OT: RAPFANS STRICTLY...Critique this Night-Writer track

[diego]

http://www.soundclick.com/bands/8/prizmmusic.htm

Peep this track: Prizm, DJ D-Rec - Night Writer (FULL) Lyrics

It's the first in the link. My boy D-rec (who is 23 and has been making beats for about 6 months, and been a dj for about 5 years) just started working with this oriental Prizm kid, who's like 16, and a upcoming vancouver b.c. m.c.
I like this track, meaning it's better then i thought it would be, as my boy gives all his best beats to me. They both from vancity, my boy met prizm online and hooked up in the physical like last month, and my boy and possibbly two other dudes in my crew prolly going to produce this prizm kids album.......so for real, give me your honest opinion on this track so I can tell my boy yall feeling it; or call yall bit*hes behind your screens if you ain't feeling it.......I don't know why yall wouldn't like this, beats chill, and the kid sounds cool!.
peace and don't sleep

[Water Dragon]

Tight beat, I liked it. The kid can flow.

[Starchaser107]

ok , the vocals are flat , if the mc added more variations to his delivery it would be excellent, other than that , he can flow. it just seemed as if he was reading it rather than feeling it. i like the vibe though, and the nice & smooth scratch samples very cool.

[Golden Arms]

Yeah..the beats are good, the MC has skills, but he sounds like a less unique ver. of Guru to me. He needs to fine tune a bit but he has the raw potential for sure..

[Shaolin-Do]

Pretty tight,
a couple pops and clicks that sound forge will take out...
Maybe a little more on background sounds, the scratching is pretty tight.
All in all, id say its good, they have definate potential. :)

[Shaolin-Do]

Btw, could you do me a big favor and find out what he used to make the beats?
(hardware, software...)
Had pretty clean drum samples. thats where most mainstreamers f*ck up a good song....
:)
Maybe change the snare a little tho... snare drum sets the entire mood of your song... :)

[diego]

SD, I think he uses either acid or protools, i'l find out!.
Thanks for the replys you guys, wheres sevenstar, chang novice and serpent etc...44 peeps peeped this...lazy fux:mad: :p

Goldenarms, interesting about the guru mention...i'ma look into that thanks.

Starchaser, I get what you mean by flat vocals, but would you breakdown points you weren't feeling; so i can conjure up tips for the kid. This is his first official track= most of prizms work before my boy hooked him up sounds like attic material... this track was mastered at my boys buddys home studio over like a 500$ mic in canadian currency etc so the kid was blessed, and my crew is amped to work with him just for something to do:D .
peace

[diego]

XEBS You listen to rap don't you........gotta be more then a handfull of dudes on this forum that can share they authorithai:cool:

[dwid]

Well, here's my honest opinion.

All the bells and whistles are there. The DJ has some skill, obviously. The kid flows pretty well, but needs to emote a bit more.

Finally, lyrically, this just doesn't cut it. I'm a bit biased because the rap I listen to is mostly underground stuff that is very voice and lyrics driven. These lyrics just seemed so mediocre. I understand, the kid is like 16, so his vocabulary will substantially improve over time most likely. I'm curious to see what he sounds like in 5 years.

[Shaolin-Do]

Yeah... Sorry but I gotta agree with dwid on that one.
He has fairly good rythm and timing, but the lyrics themselves... leave something to be offered.
The first time I listened to it, I isolated the beat. (tend to do that, I produce hip hop as well) Give the kid a rhyme dictionary, make him battle people. Give it till the end of summer and he should be fairly better....
My current M.C. sounded pretty bad at 16... but at 20 He pretty much never loses any of the freestyle competetions around here... bad ass m.c. all 3 of them... :)
Ill try and get some of my music on here for you too...