Too many compliments?

[Ryu]

My father and I were talking to some painters today who had done some Tae Kwon Do, and who were interested in martial arts. (Though maybe not the most realistic perspective...)
Anyway, they already knew I was interested in MA, and I mentioned (after they asked) that I dabbled in some BJJ, judo, and some JKD.

When my father was talking to them, he began talking about my skills (very flatteringly, bless his old heart) But he began to give the impression that I was a master of martial arts. :(
He said I had black belts in 3 arts, and studied the Gracie system and got belts in that.

!! Well JKD doesn't have "belts" and if you say an instructorship is equivalent to a black belt, then okay I guess that's true, but I don't consider my high belts in childhook karate anything special, and I am not a black belt in judo yet. I'm one under, at brown belt.
Now I studied BJJ with lots of people. I began with friends who studied it, then worked with Rickson and some others, then fought challenge matches to test myself over and over, then was with Carlos Machado's school for a year, but even though I guess you can consider this good study time, I did not get any belts higher than the white, though I was rolling with blues when I had to quit.
Even though he meant well and all, I had to constantly tone down the other guys's excitement and say "no no, well yeah, I have an instructorship, but... no no, I didn't get a black belt in BJJ. (holy crap! :eek: )
LOL, I always try to keep a low profile, and I try not to talk like I'm the coolest fighter in the world, because I don't think I am. There are plenty of good BJJ men out there who can take me, and probably fast.
Though I do know I'm no beginner.... :(
So I guess I am wondering if I don't give myself enough credit? This is kinda personal, but I have always had this strange fear of being a fraud... So I train as hard as I can with BJJ and judo, and JKD, etc to prove to myself that I'm not. I always used to think... "okay if I can join a BJJ school, stick with it, and roll with the best guys I will know I am good." Well I did just that, and the feeling didn't go away.
"Well if I get at least a brown belt in judo I'll know I am good." Didn't change a thing.
"Well if I get a black belt then in judo..." I betcha it won't change anything.
"Okay, if I can be an instructor in JKD, then I HAVE to accept that I'm good! I mean, heck, an instructor's certificate!" Didn't change.

LOL.

But now that I think of it...It's not just martial arts that I feel this in. In my writing ability... I get a story copyrighted and ready for publication.... I am not totally confident in my skills as a writer. People here and in University think I am "cool"..... and I wonder if I'm not. If I bowl 168 (a new sport I like :D) I think ......well it's not bad I guess...

There's a difference between being humble and being too timid of your abilities.
It's gotta be something with me I think.

Here's my history of grappling.
Started when I was 16.
Fought with guys in a garage full contact for 2 years. (that includes everything)
Went to a Rickson Gracie seminar, and actually got into a semi-fight with a kung fu guy (sorry, guys :( ) and won that.
Went to some Fabio Santos seminars.
Trained more and more with grappling friends also tutored under Rickson.
Got into a fight my senior year with a football player, slammed him on the ground, and won that (technically since it was broken up)
Finally started beating my grappling friends in the garage.
Moved.
Sparred with a guy who had been in the marines, and choked him out twice.(was a co-worker in Security)
Sparred with a 400 pound guy, and mounted easily, punches.
Got into a nasty self-defense situation when two security guards tried to "haze" me out when I quit. Won that with JKD zoning, and some grappling (ude garami, and yokoshihogatame)
Joined Carlos Machado's BJJ school, and sparred sparred sparred sparred sparred sparred and sparred for about a year.
Got into a fight at work, and took a guy down, mounted, etc. Won that.


.......( Sorry for the delay, the painters are back and talking now about how awesome Bruce Lee is and how he has a Tae Kwon Do expert friend who'se beaten up wrestlers and "maybe if he visits he can bring the sparring gear and go at it" I said "sure" and hoped he could teach me some Tai Chi since he knows that... but I'm not in the mood to talk about how tough martial artists are, and if some guy I don't even know does come to "challenge my BJJ" I'm gonna take him down and kill him. :mad:

You think it's only traditionalits who get these "brainless" challenges.. :mad:
I don't disbelieve that there are traditional stylists who are incredibly powerful, well trained, and good with the ability to do some scary things. BUT you better make **** well sure you're ACTUALLY that good before talking.

...... okay I'm calm now. :)
Anyway that was my point I guess. You can never take yourself TOO seriously, or think you're the best. Always someone better.

Okay, well this has been funny. I worked through it by myself as I usually do. :D
No one's gonna come to spar or fight, don't worry.
And even if they did I'd probably rather look at some taichi anyway.... unless he's a jerk....

in which case takedown, mount, punches, choke.

Later,
Ryu

http://www.kfccinema.com/news/12/zu2-05.jpg


"One who takes pride in shallow knowledge or understanding is like a monkey who delights in adorning itself with garbage."

[Watchman]

Went to a Rickson Gracie seminar, and actually got into a semi-fight with a kung fu guy (sorry, guys ) and won that.

Ryu, you promised you'd never mention that. :(

[Ryu]

LOL!!
Sorry Watchman ;)


(thanks for cheering up my mood, man) :)

Ryu

http://www.kfccinema.com/news/12/zu2-05.jpg


"One who takes pride in shallow knowledge or understanding is like a monkey who delights in adorning itself with garbage."

[Watchman]

No problem. :D

[Kung Lek]

Ryu

Our Human Resources officer where I work has a phrase...

"If you don't blow your horn nobody else will, just make sure you have a horn to begin with" :D

And that's the truth.

peace

Kung Lek

Martial Arts Links (http://members.home.net/kunglek)

[Goldenmane]

Ryu-

Interesting points to ponder.

In my limited experience, the feeling that one is not as good as one should be tends, in many cases, to drive one to develop one's abilities even more.

So how can this be a bad thing?

Well, it can be a bad thing if it leads to one being discouraged rather than driven, I suppose, and maybe it could lead one to an unrealistic self-analysis, but being the cynic that I am, I figure that any truly realistic self-analysis is likely to lead us to the conclusion that we aren't "there yet"...

What one does as a result of this conclusion is really what counts.

-geoff

-A hundred enemies, a hundred cups of wine. Infinite enemies, infinite wine.-

[Ralek]

Ryu beat up a kung fu guy!!!!! Kung fu really does suck.

TKD the real street lethal!!!!

[brucelee2]

Ryu,


The reason you are having this problem is that you are looking for validation outside of yourself. This is a an impossible and unfulfillable task. I highly recommend you check out the book "The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle. I think you would find it very interesting.

Go forward, my son, and
be like unto a torch
upon the darkness. Thou
are stripped now, of all
that was before. Look
not to thy fellow men
for guidance or
countenance- they canst
advise you no longer.
Thou shalt be as dust
now, and dust shall be
upon the tongues of thy
enemy. Verily, thou
shalt herald the coming
of the new age upon
man."

[Wongsifu]

you know ryu i find this also ,
2 points that get to me is that

1) Whenever somebody hears you know Martial arts its as if you have instantly implied he is a wuss and you could kick his ass. I used to get this all the time from my "friends" They used to feel like they should be intimidated because ive spent all my life learning M.A . IT suxs badly

2)knowing how good you are is only about setting goals, when i started i used to think when i get my belt i will be good, then stuff went wrong and i never got that belt , not my bad the school went MCMCMCMCdojo . After i left and changed style i was much better i knew was good because i was better than anyone at my old school.
After i started training professional i felt good because i was better than most teacers in my country. I know when my teacher comes back that he can make me best in my country, (btw my country is about half a million population and we have about 15 -20 M.A instructors but its still something)
But once i get that far i want to be better best.I want to be able to break any bone i hit from any angle with any part of my body , Then i will know for a fact i am as good as i want to be , but the problem is i wont feel that way or maybe the i will do who knows.

The problem is when what was far away and impossible becomes really possible you want more. Its like with cars , the faster it goes , the slower it seems it does

:D

what do bin laden and general custer have in common????
They're both wondering where the fu(k all of those tomahawks are coming from. - donated by mojo

[honorisc]

How many beans am I holding in my hand (right now).

See? You can't Know.

Will-o' the wisps.

Look-up! (cieling)--your expectations... Go outside (open air), Look-up! That's your training. (excet that not even the sky is the limit when you comprehend.~


I No_Know

Very some such, perhaps might have been, likely say some, some not.

[qeySuS]

hah wow :) i can totally relate to the "Being a fraud thing", i usually never mention MA to my friends unless i have to. Like when i cant meet them "I'm going to practice" -"practice what?" well i cant very well lie to them. I feel really uncomfortable when people get all excited talking about my MA training. Guess i just dont feel like i've reached the place where i can considder myself a martial artist and where i can say with a certain amount of certainty that i could beat most average joes with no training.

Only difference between the two of us being, i'm much more of a fraud then you are :D

Free thinkers are dangerous!

[Godzilla]

If you practice MA’s frequently you are a MA.

It doesn’t matter how good or bad you are. MA are not supposed to be able to beat everyone up. They are supposed to be able to defend themselves.

I remember in school I was the ‘high jumper’ on the track team. One day, while practicing, a student from the football team easily jumped over the height I was struggling with. That sucked!

But I was still the ‘high jumper’ on the track team. I practiced everyday after school and became the best I could. Sure, lots of people could jump higher than I could.

Fact is, all MA’s can be beat on any given day for various reasons. I don’t worry about being the best (never will) but worry about being the best I can.

Godzilla

[Nexus]

Ryu, indeed it seems you have begun to answer the question for yourself. Just keep in mind that it is good to set goals for yourself, and work towards those goals. Do not feel as if failure strikes you as a bad person, or that not fitting an image or vision that you have makes you any less of a person for whom you are today.

You are what you practice in life, not what you think of yourself in life. Think how many people study philosophy in college and walk around calling themselves philosophers, or study math and call themselves mathematicians. Do you think Plato was always debating with himself whether he was a philosopher or not, or Newton had trouble deciding if he was a mathematician? If you practice martial arts, you are a martial artist, that is not all that you are, but that is what you practice. Now, one thing to be wary of is by telling others that you are a martial artist, they may gather from that a concept of what they envision martial artists as rather then keeping it simple enough as 'that person practices martial arts'.

When someone asks me about taiji I point them towards taiji and not myself. When someone wants to know about martial arts, I direct them to the source, not the practitioner. If they ask me about myself personally then that is another matter.

- Nexus