I Passed!!!

[Vash]

Ha! Just got the email! I'm now a certified fitness trainer. Just gotta send in a copy of my CPR card and I get my nice, numbered certificate and I got a job!

*shakes groove thang*

[Starchaser107]

good job!!!

[Vash]

thanks!

[yenhoi]

How did you become a certified fitness trainer?

:confused:

[Yum Cha]

Phew...I thought this was a thread about kidney stones....

[cerebus]

"I'm not a certified fitness trainer"

Did you mean to say "I'm NOW a certified fitness trainer"?

If so, congratulations!

[CaptinPickAxe]

congrats, chap!

[Toby]

Congrats - now you can compare notes with Eyebrows!

[blooming lotus]

was going to give a warm welcome to the club speil to the guy and you ruined my intro :mad: :mad:

[cerebus]

BWAHAHAHAHA!!! You and BL are in the same "club"!!!! :D :D :D

Does this mean your English will start to suck REAL bad? And you'll start telling all sorts of tall tails about being a soldier, stripper, model, English teacher, martial artist, boxer-beater, genius, etc, etc ? :D :D

[Kristoffer]

Vash is all of those ;)
good job mate

[blooming lotus]

hard for a small mind in a small town to grasp that some people are voracious in their persuit of variety of life experiences ha??... well you're not alone so don't feel bad for a moment.

Ever seen "a life less ordinary"???

Ps: my students love my tales ( note spelling :) ) of how I came to be "teacher Michelle" as they like to call me and also enjoy a foreign wanderers' / seeker of truth and experiences' perspective.

Yah... If changing your mind when a new goal is on the horizon is crazy, then I am... most definatley, but at my current uni where I teach, there's a whole other bunch of foreign crazoes along side me and I feel just fine with it ;)

chiil c'bus :eek:

[cerebus]

"small mind in a small town" must be a reference to yourself. I live in the Oakland/ San Francisco area and neither of those are small towns (though you've probably never even heard of either of them, nor could your small mind contain such long words).

As for feeling bad, only for the poor fools who are supposedly learning English from you.

As for you being a "seeker of truth", well keep on seeking 'cause you obviously haven't found it yet. People like yourself, unfortunately, never will.

[LarryD]

Originally posted by Vash
Ha! Just got the email! I'm not a certified fitness trainer. Just gotta send in a copy of my CPR card and I get my nice, numbered certificate and I got a job!

*shakes groove thang*


Congrats!

[Chang Style Novice]

Huzzah!

shot and a beer -> Vash

Wait, maybe that's not quite appropriate.

[David Jamieson]

so you are gonna help people get fit?

[blooming lotus]

Originally posted by cerebus
"small mind in a small town" must be a reference to yourself. I live in the Oakland/ San Francisco area and neither of those are small towns (though you've probably never even heard of either of them, nor could your small mind contain such long words).

As for feeling bad, only for the poor fools who are supposedly learning English from you.

As for you being a "seeker of truth", well keep on seeking 'cause you obviously haven't found it yet. People like yourself, unfortunately, never will.

Cerebus : A. this thread should be nothing more than a place to welcome Vash and his new quals and second, give it a freakin rest ha??!!

[FatherDog]

Originally posted by Chang Style Novice
Huzzah!

shot and a beer -> Vash

Wait, maybe that's not quite appropriate.

That's /always/ appropriate.

[Vash]

Thanks, all. I appreciate it.

Cerebus: Indeed, I meant "now" as opposed to "not." That's one of those Eyebrows' (note placement of apostrophe ;) :p ) colloquial misspellings. Or something.

KL: Yes, I'm actually going to help people get fit. I'm very much looking forward to it. To be honest, I started looking into becoming a trainer only to improve my ability to train myself. But, as I've gone through the training, and the time that's passed, I'm actually thinking about how nice it's going to be to help someone besides myself. In particular, I'm looking forward to training my brother. He's 13, Bi-Polar, and obese. I really hope I can help make a positive difference in his life.

[Vash]

Fatherdog:

It would certainly be appropriate, if I drank. However, I don't.

I do slam back the ocassional non-alcoholic egg nog, though.

By the fugging gallon.

[GunnedDownAtrocity]

Originally posted by FatherDog
That's /always/ appropriate.

i agree with this man 110%.

and congradulations vash. maybe you will start training some really fat nice girl and then you'll get her fit and bang her.

[Tak]

Maybe that's HOW he'll get her fit.

[GunnedDownAtrocity]

vash bangs fat chicks?

[Vash]

. . . not exactly the direction I had in mind for this thread . . .

:o :eek: :p

[FatherDog]

Originally posted by GunnedDownAtrocity
vash bangs fat chicks?

Hey, somebody's gotta do it. I, for one, salute Vash's valiant efforts in taking one for the team.

So when you see a ham-creature coming towards you in a bar with a look of undisguised passion in her eyes, and at the last minute she's intercepted by a dude in an Isshin-ryu headband who asks her if she'd like some "fitness lessons"... say a silent "thank you" to Vash as you run for your car.

[mickey]

Congratulations Vash,

Now we can get free consultations from a CPT on this board.

mickey

[red5angel]

i agree with this man 110%.

I'll see yer 110% and raise you 120 proof! :)

[rubthebuddha]

you're only raising him 60%?

wuss. :rolleyes:








:D

[SevenStar]

for your first assignment, make ironfist hyoooge.

[SevenStar]

for your second assignment, slim xebby down and make sure he gets laid...










































Oh wait, you're a trainer, not a miracle worker.... :D

[Vash]

*snaps fingers*

















































IT IS DONE!!!

Xebs: Find a man named Caio Biojioni (sp?). He was an exchange student over here about 3 years ago. He will get you laid. All he talked about was going home so he could "slip into his girlfriend's pu$$y."

And for my own dignity, I don't bang fat chicks.

[Toby]

Originally posted by FatherDog
So when you see a ham-creature coming towards you in a bar with a look of undisguised passion in her eyes, and at the last minute she's intercepted by a dude in an Isshin-ryu headband who asks her if she'd like some "fitness lessons"... say a silent "thank you" to Vash as you run for your car. Roflmao! It's long, but that'd make an awesome sig, Vash!

[blooming lotus]

Originally posted by Vash
I'm looking forward to training my brother. He's 13, Bi-Polar, and obese. I really hope I can help make a positive difference in his life.

sweet as Vash... good cause and luck on your path to you both :cool:

[Vash]

Toby:

Indeed it would. I however have too much love for the T-Vixen to revert to BBW-stuffin'.

BL:

Thanks.

[sticky fingers]

Originally posted by Vash
[B In particular, I'm looking forward to training my brother. He's 13, Bi-Polar, and obese. I really hope I can help make a positive difference in his life. [/B]

Be careful with your bro. If he is on lithium for his bipolar there is a risk of lithium toxicity if he becomes dehydrated. His obesity may also be a side effect from the meds.


well done and good luck

[Vash]

Sticky:

Thanks for the advice. I know he's not on lithium, but I don't know the name of his current medication. One of them, though, is Zoloft. That, I know, has contributed to his recent weight gain, but he has been obese for several years due to depression-related inactivity and poor eating habits. He was only recently diagnosed.

His father is obscenely inactive, very overweight, and not the nicest guy in the world. He was a major problem for me before I moved out, and I can't imagine what my brother is feeling, considering he's far worse off emotionally than I ever was.

I'll post later on which BP meds he is on for more suggestions on how to handle his workouts.

Thanks again.

[GunnedDownAtrocity]

Originally posted by SevenStar
Oh wait, you're a trainer, not a miracle worker.... :D

**** .... that's as low as you can get. why not just go tazer his talleywaker or something.

[GunnedDownAtrocity]

.... i'm not saying i didn't laugh mind you, but ****. poor xebby.

[blooming lotus]

Originally posted by Vash
Sticky:

Thanks for the advice. I know he's not on lithium, but I don't know the name of his current medication. One of them, though, is Zoloft. That, I know, has contributed to his recent weight gain, but he has been obese for several years due to depression-related inactivity and poor eating habits. He was only recently diagnosed.

His father is obscenely inactive, very overweight, and not the nicest guy in the world. He was a major problem for me before I moved out, and I can't imagine what my brother is feeling, considering he's far worse off emotionally than I ever was.

I'll post later on which BP meds he is on for more suggestions on how to handle his workouts.

Thanks again.

Dude: psyche drugs are a boitch!! I'm qualified to counsel and majored in substance abuse amongst other things and presently hooked up with another engilsh teacher come qualified psychologist. and socioligist US educated babe.... are you sure the drugs are neccessary??

Zoloft has turned many a decent mind , bod and person into a zombie shuffling machine, much like the largactle shuffle similar suffers get "prescribed" and "recommended"...... bi-polar is by no means justifiable in the real and acheiving world by drugs dude !..........

.maybe the guy just needs some health and fitness info, someone to see him through his deep inner - feeling work ( and you gotta be real kind and patient to get 'em there) , and some serious detox time and motivation to make it all happen....

remember, bi-polar and obesity are a disorder of emotion and side effects of a particular mind - frame....

as folks who wanna help, I think it's our job to empathise with why they feel and think like that and replace their associations with something a lil more positve.......... he's not retarded dude. just working on some jazz ( as you do ) ........... sweet ??? :cool:

good mission dude asnd done the same for my own lil sis ;)

cheers , props and clear thought and intention again to you both

[IronFist]

Congrats, Vash! :D I didn't see this thread until now.

[Chang Style Novice]

BL - thanks for the latest addition to my sig line...

[cerebus]

Sorry to hafta do this on your thread Vash, but....

Hey BL! Fock you! You wanna talk smack to me and then whine about it when I respond, then you'd better learn to shut the fock up biotch! You know, you seemed a whole lot more intelligent when you were....gone! Why don't you try that again?

[blooming lotus]

I smack talk no-one nor am anyone's boitch. Considering you are older than me, I'm just going to presume you led a sheltered life and will leave it there. Believe it not there are those that of us who'll give you some truth regardless of how you want others to think you feel about it.

Sorry , too grey to give you credit for your post... getting tired and looking forward to an acadmeic or mature intentioned response.

you can fock and Boitch all you like.: anger has become redundundant in my life and nothing more than a reason to peg your vulnerablity.

deal with that mr. bus :rolleyes:

Ps: I'm a nice chick and I don't know what smack - talk you're talking about , but you wouldn't have paranoid delusions on occassion by any chance would you?? conspiracy theories??

????

now let vash his glory ha??

[cerebus]

Nice? You're a passive-agressive looney toon! As far as being anyone's biotch, I never claimed that. You're just a biotch in general (as in "stupid biotch").

And you do presume much (as always). You also are apparently unable to read a profile. Yeah, I lead a real sheltered life, you focking moron! :rolleyes:

This from little miss "Oh, I'll just act like everyone is beneath me 'cause I'm such a humble genius, model, dancer, kung fu ninja chick who knows SOOOO much more about everything than the rest of you poor saps" when in reality you couldn't even pass a third grade English exam, you're anorexic and weak, ugly as all get-out and think you're god's gift to the world all at once!! :rolleyes:

You're a pathetic little troll with an empty, pathetic little mind. You're not impressing anyone on this board. At one time I found you amusing. Now you just make me sick.

[blooming lotus]

some nice expression. Sometimes I got shoiyt going on and sometimes I'm a regular jane - doe...... does it matter??

Cerebus... you can spit every profanity you have at me, but I've come too far and I'm too real to turn back. Fock knows why they thought Iwas bootiful enough to model for such crazy $$$?? 1/2 the time I can't even see it myself. but I do dig sport and I dig information .

Do you have like, male / female supremacy issues, 'cause it sure aint comming from me

Ps: for those who wondered, if you replace intellegence ( as in the phrase " IQ" intellegence quotient with apptitude ( having the capacity to be adept at) , would it help any ??........thought not :rolleyes:
Equal potential is a human trait and absolutely are your craziest dreams manifestable.......... you just gotta ignore the trolls, be committed and trust what you know....


Ps:
a*holes are everywhere, but don't be harsh, 'cause they're only lacking answers themselves and their aggression is how they think they'll get them. Opposition is natural, soldier on to your dreams folks ;) and hold your head up, smile and make it happen...........


BL

PPs: I'm the freakin psychologist, stop trying to tell me you understand sanity...I don't believe you!!!!!!!!!!!11

[cerebus]

That's it Eyebrows! Turn up the volume of your ignorant passive-agressive posturing. You really need to deflate your ego. Your whole bragging about how great you are and then trying to pretend you're humble is the most nauseating hypocrisy on the entire forum!

[blooming lotus]

I am more humble than you know :( :(

I share my info and I'm open to yours......


crying now so I'm outta here.

proud ???

[cerebus]

LOL! Yeah, go ahead and prove my point some more. When you realize you have no logic to support you, you say you're crying in an attempt to gain sympathy. With sincere people I can be the most sympathetic person you'd imagine (I've even felt sorry for you before). But even my patience wears thin with the vast piles of bullsh1t you heap on this board.

Cry your azz off! You get no sympathy from me!

[blooming lotus]

You're patience???!!?? How big of you to mention it ...........I don't want your sympathy ( lil growth and maturity from yourself'd be nice on occassion though) and I'll cry all I want..........


Folks like you turn a nice person irrational.

And budhhism saves the day again


do you see you're doing nothing productive with your comments?? Can you not rise above your own ego. Really, In real life I'm half impressive at times..............( when folks like yourself aren't so needily demanding attention)

Ps: my only logic is reality and adult stiffness,...... happens to the best of us..........

[cerebus]

BWAHAHAHAHA!!! :p :p :p Oh man! That's even better!

"you're doing nothing productive with your comments"
From the person who has yet to contribute a single productive comment about anything on this board!

It's true though. No matter how hard anyone tries to break through that thick skull of yours, you just never get it. Sucks to be you.

Then asking me to rise above my own ego (where do you see me talking about being so awesome the way you always do?).

And finally saying that your logic is "reality"! Yeah, you and backbreaker both! :p :p

I do believe that you qualify as a completely psychologically aberant loon (to put it in technical terms LOL! :p)! I've never seen anyone project their own psychoses onto another person as completely as you do. You're very sick. Please get yourself the help you need.

[blooming lotus]

isn't it funny how if you look for a negative comment you'll always find one??

I have contributed alot on this board over the last yr and some and spent hours I didn't have helping out. If you sincerely for all of your years have never learnt to be civil nor communicate without the need for acting the way you do, well, I guess all I can do is note your dispostion. It doesn't take much to be a decent human being, like someone , agree or otherwise. What is wrong with the world today do you think?? ... and we're the good guys right?

[FatherDog]

Originally posted by blooming lotus
isn't it funny how if you look for a negative comment you'll always find one??

I have contributed alot on this board over the last yr and some and spent hours I didn't have helping out. today do you think?? ... and we're the good guys right?

The only thing you have contributed to this board is a vast amount of misinformation and a self-centered derailing of dozens of threads. The board would be a more useful and informative place without you.

[Serpent]

And so say all of us!

[blooming lotus]

when I say my goodbyes you all won't let me leave ( without bombarding me with where are you or don't go emails) anyway, so I may as well just ride it out.

Either way. I am studying in earnest, and having been as long as most folks here, and probably will be after alot of folks here have switched priorities or fields of persuit. So that being said, I think I'll just stay round for whatever I can get.

[Serpent]

Originally posted by blooming lotus
when I say my goodbyes you all won't let me leave ( without bombarding me with where are you or don't go emails) anyway, so I may as well just ride it out.
I find that very hard to believe! Who asked you to stay?

[blooming lotus]

:rolleyes: does "don't go Bl... really... don't worrry about the jerk offs here... we think you're great anyway" ring any bells?? Well what ever........ I'm staying.

[Serpent]

Originally posted by blooming lotus
:rolleyes: does "don't go Bl... really... don't worrry about the jerk offs here... we think you're great anyway" ring any bells?? Well what ever........ I'm staying.
No, it rings absolutely bells whatsoever. It's certainly not something anybody sane would say. Was it the voices in your head again?

You got any kind of proof that this was said to you?

[blooming lotus]

gawd you're a troll to be proud of. are you a closet lesbain with a consitution issue or just your average as*hole not willing to play nice????


either way serpent, If I get to Sydney, I'm visiting for a spar and when I kick your as* or you realised I have... you 're going to stfu..... wa*ker.... see ya when I get there, and train, beacuse if there's a point, I'm taking it.

[Serpent]

So you don't have any proof whatsoever of what you just claimed then? There's a surprise.

And you keep calling me a troll?

[blooming lotus]

what do you want ??? ... a freakin air ticket??? but believe me, I'm training to execute points on your as* and I'll see ya when I get there........

oh you mean the lesbian thing??? no , reformed lesbian / bi - girl myself and I see your hard as* out there so I'm comming for it.

cheers.


you have some weeks to train, be vigilant.

[Toby]

Originally posted by blooming lotus
oh you mean the lesbian thing??? no , reformed lesbian / bi - girl myself and I see your hard as* out there so I'm comming for it.You love making us laugh, don't you?! Why oh why do you provide such golden information for us? How can we not use it?

BTW, was that comming or coming?

[Serpent]

Originally posted by blooming lotus
what do you want ??? ... a freakin air ticket??? but believe me, I'm training to execute points on your as* and I'll see ya when I get there........

oh you mean the lesbian thing??? no , reformed lesbian / bi - girl myself and I see your hard as* out there so I'm comming for it.

cheers.


you have some weeks to train, be vigilant.
What planet are you on?!

I was asking for proof of the people begging you to stay. But of course, as you can't provide it, you go off on some random tangent.

No one asked you anything about lesbians and no one cares about your sexuality. *shudder*

As for coming for me (note correct spelling), I'd probably smell you a mile away. The only surprise would be that you actually did something that you claimed you were going to do.

[blooming lotus]

try WONT provide it, if you can't find it on the treads your super sluething self.

Anyway.

Vashs' thread. so what work Vash, specifically are you lining up and do you plan to study more later???

goddammed angry at the world "oh so mighty " butch dykes :rolleyes:

[Serpent]

Originally posted by blooming lotus
goddammed angry at the world "oh so mighty " butch dykes :rolleyes:
Anger leads to hate, hate leads to suffering. The dark side this is.

I thought you were Buddhist?

[blooming lotus]

glad you understand the whole detriment of the hate thing and you're right - it's not worth it. Besides, I've had a many an angry bull-dyke friend in past and really it's between you and yourself.
But while we're hashing it out, unless you are prepared to post a photo of yourself ( now we accept you may be female ) and leave yourself open to the same comments you make about me, please control yourself. At least I had the guts to do it.

[Toby]

Originally posted by blooming lotus
... now we accept you may be female ...Wtf? You actually had me laughing out loud! Where did this come from? Serpent's a chick?! What'd I miss? :confused: :D :D

Come on Serpie, what other skeletons in your closet? :D

Serpent, the angry bull-dyke :D.




Eyebrows, have you been hitting the rice wine again?

[Serpent]

Yeah, at what point did "we" start thinking I could be a chick?! Those voices in your head are drowning out reality again, bl.

[blooming lotus]

oh deny it then hero. In the mean time we'll just wait for your pictures to be posted. If you were ever going to put up this just might be the time .

[Toby]

Bwahaha! Serpent, I think Eyebrows wants a photo of the imaginary female you for her album of angry bull-dyke photos. For late at night, "BL time".

[blooming lotus]

nice 2 for Toby but I'm just calling real time... put up with a photo serpent and post a guy pretending it's you foresaking the very thing your bull dyke anger was built on , or show us who you really are and admit, you a fock load more disturbed than you wanted to admit prior. As far as I am concerned you are nothing and much as I hate to say, my closest academic competition now ford's off the scene is Ironfist and Toby. PUT UP ALREADY OR RAVE FROM THE PEAnut gallery! Either way , ms. couldn't accept the challenge.

God dammed unhappy in your own skin shyte......... you 're pis*ing me off now , grown or what??!!??

[Toby]

So this is the psychoanalysis that you kept holding back? That Serpent's a chick? Well, at least I can say it took me by surprise and it takes a fair post for you to surprise me these days. Nice.

Originally posted by blooming lotus
As far as I am concerned you are nothing and much as I hate to say, my closest academic competition now ford's off the scene is Ironfist and Toby.Yay! Iron and me are almost Eyebrows level! Wait'll I tell my mum! She'll be so proud ... :p

[Meat Shake]

"my closest academic competition now ford's off the scene is Ironfist and Toby"

But you cant even type a coherent paragraph...

[blooming lotus]

great come back , and speaking of aptitude and intellect :rolleyes:

[Meat Shake]

That wasnt a comeback, that was a honest statement.

[blooming lotus]

I'm not getting into another to - fro thing about my english nor my typing. Besides, what exactly does that have to do with Serpent and his / her sexuality and or persuasion?? So much for credibility coming from providing verifiable evidence to support your claims :rolleyes:
EG :- like Serpent being female / male ( not that she/ he has ever denied either way ). I think Serpent, for all of his/her apparent expertise, is one of the only regular posters in our discussions that has never come through with pictures. Go figure blind faith. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm about to post some of that apparently elusive evidence and win me a dimmak argument.

[Toby]

I've got a pic of Serpent. She's the one in front :D.






































j/k - apologies in advance.

[blooming lotus]

if my kid was in fact Serpent, she'd be grounded for a week. no. a year. At least you have one of me, drawn on eyebrows and all. And yourself Serpent??

[Toby]

I reckon her silence is a sign that you're right, Eyebrows ;).



*Opens up another jerry can, pours on petrol, sits back with beer in hand*

[blooming lotus]

then again, she could just be busy and because we're all generous kinda folk, we'll just give her the benifit of the doubt 'til she arrives ha.

[Serpent]

Ah, thanks for your generosity in waiting. Frankly, I don't care what you think I am, because you're only stirring up all this bollocks about me being a chick in order to deflect some of the heat from yourself. It won't work - everyone still knows you're a complete nutcase. I could put up a photo of anyone. What would it prove? Besides, it's far funnier to leave to you foaming at the mouth, convinced you're onto something!

:D

[blooming lotus]

and god forbid giving you credit for honesty. You can lie to yourself all you like as far as I'm concerned, but if we're talking professional evaluation, It's me that'd be evaluating you.

Peace shim boy

[blooming lotus]

if i even had a ***** I just might be really offended.

say what you will. you know I 'm older and 've studies since you were in nappies. and further ,they were some nice words I gave you regarding your brother.

and with such potential the guy turns biggot :( :rolleyes: :cool:

what ever gets you through ..........

[Toby]

Originally posted by Vash
And BL ... you suxors balls ...If she wasn't on ignore you would've seen she prefers lemons :D.

[blooming lotus]

I'd say only to eat, but since that'll incriminate me further, I'll just remain qiuet.

[Serpent]

Actually, I would say that bl is a lemon, but there you go.

And now, if it will shut you the f up, here's a picture of me. Proof that I'm a man. Maybe you'll also see why I was trying not to make myself public...

[Toby]

:eek: It's Eyebrows' dad! So this whole thing between you is just a family feud?! At least we know where she got her looks from ...

[Serpent]

Oh, and by the way:


Originally posted by blooming lotus


and with such potential the guy turns biggot :( :rolleyes: :cool:

what ever gets you through ..........

big·ot Pronunciation Key (bgt)
n.

One who is strongly partial to one's own group, religion, race, or politics and is intolerant of those who differ.

So not only are you incapable of spelling it, you don't know what it means either. You are the best English teacher in the asylum, aren't you!

[blooming lotus]

way to avoid the question gutless. That's okay. Not putting up when asked by fellow posters noted. Just don't ever ask proof from any else here . Umkaay.:rolleyes:

[Serpent]

Originally posted by blooming lotus
way to avoid the question gutless. That's okay. Not putting up when asked by fellow posters noted. Just don't ever ask proof from any else here . Umkaay.:rolleyes:
Proof of what, you fvcking idiot? That I'm not a chick? You're the only one here with some bizarre presumption that I am a chick. And as for not posting proof, you are truly the blackest pot. There is no need for me to prove whether I'm male, female or a mangy horse. My posts speak for themselves and If I ever claim anything, I try to back it up with evidence.

You, on the other hand, say all kinds of bollocks and then refuse to back it up because you're too much of a genius and we should all accept the ideas that you "logicise".

[Goldenmane]

The last couple of pages of this thread have been the funniest stuff I've read here for ages.

I know you're not supposed to laugh at the mentally ill, but still...

[blooming lotus]

the only reason this mentally ill thing came up was because a while back I told the forum of a dodgy report and an over - exaggerated bout with low carb experimentation. Run with it if you need to change the subject.
And yah Serpent, your posts speak for themself. End of discussion.

[rubthebuddha]

vash -- start a new thread about your greatness. this thread has turned into sheer asshattery.