Things we won't read this year on KFM

[rubthebuddha]

since it's a new year, we need a new version of "things you won't read on kfm." add to the list as we go, but here's a start:

1. coach ross -- "i'm tired of all this bag and partner work. why can't i just go climb a mountain somewhere and practice my forms for a few months?"

2. sevenstar -- "stupid weights. all they ever do is fatten me up, slow me down and tighten my muscles. i should go practice my stances for a few hours."

3. merryprankster -- "lousy ******* had me in a near-perfect triangle, so i just reached back, gouged his eye and the ****er dropped like a sack of taters. i'm gonna hafta use that finger striking stuff more often."

4. water dragon -- "you know, tossing people ass-over-teakettle just doesn't appeal to me anymore. i think i'm going to to work on qigong for a while."

5. meat shake -- "ewwwwww, flan."

6. inic -- "yes, and i'd like supersized fries and a dr. pepper with that. to go, please."

7. ironfist -- "this all-salad diet is the best thing that's ever happened to me! i've never felt stronger."

[Vash]

What about me?

:(

[old jong]

Kung Lek : Everybody can post their favorite porn on the forum now.ÏMG function is on.

Gene: We have great videos at discount prices.;) ;) ;)

[Royal Dragon]

ME - "I'm getting married again"

[rogue]

NYRoman: America, Love it or leave it.

Oso: Why I gave up beer and pretty wimins.

Ap: The advantages of groundfighting while wearing a kilt.

[old jong]

Ralek: Sorry for the trolling guys!

[joedoe]

Serpent: I love America

Xebby: I got laid

[GunnedDownAtrocity]

GDA: guess what guys i got good news ....

[Chang Style Novice]

CSN - Unmatchable makes a good point.

[Water Dragon]

Apowen: No merryprankster, I will NOT put on the wedding dress with the little frilly things on it and practice passing guard with you.

[PHILBERT]

PHILBERT: "I'm really not interested in Margie anymore."

RTB: "I'm sick of Wing Tsun, I'm gonna go try Tae Kwon Do."

Hell...

Anyone "I'm sick of [insert martial art here], I'm gonna learn Tae Kwon Do."

Fred Sandford "That Shaolin-Do stuff is authentic, and I want to learn it."

[Shaolinlueb]

hahaha thats funny. i like.

[Unmatchable]

Good thread.

[rubthebuddha]

vashers -- too many people to get everyone. according to the main page, we have 5,824 members. that'd be more accurately stated as 5,824 accounts, but hey, who's counting? ;)

anyhoo, here's a few more:

vash -- "you know, i'm really a big fan of short signatures."

abel -- " hey, ross, you look mighty fine in them jeans. come here and **** me up the ***."

gene -- "honestly, we get all our gear from century and awma anyway."

masterkiller -- "sweet! i've finally made the big-time. team paul mitchell, here i come!"

kc elbows -- "the combination of bacon between two pieces of bread is simply revolting."

red5angel -- "i can't believe no one's figured out that i'm kung lek. it's so freaking obvious. buncha morons."

shaolintiger00 -- "i really wish master ashida would let me study for his astral team, but he just doesn't believe in me yet."

rogue -- "honey, have you seen my new ralph nader sticker? the old one on the vanagon is for the last election."

[Vash]

Originally posted by rubthebuddha
vash -- "you know, i'm really a big fan of short signatures."


Yer God ****** Right! :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad:








































































































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:D

[Chang Style Novice]

JWTaylor: "Hey, everybody! Did you miss me?"

:(

[rubthebuddha]

JWT -- "mmmm, hot dog."

african tiger -- *insert anything here*

[kungfudude14895]

you wouldnt be making fun of us hicks now would ya.lol

[apoweyn]

Originally posted by Water Dragon
Apowen: No merryprankster, I will NOT put on the wedding dress with the little frilly things on it and practice passing guard with you.

*sigh*

In point of fact, I did say "no."

You've probably seen the film footage of the resulting "negotiations."

[MasterKiller]

masterkiller -- "sweet! i've finally made the big-time. team paul mitchell, here i come!" I was going to save the news until after my competition gi with my name stitched across the butt and "Hair Warrior" stitched across the shoulders came in. :mad:

[MasterKiller]

UFC Color Commentator -- "I don't know what happened. Royce was doing fine against themeecer until that vicious bite to the jugular."

[Judge Pen]

Originally posted by MasterKiller
UFC Color Commentator -- "I don't know what happened. Royce was doing fine against themeecer until that vicious bite to the jugular."

LMAO. Great thread!

[KC Elbows]

The dreaded bite out!

Meatshake- "I'm having problems sleeping. Does anyone know of any home remedies to this problem? Also, my appetite has just dissapeared, and I'm watching the Cheech and Chong movie, but I'm just not getting it."

Design Sifu and/or Chang Style Novice- "I have no link for that."

Gene- "I wish I could help you meatshake, but I'm having the exact same problem. Nylon rope forever!"

Xebs- "I wish multiple id's were possible on this forum."

Volcano Admim- "Me too!"

And finally, the least likely to happen convo on this forum, Christopher M and GDA debating:

GDA: Kitten embryos are overrated.

CM: That's entirely subjective.

GDA: Maybe.

CM: Are you saying otherwise?

GDA: I'm saying they're chewy.[insert thread drift here]

[rubthebuddha]

hopefully, someone gets the jwt hot dog reference. *crosses fingers*

sorry about breaking the news early, MK, but people were getting suspicious when you started practicing your "AYA" screams at work.

here's some more for good measure:

chen zhen -- "i never believed kristoffer when he said all these posts would get me the wimmins. now i can't even keep all their names straight!"

norther practitioner -- "i miss my roommates." :(

ryu -- "biotch was playin me fo a foo, so i kicked dat ho's ass to the curb."

evolutionfist -- "after all these countless hours of practice and effort, i hope sifu will finally let me into his most secret of classes: point sparring."

[norther practitioner]

norther practitioner -- "i miss my roommates."

lol, yeah, I don't think that'll happen any time soon. I definitely don't miss the non-heat, non-ACed house where my dog wasn't allowed inside anymore and the non bill paying girlfriends of roommates.

I'm surprised anyone remembers crap like that... thanks rtb.:D

[MasterKiller]

Truewrestler: "I didn't have time to post a link because I was working out."

Gene: "I suggest you visit WLE.com to see if they have the supplies you are looking for."

[rogue]

hopefully, someone gets the jwt hot dog reference. *crosses fingers* Don't forget the frog belt of death.

Gene: We're really looking forward to 3 entire issues devoted only to Shaolin Do!

Gene part dux: I don't know Gigi, those animal style guys just look silly!

[Unmatchable]

Felipo Bido turning Gangster.

Backbreaker admitting he's Serious Harm and loves Eminem.

[truewrestler]

Right on MasterKiller. I'll have you know however that I have started training again :D

[Water Dragon]

MonkeySlap Too:

"Knives? No, I don't like 'em. Too brutal and vicious for me."

[GunnedDownAtrocity]

hopefully, someone gets the jwt hot dog reference. *crosses fingers*

yeah ... i member.

on that note ... sharky .....

and they are definitely chewy.

[GunnedDownAtrocity]

iron fist: hey gda and xeb you should give r&b a chance, check out these guys ...

[rubthebuddha]

i still talk to sharky all the time, so let's see how i can dig him on this:

sharky -- "come to think of it, i really didn't want the rice cakes. i just wanted to fight with someone."

GDA -- "actually, GDA stands for grand dent auto. it's like grand theft auto, but instead, i go to walmart parking lots with my radio-controlled shopping cart and run it into any new car i can find."

xebby -- "you guys don't know it, but those other accounts? they be my wimmins, and you guys are just hatin cause you're jealous." :cool:

[Kristoffer]

lmao

[GunnedDownAtrocity]

GDA -- "actually, GDA stands for grand dent auto. it's like grand theft auto, but instead, i go to walmart parking lots with my radio-controlled shopping cart and run it into any new car i can find."

lol ... more true to life than you realize. last weekend i wrecked my car driving me and herruka home. i hit a house.

same weekend my girlfriends dog ran away.

this weekend my eyelids are swollen and red from what i thought was chickenpox about 2 months ago.

but on the brightside no one really got hurt, we got the dog back, and maybe this **** will kill me.

[SifuAbel]

" " hey, ross, you look mighty fine in them jeans. come here and **** me up the ***."
"

LOL!!


Eddie Muphy must be rollling in his grave.

The way he's been dieing at the box office he should be intered.

You could do the ricky ricardo one,

Ho..... Ho......Ho....Ho, hey fred.... yeah rick?, How would joo.. like to **** me.. in dee ass?

[Mr Punch]

Originally posted by GunnedDownAtrocity
i hit a house. Yeah, them ****ers can just sneak up on you like that.

Merry Prankster:
"Yeah, and of course it's all Bush in with the Masons, the KKK and Philip Morris, and One-armed Single Mother Black Lesbian Jews for Jesus just raping the third world for its oil and to achieve world twinkie domination: if I ever get my hands on that guy I'm just gonna poke the ****er in the eye out."

Chris M:
"There were no WMDs"
Everybody else:
"OH NO THERE WEREN'T!"
Former Castleva:
"Yeah, who needs proof anyway!"
Themeecer:
"What are you crazy, you've gotta have proof, just believing isn't enough!"

Anybody:
"Royce would poke you in the eye."

Anybody:
"You would choke Royce out."

Anybody:
"You would just have to poke Royce in the eye."

[IronFist]

Originally posted by GunnedDownAtrocity
iron fist: hey gda and xeb you should give r&b a chance, check out these guys ...

lol :D

[GunnedDownAtrocity]

Yeah, them ****ers can just sneak up on you like that.

it did man. i was like taking a drink of my beer, i look up, and boom there it was.

[rubthebuddha]

i guess the most urgent question on anyone's mind, GDA:

you didn't spill the beer, did you? :(

;)