The Ultimate Kung Lek Conspiracy Thread.

[rogue]

As most here know our friendly left leaning Canuck cousin went from a moderate moderator to a ranting, raving, flaming rhetorical bomb thrower. I mean he even got a rise out of Ross and we know how hard that is.

So the question, has KL been kidnapped and replaced him with this genetically engineered evil twin? Or has KL finally been implanted with a microchip and is being controlled personally by Howard Dean. Or did KL finally submit to the ELFs.

So put on your aluminum foil hats, channel Art Bell and help me figure this out.

What (http://www.conspiracyplanet.com/)

is KL (http://www.conspire.com/)

thinking about. (http://www.shout.net/~bigred/cn.html)

And we can't forget the Illuminati (http://www.conspiracyarchive.com/)


:D :D :D :D :D :D

[David Jamieson]

sweeet.

but lets not forget:

www.infowars.com

www.rense.com

www.prisonplanet.com

www.whitehouse.org

and possibly the most horrendous and evil wholsale terror site:


http://www.puppyfind.com

:D < one is insane enough rogue but I'm flattered and those are some pretty weird@ss sites you found, mine were pretty much all first page googlers on a key word of conspiracy. :D <oop, i guess two is the number of insane smiley

[KC Elbows]

I had a candid discussion about this with Donald Sutherland at the Capital, and he disclosed that it all began back in '97 in the leather bars of San Francisco.

As early as '96, Gene Ching had received disturbing reports from all over the country: sudden bouts of useful research taking part over dial up connections, people using the world wide web to get together and share useful information, corporate workers using the internet to access useful excel formats.

I don't need to point out to you the ramifications this had for those in power.

There was a panic, a feeling of make believe took over the halls of IT businesses, and sure, the CEO's and executives could have held meetings to deal with the situation in its infancy, but how could they call a meeting on it without bringing attention to the fact that previous meetings had been set up, designed, and operated with a single minded dedication to not actually doing anything but making power point presentations and primping for more funds to do the same?

You're looking at the why, but missing the who. Who would benefit from it all? Who could pull it off?

Fact. In 1997, rubthebuddha had not one, but four Canadian foreign exchange students in his home for an extended duration. All four were, in fact, the entire top level of Canada's biological weapons division, all in one home, all drinking beer with one member, all since either dead or unwilling to discuss the period beginning in February of that year, and ending in May.

Fact. In 1996, Gene "Bling" Ching, under the guise of a liberal wishing to discuss music, met with high level canadian quadruple agent Neil "Look out momma there's a white boat coming down the river" Young. Witnesses to that meeting stated that the two had discussed "an american collaborator hosting four canadian scientists the next year", all in relation to a plan "to combat moderation on the internet by having moderate people moderate immoderate people", which they referred to as "Pathogen: Immoderation". Witnesses also said the two discussed "other far out stuff".

Fact. Kung Lek once moderated this forum.

This is clearly a high level conspiracy involving the leaders not only of the United States, but also Canada, and by default, the British.

I don't ask that you believe me. Do your own homework. Call up Donald Sutherland and ask him about this conversation. I assure you, he will deny it ever happened. But why?

[David Jamieson]

wow, kc, i bow to you man (if you are a man, which sometimes i doubt)

that was truly a beautiful thing.

if you actually just pulled that out of your butt after drifting in and surfing around a bit, you msut be considered one of the greatest intellects on these boards.

but if you had to think about it since this morning, you only get half points i hope you understand. :D

now, had you added something in their about how ross and i both think each other is a clandestine nazi, then i would've given you the full 10,000 points even if you had been mulling that over all day.

thank you, i am truly flattered to be in the same paragraphs as the overlord donald sutherland, our own pseudo overlord gene ching and the remaining cats of thousands that you have mentioned.

[KC Elbows]

Actually just came on, I've just seen Stone's JFK far too many times.

As for further proof, here it is:

http://theonion.com/news/

[KC Elbows]

"(if you are a man, which sometimes i doubt)"

Proof would get me banned, unless I were a Ken Doll, or perhaps even then.

[sakko]

banned? heh... that van that just pulled up outside your house is NOT filled with forum admins my friend. RUN.

[KC Elbows]

Originally posted by sakko
banned? heh... that van that just pulled up outside your house is NOT filled with forum admins my friend. RUN.

Good thinking. If it were forum admins, I'd only have to walk somewhat briskly.

[rubthebuddha]

Fact. In 1997, rubthebuddha had not one, but four Canadian foreign exchange students in his home for an extended duration. All four were, in fact, the entire top level of Canada's biological weapons division, all in one home, all drinking beer with one member, all since either dead or unwilling to discuss the period beginning in February of that year, and ending in May. they're not really dead, KC. they're on ice until i have further need for them.
Good thinking. If it were forum admins, I'd only have to walk somewhat briskly. uh oh, i think KC knows how much sevenstar and i hate running. :D i'll do footwork or kickboxing or shadowboxing or bike all day long, but running is about as exciting as yanking armhair one by one.

[Ben Gash]

Rogue: you need to get out more
Kung Lek: drugs are bad mm'kay
KC elbows: leave the British out of this (unless you want to "commit suicide" in a field somewhere ;) )

[red5angel]

what are you gonna do Ben Gash, beat him to death with fish n chips? ;)

[sakko]

mmmm fish n chips :D

[MasterKiller]

Originally posted by KC Elbows


Good thinking. If it were forum admins, I'd only have to walk somewhat briskly. KC has promoted the correct to the 33rd degree.

[rubthebuddha]

does that mean the correct gets another patch?

[David Jamieson]

no patches, but at 33 you can get political office!

woo hoo

vote for the correct for president! and get that hayseed out once and for all!

jab jab cross, jab, jab hook, uppercut uppercut, elbow, elbow, knee knee takedown and stomp to the teeth with the heel. boohaa!

[red5angel]

dumb ass

[Kristoffer]

only a fool would jab jab cross, jab jab hook

[red5angel]

only a fool would jab jab cross, jab jab hook

exactly, or buy into socialist canadian propoganda as well....

[CaptinPickAxe]

Lemme be the first to congratulate KL for going from a pristine, whiney Canuck to a Brash, infamous thug. You're well on your way to being up there with the other great Canadians...like Jim Carrey and....and....well Jim Carrey.

[David Jamieson]

more than just jim carrey cap'n

prolly better than half of all your hockey players too :D

lot's of yer hollywood stars (besides jim) like Mike Meyers, Martin Short, Eugene Levy, Pamela Anderson, Shania Twain, Neve Campbell, Michael J. Fox, Natasha Henstridge, ... well, I could actually be typing all night by the time you figured out that most of your movies stars are canadian and that there are actually only 34 born in the states and 12 or so Brits :D

That's right, even the one and only Captain Kirk (William Shatner) is a Canadian (and born in the french part no less!) and just so that you know we canadians are also controling your media :D

Peter Jennings is Canadian and so is Morley Safer!:eek: and a few more, but they made me promise not to tell or I would have to face the grand council of Canadian infiltration of the United states for the advancement of the intellectual capacities of people who would otherwise have mullet cuts for the duration of thei life time. :D

honestly, if you guys only knew how many Canadians were down there giving you your news, music and movies you would be totally blown away.

oh well

cheers

[rubthebuddha]

That's right, even the one and only Captain Kirk (William Shatner) is a Canadian (and born in the french part no less!) i'm trying to draw a connection between french canadian and the standard shatner speaking habit ...

spock
scan the planet's
surface for
other
lifeforms.

sometimes i think kirk's lines were written by a really bad college poetry student. :o

[CaptinPickAxe]

I'll give you William Shatner and thats it... all else are B- actors and whatever else they may be...

but you...you have potential...You can be the Al Capone from Canada...infamous yet slightly conservative.

On music, though, I have to disagree 150%. Theres nothing like an American musician...

[David Jamieson]

Pam Anderson though!

come on!

cooooommmmmmeeeee OOOOOOOnnnnnnnnn!!!!!!

Pamela Anderson (insert rock star last name here)

come on! commme on shelly!!!!

LOL

[CaptinPickAxe]

Nope...sorry...

Jessica Alba or Shannyn Sossamon.

I hate fake tits...besides, Gonnorhea is nothing to clap about.

[David Jamieson]

Jessica Alba???

apparently you don't like any tits :D

[scotty1]

Kung Lek VII...

Like it.

Like a cop that got fired and turned to vice. :)

[rogue]

Hey KL, without us here in the lower 48 all those famous canucks would be driving zambonies in Alberta.:p

And hey all, keep a sense of perspective about things.


Anybody have any good conspiracy theories?

[WanderingMonk]

Let's see, KL's kung-fu web stuff seem to have disappeared. He has lost his tempered image of self-restraint. He has undergone some type of drastic change. Maybe he had undergone a emotionally traumatic event that cause him to repriorize his life (e.g., a near death experience while drinking Canada Dry). Perhaps, it is a case of the eternal sunshine of a spotless mind (starring Jim Carrey, a Canuck), an operation that went very, very wrong.:)

NO, I haven't seen the movie yet, but the title is just so catchy.

wm

[David Jamieson]

nope, none of the above wanderer.

Just seeking to attain the unattainable. So far, sh1ts workin out too!

see, the way i see it, the more you repress the more your depress, teh more you depress the more life is not life but a friggin chore and i always hated doing chores.

I'm coming on 40, and I wanna live d@mmit, why won't you let me liiiiiivvveee :D

I could've stopped at the motorcycle i guess, but i went for the electric guitar too, going for the band and lemme tell ya, I fuggin rock amigo!

Yah!

Having Kungfu don't mean ya gotta wear a robe and have a stick so far up your @ss that you forget who you really are. I'm sick of that shiot and I'm going for it. LIfe is short! Know that!

I paid my dues, I did my kowtowing, not once, not twice but thrice i spent so many years of my life sitting at someone elses feet that i never bothered to check and see my own needing clipping and scrubbing.

Every son must leave home, every father must let them go and every man should get a woman (or another man if that's your thing, either way your pluggin someone :D )

The hardest lessons teach us the most and etc etc etc etc.

Don't die with regrets and don't wonder about nothing, it's been in front of each of us all along and all that other good stuff.

Now if you feel the same, then don't hold back, run! Run now and run naked if you like! yOu have a very very very short time on this planet, do you really wanna spend it in a way where you are always wondering what could've been? What might've been?

That is all.

HOpe you all can be as happy as I am right now, because it is a hoot!

[cerebus]

"I am Kung Lek's mid-life crisis." :D :D :D

[David Jamieson]

lol, sure you are

[Kristoffer]

he's high as a mother****er

[David Jamieson]

me? I don't use drugs, I don't even smoke cigarettes!:eek:
maybe have a beer once in a while with some food, but that and tea are the extent of my vices.

heck, i won't even go near a fast food place, scares the willies out of me all that fat and poison and death in a smiley bag.

[SevenStar]

Bah. Bacon, sausage, fatty cuts of meat, meat with higher fat content, peanut butter, salt, rich sauces on food, salad dressing, whole milk, eggs, pop, cakes, sugar-rich cereals...

Many people's kitchens have the same fat, poison and death - it's just not conveniently packaged.

[SevenStar]

Originally posted by Kung Lek
[B]
Having Kungfu don't mean ya gotta wear a robe and have a stick so far up your @ss that you forget who you really are. I'm sick of that shiot and I'm going for it. LIfe is short! Know that!


Too bad you didn't realize this until after you stopped being a mod...:D

[David Jamieson]

Not my kitchen dude, yuck! lol


heh heh,i am soon to disappear entirely, why even now, my ....for....m...is....disper........sing...

[Kristoffer]

I bet you snort sugar!

you so fat, your blood type is ragu
u pee butter. rezpect

[rogue]

What's cooking up in Canada? (http://www.heraldsun.news.com.au/common/story_page/0,5478,9024098%5E663,00.html)

[CaptinPickAxe]

That is straight out of snatch. Except the whole selling the bacon to the towns folk. That guy's nickname should be bricktop.

[cerebus]

WHOAH! *Walks away shaking head to look for a book on vegetarianism* :eek:

[David Jamieson]

yeah that mo fo be weird.

just as weird as wisconsin cannibal dude (http://www.karisable.com/skazdahmer.htm).

man, it takes all kinds don't it?

anybody stateside get the cbc channel down there?

cheers

[Shaolinlueb]

Originally posted by rogue
What's cooking up in Canada? (http://www.heraldsun.news.com.au/common/story_page/0,5478,9024098%5E663,00.html)


woah. someone watches SNATCH way too many times.

[rogue]

At least we know what Canadian Bacon really is.

[David Jamieson]

Beats a wisconsin hotdog in my book. :D

k, wait a minute...

rogue, you are a sick man and a total b@stard for dragging me into this beyond repair!

I shall now fixate upon you as the cause of my ruination.

:p