friday
04-01-2003, 03:25 AM
This is really a personal matter of mine. b i feel like talking about it here so thats what i'm doing. recently, i'd been trying to contact two of my friends all three of us learnt at the same kwoon. I was trying to contact them to catch up with them and see how they were. For some reason my calls weren't answered, returned, messages were sent or left with no reply. calls were cut off. intially i thought it must've been just bad luck but after this happened a few times i began to think something mite be wrong.
eventually i saw one of my friends online on one of thsoe messenger things. i sent him messages asking him what was goingon etc. expecting some perfeclty rational reason behind it. what followed was one of the most frustrating and stupid conversations ever. I didn't really get straight answers felt i was more interrogated than anything else. In summary this is approx how it went:
Me: whats wrong?
Him: i don't really know how to talk to u about this so i've been consulting other materials to see how to approach u
Me: what?????????
Him: why haven't u been coming to the kwoon??
Me: uni, hurt my shoulder, etcetc.
Him: after all the things i've done for u. u didnt tellme sifu sent u to learn in hk kung fu of this style...etc
Me: he didn't send me i was going on holidays anyway but i asked him whether i could go learn from this guy. and he said yes
Him: sigong said he thought u were sent by sifu
Me: misunderstanding i think (facts: while i was in hk i only spoke with sigong once or twice max - the time i remember the most was when we had yum cha in macau. i never once lied and told him that sifu sent me etc. the bulk of that conversation took place between my sifu in hk and sigong over the phone in my hk sifu's office while i was waiting outside - i was perfectly honest when interviewed by my hk sifu b4 he accepted me as his student. i didnt say i was sent by australia sifu to learn from him but that i did ask his permission etc).
Him: u so embarrassed to see sigong u looked like a kid caught with his hand in the candy jar/biscuit jar??( i can't remember lol).
Me: (i'm thinking what??????? this is sooo stupid) what??? gosh i was just feeling a bit embarrassed cos it'd been two years since i met him i was thinking he probably wouldn't remember me.
Him: said something about my performances or something in singapore being Australian rep of the style. (i think he means i'm telling everyone i'm the rep from australia for the style etc and lording over ppl???? - he isn't very clear i'm sorry)
Me: i can't remember, i'm not the one doing announcements and it was 2 years ago.
(now that i've had time to think over it - in the competition in hk i participated in yes they even referred me as sifu lol i have a certificate for participating and helping and as the style rep in that competititon from Australia. my hk sifu and i had a chat about that b4 the comp - i said i'm not to that level yet etc. the idea was i'm the australian rep of the style under him (hk sifu) when doing routine demonstrations at functions i went to for the style and the competition - my trophies i can take back to australia and add to the trophies at the school - my hk sifu thought it doesn't matter it will make my australia sifu and classamtes happy that i brought it back like representing them in hk. i had asked what if they didnt like it - he said its still ok i'm representing him then his rep in Australia. the stupid thing was it was a really small technical thing - i never for one second thought iw as the australian representative over all my classmates etc :rolleyes: . plus the comp was filmed as part of a movie so calling me sifu probably makes the movie look more impressive.)
Him: i'm sick of hearing u talk about other styles, sifus, etcetcetc
Me: (i'm thinking o...k sounded like he was fishing for something to support his decision of opinions after i already rejected all his other accusations)
cant we just be friends stuff the martial arts things etc
Him: what we gonna talk about - can't u see i don't believe anything u say?
Me: :rolleyes: i can only take responsibility for things i have done, not the other things i haven't.
One other thing he also mentioned was whether i beat up this guy we both know. lol that part i mentioned in another thread b4. the guy who turns out to be a snake. as i made it quite clear there no i didn't beat him up just when we were mucking around once he threw a punch at me and i threw him to the ground. he wa not injured, just in that exchange he was in the worse off position. this took place b4 i found out he was an idiot and snake. my friend's gf i think was there that nite to see, so was my cousin and one of the senior instructors. i'm sure they would all agree i didn't 'beat up' anyone.
anyway how frustrating and mad did this make me feel? i'm guilty till proven innocent. as my friends they dont talk to me b4 making their stupid incorrect judgements. they treat me like trash - refusing to talk to me etc. and the stupid thing is they seem to see what they want to see...and won't believe anything is ay. so thats how two what i thought were solid friendships have ended. i have never b4 been so disappointed with ppl b4. they have been a major let down. ppl who i thought knew what kind of person i was - totally do not know me.
i wanted to have this rant becos its so **** unfair. its so frustrating to have friends accuse u of things u didnt do. having to cop the cold shoulder fromppl u once thought of as good friends/brothers. but watever happens. i won't bow down to false accusations. and i certainly think the way they handled it ws so childish and immature of ppl thier ages. anyway rants over. good riddance to firends who don't trust u and treat u guilty until proven innocent - when u don't even talk to them theres not much chance of that happening.
:mad:
eventually i saw one of my friends online on one of thsoe messenger things. i sent him messages asking him what was goingon etc. expecting some perfeclty rational reason behind it. what followed was one of the most frustrating and stupid conversations ever. I didn't really get straight answers felt i was more interrogated than anything else. In summary this is approx how it went:
Me: whats wrong?
Him: i don't really know how to talk to u about this so i've been consulting other materials to see how to approach u
Me: what?????????
Him: why haven't u been coming to the kwoon??
Me: uni, hurt my shoulder, etcetc.
Him: after all the things i've done for u. u didnt tellme sifu sent u to learn in hk kung fu of this style...etc
Me: he didn't send me i was going on holidays anyway but i asked him whether i could go learn from this guy. and he said yes
Him: sigong said he thought u were sent by sifu
Me: misunderstanding i think (facts: while i was in hk i only spoke with sigong once or twice max - the time i remember the most was when we had yum cha in macau. i never once lied and told him that sifu sent me etc. the bulk of that conversation took place between my sifu in hk and sigong over the phone in my hk sifu's office while i was waiting outside - i was perfectly honest when interviewed by my hk sifu b4 he accepted me as his student. i didnt say i was sent by australia sifu to learn from him but that i did ask his permission etc).
Him: u so embarrassed to see sigong u looked like a kid caught with his hand in the candy jar/biscuit jar??( i can't remember lol).
Me: (i'm thinking what??????? this is sooo stupid) what??? gosh i was just feeling a bit embarrassed cos it'd been two years since i met him i was thinking he probably wouldn't remember me.
Him: said something about my performances or something in singapore being Australian rep of the style. (i think he means i'm telling everyone i'm the rep from australia for the style etc and lording over ppl???? - he isn't very clear i'm sorry)
Me: i can't remember, i'm not the one doing announcements and it was 2 years ago.
(now that i've had time to think over it - in the competition in hk i participated in yes they even referred me as sifu lol i have a certificate for participating and helping and as the style rep in that competititon from Australia. my hk sifu and i had a chat about that b4 the comp - i said i'm not to that level yet etc. the idea was i'm the australian rep of the style under him (hk sifu) when doing routine demonstrations at functions i went to for the style and the competition - my trophies i can take back to australia and add to the trophies at the school - my hk sifu thought it doesn't matter it will make my australia sifu and classamtes happy that i brought it back like representing them in hk. i had asked what if they didnt like it - he said its still ok i'm representing him then his rep in Australia. the stupid thing was it was a really small technical thing - i never for one second thought iw as the australian representative over all my classmates etc :rolleyes: . plus the comp was filmed as part of a movie so calling me sifu probably makes the movie look more impressive.)
Him: i'm sick of hearing u talk about other styles, sifus, etcetcetc
Me: (i'm thinking o...k sounded like he was fishing for something to support his decision of opinions after i already rejected all his other accusations)
cant we just be friends stuff the martial arts things etc
Him: what we gonna talk about - can't u see i don't believe anything u say?
Me: :rolleyes: i can only take responsibility for things i have done, not the other things i haven't.
One other thing he also mentioned was whether i beat up this guy we both know. lol that part i mentioned in another thread b4. the guy who turns out to be a snake. as i made it quite clear there no i didn't beat him up just when we were mucking around once he threw a punch at me and i threw him to the ground. he wa not injured, just in that exchange he was in the worse off position. this took place b4 i found out he was an idiot and snake. my friend's gf i think was there that nite to see, so was my cousin and one of the senior instructors. i'm sure they would all agree i didn't 'beat up' anyone.
anyway how frustrating and mad did this make me feel? i'm guilty till proven innocent. as my friends they dont talk to me b4 making their stupid incorrect judgements. they treat me like trash - refusing to talk to me etc. and the stupid thing is they seem to see what they want to see...and won't believe anything is ay. so thats how two what i thought were solid friendships have ended. i have never b4 been so disappointed with ppl b4. they have been a major let down. ppl who i thought knew what kind of person i was - totally do not know me.
i wanted to have this rant becos its so **** unfair. its so frustrating to have friends accuse u of things u didnt do. having to cop the cold shoulder fromppl u once thought of as good friends/brothers. but watever happens. i won't bow down to false accusations. and i certainly think the way they handled it ws so childish and immature of ppl thier ages. anyway rants over. good riddance to firends who don't trust u and treat u guilty until proven innocent - when u don't even talk to them theres not much chance of that happening.
:mad: