kung fu

[Ralek]

I havn't been able to post much. It's been a long time since i did any challenge matches. So i'm starting up again and will fight kung fu people in the maryland area.

This is not a troll, it's for people who are actually interested in fighitng a challenge match.

rules are:
1. one vs. one
2. no weapons
3. you win if you make them give up or KO

[PHILBERT]

Ralek, do me a favor and go post on the Internal Arts board, you might find someone there.

[David Jamieson]

well, you have certainly proved that you are unable to move beyond a singular thought process and alas are stuck in this endless loop of pitiful existance. Unoriginal thought is perfect for the droning drone of droneyness that you have become. As boring as unbuttered toast.

again? did you think we forgot about the last 50 million times you've "challenged"? LOL

cheers

[Royal Dragon]

Oh my God, I just fell off my chair!!! :D

I figured this was part of KFM's distant history. It' so distant, that some even argue if the mythical "Ralek" even existed at all.

Hey Ralek, how did your fight with Nick Monticello go last year?

[MasterKiller]

Hi KKM!

[shaolin kungfu]

OMG!!!!!! HE RETURNS!!!!!!!!!

This calls for flan.

[SevenStar]

yes, flan for all!

We were wondering what happened to you, rolls.

[Vash]

Hey, Ralek. I'll be up by Maryland probably sometime this summer, if my trip to Cali doesn't pan out. Whereabouts you at?

I'm not kung fu, but I've studied a Chuka Shaolin form from a book, and though I'm still a gimp, I think I can apply it with deadly power and stuff.

[CrippledAvenger]

Lightning bolt!

[SevenStar]

Just to make sure, you still don't racism against chinese people, right?
Did you ever master how to attack critial points ver well?

[PHILBERT]

How is Tekken Training going?

[SanSoo Student]

Too bad, I came here during post-Ralek times...
Don't know what you guys mean:confused:

[shaolin kungfu]

Ralek is the god of the earth and sky. He commands us and we must follow.

[Mr Punch]

Originally posted by SanSoo Student
Too bad, I came here during post-Ralek times... There is no post-Ralek. For he is forever.

Unfortunately, there is also no no-post Ralek...

[anton]

Originally posted by SanSoo Student
Too bad, I came here during post-Ralek times...
Don't know what you guys mean:confused:

Ralek is the second greatest troll on these forums. Search through this forum for him... very entertaining.

[scotty1]

Ralek you rock mate. Pure entertainment.

Somehow though, I just can't help but hope that someone from here will kick the sh!t out of you in a 'challenge' match, lol.

[MasterKiller]

I can't wait until someone accepts Merry...er....Ralek's new challenge.

[PHILBERT]

The funny part was that Ralek use to have like 2500 posts, but KFM did a purging on the forums and some people lost there posts (especially useless ones). Some only lost a few hundred, and some alot more. Ralek lost 2000.

[Pork Chop]

I'd take up the reins & challenge but I'm probably just a kickboxer or got all my fighting ability from my 1 bjj tutorial/rolling session.

Welcome back Ralek; glad to see you're still kicking it.

[Chang Style Novice]

The ultimate shotokan not-quite-a-yellow-belt is back!

WOOOOOOOOO!

[Indestructible]

Originally posted by Ralek
rules are:
1. one vs. one
2. no weapons
3. you win if you make them give up or KO

*strokes chin*
Hmmm, interesting.
Would I be allowed to smite you?

[Mutant]

ralek you freak of nature, welcome back.
so you've renewed your efforts to defeat all kung fu, i imagine it was your new year's resolution. maybe this year you'll have more success.
now in order to achieve this goal, youre gonna have to stop tossing off to gracie videos at home, venture out into the world and show up for one of these challenge matches...and actually fight..... you know that, don't you? of course its a big scary world outside of frederick, maryland, but i'm sure your momma will be happy to give you a ride to the fight in her el camino, provided you please her real nice, the way she likes.
good luck, little man!

[Meat Shake]

Ill accept your challenge, but under my rules.
1. We wear blindfolds.
2. We wear an earplug snugly in 1 ear only, to throw off equilibrium.
3. We fight on a tightrope.
4. The tightrope is suspended over a pit of lava and firebreathing alligators.
5. We tape knives to our fingers.
6. The referree must be a midget with a shotgun.

Do you consent to the above rules and accept my challence, girly man?

[SevenStar]

you have to go meet him. Remember, he can only travel short "dietances"

[wentwest]

Originally posted by anton


Ralek is the second greatest troll on these forums. Search through this forum for him... very entertaining.

I have to ask...

Who is the greatest troll on these forums?

[kenso]

Originally posted by wentwest


I have to ask...

Who is the greatest troll on these forums?
*cough* Ego *cough*

[anton]

Originally posted by kenso

*cough* Ego *cough*

I agree:D

[Ralek]

MasterKiller. your implying that i'm Merryprankster. i am not. I think Shaolin Tiger has met merryprankster so you could ask him and he will tell you we are not the same person.

And although you are all entertained by the challenge matches, that is not the purpose. I'm hear to fight people. I beat up an aikido black belt. I fought shaolin tiger and made him take rest breaks. and i knocked out a taijiquan instructor. John Springer never showed up to our match and he had his phone number changed.

I havn't posted in a while becuase lots of stuff going on. PA or maryalnd is OK. as long as your not too far north in PA.

The fights have happened. They are real. Shoalin tiger has fought me and can verify they are real.

[backbreaker]

http://forum.kungfumagazine.com/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=27191&highlight=bjj+the+new+ghey+judo

Just for Ralek

[blooming lotus]

I am RALEK...I am the great fighter in all of the land...I plan to kick your ass..providing you don't show up for the match....


You are so funny...it's kinda cute


deal with that.... :p

[Vash]

Hey Ralek, once I get healed up, would you like to have a fight? Seriously. During the summer, I'll probably be able to go pretty much anywhere, so just let me know. Email is in my profile. You can PM me, too.

[PHILBERT]

Vash, don't waste your time going to Maryland, go train with the Drunkards in California instead. If you went to Maryland he just won't show up.

[David Jamieson]

well that depends on the feng shui of the pool at the park, the amount of ducks present in the pool, whether or not the moon is waxing or waning and if it is summer or spring.

Oh, and there can't be any white 1983 chevettes in the parking lot or it will spoil everything.

see how ralek trys to get his cohort st00 to confirm that he is not merr... oop!

shhhhh

[ShaolinTiger00]

I think Shaolin Tiger has met merryprankster so you could ask him and he will tell you we are not the same person.

true. MP is much cooler than you'll ever be.

rest breaks? yeah. it's hard work chasing a guy down.

Wanna fight again? This time I will not stop until you are damaged goods.

[ShaolinTiger00]

see how ralek trys to get his cohort st00

**** you *****.

[Merryprankster]

see how ralek trys to get his cohort st00 to confirm that he is not merr... oop!

It's a wonder your head doesn't implode from the superior air pressure around it.


I've been in Toronto since Friday, *******.

We don't even have the same speech patterns!

[ShaolinTiger00]

Toronto is an interesting city.

I recall

Casa Loma, the zoo, CN tower and lots of hookers walking the streets..

[Merryprankster]

Well, I was only technically in Toronto two nights. I actually was in Kitchener - Which is sort of like in a 1950's time bubble. That's where Nicole's Grandmother lives. We did a lot of card playing.

On Friday Night, we popped around the city for a bit, wandering around and then meeting a friend of hers for dinner and drinks at an overpriced, trying to be part of the scene joint called "Wish." We picked it because a) it was right around the corner from where she works at Holt-Renfrew and 2) she (the friend) seems to really dig the joint.

Good thing the prices were all in goo-goo bucks and not in real money. Then we wound up somewhere near Yonge and Eglinton for more drinks... it was impossible to pull her (the friend) out of the bar. I drank three of her beers trying to get us out of there!

Then, we came back on Monday but the flight got canceled so Nicole and I holed up in the City. No partying for us though, we were exhausted.

[No_Know]

One called Vash, If you get to Frederick and one called Ralek does not show or the such, perhaps you and I might meet there.

One called ShaolinTiger00 and one called Ralek together again, I'd like to see it, if it happens--be there.

No need to doubleteam you one called Ralek. Very Good.

[Indestructible]

Originally posted by Vash
Hey Ralek, once I get healed up, would you like to have a fight?

Caution Ralek, Humaniod Typhoon's are dangerous creatures!

[truewrestler]

Ralek, ST taught me some KF... wanna fight?

[Meat Shake]

Pssshhh...
you dont know real kung fu, you just know basic kickboxing. Everybody knows that a real kung fu punch is accompanied by chi and the sound of chimes.
Stupid people.
Stupid.

[Vash]

Originally posted by Indestructible


Caution Ralek, Humaniod Typhoon's are dangerous creatures!
Indeed. The Stampede is a comin'!

[Vash]

Originally posted by No_Know
One called Vash, If you get to Frederick and one called Ralek does not show or the such, perhaps you and I might meet there.


Sounds good. I'll hook you up with a PM come summer if I'm not headed to Cali.

[Meat Shake]

Going going, back back, to cali cali.

[backbreaker]

Ralek is gonna get stabbed and have his ass stuffed in the bushes in the middle of the park one day

[GunnedDownAtrocity]

ha

[Ralek]

Vash. I'll fight you in the summer then.

Shaolin Tiger. I'll fight you again too. The "i'm tired" excuse won't save you when you get tired out. you'll have to admit defeat and i will be the champion. I'm a lot better than i was at 18/19. I'm 21 now and like a whole lot better.

Truewrestler. Your a wrestler, not a kung fu person. So you don't get to fight. Shaolin tiger is not a kung fu person anymore either but we need to have a rematch.

But i have to say shaolin tiger was the best of everyone i fought. I fought an aikido guy and he sucked so bad. Aikido sucks so bad it's almost as bad as taigiquan. I have declared myself an honorary black belt in aikido.

[Archangel]

LMAO!!!

Ralek, you are hilarious; I still don't know how you managed to get 4 pages of responses. This is your what... 10th time you've posted a challenge. Hat's of to you, you are the best troll ( sorry Seven Star) on this forum by far.

[BAI HE]

Welcome back Ralek!

HhahahahahhAHHAHahahHAhah

[Royal Dragon]

Ralek! What happened with your fight with Nick Monticello? I heard he really kicked your ass good, and THAT'S why you haven't been around since then!

Come on man, what gives with that story?

[KWUsCRD]

Originally posted by backbreaker
Ralek is gonna get stabbed and have his ass stuffed in the bushes in the middle of the park one day


He turned 21. So replace "have his ass" with "have his drunk ass", and switch "in the middle of the park" to "behind a bar."

[SevenStar]

Originally posted by Archangel
LMAO!!!

Ralek, you are hilarious; I still don't know how you managed to get 4 pages of responses. This is your what... 10th time you've posted a challenge. Hat's of to you, you are the best troll ( sorry Seven Star) on this forum by far.

No way. I admitted that I was trolling and still got a huge response. Ralek pretends he's actually serious.

[Ralek]

I never fought Nick Monticello. We emailed and fell out of contact. I cant' remember it was a long time ago.

Sevenstar, this isn't a troll. I really do fight the people and the fights HAVE happened. I swear it. and any responses that don't have to do with fighting me don't matter. You can say it's troll to challenge, but that's what they all did back in the china days. All the china's fought challenege matches. I am a yellow belt in shotokan karate and an aikido black belt, and a BJJ white belt.

Shaolin Tiger. When can you fight? Do you have a good place to fight? last time the cops were called so somewhere indoors would be best.

Truewrestler. I might fight you if you want. Becuase so far Vash is the only pure kung fu person and he can't fight until summer.

It's funny how the only people who accept the challegenes are the wrestlers/BJJ people. all the kuhng fu people are afraid. shoalin tiger did wrestling before we fought so he was a wrestler.

[Ralek]

vash. what style are you and what are all the styles you have learned? And how old are you and how much do you wiegh?

i'm 21
wieght: 193 pounds
stye: shotokan karate, BJJ

[Vash]

Ralek;

20
160lbs (when in shape, 170 right now)
5' 8"
7 years, misc styles
3 years, Isshinryu Karate
Gonna get a kung fu form from some dudes down south so's you'll agree to take a hooj a$$-whuppin.

[Ralek]

160 pounds? you must be a very little guy.

Your a karate fighter? karate teaches people how to get themselves knocked out. All those years of reverse punches makes a bad habbit of not keeping your hands up. And all the light contact sparring it is dumb. But it's not as bad as kung fu so you at least have something.

I got a yellow belt in karate then quit. karate is dumb. i realized that when i was like 10 years old. It's very pathetic to see adults doing karate. All the dumb stances and ****. People running around doing katas to try and become a better fighter. It's very gay.

BJJ has embarassed karate and kung fu so much that there is no more reason for any adult to be learning kung fu.

[Vash]

Indeed, I'm a light guy.

But, considering my bodyweight, I wouldn't consider a
260lbs bench
300lbs squat
215lbs clean and press
light feat.

So, I needn't learn kung fu to hand you your @$$? Joy. But, I think I will anyway. I'd love to work on some BJJ some more, but my back is a little to fargone for that anymore. Oh, well. I'll have to rely on my old Tae Kwon Do anti-grappling skillz to bear me out.

[Ralek]

I can bench press over 150 pounds. I'm not sure how much i can squat and i dont' know what a clean press is.

[crazymaddrunk]

I'll fight you dumba$$

send me a PM and let's get it on pr!ckboy

and we go ONLY by the rules stated, correct????

[PHILBERT]

God how I love reading Ralek's posts.

[Fu-Pau]

Ralek/Vash

So you two can lift heavy objects? I can see that you will both go far in life and achieve great things...

[Nick Monticello]

I never fought Nick Monticello. We emailed and fell out of contact. I cant' remember it was a long time ago.

Nick Sez----------> No, We met, I kicked your skinny little ass, and then you ran away before giving me my winnings!! THEN you dissapeared from the forum again!!

Your only back now becasue you think I'm not around anymore, because all I ever do is lurk.

[shaolin kungfu]

lol at "bench over 150":D

[PHILBERT]

Originally posted by shaolin kungfu
lol at "bench over 150":D

I couldn't bench over 150 if my life depended on it. He might have a reason, other than muscle lacking (not defending Ralek here though). For me, when I bench, I do proper form, but when I add a certain amount of weight, it begins placing stress on my shoulder and elbow joints, causing me to not be able to lift it back up cause it starts popping.

I can do other chest exercises easily, dumbell flies, cable flies, push ups, etc very well. I see people bench pressing 250, then doing flies and can't go above 60 (30 each arm). I use to do around 110 (55 on each arm) for a while before I stopped working out. Which I need to start doing again.

And as far as push ups, I took a fitness test at school and did 101 before falling on my face from exhaustion. Most of the others in the class couldn't get past 30, including the buff guys. I know though that after like 15, it begins just being endurance.

[Vash]

Originally posted by PHILBERT
For me, when I bench, I do proper form, but when I add a certain amount of weight, it begins placing stress on my shoulder and elbow joints, causing me to not be able to lift it back up cause it starts popping.

I can do other chest exercises easily, dumbell flies, cable flies, push ups, etc very well. I see people bench pressing 250, then doing flies and can't go above 60 (30 each arm). I use to do around 110 (55 on each arm) for a while before I stopped working out. Which I need to start doing again.

And as far as push ups, I took a fitness test at school and did 101 before falling on my face from exhaustion. Most of the others in the class couldn't get past 30, including the buff guys. I know though that after like 15, it begins just being endurance.

That shoulder problem sounds the same as mine. Just before my injury, I had gotten my shoulders back in shape to do some benching. I think the problem (for me, at least) was an overdevelopment of the anterior delts in relation to the posteriors.
But, mine had gotten so bad that I couldn't hit more than 15 pushups. After I got them rehabilitated, though, I could chop off two sets of 50.

There were some good exercises for shoulder rehab in Men's Health about a year back. Don't know if they'd still be on their site, though.

[blooming lotus]

there's a very good reason for that...by training the agonist and not giving same attention to the antagonist muscle, you end up with deceleration as the antagonist goes into protective mode to oppose the agonist action / movement.

Also, I'm just wondering who you guys feel about relatve stregth in comparrison to maximal strength? Wouldn't you rateher have a higher ratio of power generation and useable muscle per kg of mass than a whole bunch of muscluar mass that not only comprimises your range of movement but forces your body into a protective mechaniasm/function of decelerated rdf (rate of force developement) ?...do you realise that with the extra bulk, you would need to be several times faster than the lighter guy to get the same amount of power / kg ?....which considering movement range of bigger folks????? I guess that was why bruce lee chose "apparent" emaciation or extreme lean, light mass ;)

[Ralek]

No, i have never met you nick. Perhaps you could describe what i look like. Shoalin tiger is the only one from the forums i have met. He knows what i look like. see if you can match what i look like to his description.

Shaolin tiger. where do you want to rematch fight?

truewrestler. where would you wantt o fight?


vash. i havn't tried doing bench press since i was like 17 years old so i'm not sure how much i can now.

[David Jamieson]

Vash you gotta work your legs more.

Your squat should be almost double your bench when you consider relative muscle mass. :D

lol @ Nick exposing Ralek as a welcher also. :D

Only on a sunday afternoon, when there are no more than three ducks in the pond (and 1 has to be female), and when there is a white chevette in the parking lot with a half eaten hotdog on teh drivers seat and no more than 1,879 leaves on the biggest tree, will Ralek back out of a fight iwth you and welch on the promised prize he offers after you go through all the trouble of traveling to gawdammed Baltimore to smack him for talking smack on an anonymous forum where he is actually just trolling, and likely is another member who doesn't practice Kungfu and hates all Kungfu people for loving kungfu and not bowing down or giving in to those who think that football and high school wrestling has all the answers when it comes to combat.

And the teenburger turns...

cheers

[FatherDog]

Originally posted by blooming lotus
there's a very good reason for that...by training the agonist and not giving same attention to the antagonist muscle, you end up with deceleration as the antagonist goes into protective mode to oppose the agonist action / movement.

Also, I'm just wondering who you guys feel about relatve stregth in comparrison to maximal strength? Wouldn't you rateher have a higher ratio of power generation and useable muscle per kg of mass than a whole bunch of muscluar mass that not only comprimises your range of movement but forces your body into a protective mechaniasm/function of decelerated rdf (rate of force developement) ?...do you realise that with the extra bulk, you would need to be several times faster than the lighter guy to get the same amount of power / kg ?....which considering movement range of bigger folks????? I guess that was why bruce lee chose "apparent" emaciation or extreme lean, light mass ;)

Paging IronFist.... Paging Ironfist... come in, Ironfist...

[Merryprankster]

Also, I'm just wondering who you guys feel about relatve stregth in comparrison to maximal strength? Wouldn't you rateher have a higher ratio of power generation and useable muscle per kg of mass than a whole bunch of muscluar mass that not only comprimises your range of movement but forces your body into a protective mechaniasm/function of decelerated rdf (rate of force developement) ?...do you realise that with the extra bulk, you would need to be several times faster than the lighter guy to get the same amount of power / kg ?....which considering movement range of bigger folks?????

*snicker*
*Tee-Hee*


*BWAHHAHHAHHHAHAHHAHAHHHA!!!!*

[Christopher M]

Originally posted by blooming lotus
Wouldn't you rateher have a higher ratio of power generation and useable muscle per kg of mass than a whole bunch of muscluar mass

For a chin-up competition, or for fighting?

[blooming lotus]

dude :rolleyes:

[PHILBERT]

Where's My Car?

Blooming, that was just, the perfect come back to counter the argument, which no one here even had to post because we all are thinking the same thing.

[SevenStar]

Originally posted by blooming lotus
there's a very good reason for that...by training the agonist and not giving same attention to the antagonist muscle, you end up with deceleration as the antagonist goes into protective mode to oppose the agonist action / movement.

Also, I'm just wondering who you guys feel about relatve stregth in comparrison to maximal strength? Wouldn't you rateher have a higher ratio of power generation and useable muscle per kg of mass than a whole bunch of muscluar mass that not only comprimises your range of movement but forces your body into a protective mechaniasm/function of decelerated rdf (rate of force developement) ?...do you realise that with the extra bulk, you would need to be several times faster than the lighter guy to get the same amount of power / kg ?....which considering movement range of bigger folks????? I guess that was why bruce lee chose "apparent" emaciation or extreme lean, light mass ;)

Did you buy a time machine, or are you just stuck in the past?

[apoweyn]

Originally posted by MasterKiller
I can't wait until someone accepts Merry...er....Ralek's new challenge.

Time to come clean.

Merryprankster, Shaolintiger, and Ralek are all three just splinters of my own diseased consciousness. Like Identity, but infinitely lamer.


Stuart, the dominant personality

[Pork Chop]

ap
wouldn't that make you like mardok the multiple man?
or were you just using a +3 scepter of illusion (which creates a hologram that needs a 13+ saving throw to see through)?




Notice how the fear of the Ralek makes him ignore the true might of the Pork Chop? Muwahahahaahahaha Bow down in fear Yamasaki boy.

[ShaolinTiger00]

Yamasaki boy

that would be me.

-Ap's angry, mma personality

[apoweyn]

Originally posted by BMore Banga
ap
wouldn't that make you like mardok the multiple man?
or were you just using a +3 scepter of illusion (which creates a hologram that needs a 13+ saving throw to see through)?

I really don't see why I should have to answer questions from yet another fragment of my own broken psyche.

[Pork Chop]

"I am Ap's colon... I get cancer, I kill Ap"



I thought it was Ralek that studied at Yamasaki's.
Mario was lookin sharp this weekend in his ref suit.
Maybe I should go there. hehe

[apoweyn]

Well, colon, I suppose I had it coming. We haven't always seen eye to eye. And I've usually imposed my will (and various and sundry chili recipes) when I probably shouldn't have. No hard feelings. [thud]


Ralek reputedly hasn't trained anywhere at all (aside from that brief prepubescent stint in shotokan). And by his own admission, he wouldn't set foot in a BJJ school.

[Merryprankster]

I would just like to chime in as Ap's poltically aware but angry ****se...

Uh...

Which part am I again?

[ShaolinTiger00]

I thought it was Ralek that studied at Yamasaki's.
Mario was lookin sharp this weekend in his ref suit.
Maybe I should go there. hehe.

cool indeed, though Mario rarely teaches anymore. as his other business keeps him very busy. Most of the class instruction is overseen by his brother Fernando Yamasaki or Francisco Neto, both bb in bjj and judo.
In fact the last time I saw Mario, we were watching the UFC together, and he drank all my beer 'cause I brought the good stuff! :D



I am Ap's complete and utter lack of suprise..

[blooming lotus]

Originally posted by SevenStar


Did you buy a time machine, or are you just stuck in the past?

are you a total d*ck..or do you just like to pose as one??? :rolleyes: ....


just kidding but like all your information didn't come from "the olden days" :rolleyes:

[rubthebuddha]

must ... bite ... tongue ...

[Vash]

Sweet HeyZues, I forced myself to see the BloomingLotus' post. Dear God, there truly is a reason it's optional to see ignored user's posts.

[D_Messenger]

Lets no get violent, please shall we?
Sevenstar, Lotus, there is no point on being violent with each other, okay

"Oh buddhas of the past, present and future,
bodisathwas, an ocean of measureless qualities,
please hear my anguished words of truth:
Karma in a ocean of joy,
let the might of your compassion arise
to bring a quick end to the flowing stream
of the blood and tears,
our most cherished and long felt desire.
They are drunk with demonic delusions.
What is right and what is wrong?"

[Kymus]

Originally posted by Ralek
I havn't been able to post much. It's been a long time since i did any challenge matches. So i'm starting up again and will fight kung fu people in the maryland area.

This is not a troll, it's for people who are actually interested in fighitng a challenge match.

rules are:
1. one vs. one
2. no weapons
3. you win if you make them give up or KO

Ralek,

Please do the world a favor and go play in traffic.

[blooming lotus]

You know vash, once you are recovered and get back into training, I'm I will find you not close to half the pompus a*s I do at the moment. No need for violence true, and appologies to 7 on that score....even if his comment was rediculous :cool: