Fighting psychology

[Strangelove]

Is it possible to avoid 100% of all bar fights , the "hey what you looking at" type of fight..

Lets say I had no balls at all and I would say anything just not to fight would it be possible to avoid almost all of those kind of fights?Like "If you touch me I am calling the police" or I make fun of myself and stuff so they stop bothering me...

Something I find interesting is that males in group tend to behave like monkeys , seriously I was walking down the street the other day and three guys were on the other side and one of them started screaming and the other two were moving sort of like when we see primates getting excited in those monkey documentary.

These people are not looking for a fight but more for a feeling of superiority , if you make them feel superior in theory they should leave you alone right?Like if I dont stand up for myself and make them feel much better than me will they stop with their "hey what u looking at"


Thanks :D

[Morpheus]

Unfortunately the answer is no. You can avoid 99.99% of fights by backing down, but sometimes someone's just looking for a fight and you can't avoid it. For example: I was at a taxi rank a couple of years ago trying to get home and there was a bloke in front of us waiting with his GF. Someone walked up behind him and hit him in the back of the head. The bloke turned round, obviously dazed and said "What the **** did you do that for?". The attacker then proceeded to hit him a few more times, knock him down and then started kicking him before a few of us managed to pull him off. The two men never knew each other, had never met or made eye contact. The attacker was later caught and when questioned by the magistrate his response: "I'd just had a fight with my girlfreind and just wanted to nail someone". That was reported in the court pages weeks later.
So that's one fight that couldn't have been avoided by backing down, but they're thankfully rare.

One observes the survivors and learns from them.
Frank Herbert

[Strangelove]

that is pretty bad indeed! If that happened to me I wouldnt know how to react...it might be a case of mistaken identity but when the guy hits you its already to late to ask and if he didnt bother to be exactly sure who you were then you shouldnt hesitate to defend yourself either.


For example , the other day I was at this video club thats owned by a 25 year old and his 20 year old friend.....all the kids around my place hang out there and play videogames against one and another.It was 5:30 pm and it was pretty dark outside and there were 8 of us playing/watching people play a game if streetfighter. Anyways , this guys comes in and says that he lost his cellphone , the guy was in a leather jacket , had a bronze necklace.......you know the kind of person that wants to look tough by scaring a bunch of 14 years old.Anyways , he said he left his cell phone there....the clerck checked the lost&found and checked the place where he might misplaced it but no he didnt find it , so now the "guy" begins telling my friend at the counter to do his job and that he better find the cellphone , he also wanted to get everyones phone number that came in that day , my friend refused saying it wasnt their responsability and it was private information. Anyways at this point one of the "guy" friend comes in the store with his own cell phone , leather jacket , baggy pants , gold chains and yankees baseball cap.....lol , hes just standing there as if to intimidate us hehe.I told the first guy that he should call his cell phone service and ask if they could do triangulation and they might find it but no.....it wasnt HIS problem lol. Anyways they both went back to their little tiny mazda and left , I dont know if they came back but its funny to watch these guys thing they are tough because they come in a videogame store.They tried to make the impression they were in organized crime or something but judging by the car they were driving I highly doubt it lol. Anyways my adrenaline was pumping and I just hate these type of guys so I wouldnt have mind if this had been my first fight ;) but I of course prefer a peacefull conclusion.

Anyways that was my little story


:D

[8stepsifu]

Read up on some primatology. Scratching you head and agreeing with them when they say your gay will get you out of most trouble. But thats omega male stuff. Thats why we do MA. Sure all the spiritual stuff, but also to kick ass. Kenpo does lots of mental distraction for actual "Self defense" But thats the primate equivalent of letting them mount you and pump away. Just as sticking your finger in someone's face to scold them is the same thing as dominant male chimps sticking their boner in another chimps face to make them submissive. In high school I watched a Discover Channel show on Primate posturing. The next day, some wannabee baddass/ streetfighter knew I did kung fu and wanted to fight. I streched and yawned in the sun and said, "Ok" His lower back was shaking and he backed down.
1.I showed my teeth by yawning
2. I was relaxed and exposed my chest, showing him I wasn't afraid to get hit and that he wasn't a threat. I was very content from being in the sun and would have been just as ok fighting. (Thats doaism for ya)
3.I also had my hands in the air in fists as I stretched and made myself "bigger" in the same movement. He left, I "Won" and didn't even fight.
Deep down I knew that I was a fighter and he was an amateur so what did I have to worry about? What techniques did he know? How many hours of bag work had he done

8Step Sifu

[8stepsifu]

Read up on some primatology. Scratching you head and agreeing with them when they say your gay will get you out of most trouble. But thats omega male stuff. Thats why we do MA. Sure all the spiritual stuff, but also to kick ass. Kenpo does lots of mental distraction for actual "Self defense" But thats the primate equivalent of letting them mount you and pump away. Just as sticking your finger in someone's face to scold them is the same thing as dominant male chimps sticking their boner in another chimps face to make them submissive. In high school I watched a Discover Channel show on Primate posturing. The next day, some wannabee baddass/ streetfighter knew I did kung fu and wanted to fight. I streched and yawned in the sun and said, "Ok" His lower back was shaking and he backed down.
1.I showed my teeth by yawning
2. I was relaxed and exposed my chest, showing him I wasn't afraid to get hit and that he wasn't a threat.
3.I also had my hands in the air in fists as I stretched and made myself "bigger" in the same movement. He left, I "Won" and didn't even fight.
Deep down I knew that I was a fighter and he was an amateur so what did I have to worry about? What techniques did he know? How many hours of bag work had he done?

8Step Sifu

[obiwan]

8 Step is right.

Most people think the only way out of a fight is to back down.

Don't forget intimidation is just as effective. It is of course a lot more difficult, but I have stared down people from fighting.

Just last month, this jerk was pushing his girlfriend around before I intervened.

I looked at him, he backed down.

All you got to do, is show that you are more serious about the situation than they are. They you know what your are doing and that they have a serious chance of getting hurt even if they win. 9.99/10 times, they dont want to take on the risk.

Course you cant avoid the pyschotics who actually DO WANT to fight for no reason and are looking for the excuse. Evaluate. Normally you can smell the testosterone levels of these guys way before it gets to this. For these guys, back down. THEY Are more serious about the fight than you.

The Force will be with you...always

[vingtsunstudent]

some people just have no brains.
i remember we once threw this guy out of a club just after it hit new year, he king hit this guy & knocked him out cold. when we ask what had provoked him to do it he just said 'i wanted to be the first person thrown out this year'.
now there's intelligence for ya.
vts

[Rolling Elbow]

read next post please, a mess up here.

[Rolling Elbow]

I have to say that despite our argument on the Systema, I like 8 step's style and way of thinking.

Learning to talk your way out of a fight is always nice..I got picked on allot when i was younger. My dad and mom would always teach me these ways to talk my way out of things..when my mom was not around, my dad would get fed up and tell me to pound their teeth in the next time they bugged me and that was the only way to make them listen, and to gain some confidence in return.(He even showed me combos with the elbows and head buts haha)

So yes, it is good to talk one's way out of a situation..but i have to admit, i train today because i hate f**kers like Strangelove mentioned. People who try to intimidate..if they get in my face i am not going to say anything. As soon as they initiate movement, then what the hell- go to town on their face(even if you lose the fight..if you can walk away at the end of the day -hooray.) Why?, because sometimes walking away will linger and bug you for days after wards. Although it is "bad" to admit that i may want to be more like the Cobra Kai kids in Karate Kid Part I than Daniel San, i like to study martial arts for other purposes. How about the time when some jerk at the bar who doesn't leave you alone will want to try and make himself look tough in public by using you as an outlet because he is mad? What gives him the right?

Just like my dad did, you can tell others that it is all about balance and peace and love and control, but deep down, you know that it is in your nature to give and want to give someone a good ass kicking when he takes liberties with you. So in conclusion, you have to be prepared to ignore your "wife" from time to time and do what is right for your own peice of mind. You don't have to start the fight..but don't be afraid to finsih it. Too much time spent backing down means less knowledge of what it is like to actually step up

Michael Panzerotti
Taijutsu Nobody from the Great White North..

[origenx]

8stepsifu - **** that primatology sh*t is funny, but probably fairly applicable! Did you just see all that on Discovery or is there a book or video I can get on it?

[GreyMystik]

origenx, Geoff Thompson wrote a book describing what you are referring to...check it out, it's called "Posturing - The Art of Fighting without Fighting"- i believe this may be what you are looking for-

[8stepsifu]

Desmond Moriss' "The Human Zoo" and "The Naked Ape" also since I was 5 I've loved watching Marty Stalfer and Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kindom because I like watching the animals fight.

8Step Sifu

[nhbfighter_57069]

It all depends on what is happening. I have need a bouncer for eight years now and not all fights can be stopped. The level of booze in a person makes a huge difference. Although 8stepsifu is a good friend, that would really work if a person was still thinking straight. When somone is drunk, no matter how much you intimadate a person (I think I am rather scary...lol) and how much pain you cause them, it matters how drunk and ****ed they are. I have bounced guy that are 100 lbs soaking wet and 300 lbs. The more drunk they are the tougher it is. I have broken a guys nose, head butt (It was after he hit me, we only strike if hit first) popped his elbow, straight arm bar and his ankle, heel hook. He was messed up, the only way we finally stopped him was I had to rear naked choke him till he about passed out and the cops finally showed up. He was still fighting with the cops.

[8stepsifu]

I was thinking of sober people and not ones with liquid courage. They say it's easier to handle drunks cuz their uncoordinated, but I just find them unpredictable.

Btw...NHBfighter is very intimidating and you'd have to be very drunk to try anything on him.

If your not bleeding, your not having enough fun.

[premier]

Am I wrong if I assume, that drunks who want to fight are seldom experienced in MA?

[nhbfighter_57069]

You get all kinds of people wanting to fight with enough booze in them. There has been more than a few people that at least thought they were trained. Who know the type "I have a black belt in (insert least fave style here)." But for the most part no. But alot of wrestler are prone to fight, why I am not sure. So if you include wrestling as a type of martial art, then yes.