Is Angry Weasel Do real ???

[Green Cloud]

Is Angry weasel Do Pai real?? This is a real style that's band from competition because the style is too angry. It comes from all the temples including the Shalom temple. What do you guys think??

[The Xia]

Yes it's very real. I am the style's last master and have used it to defeat real-life baddies such as Lex Luthor and Magneto. Angry Weasel Do Pai emphasizes scratching, biting, and loud screeching noises that drive the opponent’s soul out of the body.

[YiLiQuan1]

Is Angry weasel Do Pai real?? This is a real style that's band from competition because the style is too angry.

It's banned? From what competition? And how is a style "angry?"


It comes from all the temples including the Shalom temple.

So Sifu-Rabbi Lee Jun Horowitz teaches it?


What do you guys think??

I think you need to read what you write before you press "submit."

[The Xia]

It is angry because when you fight, you must not only do so in the manner of the weasel, but in the manner of an angry weasel. It is banned from every competition because the audience is emotionally scarred after witnessing the weasel's anger. The style compliments Happy Walrus Quan, of which I am also a master. The angry weasel is the yang to the happy walrus' yin.

As for Sifu-Rabbi Lee Jun Horowitz...he is no longer with us. As I said, I am the style's last master.







Warning! My comments are all jokes. Do not take this topic seriously and you may just have a good laugh.

[Radhnoti]

I once saw a weapon demo put on by Sifu-Rabbi Lee Jun Horowitz, he was truly a master of the spork.

[Green Cloud]

No youre wrong I am the king of weasel pai and I inherited the style from Sifu Rabbit lee. He was put down after biting me while passing his style to me.

The grandmaster learned the deadly movements of the rabbit and the rabbit weasel that got bit by the dog in front of the shalom temple.

[The Xia]

That is incorrect. Sifu-Rabbi Lee Jun Horowitz had the real stuff while his cousin, Sifu Rabbit Lee, was duped. You can tell the difference because students of Sifu Rabbit Lee can only scare those 13 and under with their screeching while those of us in the Horowitz camp can instill fear in the elderly. This proves that on the streets the strange noises will drive souls from their bodies. I learned angry weasel do from Sifu-Rabbi Lee Jun Horowitz and I learned Happy Walrus Quan from a clandestine group of Chinese Rastafarians.

[The Xia]

I once saw a weapon demo put on by Sifu-Rabbi Lee Jun Horowitz, he was truly a master of the spork.
I will relay your kind words to his ghost.

[Green Cloud]

Aha can Sifu Horowitz freeze some one with their looks?? Sifu Rabbit can send you away shiva ring.

[Green Cloud]

The Weasel pai Do style is very deceptive

For instance when some one asks you a question you can weasel your way right out of it then bite your oponent in the eye when he's scratching his head.

[The Xia]

There's only one way we can solve this dispute....according to article 3 of Shalom temple rules, written by Abbot Bruce Leebowitz, all weasel lineage disputes must be solved in screech outs. We must stand on top of a skyscraper, screeching at each other until one of our souls is blowing in the wind. The person who still has his soul is the true mojo jojo grandmaster soke of angry weasel do pai.

[Green Cloud]

I must confer with Citong grand pooba Si Jo Si gung:cool:

[The Willow Sword]

Angry Weasel Do is not Authentic Weasel. it is a hybrid amalgamation of watered down styles of Kun toy rat terrier tao and Pomeranian ryu style. and i HAVE FOUND the True identity of the hairy weasel master who is claimed as its soul inheritor. when you look at the picture you can see that it is NOT a weasel but a VOLE disguised as one.( i dont have the picture it was found ina book of animal circus acts from the 30's, but i saw it once and i REMEMBER.

you people misrepresent yourselves and i will do everything in my power on this forum to dscredit you.

True and Authentic Weasel is only taught at the shahababa moil temple in upstate New York. everyone else is a fake.

Peas and wub, TWS:p

[Green Cloud]

Please be specific is it the Shahahaba moil temle or was it the Sheehheeh Goim temple in the upper west side.

[BM2]

Yes it is real and can be seen on the movie "Kung Pow" where two wild weasels grab onto a piece of cloth so that they may be swung as a nunchuck or woodchuck or ...well you get it and if you don't you never will.
Will this endless thread never cease:confused:

[The Xia]

The style is banned in temples. True weasel fist fighters don't come from temples. Weasel fighters come from the Clan of the Yellow Dandelion. Our founder is originally from the temple but he proudly betrayed Shalom. All Shalom loyalists beware of me...Chief Yellow Dandelion!

[Green Cloud]

Yes but did you learn the needle in your but set I learned it a the shalom temple but found out later from my training brother that it was realy the Nown Low that we learned.

[Ray Pina]

The sad thing is how closely these posts resemble other posts on this forum made in all seriousness:)

[TenTigers]

"Please be specific is it the Shahahaba moil temle or was it the Sheehheeh Goim temple in the upper west side"
Well, here's the thing-for years people read the ancient Aramaic writings and mistakenly translated it as Shahahaba moil temple, when actually the correct tranlsation is Sheehheeh Goim temple. Because of this, Rabbi Bruce Leebowitz has refused to go to Bruce LeeRoy's bar mitzvah. Word has it, he is also planning on throwing pork fried rice on the temple grounds during Yom Kippur.

[charyuop]

I have never heard of the Weasel style or better the Angry one...
I am sure some of you might have heard of my Sifu, he comes from Eastern Europe, he's the great Igo Demorroidz. He told me that all the animal styles around are based on the principle of courage and courage comes only from the style he teaches, thus he claims all animal styles have foundation in his style: the brave Squirrel. Some people said that the Grandmaster Ga Kohs Pot with the brave squirrel style could stand in the middle of a street and managed to divert incoming cars without getting a scretch. Now this to me seems kinda hard to believe, but by what I have learnt so far I think it is the best style around.

[The Xia]

Yes but did you learn the needle in your but set I learned it a the shalom temple but found out later from my training brother that it was realy the Nown Low that we learned.
Yeah I know the needle in your butt set. Its applications are great. When someone is running his mouth and ready to fight you, you just calm him down and get him to take a seat....little does he expect to feel the sting of a strategically placed needle. While he is writhing in pain you must then attack him with cold energy. You see, cold energy is a metaphor for taking the nearest fire extinguisher and spraying him with it.

[Green Cloud]

Yeah I know the needle in your butt set. Its applications are great. When someone is running his mouth and ready to fight you, you just calm him down and get him to take a seat....little does he expect to feel the sting of a strategically placed needle. While he is writhing in pain you must then attack him with cold energy. You see, cold energy is a metaphor for taking the nearest fire extinguisher and spraying him with it.

You forgot In the Weasel Do system we stick our enemy with the needle in the but then we do the Down Low. That's when you stick the cotton in your enemies mouth to keep him from screeming.

That's why the Weasel Do system is to deadly for competition.

[cjurakpt]

as a duly appointed spokesperson of the Weasel Pai style (S. Innocenzzi founding GM), we publically disown, disavow and disregard Mr. Green Cloud for publically revealing the existence of the sub-set Angry Weasel style, as he was sworn to secrecy (really, he was, I was there) by the Heroic International Super Secret Shogun Society (HISSSS) before he was even allowed to SMELL the basics;

now that he has betrayed us, be forewarned, his life is worthless, and our judgement is that he die in shame: so we have dispatched our #1 super-terrific happy hour agent, The Furious Ferret, to do the dirty deed...it's only a matter of time...

[The Xia]

Angry Weasel is the King of all Weasel styles. The rest of Weasel Do isn't worth doing. Nothing can stand up to Angry Weasel's needle in your butt and down low sets. Angry Weasel is by far the angriest and therefore deadliest that Weasel Fu has to offer. Only Happy Walrus fist can stand up to Angry Weasel Do Pai. Therefore, it's best to do both.

[Green Cloud]

That's over the top, youre right about Inno being the GM of Weisel pai but I am talking about the Weisel Pai Do system.

The WPD system is diferent than the WP system. My style is similar but more complete so bring it!!! Rearrrrchiaarrrgg

[cjurakpt]

That's over the top, youre right about Inno being the GM of Weisel pai but I am talking about the Weisel Pai Do system.

The WPD system is diferent than the WP system. My style is similar but more complete so bring it!!! Rearrrrchiaarrrgg

marsupial, puh-leeze! we all know that WP is the original style, founded 18,003 years ago at the dawn of civilization, and that WPD is just some watered down crap with a bunch of hamster-treadmill stuff thrown in to make it look good - I mean, can you really take a weasel style seriously where the practitioners all wear matching, color coded bathrobes?

[The Xia]

marsupial, puh-leeze! we all know that WP is the original style, founded 18,003 years ago at the dawn of civilization, and that WPD is just some watered down crap with a bunch of hamster-treadmill stuff thrown in to make it look good - I mean, can you really take a weasel style seriously where the practitioners all wear matching, color coded bathrobes?
WPD is better then WP. It's a big improvement. As I said, it was founded by a disgruntled Shalom monk in the Lo Mein Dynasty who then formed the Yellow Dandelion Clan. And our color coded bathrobes were adopted by Sifu-Rabbi Wong Fei Hershowitz during the Wonton Dynasty because of the famous ban on deadly styles.

[Green Cloud]

The Robe is an essential weapom since the atacks accur in the Jekuzi.

[The Xia]

Yes that is true. It is required that you attack an unsuspecting senior citizen that is relaxing in a Jacuzzi to get the 10th degree teriyaki sensei batbelt.

[The Xia]

My Happy Walrus Fist comes from Sifu William Hung. The style has only one form. I'm breaking millennia of secrecy by showing it to you but what the heck. Behold the glory of the unedited She Bang Kata!!!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EyM_uo9mOQs

The deadly She Bang Kata is one of the few forms in existence that can match the deadliness of the needle in your butt set.

[Green Cloud]

I must admit the She Bangs form looks deadly:eek:

[sir-elrik]

Is Angry weasel Do Pai real?? This is a real style that's band from competition because the style is too angry. It comes from all the temples including the Shalom temple. What do you guys think??


is the spelling wrong cause i cnt find **** in google?

r u sure its calld weasel?
cause when i askd my sifu he hsnt heard it before (he dsnt speak english though)



p.s i something wrong with the water in states?

[Green Cloud]

Yasou filo ti kanis;) I don't know if I'm spelling it correctly phoneticaly it sounds like weasel or in Mandarin Wearrshel.

[TenTigers]

truth be told, Greatmaster BS Frantzis Ford A Capella (Greatmaster is much, much more higherer than Grandmaster, btw) has been overheard saying that the original name, Weasel Kung-Fu is actually "we sell Kung-Fu". For revealing the secrets of the Do-P'ai, he has since taken vows and shaved his head and become a Monk. He will never be seen again, except on commercials for Mentos, and valtrex-which have since merged to form a delicious chewable treatment for herpes. They also come in suppositories-not nearly as tasty, for those who have had needle in the butt mishaps. This is his contribution to the world. This is his gift.

we should cherish this moment.

[The Xia]

The highest title is greatmasterer. As in I'm more masterer then you. But greatmasterer is higher. It's all like, I'm more greatmasterer then you. This is the bestest title in Weasel Do Pai Kung Phooey. The only person to ever be called greatmasterer is the founder of Shalom Temple, Bobo, also called the Buddypanda.

[Green Cloud]

But it weasel pai Do we have the Kow Dung form or is it the tai bo from the Cali temple.

[Dingo983]

Not to hi-jack this thread, but obviously you all have not heard of the honorable kung fu art of Flat-footed Dim Mak Drunken Duck Claw style that incorperates the yin-yang pricipals of Sweet and Sour! Here is an example of the deadliesnesses of the style that makes my Grandmaster more Grandmasterer than your Grandmasterererer.

http://www.dailymotion.com/cluster/fun/video/xezsu_pure-violence

[Su Lin]

I must admit the She Bangs form looks deadly:eek:

Is that what inspired Ricky Martins song of the same name???:p

[charyuop]

My Happy Walrus Fist comes from Sifu William Hung. The style has only one form. I'm breaking millennia of secrecy by showing it to you but what the heck. Behold the glory of the unedited She Bang Kata!!!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EyM_uo9mOQs

The deadly She Bang Kata is one of the few forms in existence that can match the deadliness of the needle in your butt set.

Sorry, but the She Bangs Kata belongs to the Squirrel Do...if you don't believe me check carefully....Sifu Hung practiced Squirrel style for so long that he got the famous squirrel teeth (which allow the deadly move called Bite of the Squirrel).
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i6FEWmtsNEs
Here you can see 2 of Sifu Hung's students while sparring....watch out coz it is kinda rough!

[TenTigers]

Well, squirrel Kung-Fu is not nearly as scary as Cat Man Do. Here is a clip of Meow Hing, the Geatest Grandmistressess of the style, performing a Cata. The "c" was later changed to a "k" to hide the origins of this deadly style.
.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DJeX8_CocRw&mode=related&search=

[Green Cloud]

OH MI GOD!! I lost a couple of years of my life watching that vid. EEEK:eek: I'm a cat lover my self but I loved the part when flings the cat, the rest was just yuk.

[charyuop]

I will go look tomorrow for a school of Cat Man Do. I bet no other style could beat it....it is enough such a powerful cata to scare away the opponent.

[Lorenzo Valla]

Really....nicely done. Nice to have something to smile about. The silence from the Jonestown crowd on the other thread is deafening.

The cat thing was disturbing but I passed it on.

[The Xia]

This is the form that must be mastered before learning the needle in your butt set.

WARNING! THIS SET IS VERY DEADLY AND SHOULD NOT BE DONE IN THE PRESENCE OF CHILDREN, OLD FOLKS, HOBOS, OR FLIES.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_9IUZHIBKzA

[Flaca]

:D
And I thought you guys were humorless. L M A O!!!!!

[Green Cloud]

This is the form that must be mastered before learning the needle in your butt set.

WARNING! THIS SET IS VERY DEADLY AND SHOULD NOT BE DONE IN THE PRESENCE OF CHILDREN, OLD FOLKS, HOBOS, OR FLIES.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_9IUZHIBKzA

That form is the weapons version of the She Bangs set. It's also used to deflect the powerful caws of the weasel do pai

[Becca]

Well, squirrel Kung-Fu is not nearly as scary as Cat Man Do. Here is a clip of Meow Hing, the Geatest Grandmistressess of the style, performing a Cata. The "c" was later changed to a "k" to hide the origins of this deadly style.


Some of Meow Hing's more sucksesful pulpils...

[The Xia]

The Slap Phooey Pigeon Kata.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KUmbaJfPLcA&

[jigahus]

Angry weasel do is so real it's unreal.

[charyuop]

The Slap Phooey Pigeon Kata.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KUmbaJfPLcA&


I would stop making fun of this guy, if he gets mad you are in deep trouble. I looked some videos on youtube of him practicing with nunchako, stick and free hands and it was really scary. If you read his profile that's what comes out...

"one-man-show, sugar-daddy, movie-producer,kung-fu/.Tai- Chi/.self-defense Instructor,Si-Fu, Computer-Doctor"
Occupation: self-employed hacker

[The Xia]

His videos have been dropped here before. http://ezine.kungfumagazine.com/forum/showthread.php?t=42246

He sells DVDs.
Read his comments as well....
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ROn22kcrwrA

[The Willow Sword]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RDrejMIH4M8

I worship master Kong.

TWS:D :D

[The Xia]

I wonder if he has made so much as a cent.

[Flaca]

I wonder if he has made so much as a cent.

Well, he won't be getting any dates from it. :o

[The Xia]

lol did you read his comments like I said?
Quote from him,
"my new Kung-Fu style is: "Charlie-Fat",
its also known as Chinese Ninja...!
its banned, forbidden from Shaolin Temple, long ago."

[The Xia]

Weasel Do Pai has all the Chinese ****roaches in it. When you master all the ****roaches you take on the bug's traits and can even transform into a giant ****roach. Here is a video of a Weasel Pai Doka who has mastered all of the ****roach styles.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PmTUZ8Rlwno

[TenTigers]

The sound on my pc is not working-and this is when I realized I was actually watching a master perform the famous lost set of Joi Bot Siu Seen-Eight Drunken Little Immortals. Notice the elusive bobbing and weaving of the head, in order to create a moving target. This is most definately a short bridging system, and not a long arm style. Heck, it's not a long leg style either.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=upiZQqKHyZ8&mode=related&search=

[The Xia]

Weasel Do Pai has all the Chinese ****roaches in it. When you master all the ****roaches you take on the bug's traits and can even transform into a giant ****roach. Here is a video of a Weasel Pai Doka who has mastered all of the ****roach styles.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PmTUZ8Rlwno
These styles are so deadly that the language filter blocks out part of the name. Here is a picture of the Weasel Pai Do ****roach Fu specialist in his ultimate form.
http://www.kinoweb.de/film97/MenInBlack/pix/alien_edgar.jpg

[The Xia]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dDy8Bx8BTjA

[The Xia]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ud0bf6lSAEc

And before anyone asks, yes you have to dress like that and play that song to get the full effects of the training.

[Dingo983]

Ha! ignore the flat-footed dim mak drunken duck style. Me and my followers have used our psychic exercises and have merged with master Kong in a parallel universe to come up with the martial art of the future. Here is the secret Rubber Duckie Kata in all its glory. Bask in its superiorness (is that a word?).

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y06xLNHsznA

[Green Cloud]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ud0bf6lSAEc

And before anyone asks, yes you have to dress like that and play that song to get the full effects of the training.

This guy reminds of Bob the animal Klein, has anyone ever seen his stuf??

[The Xia]

lol You mean this guy?

http://www.movementsofmagic.com/

But this one REALLY takes the cake though.

http://www.streetcombat.8m.com/

[The Xia]

A quote from Hans Eric Bristol

"Through meditation I remembered what happened hours after I was born. Excessive liquid became trapped in my throat. Doctors tried to resuscitate me. My heart stopped for 30 seconds. I was clinically dead, but then the doctors were able to revive me. Yes, I was dead, but then I was reborn. Upon my rebirth, I became a greater human being, capable of things that I wasn't before. I was like a phoenix who died and rose up from its own ashes to become even more powerful. From that day on, I referred to myself as ‘The Phoenix.'

A quote from Hans Eric Bristol's site

Born with an IQ of 198, Hans Eric Bristol believes that high intelligence is only one factor in developing “Awakening.” Having studied religions like Greek Mythology, Buddhism, and Hinduism, he has created his own sect of religious fulfillment. Bristol refers to it as “Greekbuduism” (Greek=Greek Mythology, bud=Buddhism, uism=Hinduism).

In his first chapter, Hans Eric Bristol writes the lost book of the Bible, Pre-Genesis. The Book of Genesis was the first book of the Bible which talked about the creation of the world along with Adam and Eve. Pre-Genesis goes before that and discusses the creation of God himself.


During the Big Bang, the gaseous mass of energy exploded and all the planets and stars took shape. The universe was born. There were three types of energy that existed. There were the neutrons, the neutral energy. Then there were, the electrons, the negative energy. And there were the protons, the positive energy. The electrons, the negative energy, accumulated and became a negative force. It developed awareness and understanding. It was called Satan. The protons, the positive energy, accumulated and became a positive force. It developed awareness and understanding. It was called God. (Pre-Genesis 1:21-1:25)


I think that this guy blows Bob "The Animal" Klein out of the water.

[cjurakpt]

This guy reminds of Bob the animal Klein, has anyone ever seen his stuf??

brrrrr....

isn't he out in your neck of the woods?

[The Xia]

You are correct cjurakpt. He has his school in Long Island, NY.

http://www.movementsofmagic.com/School/Schedule.htm

[The Xia]

Another quote from Hans Eric Bristol

"I was bathing in the lake when the bear found me again. This time I was ready. I ran to the shore of the lake where I made the fire and grabbed the new wooden spear that I made the night before. The bear came running. I stood my ground. I closed my eyes. I knew how close it was to me by its smell. The smell from the bears fur was so gritty and pungent; an indescribable smell of worms spawning from decayed mud; the smell of flies eating away at a carcass of a cow; the smell of a dead, wet log harboring billions of untamed, microscopic animals; the smell of primal, savage nature itself running into me like a heaving juggernaut. In those brief few seconds, I remembered what Sensei Hiroshi said- "breath, keep calm, open up and release." At that moment, when the bear was inches from me with its claws ready to slash down on me, I opened my eyes and plunged the spear into its heart. It cried in a strange growl like blood was trapping its windpipes, and it was trying to clear it only to have his own regurgitation come back to trap it again. I pulled the spear out his chest. I felt its hot life-giving red liquid poor all over my hands. Then I delivered a swift roundhouse kick to the bear's head. It fell to the ground. The body that once was heaving with unrelenting energy was now a dead piece of flesh. I looked at the bears genitals, and I noticed that it was still fully erected. There is a possibly that the bear did not wish to attack me, but thought as me as a mate. It did not matter. Life is full of irony. There doesn't have to be an answer. With my knife I cut off the bear's *****. For the next few days, I dried the bear's ***** in the sun. I attached it to a piece of rope that I made from vine leaves. I hung the rope around my neck. I stood beside the lake and looked at my reflection in the water. I was naked with a dried bear's ***** handing around my neck. I remembered this day marking my right of passage into manhood.

[Green Cloud]

You are correct cjurakpt. He has his school in Long Island, NY.

http://www.movementsofmagic.com/School/Schedule.htm

I believe that Ten Tigers has some video of this guy. Maybe someone can post some clips. I garantee that when you guys see this dude in action you will be convinced that he is the true master of the weisel pai do.

[The Willow Sword]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vh7Svd7Mblk


Todd is a god:cool:

TWS


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6OHCAXvsAqg The Messiah

[cjurakpt]

but THIS takes the cake!!!


Chapter 3 The Kangaroo’s Pouch
Palming of weaponry is one of many highly praised tactics found in the M.N.S.S. system. Learn to palm everyday items like scissors, kitchen knives, and baseball bats, and learn how to unleash them to brutally maim your opponent without him being aware of it until he is bludgeoned semi-conscious on the ground. This chapter will also show clips from a high-speed video in which Master Bristol conceals a Swiss Army Knife inside his buttocks. Wearing loose fitting slacks, Master Bristol plunges his hand down the back of his pants and takes out the knife with blade drawn, timed at 0.975 seconds.

:eek: :eek: :eek:

[5Animals1Path]

but THIS takes the cake!!!


Chapter 3 The Kangaroo’s Pouch
Palming of weaponry is one of many highly praised tactics found in the M.N.S.S. system. Learn to palm everyday items like scissors, kitchen knives, and baseball bats, and learn how to unleash them to brutally maim your opponent without him being aware of it until he is bludgeoned semi-conscious on the ground. This chapter will also show clips from a high-speed video in which Master Bristol conceals a Swiss Army Knife inside his buttocks. Wearing loose fitting slacks, Master Bristol plunges his hand down the back of his pants and takes out the knife with blade drawn, timed at 0.975 seconds.

:eek: :eek: :eek:

He must've had lots of practice at the funny farm.

[cjurakpt]

or better still...


M.N.S.S. Weapons

M.N.S.S. students are taught 7 weapons. These weapons look like plain objects. In a real battle, M.N.S.S. fighters aren't taught to use these weapons as they are. Rather, they are expected to take objects from their surrounds to substitute these weapons. The weapons themselves are meant to mimic everyday objects. WE DO NOT TEACH CLASSICAL WEAPONRY. Weapons taught in other martial art systems like the staff, bo, nunchaku, and sword are completely useless for real life combat, since no one will carry these weapons when they are walking on the streets. M.N.S.S. weaponry are of one a kind, and no other style offer such practical weapons training.


6-inch magic wand (a 6-inch wooden stick with sharp edge)

Substitutes: knife, pencil, pen, rolled-up newspaper, fork, or any short, sharp object

Uses: cutting, grinding, poking into eyes, throat, soft body cavities, and pressure points.



4-foot magic wand (a 4-foot wooden stick)

Substitutes: baseball bat, lead pipe, black jack, any cylinder type object

Uses: swinging into head and body, bludgeoning



Magic Rope (4-foot rope)

Substitutes: rope, string, shoe lace, twisted towel, sweater, shirt, ect.

Uses: choking, whipping, entangling limbs



Magic Blocks (12 inch X 12 inch wooden blocks)

Substitutes: brick, rocks, T.V. remote control, or just about any object of similar size

Uses: throwing, striking, or grinding



Magic Dust (white powder)

Substitutes: sand, dirt, salt, sugar, flour

Uses: throwing into eyes to blind, throwing into mouth and nose to suffocate



Magic Slime (green slime, liquify rubber)

Substitutes: food objects (ex. mash potatoes, handful of pees), dog poop, mud,snow

Uses: smearing and grinding into face to blind, suffocate, and distract.



Magic ***** (rubber strap-on *****)

Substitutes: fully erect pen1s

Uses: utilize your own erect pen1s (which can be made instantly erect through breathing method) to poke body cavities, pressure points, and eyes.



gawd-daaang!!!!

[The Xia]

I believe that Ten Tigers has some video of this guy. Maybe someone can post some clips. I garantee that when you guys see this dude in action you will be convinced that he is the true master of the weisel pai do.
I don't know. It's tough for Bob to compete with a man who claims this.

A quote from Bristol's site

Excerpts for MNSS Newsletter #18935
Hans Eric Bristol Defeats Rickson Gracie

Ever since Hans Eric Bristol started sending Rickson Gracie numerous challenges, Rickson has not responded. Hans even used a male stripper messenger service to deliver the challenge to Rickson himself at his school in Pacific Palisades, California on January 23, 2004 to invoke a response from him. Still, nothing. On December 12, 2004, Hans Eric Bristol was finally able to challenge Rickson. At 2:00 A.M. in the morning, Hans through meditation made his celestial body separate from his physical body. His celestial body arrived at Rickson's home where Hans drew Rickson's celestial body out into the open. Rickson's celestial self accepted the challenge. Hans visualized a cage out in the Neo-Tranzoride realm where the fight was to take place.

During the fight, Rickson attempted numerous takedowns. Hans was able to evade the takedowns by shifting his body to the side and visually redirecting Rickson's eyesight with a feinting motion. The frustrated Rickson attempted to punch. Hans was able to block and dodge many of the punches, but Rickson did land one sharp jab at Hans' face. Then suddenly, Hans darted, and he disappeared from Rickson's frontal view. Then Rickson was surprised to know that Hans was in back of him. He turned around where he was met with a left hook to the chin. Rickson was knocked out in 21.3 seconds. Hans Eric Bristol has won the challenge.

Keep in mind, the Neo-Tranzoride realm is a place in the celestial plane where the physical laws of nature are EXACTLY the same as in reality as proven by neo-physicists, so this is valid victory. After the fight, Rickson woke up in his bedroom with a bruised chin with total memory of what has happened. Hans also was able to pinch Rickson's sacral nerve after he was knocked out which made him impotent. Hans imputed into Rickson's memory that he is the only one who can align his nerve function meridian, and that he will only do this if Rickson's would release a public letter telling of his defeat to Hans Eric Bristol Hans Eric Bristol thanks Rickson Gracie for accepting this challenge. Rickson Gracie is wholeheartedly respected.

[Green Cloud]

Holy Cow:eek:

[The Xia]

A quote from Bristol

"Hillary and I would take long walks out in the White House rose garden. Chelsea would sometimes follow. I remembered the day August 18, 1996 at 9 in the morning when I first kissed Hillary. In the garden, there would be this large maple tree. Hillary and I walked under it. Hillary turned around and hugged me and said, "Do you know that you are a wonderful man." She leaned forward and kissed me. Out of the corner of my eye I saw Chelsea looking on in the distance. She smiled. For the next two weeks we went on outings and we would have long, passionate episodes of kissing and fondling whenever the secret service agents cannot see us. Though being an older women, she had the vivaciousness of a twenty -year-old coupled with the charm and discipline of a mature women.".... "We ended the affair after two weeks when I left to go back home. Though we never slept together, I can tell in Hillary's eyes that if this world were free of judgement and gossip, we would be together forever. She was my heart. I had what her husband lacked. Chelsea knew of our affair and approved of us. I cannot speak for her, but I felt that I had everything that her father didn't have."

[golden arhat]

i am the only keeper of angry weasel do none but me has learned the secrets of the ball gag
or the butfreak set that i learnt from the only master of angry weasel in the shalom temple run prison
master bubba

[Green Cloud]

youre one sick puppy:)

[golden arhat]

"youre one sick puppy"
try racoon pit bull hybrid with rabies

[The Xia]

youre one sick puppy:)
Me, arhat, you, or Hans Eric Bristol?

[Dim Wit Mak]

Yes it's very real. I am the style's last master and have used it to defeat real-life baddies such as Lex Luthor and Magneto. Angry Weasel Do Pai emphasizes scratching, biting, and loud screeching noises that drive the opponent’s soul out of the body.


Master: May I be a weasel disciple so I may unleash the weasel on my enemies? I have been told by some that I am a weasel.:D

[golden arhat]

Master: May I be a weasel disciple so I may unleash the weasel on my enemies? I have been told by some that I am a weasel.:D

are u a lawyer by chance ?

[The Xia]

You may become my weasel disciple under several conditions. First, you must sign a contract that says you will do the following: Live by the weasel code, obey Greatmasterer's commands, keep the training area clean, never be late on payments, never reveal any of our deadly training or techniques to anyone...even when defending yourself, never spar or compete (we are too deadly for that), and hand over powers of attorney to Greatmasterer. Always remember to call me Greatmasterer, if not, the contract requires that you pay me at least 100 bucks cash as penalty. To solidify our arrangement you must undergo the traditional bite seed ceremony. You will enter the Weasel Pai Do Mojo Jojo Dojo and proceed to weasel your way to me, who will be seated. Here you will pour some sesame seeds into a cup and present it to me. I will eat the seeds and take off my shirt. I will give you the priceless sweat drenched article of clothing in exchange for a measly 20 grand. After this, you are an official member of the Yellow Dandelion Clan.

[Dim Wit Mak]

are u a lawyer by chance ?

No. I think that lawyers must combine Weasel/Shark together for their kung fu style.:)

[Dim Wit Mak]

You may become my weasel disciple under several conditions. First, you must sign a contract that says you will do the following: Live by the weasel code, obey Greatmasterer's commands, keep the training area clean, never be late on payments, never reveal any of our deadly training or techniques to anyone...even when defending yourself, never spar or compete (we are too deadly for that), and hand over powers of attorney to Greatmasterer. Always remember to call me Greatmasterer, if not, the contract requires that you pay me at least 100 bucks cash as penalty. To solidify our arrangement you must undergo the traditional bite seed ceremony. You will enter the Weasel Pai Do Mojo Jojo Dojo and proceed to weasel your way to me, who will be seated. Here you will pour some sesame seeds into a cup and present it to me. I will eat the seeds and take off my shirt. I will give you the priceless sweat drenched article of clothing in exchange for a measly 20 grand. After this, you are an official member of the Yellow Dandelion Clan.

Uhhh?? I can do some of that stuff, but my career as a panhandler doesn't allow me to pay much more than a dozen apples a month for the contract. Please write that in the contract. Never having gone to law school, I don't think I can understand power of attorney enough to agree to that stipulation.:)

[The Xia]

I'm afraid I am not allowed to make such decisions. Although I am a Greatmasterer and Chief of the Yellow Dandelion Clan, I report to the Heroic International Super Secret Shogun Society. I will have to bring your case to the council of 25th Degree Teriyaki Belt Sensei Greatmasterer Jedi Sijo Sigungs. Ultimate say in the matter will be decided by the 26th Degree Teriyaki Belt Sensei Wise Old Man Greatmasterer Jedi Sijo Sigung Abbot Grand Shogun Pooba Dark Lord Of The Sith Ninja Darth. Unfortunately, I cannot reveal to you the identity of the 26th Degree Teriyaki Belt Sensei Wise Old Man Greatmasterer Jedi Sijo Sigung Abbot Grand Shogun Pooba Dark Lord Of The Sith Ninja Darth. He is far too deadly to allow me to reveal his identity. Uh oh, I've already said too much by indicating that 26th Degree Teriyaki Belt Sensei Wise Old Man Greatmasterer Jedi Sijo Sigung Abbot Grand Shogun Pooba Dark Lord Of The Sith Ninja Darth is a he.

[The Xia]

The 26th Degree Teriyaki Belt Sensei Wise Old Man Greatmasterer Jedi Sijo Sigung Abbot Grand Shogun Pooba Dark Lord Of The Sith Ninja Darth has decided to reveal something about himself to the world. He is too deadly to actually show himself but the man this video centers around comes close to what 26th Degree Teriyaki Belt Sensei Wise Old Man Greatmasterer Jedi Sijo Sigung Abbot Grand Shogun Pooba Dark Lord Of The Sith Ninja Darth is like.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7z9gcC_OD0

[Dim Wit Mak]

The 26th Degree Teriyaki Belt Sensei Wise Old Man Greatmasterer Jedi Sijo Sigung Abbot Grand Shogun Pooba Dark Lord Of The Sith Ninja Darth has decided to reveal something about himself to the world. He is too deadly to actually show himself but the man this video centers around comes close to what 26th Degree Teriyaki Belt Sensei Wise Old Man Greatmasterer Jedi Sijo Sigung Abbot Grand Shogun Pooba Dark Lord Of The Sith Ninja Darth is like.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7z9gcC_OD0

Why did this post make my hungry?:D

[The Xia]

Weasel Pai Do has strange effects in those that witness it. Most are permanently scarred and others become hungry. This video shows what happens when you mess with a Weasel Pai Do Kung Phooey Man.
BEWARE! THIS VIDEO IS EXTREMELY DEADLY AND EVEN LOOKING AT THE LINK ON THIS POST MAY CAUSE DISTRESS IN SOME






























Is your mind prepared?






















































You sure?








































Ok, fine.

























































This is your last warning. Turn back if you cannot take the deadliness
















































































Behold! Weasel Pai Do used in real life combat!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rBTkdaHkFhw

[The Xia]

This is a video of three Weasel Pai Do 1rst degree hot sauce White Tiger Belt Sempai engaging in traditional Weasel Pai Do sparring.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T_tiBGOEoVM
And yes, all Weasel Pai Do sparring must take place in strange basements, warehouses, or labs, and be accompanied by cheesy music. To win in traditional Weasel Pai Do sparring, you have to make the opponent wind up with a hook in his or her (There are plenty of Weasel ladies, although there is a separate ranking system for them) eye.

[Mook Jong]

That is some impressive and brutal combat, where can i learn the secrets of angry weasel pai do?

[The Xia]

First, you must sign a contract that says you will do the following: Live by the weasel code, obey Greatmasterer's commands, keep the training area clean, never be late on payments, never reveal any of our deadly training or techniques to anyone...even when defending yourself, never spar or compete (we are too deadly for that), and hand over powers of attorney to Greatmasterer. Always remember to call me Greatmasterer, if not, the contract requires that you pay me at least 100 bucks cash as penalty. To solidify our arrangement you must undergo the traditional bite seed ceremony. You will enter the Weasel Pai Do Mojo Jojo Dojo and proceed to weasel your way to me, who will be seated. Here you will pour some sesame seeds into a cup and present it to me. I will eat the seeds and take off my shirt. I will give you the priceless sweat drenched article of clothing in exchange for a measly 20 grand.
Since you do not wish to study under me necessarily, you can do the same stuff with any Greatmasterer in the Heroic International Super Secret Shogun Society. Green Cloud is qualified to teach Weasel Pai Do if you are interested (However, The 26th Degree Teriyaki Belt Sensei Wise Old Man Greatmasterer Jedi Sijo Sigung Abbot Grand Shogun Pooba Dark Lord Of The Sith Ninja Darth reports that there may be a situation, which was discussed earlier in the thread, that may prevent him from passing on Weasel Pai Do).

[The Xia]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vh7Svd7Mblk


Todd is a god:cool:

TWS


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6OHCAXvsAqg The Messiah
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C9PZeel2OD4

[Green Cloud]

after watching master Todd's vids one thing I know for sure he is 42 years old and a bad ass.