body and, with a lot of practice, you can learn to control it."

I think you should be careful about coming off as too much of an airy-fairy-oowow-eastern-magic-granola-head kind of person. If she's not familiar with these ideas, you may sound that way to her.

[Former castleva]

Hmmm...
If you´d like,you could talk about reiki (divine energy,so to speak) that might be more applicable for a christian (but it is not,it is a japanese method and far away from that massage)
Why do not you just tell her how it is,may she either accept it or not.Proven methods,clever medicine...


:cool:

[joedoe]

Originally posted by eulerfan


From these two pieces of information about her, I would suggest you avoid words like 'lifeforce' or 'bioenergy' or mystical sounding stuff. I would go the pragmatic route. Stick with the simple words like 'energy' or 'breath'. "Chi is the energy in your body and, with a lot of practice, you can learn to control it."

I think you should be careful about coming off as too much of an airy-fairy-oowow-eastern-magic-granola-head kind of person. If she's not familiar with these ideas, you may sound that way to her.

Are you suggesting that she won't be open-minded enough to handle that? :)

Seriously though, if AT can't use a term like 'lifeforce' in his explanation of what qi is, then maybe she isn't the right one for him. If she can't respect what AT trains and practices, then maybe he is better off not knowing her?

[straight blast]

She said she could actually feel vibrations through my fingers

Dude there's your answer right there. Just think of all the money she could save on batteries!

Man you would have her begging for more...:D

[eulerfan]

joe,

My point here is kind of subtle. I guess I'm not making it that well. A word like 'lifeforce' is not very well defined. You are converying a vague idea, not a solid concept. When people are vague, you have a tendency to wonder if they know what they are talking about.

Now, I don't think it's a value judgement about her. There are some REALLY weird philosophies and religions out there. People are wary as a result.

One time, I met this guy at a bar and, without telling me what religion he was, he kept saying, "In my religion, we........"

Nothing he said raised a red flag but, just because he was being vague, I was thinking, "The second this guy tells me he's a scientologist, I'm outa here!"

Turned out he was Buddhist. I don't know why he was being so vague. But it's just suspicious when people do that.

That's why I would suggest being as clear and solid as possible in explaining.

From what I've seen, I don't imagine Africa Tiger would want a woman who would get all starry eyed and mystified easily.

Know what I mean?

[joedoe]

Fair enough.

I think people are vague about their beliefs because they know that a lot of people are intolerant of other religions. I know that I tend not to talk about my personal beliefs that much because I have had the experience that people just dismiss you out of hand because what you believe does not fall into their definition of the truth.

Put it this way - it nearly led to me breaking up with my partner because she could not accept my personal beliefs. We have both learned the we should just stay away from the subject. But as a result of this I tend not to discuss my personal beliefs with people, and if they ask I am very vague.

I agree that you must be wary of cults, however this can easily be fixed by simply asking the person what religion they follow.

As long you're not a scientologist, then no one really has anything to worry about do they? :D

[rubthebuddha]

euler has the right idea, and joe doe does too -- keep it simple. even if she understands you, an explanation on the innermost workings of chi will make her go from zero to snooze in 5.1 seconds. if you like her, give her a taste. if she likes what she tastes, give her more. that sounds soooo bad, and i know serpent is going to run with it, but hey, it's the right idea.

[Stacey]

impress and then retreat

This is the way of knocking at the jade gate.

[SifuAbel]

Or just say Chi comes from jesus.

I grew up in parochial schools. Anything that comes from jesus leads to extreme sex.

[Serpent]

Originally posted by rubthebuddha
if you like her, give her a taste. if she likes what she tastes, give her more. that sounds soooo bad, and i know serpent is going to run with it, but hey, it's the right idea.

Must... resist... temptation....!