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Becca
10-02-2004, 03:11 AM
SPJ got me thinking about the mind games and stratagy side of most styles. yes, I know this has been covered a billion times....

Many parents enroll thier kids in martial arts "to give them discipine." But what about the mental discipline adults need in order to get through thier daily lives? And what of the other benifits of mental training. This is were I'm comming from: Last Thursday, sifu gave us his usual lecture durring end-of-class meditation. His topic was about how to use the lessons of sudden action from a relaxed state, that it can be used for both martial and non-marial applications. And for both physical and non-physical ones, as well.

One of the most valuable lessons of animal-based martial arts is the training of the mind to go from a peasfull state to a gaurded state with no notice. From this state, one can quikly assess the situation and react properly with reflexive speed. It is the ability to react to a freind walking up and punching you: you can identify the strike as a freindly game and not an attack ment to harm you. The mental training that went into this can be used to keep one out of a confrontation with Joe-Schmo on the street, as well. Sound about right?

Ok. What if you used this discipline in consert with the mental side of sparring? Would this help one navigate a nasty work environment with less hostility from co-workers? Could you see the attack on your work performance, analize it for true threat, weed out the BS your boss will likely ignore, then create a stratagy to take the teeth out of the attack without further antagonizing the SOB into continuing the attack?

SevenStar
10-02-2004, 04:48 AM
Originally posted by Becca

Ok. What if you used this discipline in consert with the mental side of sparring? Would this help one navigate a nasty work environment with less hostility from co-workers? Could you see the attack on your work performance, analize it for true threat, weed out the BS your boss will likely ignore, then create a stratagy to take the teeth out of the attack without further antagonizing the SOB into continuing the attack?

Thie thing about work is that you HAVE to put up with the BS. when the marketing dept tells me about an idiotic change they wanna make to the website, I can't pursuade them otherwise, nor can I tell them not to do it. When the isht hits the fan because said idea was stupid, the only negotiating you can do is trying to keep the fire off of your arse as well...

That said, however, there are certain aspects of discipline you can use. I'm always calm under fire, whether my arse is burning or not. Several people comment on the fact that no matter how hectic a situation seems, I'm always calm and tell them that whatever portion of the project I've "voulnteered" to do will be done. I never really gave thought to it until one day a coworker said that that ability probably came from my MA training.

Becca
10-02-2004, 05:03 AM
Nicely put 7*! :) I guess I'm trying to go a bit deeper than that; right down to the line of "That little b!ch is trying to pass one of her f-up off as mine! And the boss seems to be falling for it. What now???"

I do fine when it's not "personal" but I really get stressed when that one toxic co-worker discides to take the normal BS to this lower/higher level of interoffice trash...

I have already found a gem from this train of thought. That one should not worry about what one has no control over, but rather to controll how it impacts one's life. It helps in the long run, but I still get rattled in the short run. I've also noticed that several points of view can help put things into perspective, hence this thread.

That, and I'm board out'a my mind. My interesting work is done and now I'm trying to keep awake through the last 2 hours of grave-yard shift while filling DOT logs....

SevenStar
10-02-2004, 05:30 AM
Originally posted by Becca
Nicely put 7*! :) I guess I'm trying to go a bit deeper than that; right down to the line of "That little b!ch is trying to pass one of her f-up off as mine! And the boss seems to be falling for it. What now???"

I know that situation all too well! when that happens, people go into CYA mode. Here's one of the things that was happening to us - either a business owner or a marketing person would make a request for a change to some part of the site. We would make the change, but before we could load it, they had to approve it. All of this was done via phone, word of mouth, email, etc - we had no paper trail of what had transpired. So, three weeks later when said person's manager noticed the change hadn't loaded, the first thing they would say is "sev and his group never loaded it" and the next thing you know, our butts are burning.

The person never once said that we never loaded it because they never approved it, and even when we brought it up, we couldn't prove them wrong. So, we had to institue some "self defense training" for ourselves. we implemented a system where the requestor would put a request into our queue. the queue would send out emails at each stage of the request's progress, with a time and date, that way, if someone dropped a ball on the request, we knew who and when.


I do fine when it's not "personal" but I really get stressed when that one toxic co-worker discides to take the normal BS to this lower/higher level of interoffice trash...

understandable. Why do you think that co-worker is doing that?

Becca
10-02-2004, 06:48 AM
Originally posted by SevenStar
The person never once said that we never loaded it because they never approved it, and even when we brought it up, we couldn't prove them wrong. So, we had to institue some "self defense training" for ourselves. we implemented a system where the requestor would put a request into our queue. the queue would send out emails at each stage of the request's progress, with a time and date, that way, if someone dropped a ball on the request, we knew who and when.

Yep. Almost to a "T" what's happening to me. She said I wasn't putting the highest priority stuff first, Her proof was that the check-off sheets that were suposed to accompany the work order wasn't filed. Easy enough to proove her wrong, but I get so sick of it, day after day after day.:mad: As to why? I refused to back her up about another department "stealing" our overtime. No one in our group wanted the overtime; someone had to do it, Right? But they weren't on "Our overtime sign-up". She's been trying to get me fired ever since. It's not working but that doesn't seem to deture her a bit.

I have discovered a way to keep it from bugging me long term, thanks to Sifu's little pep-talk. You know how you deal with the sore looser in a sparring match? works remarkably well against p*ssy co-workers too. I am trying to see if any other parts of the mental side of training will help me not get so flustered every time she stabbs me in the back.

SPJ
10-02-2004, 05:47 PM
I know this thread is about how to deal with coworker and boss in the workplace.

I like the title: brain food or brain fu or Gong Fu for brain--.

As far as strategy goes,

A royal at Wu Kuo once told Sun Tzu that if you want to win all the time, you will lose. (Qiu Seng Bi Bai)

And if you protect yourself all the time, you will win. (Zi Bao Bi Seng)

This royal also taught him how to play Chinese chess on a board of 19x19 lines. Each point is Yin or Yang. There are total 361 (19x19) changes.

To change is the key to win.

There is time to fight. There is time not to fight. There is time to avoid fighting. There is time to wait and do nothing.

The matter of time is in the control of the heaven (Tien Shi).

The circumstances that give rise to the conditions to win is called Di Li.

You have the hearts of the people, such as your soldiers, your aides, coworker and even your boss or superviser. This is called Ren He (harmony with people).

If you have the three: Tien Shi, Di Li and Ren He, you will win.

These three factors are called San He or Sam Woo (as in the cantonese sea food restaurant).

You fight or even do not fight only when you know you will win in the San He.

For example, Donald Trump, a billionare when 40. He borrowed a lot of money and turned a lot of profits in real estate in the 1980's.

The tax structure and banking changed in the 1990's. There was economic boom in the '90. But there never was another Donald Trump.

Part of his success is Di Li. (the tax favors of real estate debt by President Reagan. these were gone before the end of his 2nd term)

Part of his success is Ren He. He had many friends in the banking industries that were more than happy to loan him money on any new deals as soon as he could come up with.

Part of his success in Tien Shi. The timing was right.

So where are your San He or Sam Woo in your workplace?

Peace.

:D

Becca
10-04-2004, 11:28 PM
:cool: :D See, that's how you got me thinking on this level in the first place! You also got me out to the library to find something or Sun Tzu's work...

joedoe
10-04-2004, 11:41 PM
First bit of advice I can give, is that like sparring you shouldn't take things personally, and don't let emotion get into it. Once you do, you can lose control of the situation.

The other advice I have is derived from Sun Tzu. Never corner your enemy, because you will force them to fight for their life. Always give them a way out.

And the final bit of advice I can give, is that it is only a job. There are other jobs out there. :)

Becca
10-05-2004, 04:12 AM
Yea, I know. I can handle that sort of thing. I'm exploring to see if any other part of my MA training can help me deel with it. I am *trying* to grow spiritually here!;) :D Seriously, though. This is mostly retorical; a big game of "what if."




'Cause I ain't leaving a job I enjoy just because I don't get along with one office harpie. I will likely end up at job I don't like nearly as well and have to deel with a whole new office harpie, 'cause they are everywere.:mad: