light sabres in Toronto

[whippinghand]

For all interested in knowing if Torontonians make there own light sabres.... In fact, we do. There is a huge industry in Toronto for these weapons... You can get them in various colors. Unfortunately, Import/Export laws do not allow us to ship out of the city. Sorry.

[Jeff Brown]

wait till you guys see my light-nunchuckus!

"Once I have harnessed the power of the Sun, I will be UNSTOPPABLE!" -- Mini-Me

[Watchman]

Shouldn't have deleted my post. :D

[Watchman]

Position Available Immediately: Apprentice Sith Lord, Dark Side Consulting Group

An unexpected position has opened up in the Dark Side Consulting Group for an Apprentice Sith Lord. The ideal candidate for this position would like galactic travel and possess a complete understanding of and competence with the Force, or demonstrate a willingness to learn.

Duties include: Performing competitive intelligence, hands-on intervention in support of the Sith Master's planning initiatives, ability to travel the galaxy widely, and operating a variety of laser-powered hand weapons and high-powered space/air vehicles. Some slaying of enemies of the Dark Side is also required, which may be performed using the Force or hand weapons.

Qualified applicants would possess good communications skills (especially when speaking in menacing whispers), and would be action-oriented individuals and risk takers. A background in study of the Force (light side or dark) is desirable, as would typically be acquired by those with advanced degrees or significant course work in Jedi Arts from the University of Coruscant. Applicants should also be familiar with holographic projection equipment, possess a valid galactic pilot's license (for all classes of ships), and must show a willingness to give in to their hate. A proven track record of using fear and/or Jedi mind tricks to control others is also desirable, as is the ability to speak several galactic languages.

Ideal candidates for this position would also have no children or other living relatives who are strong in the ways of the Force. (A new hire would be given several weeks to meet this requirement.)

Compensation for this position is commensurate with experience, and is extremely competitive for this field. Benefits include a generous severance package, a company starship, and a dark-colored clothing allowance.

The Apprentice Sith Lord reports to and works closely with the Sith Master, and experience in such small, team-based organizations is vital to the success of the master's plans. Discretion is also highly valued, as is the ability to see the future before it happens.

Applications will be accepted until the end of November. Transmit them holographically to: jobs@darkside.com .

[Jeff Brown]

Jedi Knight not a religion

Reuters News Agency


London — The Force will not be with you despite many Star Wars fans' registering their religion as Jedi Knight in this year's British census.

Officials said on Thursday that there is "absolutely no possibility" of Jedi appearing as a choice of religion on future census forms after officials created a code for Jedi to help them analyze responses to the 2001 population survey.

"Because a certain number of people were likely to have put Jedi Knight as a response to that question, it has been included as a code simply to help speed the forms through the machine-readers," a spokesman for the Office of National Statistics told Reuters.

"All that will happen is that it will be recorded as 'Other,'" he said. "It certainly does not mean it is recognized as a religion."

An e-mail campaign had circulated before the national survey in April aiming to persuade up to 10,000 people to enter themselves as followers of the science-fiction films' mystical faith — with its mantra "May the Force be with you."

The spokesman said it is up to Parliament to decide on what questions appeared in the next census, due in 2011.

"There is absolutely no possibility of it appearing on the census form," he said. "We will not be using taxpayers' money to publish how many people put 'Jedi' in."

[EmptyCup]

I cannot believe my eyes. For somebody who claims that he replies with one-liners because he doesn't like wasting space with more than the minimum replies needed, how the hell can Whipping Hand waste bandwidth by starting this???

You're a hypocrite :eek:

[Spectre]

I would post a reply on how I used to be with the Dark Side Consulting Group, designing and constructing my own light sabres, but I would probably just be told that my Jedi Mind Tricks suck and that I obviously do not understand the dark side.

Nice waste of bandwidth AGAIN children. You keep showing us your intelligence and maturity over and over again. :rolleyes:

[whippinghand]

When one finger points.....

[whippinghand]

If you guys have a problem with bandwidth, why not reduce your essays to paragraphs.