True Mastery Approacheth (Way of Judo Katana Jitsu)

[Mega_Fist]

http://www.joaf.co.jp/isyo-kasou/katana/honkaku/jpg-honkaku/katana-honkaku-1-.jpg

point proven I think.



"the style is the powerful"

[rfbrown3]

And what point would that be Jethro?



Oh my goodness, I cannot believe I just replied to this thread, I swear to all of you, I am not a Sado-Masochist! Well not usually anyway. :rolleyes:

RFB

[choyleefat_604]

hahaha...now how does that even prove its a "judo katana"..???? all i see is a katana, a wakizashi and a tanto...where does it state its judo..??

[Mega_Fist]

My m8 Steven Rain said i needed to play hide the rainbow row but i was like wtf, then my m8 andy said like about these judo katans so i was like awesome omg.

Then my mate andy hooked me up with this baldhead girl but i was like wtf "you knew she was baldhead, you knew she had no **** hair i'm gonna get her with my judo katanas"

but anyway check the picture it proves there are katanas for judo !!!








"Life is for the living, but martial arts is life - the praying mantis uses its fangs for life, not death"

[David Jamieson]

lol.

Iaido is not part of judo, it is a different ryu entirely.

judo is sportive jujitsu.
Iaido is the sword arts
Karate is the striking arts

and so on, and so on.

The Japanese are very careful to categorize everything they can to ensure that even if you do get something wrong, your incorrectness will be limited to a given category.

They are not loosy goosy in the least about their martial arts. That strictly an american thing.

I think it's high time america just started it's own martial arts and calls them:

"the red carpet dancing twirling flinging screaming red white and blue punch/kick fest as overseen by deluded old men who think they are great masters of 100 years ago"

or something like that. :D

[Mega_Fist]

Right, my sensei (grandmaster Andy of the Takeshi judo squad) is soon to enlist in this forum to teach you boyz a lesson and maybe make you an offer you can't refuse. Here is a list of rules that will not be broken during his time:

1. You will refer to him as "Grandmaster Sensei" only.
2. You will respect the Judo tradition and the bushido code.
3. You will NEVER insult the ways of Grandmaster Sensei Andy.
4. You will not disrespect the traditions of John Takeshi.
5. You will end every question posted to him with "Thank you Sensei, I was foolish but you have made me more wise"

Number 5 on the list must be stated every time when talking to him. Things are going to change around here, I think the table's have turned.




"the man who hath the power of the shaolin is the tiger spiritual" Master Cheng

[SevenStar]

tell me you're not serious... especially about number 5.

[blackmantis]

What will happen if we ignore law 5?

[brothernumber9]

Isn't John Takeshi the actor that played Shang Tsung in the Mortal Kombat movie?

[Indestructible]

How do you demand Gong Sau in Japanese???? :D

[PangQuan]

HA!

1) He is not my Sensei.

2) I respect all martial backgrounds and traditions, your safe there.

3) This depends on his ways, if they are rediculous, prepare for insultation.

4) Sure, fine, why not.

5) Get real.

[David Jamieson]

whoppee! more trolls!

into the fire with them! :p

[Mega_Fist]

I don't think it is unreasonable to ask for you all to say "Thank you Sensei, I was foolish but you have made me more wise" after everything you say to him!

If Lao Tzu started posting you would give him some respect! In a similar way (because he's very similar in wisdom and spirituality and mind etc.) you should give Grandmaster Sensei Andy of the Takeshi Judo Katana tradition some respect.



"the lion may have the power, but what happens to the tiger is the mind of the spirituality"

[PangQuan]

if lao tzu started posting here i would die of laughter. one of his stature and enlightenment would never post on an internet forum.

tell you what, i will give your "grandmaster andy" the same respect i would give the mysterious lao tzu character, but only as soon as he gets a large portion of an entire culture to follow his teachings for a couple thousand years.

[PangQuan]

i get the feeling this grand master andy dude is just gonna be mega fist with a different account...

what every happened to red5angel....hmmmmm....hehe

[PangQuan]

Isn't John Takeshi the actor that played Shang Tsung in the Mortal Kombat movie?

that was Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa

[Wong Ying Home]

Is'nt the mega fist something that a lot of gay men engage in ??? :D

So far the person posting as mega fist seems to be somewhat anal in the posting he keeps making. !

[Mortal1]

mega fist

I must admit it went over my head at first but I have become a fan of your dry humour.

All I could say is thank you sensei I am foolish buit you have made me more wise!!!!! lolo I love it!

Your mate Andy lolol Genious!

[YouKnowWho]

"Thank you Sensei, I was foolish but you have made me more wise".When your Sensei spanks you with his wooden paddle, you should bounce like a fish and said, "Thanks, Sensei, I deserve that". (Sorry that I can't help here.) :D


1. You will refer to him as "Grandmaster Sensei" only.I could never respect anybody put their Phd title on their name card. One of my students had already declared himself as "grand master" several years ago and I don't know what that could make me into. Title (if it's important) should be given by somebody else and not by yourself.

When I was in Taiwan, I had an English class in a church during the summer season. The 1st day that every students had to introduce themself. I said, "I'm Mr. XYZ". Everybody was laughting at me. The English teacher then corrected me that "One should never call himself Mr." which I still remember even today.

[Mega_Fist]

Title (if it's important) should be given by somebody else and not by yourself

Andy's title as "Sensei Grandmaster" was given to him in 1997 by John Takeshi, a nunchuku and sai-sword expert and Judo Grandmaster.

As for point 5 on my list, I consider that to be the most important as it shows that you are willing to put all your trust in my mate Andy (which you should).

My mate Andy once beat up 10 people in a row, if that doesn't earn him the title of "Sensei Grandmaster" I don't know what does.



"the hare is faster than the leopard of the tiger spiritual"

[SimonM]

i get the feeling this grand master andy dude is just gonna be mega fist with a different account...

what every happened to red5angel....hmmmmm....hehe

Do you have reason to think that this guy is red5?

[YouKnowWho]

I know two guys, One who:

- holds 8th degree black belt in his style. When people asked him about MA. he always said, I just know a little and still need to learn more.

- has big kunckles on his fist. He always said that he used just 2 punches and knocked down somebody. He then humbly said, "I should be able to knock that guy down by one punch, I still need to train more."

Which guy do you want to be friend with?

[TaiChiBob]

Greetings..

I don't have to be faster than the Lion.. only faster than someone else in the same vicinity..

A man is judged by the quality of his character, not the publicity..

Be well..

[Mega_Fist]

I agree, it's sorta like that tale:

Once a dog found a bone and put it in his mouth. He then went down to the river and looked into it and saw his reflection. "Oh that dog has a much nicer bone than I have" the dog said, and as he opened his mouth to take the bone, the bone he had in his mouth fell into the lake and he was left with nothing!

[Mortal1]

lololol He beat up ten guy's in a row! Priceless!

[PangQuan]

Do you have reason to think that this guy is red5?

nope, i just hope some time red5 reads that.

[Mega_Fist]

Who is red5? I've already revealed my secret identity- "BlstyueTrave" Use your wisdom to work it out.

As for Sensei Andy, I demand that point 5 is carried out on the list or someone's in for a knuckle sandwidge.

[Slade]

LOL, he'll get the same ammount of respect as anyone else in here, if he cant deal with just being human and being humble like everyone else. He isnt nobodies master, only a master of ego.

[David Jamieson]

:rolleyes:

isn't there a crotty forum you guys can cavort and roll around and sniff each others bums in?

[Wong Ying Home]

I have seen fecal vomitting with more content than your postings

[SifuAbel]

Right, my sensei (grandmaster Andy of the Takeshi judo squad) is soon to enlist in this forum to teach you boyz a lesson and maybe make you an offer you can't refuse. Here is a list of rules that will not be broken during his time:

1. You will refer to him as "Grandmaster Sensei" only.
2. You will respect the Judo tradition and the bushido code.
3. You will NEVER insult the ways of Grandmaster Sensei Andy.
4. You will not disrespect the traditions of John Takeshi.
5. You will end every question posted to him with "Thank you Sensei, I was foolish but you have made me more wise"

Number 5 on the list must be stated every time when talking to him. Things are going to change around here, I think the table's have turned.
"the man who hath the power of the shaolin is the tiger spiritual" Master Cheng


"Thank you sesei, may I have another." Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
zhzahahahahahahahahahahahahahah cougth couch breath
bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha
oh ih ih my god bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

[Mega_Fist]

He isnt nobodies master, only a master of ego.

He is a master of enlightenment

[SifuAbel]

He is a master of donkey poo as far as we care.

[Mega_Fist]

YOU WILL OBEY RULE 3 ON THE LIST AND TREAT MY MASTER WITH RESPECT. I also expect you to post "Thank you Sensei, I was foolish but you have made me more wise" at the end of EVERY post that you send.

He has an IQ of 150 so he's way better than you!

[bodhitree]

grandmaster sensei
can't he even pick a language to use.

[SifuAbel]

YOU WILL OBEY RULE 3 ON THE LIST AND TREAT MY MASTER WITH RESPECT. I also expect you to post "Thank you Sensei, I was foolish but you have made me more wise" at the end of EVERY post that you send.

He has an IQ of 150 so he's way better than you!

LOL, make me. "Oh great and powerful fat sensei, give me your secrets on how to grow my belly to your formidable size." Bugger off, donk.

[Mega_Fist]

LOL, make me. "Oh great and powerful fat sensei, give me your secrets on how to grow my belly to your formidable size." Bugger off, donk.

Fat sensei? what? oh a joke...maybe?:confused: a bit confused... Anyway, who said fat is bad (Wang Shu Jin).

When grandmaster sensei arrives you WILL treat him with more respect or the blood hound gang will be on your doorstep.

[rfbrown3]

OK Cliff I now get it, your Grandmaster Andy is really your buddy from the bar where everyone knows your name! LOL!

When he finally signs on to the forum, I will greet him with the salutation, "NORM!" :D

Cheers,
RFB

[Samurai Jack]

Mega-Fist's mate shows us true judo power!

Be afraid, be very afraid! (http://www.matbattle.com/)

[PangQuan]

Be afraid, be very afraid!

Mega-Fist's mate shows us true judo power! (http://www.matbattle.com/articles/bjj/new_gay_judo.htm)

OMFG!!!! :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek:

from this point forward if i ever learn judo or bjj or anything like that. it will be from a woman.

[Mega_Fist]

Fat Sensei? What on Earth was that guy talking about?

[Lama Pai Sifu]

WTF? Can't the F*cking moderators due something about this, and the other idiots here? It's getting to the point that I don't even want to contribute any more.......

MODERATORS! Make a parody/comic section of the forum for these a$$wipes! This is just getting out of hand.

Attention NON-TROLLS~
PM the moderators and get this guy removed. It's just ridiculous.

[Mega_Fist]

I'm with you, I'm FED UP of people like SifuAbel posting jokes about "Fat Sensei" or whatever. Throw him out! I'm just so angry at all this trolling

[Liz C]

Andy's title as "Sensei Grandmaster" was given to him in 1997 by John Takeshi, a nunchuku and sai-sword expert and Judo Grandmaster.

As for point 5 on my list, I consider that to be the most important as it shows that you are willing to put all your trust in my mate Andy (which you should).

My mate Andy once beat up 10 people in a row, if that doesn't earn him the title of "Sensei Grandmaster" I don't know what does.

And yet you don't refer to him as "Sensei Grandmaster"... or is "mate Andy" a translation I'm not familiar with?

[Mega_Fist]

I'm allowed to call him my mate because I'm 4th Kyu in Takeshi Judo. Anyone else must call him "grandmaster sensei" or "enlightened one".

[bodhitree]

mega fist
your teacher is a mulleted, egotistic with no reason for it, out of shape slob., opps, i mean yes 'mastersensei'

[bodhitree]

his trolling, for calling fatty fat!
yes master sensei

hahahahaha :D :D :D :D :D

[Mega_Fist]

I just don't understand how he is fat? He is quite slim. What on Earth is that guy talking about when he says Fat Sensei? I just find the whole thing very confusing.



"the fool is the essence, the spiritual is the tiger"

[Anthony]

Lama Pai Sifu:

I agree, and actually haven't contributed here for a while. Contribute to what.....the stupidity? The trolls are taking over this site like termites. What can we expect though. I mean look....this idiot "mega fist" starts a thread and its on the top of the forum. People just can't resist responding to nonsense. This is like one of three TCMA publications out there and it's sad that the discussion forum is overrun with this type of stupidity.

[Mega_Fist]

Yeah? If I'm stupid then what is "Sashimi"? Don't know? Not suprised; Sashimi is a type of Japanese cuisine that involves raw fish.

Maybe you'll learn something if you listen to someone with something to say.

[Mega_Fist]

I have talked to the right honerable grandmaster Andy and he has agreed that point 5 on the list may (in some exceptional circumstances) be substituted with,

"Oh enlightened one, you teach me as a father teaches his offspring"

[SifuAbel]

Oh geez. Now I know you are either really messing with us or you are out of your kangaroo eating mind. :rolleyes:

[Mega_Fist]

Right I'm FED UP of nobody taking me seriously. Why are you all so quick to mock and criticise!?!? Might It occur to you that I actually have somethiing important to say!?

"The true dragon tolerates the tiger" Ancient saying

[gwa sow]

because 69 post and not a good one in all of them

[Mega_Fist]

because 69 post and not a good one in all of them

Oh and what makes a "good post" if you're there with your rule book? In my opinion a good post is a thought provoking suggestion- due to the number of replies I would guess I have many good posts.

If you insult me again I'll get you banned as I am VERY good friends with the moderator.

[gwa sow]

"If you insult me again I'll get you banned as I am VERY good friends with the moderator."


ok how's this........YOU SUCK!!!!


waiting for ban.

[TenTigers]

Megafist, your father should have pulled out.

[Mega_Fist]

I will seek my vengeance, In this World or the next.

Probably this World and with a judo katana.

[bodhitree]

If judo katanas existed, which they didn't :rolleyes:

[Mega_Fist]

Well maybe they didn't but they do now coz my mate Andy has one.

"No he doesn't because they don't exist and I don't know anything" I hear you cry.

Want proof? http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/6/6f/Katana-Dresden.jpg

Point proven methinks.

[PangQuan]

Oh jeez, I thought that looked more like a bowling katana to me...

I guess its a judo katana...

[Mega_Fist]

I guess its a judo katana...

At last someone accepts the existence of a judo katana. My school uses judo katana and judo yumi (which is a bow) methods. My mate Andy explained the training methods he used when training with Master John Takeshi:

Andy would stand in judo crane stance blindfolded. Sometimes he would have to wait for hours. Then suddenly John Takeshi Sensei would fire an arrow from his judo yumi and Andy would draw his sword, deflect the arrow and then go back into crane stance and the waiting game would begin again...

[TenTigers]

Does Grandmaster Andy also know the Chinese Nunchuku? I saw in a magazine a Kung-Fu guy who is now a master of the "numchuks" because he was inspired by Bruce Lee movies. Gene will back me up on this. Did you also know that the Yo-Yo was originally a Phillippino weapon? Well that being said, I have research that also shows that what we now refer to as a hacky-sack was once a weapon used by the most skilled Chinese Assasins, the Lum Gwai.-Lin Kwai in Manderin, who were the forunners of the Ninja. Basically, what I'm saying is I have an entire toychest full of weapons at my disposal in which I can soundly defeat,nay, Trash your silly Grandmaster and his judo katana.

[bodhitree]

if i do boxing and buy a katana does it make it a boxing katana?
dude, why do you keep coming here?

[PangQuan]

Hi.

I know Andy Judo Grandmaster. That is not his Judo Katana, that is his toilet katana. He keeps it near him when he goes poo. just in case he gets attacked by judo grandmaster hating ninja's.

Andy Judo Grandmaster and I go way back.

[Liz C]

Right I'm FED UP of nobody taking me seriously.

Does that mean you'll go away now?

[bodhitree]

good idea liz, or he should come back with a different name so he can act like grandmasterSensei has more than one fan here ;)

pangquan
he may also use the judo katana for unclogging the toilet.

[EarthDragon]

Mega fist,
come on man, how COULD anyone take you seriously? your posts are ridiculous.

if you put crap out there on the boards, crap will come back. if you make some serious posts then the members will respond accordingly. be well

[Mega_Fist]

Toilet humour, very low indeed.

My posts are very serious. I don't understand why people can't accept me, I'm beggining to think it's racism.

Anyway, if any of you actually want to discuss the evolution of karate martial arts with me instead of just trying to be cool by slagging me off then it would be good to hear from you.

Grow up, I mean honestly.



"the power of the tigress is the leopard in the spiritual" Sifu Andy-sensei

[SifuAbel]

Please don't feed the trolls. MF is either an attention starved kid, mentaly challenged, or bi-polar.

Either way its a short circuit. Don't bother. :rolleyes:

[Universal Stance]

It's hilarious how you guys continue to entertain him. This Judo katana has to be one of the funniest things I've read on these forums.

I have to keep from laughing out loud here at work.

I would like to battle your sensei's Judo katana with my paired 220lb Super Dragon Wing Chun Meteor Hammers.

Any time, any place...in Jersey around 4pm.

[EarthDragon]

I kinda feel bad for the guy, perhaps he is trying to be serious, or perhaps he is just an a$$ and making me look foolish for caring and wasting everyones time.

I have spoke with/ran across some martial arts lovers/wanna try's that were just misinformed and had a hard time understanding the basics.

But maybe its just the teacher in me trying to look out for those who havent a clue and should be taught correctly.

then again mega fist might be just a troll with a warped sense of humor and somehow finds entertainment in his posts....

judo katana? can anyone be that dumb?

[Universal Stance]

"the power of the tigress is the leopard in the spiritual" Sifu Andy-sensei

I take that back....this is the funniest.

[blackmantis]

Megafist could be serious? It is surely possible that he is making an effort and is just incredibly misinformed. Perhaps we should be more civil towards him?

I've never heard of a Judo Katana, but perhaps he is just confused or something? We should probably be more accepting and tolerant to this guy even if he does seem rather foolish...

Perhaps we should give him a chance?

[Mega_Fist]

Misinformed? At least I've got one mate.

Anyway, at least you're not being a total loser so a bit of respect to you (you seem more spiritual than most people on this forum).

I'm also really cultured because I listen to classical music, watch foreign cinema, read general literature, go to art galleries and write philosophy.

[SifuAbel]

yep, a nutbar

[rfbrown3]

You know at first I thought we were dealing with someone whose real name is Jethro Bodine who lived with his really rich uncle Jed, his granny and a cousin named Ellie Mae in Beverly Hills but they all were originally from the hills of Tennessee. I was sure that "Jethro" had wanted to be at one time or another a double-naught spy, a brain surgeon, a frogman, an astronaut, or a soda jerk and I guess now a days a master of Judo and of course all the associated weapons of Judo such as the Katana. :rolleyes:

However after giving it some serious thought, I finally decided that Mega_Fist is really a mailman named Cliff Claven living in Boston and who hangs around a bar where everyone knows your name, and that his mate, Judo grandmaster Andy is really a guy named NORM.

Who knows his real identity.

I agree that we have fed this troll enough. It has been fun and I have enjoyed it, really, but enough is enough, time to move on. No more from me concerning Mega_Fist and his mate, Judo grandmaster Andy. I have to go now to practice with my Shotokan straight sword and then after that my Ysing-Yi floor techniques. :D

RFB

[TenTigers]

Mega-Fist-you are very deep and involved in alot of things for someone of such a young age. You must be an old soul-perhaps even an old soul with alzhiemer's.
Let me ask you, what style of Judo does your mate Grandmaster Andy do? is it Japanese Kodokan Judo, Chinese Judo(suai-Jiao) or Spanish Judo? I learned Spanish Judo.

[Ultimatewingchun]

The first post on this thread stating the 5 "requirements" was a brilliant example of HYPNOTIC SUGGESTION...and it's been amazing to see how many people bought into it, ie.- were affected by it to some degree or another (it doesn't matter whether you thought it was cool or thought it was ridiculous - the fact that you responded shows the effectiveness of the first post).................


Hint: By HYPNOTIC SUGGESTION I mean that commands were given for absolute obedience to the WILL of the poster.

[SifuAbel]

oh geez.............. :rolleyes:

[Fourcorners]

Magefist, you make your teacher, school, and students look foolish with all this. Respect must be given in order to get it. On the net every one is on equal ground until they open thier mounths and make it known they are foolish or wise. I read this and it was only good for a laugh. if you or he was real about this you crippled him severly just be assocaition. You disrepect anyone that has every taught you because of your ego. let it go.

[TenTigers]

Megafist-I feel thatyou are blowing this way out of proportion. Your Grandmaster Andy could not be nearly as good as you say. Spanish Judo is far superior than anything you or your ridiculous Grandmaster Andy could ever hope to achieve, as you are well aware of, since you did not reply to my previous posts once I have mentioned that I studied it. You realise the inferiority of your claims as well as those of you're supposed Grandmaster.
My work here is done. :p

[Mega_Fist]

Right TenTigers, because I am merciful I will forgive your foolishness. Grandmaster Andy however was greatly offended when I reported that his school and tradition is being mocked by a bunch of losers.

To answer your question we practise Takeshi Style Judo which has close links to Wing Chun and Capoeira. We practise a variety of weapons but I specialise in the three-section staff.

[Samurai Jack]

Isn't the famous musician and former star of "Baywatch", David Hasselhoff (http://www.happytechfreak.com/pictures/hasselhoff_2003-07-27.jpg) the Soke Great Judo Grandmaster of Teshi style?

I hear that in addition to the Judo Katana, he's also got a Judo Mobile! (http://www.azoidx.com/postimages/Hasselhoff_coleman.jpg)

Not to mention some amazing Judo mind-tricks! (http://www.kvak.com/slike/200105b.gif)

Thank you great Grandmaster Sensei. We humbly await your enlightened reply.

[Mega_Fist]

Please keep your fantasies about David Hasselhoff to yourself- they have no place here. However, I am greatful for the respect you have shown.

"I was just watching the Matrix the other day..." said my mate Steve, "Oh, that's a bit sad really- I only really watch foreign cinema" Me.

This dialogue proves how sophisticated I am.

[bodhitree]

Misinformed? At least I've got one mate.

Anyway, at least you're not being a total loser so a bit of respect to you (you seem more spiritual than most people on this forum).

I'm also really cultured because I listen to classical music, watch foreign cinema, read general literature, go to art galleries and write philosophy.


A real renissance man. you proclaim yourself cultured. great.


and for your racism claim, yeah, race is the reason we think your incredibly foolish and full of $hit.

I don't even know what race you are, oh but you do keep me laughing! I'm a librarian, i hae my librarian katana :D :D :D

[Mega_Fist]

i hae my librarian katana :D :D :D

"I hae my librarian katana", what on Earth are you on about?

[PangQuan]

As I stated before I have known Andy for quite some time.

We trained together as children high in the Appalachian mountains, under the mysterious Judo Monk, Bong.

I remember those days they were fun....well for me anyhow. Andy never really could keep up with me in those days.

He had a difficult time learning the subtleties of our great grand masters art. Such as fighting on the tree tops, Andy would always fall. But of course I expected such from my, um, younger judo brother.

I fondly remember many a time picking up a weeping Andy from the forest floor and giving him one of those brotherly pep talks.

"Now andy, crying wont help you any" I said, "you need to climb back up that tree and fall again, till you dont fall no more" I explained.

This was the turning point in Andy's training. This happened silmultaneously as our master was dying due to several bullet holes in his head from nazi invaders.

For the next several years, I took young andy under my wing and finished teaching him our masters lessons.

I attribute all of Andy's skill to my single handedly raising that pup from a sniveling baby to the judo grandmaster he is today.

I how ever cannot feel impressed by Andy's skills as they will never truly compare to mine, I always was several steps ahead of that kid.

Now you all know a little about the foundation of Andy Judo Grandmaster.

:eek: :eek: :D :p

[Chinwoo-er]

You guys actually like feeding trolls don't you ?
Just wait until the sun rises, and they will turn to stone ! :D

[bodhitree]

:D
Please keep your fantasies about David Hasselhoff to yourself- they have no place here. However, I am greatful for the respect you have shown.

"I was just watching the Matrix the other day..." said my mate Steve, "Oh, that's a bit sad really- I only really watch foreign cinema" Me.

This dialogue proves how sophisticated I am.
:D

YES SO SOPHISTICATED :D :D


""I hae my librarian katana", what on Earth are you on about?"

obviously it's a type O, the V is not in the word have. Can't figure that out yet so sophisticated.

Pang
you really inspired Judo master andy because I see him floating in treetops all time.

[PangQuan]

Ya, it was similar to the big brother program.

One time he fell down and scraped is knee. he was in some pain, but then i just looked at him and said "Andy, get your lazy ass up and practice" I think that one was a major point of enlightenment for him. As they would say, Satori, he definately woke up from his dream.

At that he got a band aid and started climbing again.

[Mega_Fist]

As I stated before I have known Andy for quite some time.

We trained together as children high in the Appalachian mountains, under the mysterious Judo Monk, Bong.

I remember those days they were fun....well for me anyhow. Andy never really could keep up with me in those days.

He had a difficult time learning the subtleties of our great grand masters art. Such as fighting on the tree tops, Andy would always fall. But of course I expected such from my, um, younger judo brother.

I fondly remember many a time picking up a weeping Andy from the forest floor and giving him one of those brotherly pep talks.

"Now andy, crying wont help you any" I said, "you need to climb back up that tree and fall again, till you dont fall no more" I explained.

This was the turning point in Andy's training. This happened silmultaneously as our master was dying due to several bullet holes in his head from nazi invaders.

For the next several years, I took young andy under my wing and finished teaching him our masters lessons.

I attribute all of Andy's skill to my single handedly raising that pup from a sniveling baby to the judo grandmaster he is today.

I how ever cannot feel impressed by Andy's skills as they will never truly compare to mine, I always was several steps ahead of that kid.

Now you all know a little about the foundation of Andy Judo Grandmaster.

:eek: :eek: :D :p

This story is completely and utterly ficticious. I assume what has happened is that this guy has become jealous of Andy's skill and my spirituality and so has made up this story to try to compensate.

"You want some beer" said my mate Steve, "Oh, I only really drink wine from old-world countries" I replied.

I think this proves I'm sophisticated don't you?

[PangQuan]

You will have to face the fact that your master has withheld information from you regarding his past. This is not uncommon.

I do not hold your ingnorance against you, do not fret yourself grasshopper.

wine from old world countries? how un sophisticated. Now, had you said "wine from the old world" that may have been different.

[Mega_Fist]

OOOh so you're there with your "rule book" are you? You've got to chill out fascist, I hope you don't practise kung fu like that.

"Do you want to look at porn?" said my mate Steve, "I only really read Descartes" I replied.

That proves how clever I am.

[PangQuan]

These are the same rules your grand master andy grew up with pup.

simmer down there yippity.

[SifuAbel]

Nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnutbar

[Mega_Fist]

You mean a bar with nuts in it? Sad really, I only eat fairtrade food.

[bodhitree]

You are a true mark of high culture.

and your 'mastersensei' has a mullet.

[Mega_Fist]

"OI mate would you like to go to the Pantera concert next week?" Said my mate about 10 years ago, "Oh I'm sorry, it looks like I'm busy as Tony Harrison is doing a poetry reading in a trendy cafe in town" I replied.

General intelligence

[bodhitree]

Yes, so inteligent indeed.
so inteligent we should proclaim you grandmaster sensei and give you a mullet. We should say your the judo katana master. We dare not call you mate though, your much better than us being you only drink spirits from the old world.
Oh, and yes, we should definately take you seriously and be afraid.


Oh, and grandmaster sensei, yes, he is legit :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

Let me guess your next dialogue to prove your sophistication.

my mate, "don't you want to go to the trendy salon to get your haircut"
My reply " no i rather enjoy the mullet because its a party in the back but i don't get hair in my eyes"

this proves how sophisticated i am


-megafist

[Mega_Fist]

Yes, so inteligent indeed.
so inteligent we should proclaim you grandmaster sensei and give you a mullet. We should say your the judo katana master. We dare not call you mate though, your much better than us being you only drink spirits from the old world.
Oh, and yes, we should definately take you seriously and be afraid.


Oh, and grandmaster sensei, yes, he is legit :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D

Let me guess your next dialogue to prove your sophistication.

my mate, "don't you want to go to the trendy salon to get your haircut"
My reply " no i rather enjoy the mullet because its a party in the back but i don't get hair in my eyes"

this proves how sophisticated i am


-megafist

Mullet? Why are you talking about fish? That's a bid sad- I only really talk about intellectual non racist subjects

[SimonM]

wine from old world countries? how un sophisticated. Now, had you said "wine from the old world" that may have been different.

Pang Quan: I've found that the best wine producing regions these days are actually Chile and Australia. Wolfblass in particular is a delightful wine and their Yellow Lable Cabarnet is well worth a taste. Sadly it is not from the "old world". I'd be very tempted to put a few bottles down for five or ten years if I had a wine cellar. I don't and you can't get a good Cabarnet (or even a Pinot) in China.

[bodhitree]

Mullet? Why are you talking about fish? That's a bid sad- I only really talk about intellectual non racist subjects


Fish and bad hair are considered by most racist, you are correct.

( what a f***ing loon )

what race are you? (Asides from the obvious mongoloid and deuchebag )

this dude, wow.

[TaiChiBob]

Greetings..

Kudos to Mega_Fist.. he has masterfully reeled in the real mullets.. look at the attention and emotions he has goaded from people.. there is way too much irony in this thread.. amusing, but ironic none-the-less..

Be well..

[David Jamieson]

do you think he's masturbating while he reads the replies?

now there's a kink! :eek:

[Mega_Fist]

Fish and bad hair are considered by most racist, you are correct.

( what a f***ing loon )

what race are you? (Asides from the obvious mongoloid and deuchebag )

this dude, wow.

You're so racist, and I think it's spelled "Mongolian" not "mongoloid". Anyway, aside from the racial hatred this guy is promoting; it seems as if I've got off on the wrong foot with some people- I'm really a good guy. Let me tell you the following true story-

I was walking through town when I saw these losers trying to beat up a really fit babe. So instead of walking past which I bet most of you would do, I said to them "Oi Sado, your such a loser". They came over to me and I did a butterfly twist which knocked into all five of them. Afterwards the fit babe came over and said "you're so brave" and I simply replied "the true warrior is the mind of the spiritual".

I hope this proves to you all that I'm really a good bloke.

[bodhitree]

I meant mongoloid, a little different in meaning from mongolian, look it up, stupid.

Do you think duechebag means German?

[bodhitree]

true story :D
this thread makes me laugh so much, I love it. thanks megapus

[Universal Stance]

Ditto...

I actually look forward to it daily :D :D

[PangQuan]

Pang Quan: I've found that the best wine producing regions these days are actually Chile and Australia. Wolfblass in particular is a delightful wine and their Yellow Lable Cabarnet is well worth a taste. Sadly it is not from the "old world". I'd be very tempted to put a few bottles down for five or ten years if I had a wine cellar. I don't and you can't get a good Cabarnet (or even a Pinot) in China.

that was just a troll treat, i dont actually drink wine, or any other alcoholiic beverage for that matter...

:p

[Taatelipalmu]

MEGA_FIST, you are so sophisticated! I can't believe how these losers here can't see how great your Sensei Grandmaster Sifu Mestre Teacher, may-he-be-forever-exalted, is.

For you must be greatly advanced yourself, being a 4.kyu, after all!
Under no circumstances let these low-lifes insult Sensei Grandmaster!

Cause I can see what you say is true. I can see your master is truly a great martial artist.

Knocking out ten guys, unbelievable! And even you could save that woman! You must be pretty good yourself!

Yet these people keep insulting him... I hope he can show them some respect with his Judo Katana! I can come and help with my Capoeira Wakisashi, too.. Man, to hell with rationality! As the code of Martial Art written Lu-Tze says, attack anyone who dares offend your honour.

Oh, and where are your schools? I should like to follow in your footsteps and learn the ways of Grandmaster Sensei also.

Under no circumstances should you tolerate these imbecils here!

*bows deeply*

Oh, and since you too are asophisticated aintellectual like me, what do you think about the flutes in Bach's Toccata & Fugue? I think they are most amazing.

[PangQuan]

shut up megaf@rt


you dont need two personalities

[Taatelipalmu]

Chrissake, man. look at my post again. Sheesh, isn't it obvious enough??

[Universal Stance]

ROTFL!!!

It's amazing how many accounts a single person can make here.

[Taatelipalmu]

My feeble attempt at mockery has gone ignored?

[PangQuan]

red5???????????

[Mega_Fist]

MEGA_FIST, you are so sophisticated! I can't believe how these losers here can't see how great your Sensei Grandmaster Sifu Mestre Teacher, may-he-be-forever-exalted, is.

For you must be greatly advanced yourself, being a 4.kyu, after all!
Under no circumstances let these low-lifes insult Sensei Grandmaster!

Cause I can see what you say is true. I can see your master is truly a great martial artist.

Knocking out ten guys, unbelievable! And even you could save that woman! You must be pretty good yourself!

Yet these people keep insulting him... I hope he can show them some respect with his Judo Katana! I can come and help with my Capoeira Wakisashi, too.. Man, to hell with rationality! As the code of Martial Art written Lu-Tze says, attack anyone who dares offend your honour.

Oh, and where are your schools? I should like to follow in your footsteps and learn the ways of Grandmaster Sensei also.

Under no circumstances should you tolerate these imbecils here!

*bows deeply*

Oh, and since you too are asophisticated aintellectual like me, what do you think about the flutes in Bach's Toccata & Fugue? I think they are most amazing.

Thank you for your respect. I however find Baroque music a bit too mainstream and so only listen to the works of Tallis and Byrd.

[SimonM]

Chrissake, man. look at my post again. Sheesh, isn't it obvious enough??

Hey Red 5. You are the only capoerista I know here. ;) Welcome to Trolling 2005!

[bodhitree]

your grandmaster sensei shall now be called flabby mullet master 1
john tesh on a bad day can beat up John Takeshi(on his best day)2
flabby mullet master's way is the way of the flabby fist3
Judo and bushido shall be disrespected4
flabby mullet master shall be disrespected at every possible opprotunity5

You are so sophisticated (pseudo sophisticated)

did flabby mullet master teach you the act that helped you save the damsel in distress?

[Mega_Fist]

You are so sophisticated (pseudo sophisticated)

Haha the phrase "pseudo sophisticated" is truly pseudo sophisticated. Get an education and learn judo katana before you insult me again.

[bodhitree]

"Get an education and learn judo katana before you insult me again."
-megadope

I have an education and Judo katanas don't exist. How is the damsel in distress you saved you brave man? How is mullet flab master? working hard at being out of shape? What about John "opps i got beat up again" Takeshi?


oh, this guy.

[Mega_Fist]

"Get an education and learn judo katana before you insult me again."
-megadope

I have an education and Judo katanas don't exist. How is the damsel in distress you saved you brave man? How is mullet flab master? working hard at being out of shape? What about John "opps i got beat up again" Takeshi?


oh, this guy.

What on Earth are you talking about?
:confused:

[bodhitree]

What don't you understand disciple of mulletmaster. Perhaps you need more education. Maybe we need another story from you to understand your character or level of sophistication. maybe it will inspire us to be more like you.

[Mega_Fist]

What don't you understand disciple of mulletmaster. Perhaps you need more education. Maybe we need another story from you to understand your character or level of sophistication. maybe it will inspire us to be more like you.

It should be "What don't you understand disciple of mulletmaster?" as it is a question. You definately need more education. As for me I just read poetry and study the structure of Bach's chorales while being spiritual.

Why are you calling me "mulletmaster" anyway? I just don't know where your unhealthy fetish for fish has come from.

Does anyone here train in Taekwondo?

[Liz C]

As for me I just read poetry and study the structure of Bach's chorales while being spiritual.

Hmmm, two days ago Bach was "too mainstream" and you would "only listen to the works of Tallis and Byrd"...

[Repulsive Monkey]

Oih your Grandmaster, you say he studied under whatshiname Takeshi yeah?
Is he like Count Takeshi on Takeshi's castle, always wearing lumious spandex and going round shooting people with water guns and dressing up in gay suits?

[ThaiMantis]

Mega_fist ...i salute you. :cool: ...forum trolling of the highest order.


"Things are gonna change round here..." :D

[zuiquan1]

I agree with the above poster

mega just because you post up pictures of japanese swords DOES NOT make them "judo Katana's

you're a discrace to all martial artist, oh I'm sorry all americans, you're are another example of a ignorant american who caught thr Karate Kid on HBO one night and decided to come to respectable martial arts websight, throw a few martial arts tems about, and call your self a master.

oh and PLEASE DONT tell us another bull**** story of how your master got you laid, because from the looks of it you spend all your time on the computer being an ass

[Scott R. Brown]

Yes Mega_Fist,

You are truly a Master Baiter!!! That must be why you have such a Mega Fist!!!

[FuXnDajenariht]

lol yea yea...i laughed a couple times ill admit but dont push your luck. just know when to quit while your ahead cuz trolling gets real old real fast around here. broken records get tossed. :p

[Mega_Fist]

I'm not acquainted with all this gi,mpy jargon about "trolling". One thing I am acquanted with however is a judo katana. Let me tell you a true story that happened not that long ago.


I was training on a mountain in throwing techniques when a master walked passed and said "you are increadibly skilled and powerful but I'll show you some more techniques". I was confused- why would this master want to talk to me? I'm just a lowly 4th kyu! "You are probably the most skilled person I've ever met" was his reply.

I trained with him for 40 days learning the power behind his techniques. Finally he said "you are ready for the ultimate challenge". The master hit a gong and ten people came out of nowhere. I assumed a strong horsestance and judokicked ALL of them.


Hopefully after this true story people won't be so quick to mess with me.

[Scott R. Brown]

Why not just grasp your JUDO KATANA in your MEGA FIST and wave it at them in a threatening manner? Maybe someone will oblige you with a good whacking!!!!

[5Animals1Path]

And to think, we wonder why there's no money to help the homeless.

[bodhitree]

Megafist, in case you can't figure it out the word mullet has more than one meaning, and I'm not refering to the fish, so figure it out. Oh, and i'm not calling you mullet master you brilliant devil, I'm calling your fat master Andy mullet master, Yes indeed, i'm disrespecting him. Maybe you should butterfly twist me!


"I trained with him for 40 days learning the power behind his techniques. Finally he said "you are ready for the ultimate challenge". The master hit a gong and ten people came out of nowhere. I assumed a strong horsestance and judokicked ALL of them." megafist


perhaps you should judo kick me from a horsestance!!!!!!!


I love you megafist!

[bodhitree]

please don't ever change who you are megafist, and please don't ever stop posting here! You are the most entertaining person ever!

[Mega_Fist]

Why not just grasp your JUDO KATANA in your MEGA FIST and wave it at them in a threatening manner? Maybe someone will obligie you with a good whacking!!!!

Do you mean "oblige"?


I have studied LOADS about Judo and I know Megafist is telling the truth

Thank you, I'm glad someone knows what's going on.

[Mega_Fist]

Also, why does that guy keep on going on about fish?

[Scott R. Brown]

LOL!! Yeah I already fixed it!!


He probably thinks something fishy is going on here and he is using secret code just for the Halibut. He's got alot of Sole you have to admit!

[bodhitree]

everyone else knows what a mullet is right? Not the fish. Look at your flabby master andy, then you'll find out.

[Scott R. Brown]

Sure I know where you are coming from man!!!

Mullet: 'mÃlit

noun
1) highly valued lean flesh of marine or freshwater mullet

2) freshwater or coastal food fishes a spindle-shaped body; found worldwide

3) bottom dwelling marine warm water fishes with two barbels on the chin

[PangQuan]

Mullet: 'mÃlit

noun
1) highly valued lean flesh of marine or freshwater mullet

2) freshwater or coastal food fishes a spindle-shaped body; found worldwide

3) bottom dwelling marine warm water fishes with two barbels on the chin

ill add to this:

4) A really stupid hair style, originating with europian knights who favored the long style of hair, but would keep the top hair trimed as not to get in the way during combat.

Modernly used by dipsh!ts...

[Scott R. Brown]

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH!!!!!

You mean like this handsome dude? Is this Master Handy Andy????

Mullet? (http://www.mulletsgalore.com/motw/)

Click on the dot!!

[PangQuan]

DING DING DING


We have a winner!!!

[Mega_Fist]

Sure I know where you are coming from man!!!

Mullet: 'mÃlit

noun
1) highly valued lean flesh of marine or freshwater mullet

2) freshwater or coastal food fishes a spindle-shaped body; found worldwide

3) bottom dwelling marine warm water fishes with two barbels on the chin

That's what I thought. I found this very informative article on these fish. http://www.reel-time.com/feature/bondorew/mullet/RBmullet.html I once went fishing off the coast of Cromer. Unfortunately I didn't catch anything but the spirit of the sea delved into me and I became incredibly wise and spiritual.

[bodhitree]

That pic is flabmaster Andy and that is what i was refering to as a 'mullet'

[bodhitree]

been in any fights or judo-kicked anyone lately mega_dope?

[Scott R. Brown]

Are you sure it wasn't just a big wave that hit you! You have been all WET ever since!!! I think the wisdom gained was to fear the mullet, which is what happened to me when Poseidon blessed me with a kiss!! You have alot of guts to go out off the coast of Cromer, I hear there is alot of water there!

[Mega_Fist]

That pic is flabmaster Andy and that is what i was refering to as a 'mullet'

I see what you're saying but I don't see what makes him any more fish-like than you or me. A better example of a mullet man can be found on http://www.uterinefury.com/fishman.jpg

[Scott R. Brown]

LOL!!!

Well now that you mention it he does look alot more like Master Blaster Andy than the first pic. My he has put on a few extra pounds hasn't he? But he always was a looker too!! I bet he makes quite a CHUM!!!

[bodhitree]

The second pics face with the first one's hair, then you have master Andy.

By the way, awesome joke mega-

I'll give credit where credit is due!

[Mega_Fist]

Right, I seem to have got off on the wrong foot with some people. Let me tell you a true story about what happened last week and maybe you'll change your mind;

I was walking down the street when an old lady fell over in the road and a huge truck was going to run her over. I did a dive-roll and picked her up and missed the truck by a few seconds! The old woman said "thank you you are so brave and kind" and then introduced me to her grand-daughter who is well fit.

Hopefully this will help clear up a few things.

[PangQuan]

that makes alot of sense to me.

[Scott R. Brown]

Where was Master Andy during this heroic deed? Grooming his fins?

[bodhitree]

Mega



aaarrrrgggghhhh

just when I begin to think you made some progresss

[Mega_Fist]

Right, what is wrong with everyone judging me all the time. It seems that either people are angry at me for one reason or for the opposite. It's a catch 22 (which is also a really intellectual and clever book which I've read among other many other classics like "Pilgrim's Progress").

So, what do you have to say for yourself?

[bodhitree]

You tell ridiculas lies, how do you suppose we'd feel. You command respect for a master who deserves none. You endorse yourself as more sophisticated than anyone else. And many more points.

[bodhitree]

why don't you let us all circle around you then you can Judo kick us!

[Mega_Fist]

Right, a mon avi (which means "in my opinion" in French) I have recieved nothing but racist and sexist abuse. I'm giving you all three days to explain yourselves-if you don't there'll be trouble

[PangQuan]

I can explain everything.

You see. I am the grand wizard of funk. I bust out to the funky disco beats.

And sometimes when you let your mouth slip, we just kick it from the hip.

Cause everybody was kung fu fighting...we type as fast as lightning. I know it can be a little bit frightening, but dont worry, we have expert timing.

So you see the discontentment shared by many of the board members is due to the fact that, you, cannot bust down to the funky kung fu sound. Its the groovy kung fu beat that makes everything so neat.

All this judo katana business has no real beat to get funky with.

[anerlich]

It's a catch 22

Speaking of which, you said on the wing Chun forum that your mate Grandmaster Andy was way too alternative to have a website or post here, when I asked you why a Google search came up with nothing on a Judo Grandmaster with that name, or any high-ranking judoka called John Takeshi, who as we all know is Andy's teacher as well as being as non-existent as he.

Now you're telling us Andy's going to start posting here any day, and that for some reason you don't make clear that outcome should cause us all to tremble with fear. Has he learned to throw people via HTTP or something?

So Andy fell off his alternative wagon, huh? So much for that crap.

Which will come first? The real Judgement Day (JC's second coming), or Andy (or, more correctly, you with another screen name masquerading as him) posting on here?

[Mega_Fist]

I didn't think you'd understand. Andy is VERY alternative in that he only listens to music that is a fusion of at least three cultures so as not to be racist. You won't find him on the internet because there were LOADS of sites about him and how cool he is but he thought that the internet is not spiritual.

As for him coming online, the reason he will do that is to protect the honour of Sifu John Takeshi.

Looks like the joke's on you.

[SimonM]

fusion of at least three cultures

Three Cultures? Yeah, yeast, mold and bacteria.

[bodhitree]

listen mega
three days to explain our 'racist and sexist behavior'? I don't know what race or sex you are, but i hope you tell me, so that i may discriminate against that race and sex in the future. BUt then again, any race that could produce you must already live with too much shame, I'll leave them alone. What kind of trouble will there be mega_fool, I want some trouble. Oh, and please leave a link to one of these sites about 'how cool master andy is' (yes, flabby, trash master mullet)
And John takeshi, what a hoe (not the tool either, fool)

[blackmantis]

We've been waiting ages for Andrew, when is he coming?

[Sensei_Andy]

Bah, for all you pathetic unbelievers, I'm here. Spirituality is not just in the body, it is of the essence of the mind as well. I am here to disprove any false rumours that may have been spread about me and my exalted friend John Takeshi.

I remain,

Grandmaster Sensei Andy.

[SifuAbel]

:rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

Birthday:
January 7, 1980
What's your MA style?:
Judo
How long have you trained?:
My Life
Biography:
My reputation precedes myself. I have no need for a biography.
Location:
Irrelevant.
Interests:
Martial Arts, in particular the study of Judo Katana.
Occupation:
Martial Arts Instructor

[Mega_Fist]

Rejoice! The master is here! I demand that everyone who has posted on this thread posts another message saying; "We have waited for your wisdom and now you have come. The spirituality is among us now and for ever. Rejoice and be free for OSensei hath appoachethed".

I will be the first in line to present such an exaltment.

[Mega_Fist]

We have waited for your wisdom and now you have come. The spirituality is among us now and for ever. Rejoice and be free for OSensei hath appoachethed

[SimonM]

:rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

Birthday:
January 7, 1980


Dumb@ss made his new persona even younger than me? :D

[bodhitree]

I'm begining to think that the whole grandmaster sensei andy and megafist thing is a joke. You aren't real, who are you? a rogue moderator playing a cruel joke? nobody is that dumb.

[Sensei_Andy]

For approximately 65 Thousand years, the Australian Aborigines have been and had a culture, giving them the longest cultural background in the history of the world. This culture was and is the centre of the Aboriginal religion, spirit, soul and life, The Dreaming.The Dreaming can be and is defined as the past, the present and the future of the Aboriginal people of Australia as it relates to the story of Creation, the lives of the present Aboriginal generation and the prospective generations of Aboriginal people. The story of Creation of the whole earth, the shape of the land. Every creek, cliff and crevice have invisible vibrations that make apparent the history of every area, place. This relates to the inherent chi that every person retains within their "Zoul". This "Zoul" is in fact a personified representation of the true spirit of someone spiritual. To keep spiritual you must adhere to the seven ways of Judo jitsu:

1. There is no emotion; there is peace.
2. There is no ignorance; there is knowledge.
3. There is no passion; there is serenity.
4. There is no death; there is the Judo Katana Jitsu.

Learn from your experiences my brethren and join me in the quest for spiritual. :rolleyes:








"Ten tigers may overcome a large elephant, but the clever mouse can beat everyone in the spiritual tiger mind"

[bodhitree]

shut up

show us a pic of your mullet.

[Sensei_Andy]

You have now been officially excluded- I've clicked the ignore button.

[SifuAbel]

Hey mods,

Isn't there a rule against multiple screen names?

[TenTigers]

Ten Tigers will overcome the elephant? Great. Now I can challenge those pesky Choy Li Fut guys. They think they're sooo cool with their deadly elephant style!. HA!
...so, what about this mouse technique? What do I do if like, I'm beating up the elephant guy, and he whips out this mouse technique? Is there like a cat stance, or something I should go into?
Also, you are mentioning judo katana jitsu. Jitsu means war art. Is there also a spiritual path, say judo katana do? When one walks the spiritual path, could they also walk the path of the warrior? or are they in conflict? If you are in Europe, would you walk the path on the right or left side? Also, if you use whirlpool energy, as they speak of in Aikido, if you were below the equator, would the whirlpool flush the opposite way?

[@PLUGO]

Well, there seems to be more of a rul against spam and being a jerk than multiple screen names. There ARE various posters who tend to post from the same I.P. address... Snesi Andy & Mega fist being a perfect example.

So if one of them where to be banned for what they do should the other?

it's just one of those weird internet things I suppose. As Neither Mega Fist or Snesi Andy have done more than amuse themselves and sometimes others there's really no banable offence.











Yet.

[Mega_Fist]

Right, Andy was chillin round my house when he made the last post. I think you'll find he signed up to the forum under a different address if you check your records. Sifu Andy is cool.

Right this true story happened last week.

Andy and my mate Steve and me were chillin and smokin' in town by superkarts when Steve wanted some Walkers Salt and Vinegar. Suddenly like a bird flying, LOADS of fit babes came over and said "Are you THE grandmaster Andy of the Ninja Judo Squad Boyz?". And he was like "Yeah whatever, get over it- the tiger is the essence. Listen I've got a true story for you,

"'The tiger was speaking to the crane one day over a cup of tea when the rain feel upon his head. The tiger remarked ''''What is the rain that is upon me?'''' the crane then kicked him in the face and said ''''I kicked a tiger in the head haha :cool:

So Andy showed those babes who was boss and pulled one of them. That shows that he's the boss round here, AND he THE spirtual of the mind spiritualism.

[PangQuan]

I challenge Grandmaster Andy to a death match.

[Sensei_Andy]

One Piece was created by Eiichiro Oda, a former assistant to Rurouni Kenshin author Nobuhiro Watsuki. The series began its run in 1997 in Shueisha's Weekly Shonen Jump and is still being serialized. As of September 2005, there have been over 380 weekly installments, collected into 38 tankobon volumes.
One Piece is set in a fictional world, where pirates run rampant in an era known as the "Age of Piracy". The story of One Piece follows the adventures of a young pirate named Monkey D. Luffy whose body was turned to rubber after he ate a cursed fruit known as a Devil Fruit (Akuma no Mi). Luffy's particular fruit was the Gum-Gum Fruit, or Gomu Gomu no Mi in the Japanese release ("gomu" means "rubber"). While Devil Fruits grant their eaters fantastic powers (Luffy, for example, can stretch like rubber), it comes at the cost of never being able to swim, and in fact becoming complete deadweight upon being submerged in water. (This weakness may have a historical basis, as many real pirates were unable to swim.) The story features many pirates with super powers gained from the Devil Fruit, but the main focus of the story is that of Luffy and his crew striving to achieve their dreams while fighting those who would crush the hopes and dreams of others. While the Straw Hat Pirates are technically outlaws to the World Government and its Naval/Marine forces, they are much truer to their ideals than both other pirates and the corrupt establishment.
Because of its strong story, colorful characters, intense fights, and clever plot twists, One Piece has become the most popular current shonen manga published in Japan, and is now as recognizable a pop culture icon as Dragon Ball (if not moreso). In February of 2005, the comic set a record in Japan for the fastest manga publication to reach 100,000,000 copies sold.


I knew all of this from memory.

ps. has anyone seen an amazing video of Kendo versus Wutan Sword as I'd like to see it.

[PangQuan]

i have a video similar.

its a judo katana vs. shaolin pudao.

i wont post it because its too gory, and im afraid of getting banned. besides you wont like the ending.

[Liz C]

All this and he turns out to be only 25?

[Liz C]

So Andy showed those babes who was boss and pulled one of them. That shows that he's the boss round here, AND he THE spirtual of the mind spiritualism.

And he's an abusive misogynist, too! What a winner!

[SifuAbel]

I knew all of this from memory.

.

Savants do that sort of thing.

[PangQuan]

i think he means digital memory, as in, cut and paste...

[bodhitree]

this is all just too ridiculas

[Mega_Fist]

What does "ridiculas" mean? Is it something to do with all that fish you keep talking about? :confused:

[Scott R. Brown]

Come on guys!!

This guy is one of the most clever posters I have ever seen! I admire his creativity and originality! He clearly has the sense of humor of a Brit! He has not once gotten angry or abusive in response to some of the flaming he has recieved. That makes him far superior to most of those who took his game seriously in my book!

Who cares what his age is, he is smarter and more clever than most who post on these boards and many who have responded to him. He is well read and totally off the wall!! He is doing no harm and is clearly very entertaining! He should write for some televsion show in my book!

Some people need to get a sense of humor!!!

[bodhitree]

Its all been a joke, and i've been taking in by it. So, even megafist knows that judo katanas don't exist and andy does not deserve to be called master or anything else.

props to mega, funny guy.

[bodhitree]

can you post a link to judo master andy's website

(although he doesn't deserve to be called master)

fishman andy

[Mega_Fist]

Right, as i've said on more than one occasion Sensei Andy is too alternative and WAY too cool to have a website. If anyone is interested in making one for him then he will trade an online judokatana-jitsu lesson in return. In the mean time, no website

[Mega_Fist]

Everyone seems to be assuming that there is only one type of katana in the other thread, but we haven't addressed the issue of Judo Katana vs Normal Katana.

Which would win and why?

[bodhitree]

For a free judo katana lesson i'm down. But i don't know if i can make a site worthy of fishmaster andy?

[bodhitree]

I personally prefer boxing katana. dominates all other katanas. Joe Lewis was mean with it.

[brothernumber9]

The Judo katana would win cuz you can't get the bald chics with the regular katana.

[Mega_Fist]

First it was mullet-fish, now it's fishmaster! That Bodhitree likes his fish from the sounds of things.

It reminds me of that time when loads of lozers said I was sad because I draw pictures of cool people and so I beat them all up. Afterwards all the girlfriends of the lozers came to me and said "you're so brave" and then I got with them.

[anerlich]

It reminds me of that time when loads of lozers said I was sad because I draw pictures of cool people and so I beat them all up.

I agree with those guys. You are sad.


Afterwards all the girlfriends of the lozers came to me and said "you're so brave" and then I got with them.

So each of the unfortunate girls went from one lozer [sic] to another. There are as many foolish women in this world as men, I guess.

I can do websites, but I'm not interested in judo katana lessons. I've learned all there is to learn about imaginary weapons, and for that matter imaginary teachers.

Besides I insist on full creative control and you, Andy and Mr T (akeshi) probably wouldn't like what I'd put up there about you.

[anerlich]

Scott R Brown wrote:


This guy is one of the most clever posters I have ever seen!

Scott - you need to get out more.

[Scott R. Brown]

Hi anerlich,

Well maybe it is my sense of humor!

It has been clear to me from the beginning Mr. Mega_Fist is very tongue in cheek! ;) I think it is funny how some here have taken him so seriously when he is obviously pulling everyones leg!!

I appreciate his style because he is never abusive in his responses no matter how much he is insulted and he is completely off the wall in his responses. They frequently have nothing to do directly with what he is responding too!! I like the way he makes completely nonsensical anecdotes with meaningless punchlines! It is hilarious!!It takes alot of creativity to be consistent with that!

He has alot of class seeing as flaming is something of an art form on these threads at times and he takes it all like water off a ducks back and as good fun!!

Mega_Fist is my HERO!!!! :D

[Mega_Fist]

Right, several things.

1. I was wondering how I could get this thread to be "sticky". If anyone can make it sticky for me then I will tell them a wise saying.

2. About the fit babes- there were 5 of them- Emma, Emily, Anna, Alex (which is a girl's name as well as a man's name) and Elizabeth. Emma was like "Oi Megafist you are like really hard and I would NEVER mess with you." Emily then said "Also your drawings of cool people are really good" [So I drew a really fit picture of her after that btw]. Anna then said "What I like about Megafist is that he's both hard and sensitive". Alex then said to Elizabeth "Let's dump the lozers that Megafist just wasted and all of us go out with Megafist instead" which they all agreed to.

Hopefully this has sorted out a few misunderstandings- you think you're cool? How many girlfriends do you have? If less than 5 then I'd get moving if I were you.




"the spirit of the tiger can endure the mind of the spiritual of the tiger"

[Scott R. Brown]

Forget the wise saying!!

If i can get your thread to stick, will you share one of your babes with me??

[bodhitree]

I miss the days when i thought mega_fist was serious.

[Mega_Fist]

I AM serious Bodhitree and I'm WAY more serious than you.

[bodhitree]

So your saying every post you've written has NOT been a joke? Okay, well....
hhhhmmmmmmm, really, kind of sad then. yeah, Really sad.

[Scott R. Brown]

Yes!!

Those were the days when we were young and innocent! Birds would sing...flowers would grow!! Life had meaning!!:(

[Mega_Fist]

Bodhitree, I'm sad? I've got 5 girlfriends. If you think I'm sad you probably just don't understand me- I'm extremely clever and intellectual.

Robert Howard Grubbs (b. 27 February 1942) is an American chemist and Nobel laureate. He was born in Calvert City near Possum Trot, Kentucky and studied Chemistry at the University of Florida, Gainesville (B.S. and M.S.) and Columbia University, New York, where he obtained his Ph.D. under Ronald Breslow in 1968.
He next spent a year with James Collman at Stanford University. He was then appointed to the faculty of Michigan State University. In 1978 he moved to California Institute of Technology where he is presently Victor and Elizabeth Atkins Professor of Chemistry.
His main interests in organometallic chemistry and synthetic chemistry are catalysts, notably Grubbs' Catalyst for olefin metathesis and ring-opening metathesis polymerization with cyclic olefins such as norbornene. He also contributed to the development of so-called "living polymerization".
Professor Grubbs's many awards have included Alfred P. Sloan Fellow (1974-76), Camille and Henry Dreyfus Teacher-Scholar Award (1975-78), Alexander von Humboldt Fellowship (1975), ACS National Award in Organometallic Chemistry (1988), Arthur C. Cope Scholar (1990), ACS Award in polymer Chemistry (1995), Nagoya Medal of Organic Chemistry (1997), Fluka Reagent of the Year (1998), Mack Memorial Award (1999), Benjamin Franklin Medal in Chemistry (2000), ACS Herman F. Mark Polymer Chemistry Award (2000), ACS Herbert C. Brown Award for Creative Research in Synthetic Methods (2001) and the Nobel Prize in Chemistry (2005). He was elected to the National Academy of Sciences in 1989 and a fellowship in the American Academy of Arts and Sciences in 1994.
Grubbs received the 2005 Nobel Prize in Chemistry, along with Richard R. Schrock and Yves Chauvin, for his work in the field of olefin metathesis.

I knew ALL of that from memory thanks to my maths and science etc.

[bodhitree]

I'm so impressed, I bow down before you my intellectual superior.



you freaking gump.

[Mega_Fist]

Right I don't understand you because you first say something nice and then you say something nasty. My point is that if you think you're more spiritual, more cool, better at judo katana or better with the ladies than I am then you're probably wrong. I'm not saying you're bad it's just that I'm really talented.

[SimonM]

Just stop feeding him Bodhi Tree. This guy gets 2000+ hits partially because of the reaction he engenders. We stopped paying attention to Vasquez and he went away.

[Scott R. Brown]

Yeah, but Vasquez could get obnoxious!

Mega_Fist is clearly just having fun and he is hilarious!!

You will notice with the exception of his post for Sensei Andy he doesn't take it off of this thread. Therefore, he is not a troll, but just someone out to kill some time and have some fun!

[Mega_Fist]

More importantly I am trying to prove the essence of the spiritual. I think lots of people just don't understand my intellect so they assume that I'm being stupid or something. I got like 200 in an IQ test AND I've got 5 girlfriends so I'm sad? I don't think so.

[Scott R. Brown]

Well maybe it takes just us geniuses to understand each other!


My IQ is 250 and I caught your drift immediately! But don't worry if you keep working hard you might be able to catch up to me!! Try more push ups and squat thrusts. And keep the girlfriend limit to your present 5. Any more and you will start to lose too much of your vital Chi!! It leaks out you know!! ;)

You should see improvement in your brain capacity in about 3 months time! I'll be waiting and watching for signs of megalomania!!

[Mega_Fist]

I think a lot of people here are just jealous that I talk to babes online for 5 hours every day.

[bodhitree]

an hour for each one, great stuff.

(i'm sure they have to be incredibly fat)

[Mega_Fist]

Okay, due to the jealousy I am encountering from certain people I am forced to tell the following true story.

I was training with my nunchakus when a man came over and said "Oi, you are a mullet-fish. I don't like you and am going to discriminate against you on racist grounds and am now going to attack you." The man then attacked me but I used my nunchakus and did chin na and put him to the floor (mercifully).

"You are too hasty my brother" I said, "the tiger is the spiritual for the mind" I went on. The man looked at me, at first confused. Then he understood, "You are the essence of the spiritual" he said to me.

I hope this shows that you should be nice to me.

[bodhitree]

But your not a mullet fish, your stupid teacher is.

[Mega_Fist]

Perhaps you meant "you're"?

[brothernumber9]

regular katana beats Judo katana cuz Judo Katana doesn't have a hand guard

[Mega_Fist]

I'm glad someone is seriously adressing the debate! I think you might be thinking of a savate katana brothernumber9; the judo katana has a guard and also a handle.

I'm just about to start forging my own judo katana actually- I'm thinking of making a business so if anyone is interested then just ask.




Megafist, the man with the MEGA eliteness

[hitman142002]

...I KNOW YOU Sensei Andy.....but I remember your name as SHO 'NUFF!!
ALL HAIL MR 'NUFF!!

[Mortal1]

Hooking up with multiple fit babes on the internet for hours at a time. Beating others with judo katanas. This guy really has his act together. I just hope my name is big enough for him to accept me as his friend and or future member of his clan. I own a katana and if you give me some time I might be able to dig my ninja tabby boots out from the back of my closet. Also I have 2 chinese stars and the entire season of "The master" on video tape. If you have a Vcr that is.

[hitman142002]

Do you really have the master on Video???

[Mega_Fist]

I''m glad someone wishes to learn the methods of Takeshi Ryu Andy Style Judo. In order to become a disciple however you must pass a test. The test is a riddle-

If all the dragons of the spiritual are the mind of the tiger of the spiritual, who is the mental of the spirituality of the tiger of the mind?

[Scott R. Brown]

That is an easy one!!

The man in the mirror!!!!!

Next one plz:D

[brothernumber9]

okay then, if Judo Katana has a hand guard AND a handle, then how can you do a four fingered wrist lock? duh!?!?!?

[Mega_Fist]

It's such a shame the ignorance of some people on this forum- I was talking about the judo katana method NOT the taekwonjutsu wrist locking techniques- If you're into that you best talk to my mate steve (taekwonjutsu grandmaster).

My mate steve once was playing riffs on his guitar and I came up to him and said, "that's a bid sad; I only tend to play music on the sitar". After this Steve looked at me and said, "you truly are an ecowarrior, fighting to save the planet"

[Mortal1]

That was your best work yet.

No I don't have "The master" on tape. I wish I did though. Remember the one when Sho Kasugi destroyed that hick bar. At the end he jumps up and takes out the ceiling beam and it all collapses. I bet Grandmaster Andy could do that easily with judo Katana in hand and a diet coke in the other.

[brothernumber9]

does JudoGrandmasterAndy know mexican Judo? or even mexican Judo Katana?

[Mega_Fist]

I think most of you are just jealous that I'm soon going to Ashida Kim's Ninja camp in Florida.

[ThaiMantis]

Come on guys!!

This guy is one of the most clever posters I have ever seen! I admire his creativity and originality! He clearly has the sense of humor of a Brit! He has not once gotten angry or abusive in response to some of the flaming he has recieved. That makes him far superior to most of those who took his game seriously in my book!

Who cares what his age is, he is smarter and more clever than most who post on these boards and many who have responded to him. He is well read and totally off the wall!! He is doing no harm and is clearly very entertaining! He should write for some televsion show in my book!

Some people need to get a sense of humor!!!

agreed. megafist is one of the funniest trolls i've seen for a while. most amusing. and he has all of you right where he wants you.

once again i salute you sir.

[Mega_Fist]

Right, how long can you dudez meditate for? If less than 4 hours then don't even bother talking to me. I ONLY read poetry written in the 19th Century so I hope that demonstrates that I'm clever and specific.

[Mega_Fist]

Right, seeing as none of you are brave enough to reply I thought I would tell you what happened last night.

I was in a club playing snooker with the boyz when some guy came over and he was like "oi lozer, you reckon you're hard mate?", I said to him "I have the wisdom of a shepherd looking after his sheep in the meadows of spiritual". He then tried to punch me but I jumped in the air and it went into slow-motion like in the matrix and I kicked him.

After that I got the nickname in this club "BadBoiBruiser"

[thothor]

The guy who posted this is at best 20, has no clue, and does not really deserve a response. But i cannot help myself.

My friend, I can assure you, that if a challenge was answered, you're chances would be slim.

Try walking into a kung fu school/dojo and see how you go.

I bet you don't.

But who am I to criticize the enthusiasm of youth.

[Mega_Fist]

For your information about 6 months ago I went into a kung fu dojo and challenged the sensei. He was a master of Taichijutsu. I attacked him with a flying kick and won.

Looks like the joke's on you my friend. Be careful who you insult.

[bodhitree]

was it a judo flying kick

[Andrew Brookman]

This reminds me of that time they threw me out of church for doing a judo flying kick. Essentially the background behind the story is that I was the only one who wasn't a Christian there, as I obviously believe in the essence of the true mega tiger spiritual fighter. This is my story, told in the style of a fairy tale for some reason.

Once upon a time, I was cursing in Daniel's Chapel A.M.E. Zion Church. I called one of the deacons a *vulgar word*. Reverend Henry E. Miller preached about my vulgar language, he told the congregation in the sanctuary that I got a nasty filthy mouth. For the second time, I told the preacher to *vulgar word* off. I also told Reverend Henry E. Miller to suck a male camel's *vulgar word*. He got so tired of my *vulgar word*, he told one of the deacons to throw me out. He then escorted me to the door.
When I went to church that same Sunday, I picked up a 2 x 4, I went up to the pulpit and clocked the preacher in the head using my judo flying kick. He fell to the floor unconscious. Suddenly, the police was called on me. I then ran out of the church with a grin on my face being chased after by the cops.





"Five men with bizarre grins can never overcome the mega tiger face"

[Mega_Fist]

WOW, you are so brave. You must have TRUE spirituality. Where did you learn these bravery skillz? I know that John Takeshi used to teach seminars called "Judo bravery and tiger-spiritual techniqes". I'd love to learn bravery techniques, could you teach me?




Trivia- talking of which Ashida Kim's favourite band is "The Bravery" which he hopes to tour with.

[Wong Fei Hong]

I just came across this post i havent had so much fun since ralek/rolls was online, is he megafist ???!? Has he returned :p
And if megafist ISNT ROLLS/RALEK I WANT ROLLS/RALEK To come and uphold his title of master troll, because people have started to say megafist is a superior troll.

If megafist is ralek then i gotta put an entry in wikipedia lol he deserves some sort of recognition after all this time.

Megafister do you think your judo katana is superior to the technique of penor wakizashi ?? Most people only know tanto dong, but i was personally instructed in penor wakizashi by sifus mr marcus & lexington steele. Do you think your shmifu andy could compare to my 1337 technique ???

[Mega_Fist]

Sad sad sad... people accuse me of being a troll, a mullet-fish, they call me "fatty fatty bang bang", they claim my sensei has no skillz.

All I am is a brave man- someone brave enough to stand up to the anti-true spirituality of this forum. Someone brave enough to reveal the true skillz, the real philisophy, the true Judo.

Me a troll? No. All I am is a brave young man with a dream; a dream that one day the intolerances and racism against Takeshi Judo will stop for good.

[bodhitree]

megafist,
i was just enlightened! Judo master Andy came to me in a meditative state, When i came out of my trance i was attaced by ninjas, probably 12 or 13 of them. I picked one up, and spun him aroun knocking the rest down, then master Andy's voice came into my head, and i knew the deadly Judo head stomping dance!

Unbelievable, but true. I'm a good bloke now.

[Andrew Brookman]

megafist,
i was just enlightened! Judo master Andy came to me in a meditative state, When i came out of my trance i was attaced by ninjas, probably 12 or 13 of them. I picked one up, and spun him aroun knocking the rest down, then master Andy's voice came into my head, and i knew the deadly Judo head stomping dance!

Unbelievable, but true. I'm a good bloke now.

Now listen up "bodhitree" (if that is your real name, which I very much doubt), I know that I did not come to you in a meditative state - secondly by looking at your previous posts I can deduce that you do not have the true mega-tiger spiritual able to master the Judo head stomping dance (ずかずかと歩くダンスの先頭に立ちなさい). Thirdly, you can only be a "good bloke" by following the following advice: "Never look an elephant in the eye, for if it sees you clearly, the tiger shall pounce upon you and rip you to shreds. Beware the true tiger spiritual because although one must achieve it, until then you must avoid it at all costs. You may ride the monkey, but do not jump onto a dragon."

[bodhitree]

You don't remember giving me all that in my dream? I have a video clip here
http://www.headstompdancetogeyeshi.com/moraaito/2463/clip

now do you remember

[bodhitree]

Bodhitree is my real name,
my parents gave it to me because they knew i had true tiger spiritual energy inside.

[Andrew Brookman]

Bodhitree is my real name,
my parents gave it to me because they knew i had true tiger spiritual energy inside.

This reminds me of a time last week when I had to demonstrate my inner power:

I was walking down King's Parade admiring the cultured buildings, when I came across 12 loserz beating up some fit babes. I walked over to them and one of them said to me, "You need to hold it down Jack, put your phone back". I replied "Why on earth are you calling me Jack?". He replied "Taste a panda's ass". This insult was too much to take, so I used my Mega_Judo techniques and managed to beat up all 10 of them. Afterwards I had sex with every fit babe whilst discussing intellectual subject matter, such as the undiscovered works of Wilhelm Friedmann Bach.

This proves that I have true tiger spiritual energy. Also, bodhitree you need to grow up and get a real name - maybe you should turn over a new leaf.

[Andrew Brookman]

Are there any other English members on the forum, as I usually find that fellow Englishman are by far the most cultured and intelligent members of the human race. This is because of our stiff upper lip, tea-drinking and gentlemanly conduct.

So, a shout out to the English ladz!

[stubbs]

Good afternoon.

*sips tea*

[Mega_Fist]

I wish I was you Sensei- You are so brave! I mean most people (not me) but like most people (like bodhitree probz) would have run away from the lozers screaming. I would have like wasted them using a nunchaku or something.

Also I met a fit babe and she said I was cool.

[Mega_Fist]

Yeah enlgish is wicked. I heard that kung fu actually comes from England like aaaaages ago originally. If you don't believe me btw everyone then I recommend you read this

http://ejmas.com/jwma/articles/2003/jwmaart_docherty_0503.htm

It's like when those people refused to accept that Wing Chun came out of Judo.

[bodhitree]

I thought the english race came from Judo??? correct me if I'm incorrect.

[David Jamieson]

england, land of twats and ponces. Shag off you radishes, go get your own teabagging forum. :p

signed
mary queen of scots

[Wong Ying Home]

And all the from a man who calls himself the queen of scots ! Sounds like your allready versed in tea bagging

:D