OT: Valuable information for you all

[Meat Shake]

As I mature, Ive learned that you cannot make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they panic and give in.
Ive learned that no matter how much I care, some people are just *******s.
Ive learned that it takes years to build up proper trust, but it only takes suspicion, not proof, to destroy it.
Ive learned that you can get by on charm for about 15 minutes, but after that you had better have a big willy or huge boobs.
Ive learned that you shouldnt compare yourself to others - they are more ****ed up than you think.
Ive learned that we are responsible for what we do, unless we are celebrities.
Ive learned that regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion fades, and there had better be a lot of money to take its place.
Ive learned that the people you care most about in life are taken from you too soon, and all the less important ones just never go away.

[The Willow Sword]

Is this some Rip off of George Carlins comedy routine?

[rubthebuddha]

half of george carlin's stuff is ripped of from pop humor anyway -- he just put it on video or daily calendars.

[CaptinPickAxe]

I've learned that just because a chick is 'loose' doesn't mean she can take the whole D.
I've learned never to drink beer before liquor.
I've learned that if you want to go home with a girl for the night, just hold her hair back while she's vomiting.
I've learned that it is easy to make first time smokers drink the bong water.
I've learned no matter how good life may be...god will still ass fu(k you when you least expect it.
I've learned to never, never, never ever eat HEB's mongolian beef...the hard way.
I've learned that chicks don't dig money or a nice house...you have to have a H2 with spreewells and a butler named Jeebs.
I've learned how easy it is to get laid in Austin...God Bless Austin, Tx.
I've learned that just because you've gone south of the boarder on a chick, that doesn't mean you can't kiss her afterwards.
I've learned that this rule doesn't work both ways.

[Volcano Admim]

ok

I've learned that when chicks smile to you a hell-of-a-lot it means they wanna you to grab em