Kid picked on. Should I turn him towards the martial arts?

[El_CLap]

There is a woman that I work with whose son is constantly picked on at school. Going to the authorities has not done anything. Ignoring them has not done anything. She says he's depressed about this and it's been going on for a while. She knows that I do martial arts and wants me to tell her about the martial arts. I'm not opposed to fighting, especially when you are twelve, but I am opposed to fighting in school and when you are more than likely outnumbered. Any ideas? Any advice?

[Sharky]

slyly try to meet him and see if he would take to learning ma well. i know when i feel it is time to have kids, they are gonna be like ninja power rangers, not to be f-ed with.

i think you should meet the kid and see what he's like.

"Spectacular immaculate raps massacre cats like dracula bats, I'm snappin yer back cos I'm attackin the wack, duckin yer rapid attack, **** packin a gat, the mechanic of rap'll give you panic attacks with his Satanical raps." - Guess who.

[Martial Joe]

Well if he gets into MA it isnt like it is going to save him.If he knows MA he isnt going to be able to use it effectively untill he has had a good amount of training which could take a long time which means a long amount of time continued to be picked on.You dont want to get confidence in him so he goes and gets his ass kicked.MA is a good idea but you need to point out to him what I said.He should become friends with big kids who can stick up for him also...

http://www.stopstart.fsnet.co.uk/smilie/lolup.gif IXIJoe KaveyIXIhttp://www.stopstart.fsnet.co.uk/smilie/lolup.gif
I am Sharky's main man...

[This message was edited by Martial Joe on 09-07-01 at 04:48 PM.]

[lotus kick]

Throught before action.

How well do you know this kid and the trouble he is in. He could be a compleat punk. Remember that all mother love their child, no matter how bad they are.

If this is trully a good kid, then you should do all you can to protect him.

[PHILBERT]

That isn't always true though. My mom blames me for everything, even when it isn't my fault. She thinks I go out and underage drink, party, do drugs and participate in huge orgies, and I have never done any of that. She doesn't think of me as an angel or righteous or anything like that.

PHILBERT

[LiLong]

i was picked on as a kid as well, even though my father had already tauhgt me judo. I eventually took up shotokan karate and now kung fu. Luckily i have never had to use my martial arts skills to harm anyone. I don't think the kid should learn martial arts to be able to beat up anyone, instead he will gain self confidence taht will emanate from his behavioral change; I believe this to be the result of any cultivation of the mind. Howevver you could probably have the same effect with getting the kid involved in a sport or artistic expression (of course martial arts is the best because it combines both). Just an insight really.

[Vankuen]

Let's assume that this kid is actually a good clean young man, and his only fault is not knowing how to deal with his situation.

Learning martial arts, will not only improve his confidence, but his physical stature, well being, and even his social skills! These in themselves, could possibly help him to rise from his situation, and hopefully change his outlook for the better for the rest of his life.

Of course his fighting skills will develop as well, maybe faster, mabye not so fast. However with proper guidance, he will learn the best way for himself.

I think that maybe the original posting individual, if he feels so inclined, could go and meet with the young guy, and possibly give some "brotherly advice". Obviously there is some empathy there as he wouldn't be posting on here. It shows good character in my book. Helping people is of good virtue, and a quality that should be in all martial artists, and people in general.

So in a nutshell...martial arts can only help one, so long as he is guided properly.

"From one thing know ten thousand" - Miyomato Musashi, Book of five rings

"Loy lau hoi sung, lut sau jik chung"

[wingchunwsl]

i don't think there's really a solution. i've been picked on and still am sort of. all he can do is wait and be passive. if he gets in a fight, it'll get worse and if he tells some sort of authority and the bullies find out, he'll get in trouble too.
what kind of bullies? i'm not being racist here but it depends on who they are. those wannabe hard asian guys never seem to back down but white guys seem to get tired of picking on the same person later. i dunno maybe it's just me. :rolleyes:

[wingchunalex]

in the wing chun rules of conduct (i know the yip man lineage and mine have them), it saise- protect the weak and the very young, use martial skill to better the community. so i think the kid at least need to know how to defend him self.

know yourself don't show yourself, think well of yorself don't tell of yourself. lao tzu

[El_CLap]

I have arranged to have him meet a friend of mine who will train him. Not in Wing Chun at first, but basic boxing and fighting tactics.

[Martial Joe]

I have a salution that may help him without fighting...he can become friends with the kids,he just has to figure out how...

http://www.stopstart.fsnet.co.uk/smilie/lolup.gif IXIJoe KaveyIXIhttp://www.stopstart.fsnet.co.uk/smilie/lolup.gif
I am Sharky's main man...

[El_CLap]

Ahh. The old "If you can't beat them, join them" attitude. That'll do wonders for him. I'll be sure to pound that into his skull.

[nobody]

in fact i have been picked on a few times, but who hasnt. what he needs is confidence.