Book Review

[Oso]

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/bookSearch/isbnInquiry.asp?sourceid=00394776247435733060&ISBN=0787212423&bfdate=05-20-2003+23:07:38

[Serpent]

If you want to know what Shaolin Do kung fu is all about, then go take a class. Grandmaster Sin is quite possibly the largest source of forms and information on kung fu, even knowing forms that are thought to have been lost in china. So if you wish to learn the most comprehensive form of kung fu, you found it.


Ahahahahahaaaa!

Priceless!

[joedoe]

Very defensive aren't they. But I guess if my art were constantly having sh!t put on it I'd be a bit defensive too. Oh well, I have decided to try and stop bashing SD because some of the guys here who practice it seem to show a good attitude.

[Serpent]

Originally posted by joedoe
Very defensive aren't they. But I guess if my art were constantly having sh!t put on it I'd be a bit defensive too. Oh well, I have decided to try and stop bashing SD because some of the guys here who practice it seem to show a good attitude.

Sure, but it's still a cobbled together piece of crap based on lies and $$$'s.

I think we should do all we can to push those people towards real CMA's and then let them decide for themselves.

Stop bashing SD?! I don't think so! ;)

[joedoe]

I know, it can be fun :). But I have found that a few of the SD people here are polite enough so I decided that I would give them a break.

[Serpent]

Sure, I don't hold anything against them. I'm sure a large majority of people in SD are decent people that want to train hard and get good and are really cool people. It's not their fault if they don't realise that their art is a sham. It's up to us, and others that are informed, to tell them that and then let them decide. If they then choose to stay in SD anyway, at least it's an informed decision.

A bloody silly one, but informed nonetheless!

And it's fun to bash SD, so stop peeing on my fireworks, buddy! ;)

[joedoe]

Fire away. Just let me know when so I can be a spectator :D

[Serpent]

I'll keep you well informed.

;)

[PHILBERT]

What I wonder is why they continue to wear the Gi. Ok, so lets assume the story of Japan is true, etc. But before that, they did NOT have the Gi. So they should drop the gi and use a traditional Chinese uniform.

[Fred Sanford]

they can't even seem to get their stories staight, the ******* in the review mentions japan, but I've seen it on a shaolin-do website that the art spent some time in indonesia.

so which one is it? indonesia or japan? or both? or neither?

[Oso]

I was hoping to hear from Sin The' himself since he's haunting the board. ;)

[Royal Dragon]

Personally, I'd like to know why there are so many that feel the need to make up such crazy "Wack'aMole" stories to run thier schools anyway.

I Mean, ther's at leas a half dozen "Schools" that have some sort of large scale deception going on. SD is just the biggest, but by far not the worst. Infact, compared to some, they are rather harmless.

Look at me, I have a relatively boring and unimpressive history, yet I never have problems landing contract with the PK. Dists or athletic clubs and such. If a Schmo like me can do it being honest about my lack luster history, why do these other guys feel the need to create fantastic "Alice in Wonderland" histories out of Thin Air for themselves to be sucsessful?

I think it's really bizzar. I mean, you don't see High school principals doing this, nor do you see too many people in regular life period making such bizzar and over blown claims. It's not like any of these schools are bigger than normal super sized schools who prmote themselves in a legit way or anything. It's not like they have much to gain by doing it.

Really, I mean there are perfectly legit Taiji, Hsing I and Bagua Sifu's out there, claiming they are really teaching some near lost super secret style of the long dead Emperors, when they could do just as well being honest about being Taiji, Hsing I and Bagua Sifus........................I just don't get it :confused:

[KC Elbows]

Sin The has nothing next to a traditional master of kalari do.

Kalari Do would whoop it up on shaolin do, judo chuan, and anyone else.

That's because it's like 32000 years old. It was preserved by an obese albino with a spastic colon named Glurk in the early years of the roman occupation of Manchuria. The Manchurians formed secret Lowtuss Societies in order to fight the romans, and all the greatest masters got together to form Kalari Do and fight those nasty romans of 32000 years ago, frankly the worst era of romans ever. Of them all, the best was Glurk, and he taught Kalari Do much as it is taught today, to invalids and other obese albinos, because they needed to defend themselves most from the romans, who liked to cage them up and put them in travelling freak shows.

In fact, that shaolin do grandmaster with all the hair wanted to learn kalari do, but he was turned down, despite having an intermittently spastic colon.

Just let me know if y'all have any more questions. I understand that you live in ignorance of the power of kalari do, and likely don't understand the little symbols beaming forth from your monitor, but I will try to divest you of your ignorance, vast though it may be.

Such is the path of the kalari do master.

Did someone toot?

[KC Elbows]

Sorry, disregard my last question. It was me.

[SaMantis]

I can't critique Shaolin-Do or the contents of the book since I haven't seen either, but ...

what's up with the picture on the cover? Is he about to fall off the rock or something?

dam, KCElbows, that smells. :eek: :D

[KC Elbows]

That smell is the power of kalari do.

[Chang Style Novice]

Even Kalari Do is no match for the primal, feral power and fury of Five Evil Genius Cartoon Animal Style!

For those of you who may have forgotten, that's Wai Li Koy O Te (desert wolf style), Mojo Jojo Monkey Kung Fu (found at Mojo Jojo Dojo's in strip malls everywhere), Shere Kahn Fu Quan, and Zorak Tang Lang.

We are currently accepting applications from qualified martial artists for the Fifth Evil Genius Cartoon Animal Style.

[KC Elbows]

Clearly, CSN has learned his cartoon animal style from a teacher who either did not entrust him with the full lineage, or did not know it, as that is the only possible explanation for CSN's total ignorance of the fact that ALL animals, cartoon or otherwise, come from Kalari Do.

Let me explain in simple terms for the martial peasants who frequent these sorts of places.

The third Kalari Do grandmistress, Lady Ho, came upon a snake in the woods fighting a lemur. Copying the quick, darting strikes of the snake taught Lady Ho how to kill, and copying the running, jerking as it's rump got bitten motions of the lemur, taught her how to die with honor. And thus was born the first animal styles, around the time when the first asians were appearing.

Lady Ho taught these primordial and primitive asians what she had developed, but they could never understand the sublime method of the lemur, so she created 987 other animal styles before the final lemur lesson. Then, nearly 67 centuries before the first cartoon, Lady Ho made the cartoon animal styles, both genius and otherwise.

And thus TWICE have I spoken to you lesser beings, despite the great assurance that you can do little more than stare at the screen and dribble at all the marvelous colors.

Have a nice day.

[Chang Style Novice]

You're just jealous cuz there's no such thing as an evil cartoon genius lemur.

[KC Elbows]

You're right. Hanna Barbera folded before they made the evil cartoon genius lemur a reality, with their never completed(or started) pilot, "The Evil Cartoon Genius Lemur", with voice over to be done by Casey Casum and Carol Chaning.

[MasterKiller]

You think BN has some reviews? Look at all 77 on Amazon:

here (http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/0787212423/ref=cm_cr_dp_2_1/104-3553677-6618308?v=glance&s=books&vi=customer-reviews)

[KC Elbows]

The same review is in both places.

Basically, someone spammed the book reviews with testimonials. How less than surprising.

A kalari do practitioner would never do that, because our books are kept secret.

However, I must say that I've been practicing kalari do for twenty years, and I've never felt better! Kalari do cured my bursitis, in fact, KALARI DO GAVE ME BURSITIS JUST TO CURE IT. Amazing!

[5thBrother]

To all the skeptics out there, did you know Grandmaster The has a statue at the Shaolin temple?
Put up by the Abbot as his recognition of Grandmaster The's authenticity? Did you know the older
monks at Shaolin stand in awe and amazement as Shaolin-do students perform fighting forms they
haven't seen in years? Did you know that Shaolin-do has stone tablets at most of the Shaolin
temples in China? Would they let a Tae Kwon Do guy show up out of no where and put up a statue
or tablet outside their temple doors? Do you think they would do these things lightly? ENOUGH
SAID. Buy the book, folks, you may learn something...


WHAT DA...!!!

[Royal Dragon]

If I'm ot mistaken, TKD DOES have a tablet at Shaolin.

I think that pailes in comparisent to KC's style though. I'm trying to sell my Beemer to pay for Lessons as we speak!!! :eek:

[MasterKiller]

Beemer? Lucky Bastad!

He wanted my left nut to train me. :(

He said in order to become a disciple, I would have to be like Monk Hui Ke and cut off my nut so that the transmissions would be received properly. That is why Kalari Do people bow with their right nut.

[KC Elbows]

That's right, MasterKiller joined right before our last mountain oyster BBQ.

[Royal Dragon]

Yeah, he told me the same thing. I'm thinking since I already have Kids, and I don't want to pay for a vasectomy anyway, I'm going for the duell Nut sacrafice. That way I get to become the Cheif 36th Generation Inheritor and boss the Newbies around. :D

[Serpent]

Originally posted by Royal Dragon
Yeah, he told me the same thing. I'm thinking since I already have Kids, and I don't want to pay for a vasectomy anyway, I'm going for the duell Nut sacrafice. That way I get to become the Cheif 36th Generation Inheritor and boss the Newbies around. :D

And growing b!tch tits will just be a bonus.

[Royal Dragon]

Hey, easy now. if I do the Duell nut sacrifice, then that's money I don't have to spend on a vascectomy, and then I can put it towards more lesson payments.

[Serpent]

Yeah.

And growing b!tch tits will just be a bonus.

[Mr Punch]

Anyone who cares should go and put a 'no' for 'was this review helpful' next to the reviews that praise this book.

And no, I haven't read it :eek::D, but I've seen enough of this guy's nonsense!

It's a matter of principle: they've spammed the review pages with their blind dull ****witted badly-written garbage, then they've spammed the opinions of the people who disagree... every review that disagrees has a 'This review was useful' to 1 out 19546 people' whereas every one that agrees is surprise surprise, 'useful'!

Just say 'NO'!:D

[Chang Style Novice]

A relevant article from another source. (http://onion.com/onion3919/report_majority_of_human.html)

[Shaolin-Do]

hadnt trolled on SD for a while and was missing it eh?
My shoulder may be ready and I still dont have health insurance for my knee.
That means... I may get to go kick some of ur arses in taiji legacy :)