Is Shao-lin Ninjitsu for real?

[John Takeshi]

If you're new to the world of Kung Fu and have a questions like: "Is the systen known as Shaolin Ninjitsu real shaolin kung fu???"

I have answers.

Yes, it is for real. It may be the only thing that is real. If you have a Master's Degree from an accredited university, I can enlighten you and relieve you of your burdens while transforming you into a deadly weapon. Unlike sport fighting arts that have been modified, and codified, and feminized to the point of absurdity, or even aestheticized to hide the true killing potential of the really cool moves in the forms (as is prevalent both in so-called traditional shaolin martial arts and wushu), shao-lin ninjitsu preserves shao-lin in all of its martial glory, completely ****genized and as applicable today as it was in yesteryear.

Shaolin ninjitsu was the stealth art practiced by the Ten Tigers of Canton, used for sneaking and reconnaisance in their protection of the province, modified from traditional japanese kata using Hung Gar. You will find a parallel for this transformation in the evolution of Okinawan Karate from Shaolin Crane, only in reverse.

Although many discredit Shao-lin Ninjitsu because of the apparent contradiction in cultures it presents, and are abhorred to learn that the beloved Fei Hung learned the deadly assassin's art, Shao-lin Ninjitsu is truly an art of peace. When involved in conflict, if you kill the aggressor, there is no more conflict, and peace resumes.

I am here at your disposal for any questions concerning my art. You can also speak with me at my Shao-lin Ninjitsu commune, assuming of course you bring proof of your Master's Degree receipt from an accredited university. We're located behind Crenshaw Yoga and Dance. You must enter the CYAD and ask to speak with Rose. When she asks you why you wish to learn Yoga and Dance, you must respond by saying that you seek the mind of the tiger spiritual, and she will usher you to my facility, which is tucked away behind the dance studio.

Good luck with your studies, everyone, and peace.

Grandmaster Sensei John Takeshi
8th Dan Shao-lin Ninjitsu, 8th Dan Tai Shing Pek Kwar

Student of Grandmaster Sensei Takeshi Ukeno
10th Dan Shao-lin Ninjitsu, 10th Dan Tai Shing Pek Kwar (of Chan Tai San lineage)

[NJM]

The 10 Tigers of Canton didn't do Shaolin Ninjutsu. My Bull**** detector is clicking away like crazy.

[bodhitree]

I have a masters degree and am willing to learn, Grandmaster Sensei.

[unkokusai]

Weren't you trying to sell this same snake oil over on another forum?

[SenseiShellie]

54th and Crenshaw is where he is located? How many African Americans do you train, John? You're right in the center of Gang Territory...

[John Takeshi]

54th and Crenshaw is where he is located? How many African Americans do you train, John? You're right in the center of Gang Territory...

I train where it's comfortable. I actually do not have any African Americans in my school, presently. I have in the past. It's not a racial thing. You just don't find that many locals with Master's Degrees on hand, you know? It's a terrible thing, the educational system around here. The only people I refuse to train are the Koreans. I do have a Latino gentleman in my commune, a refugee doctor from Nicaragua. I didn't ask many questions. He came knocking on my door, looking for assylum, suffering from a bullet wound in his left buttcheek. I helped him out. The rest of my students are generally Chinese, Japanese, and a couple of lowai. All well educated, and even weller trained.

[John Takeshi]

The 10 Tigers of Canton didn't do Shaolin Ninjutsu. My Bull**** detector is clicking away like crazy.

How do you know? Were you there? Do you have scrolls that tell the stories? Have you seen the stele erected in their honor? The reason you persist in your skepticism is that you simply have not heard of the tales, directly. Perhaps I shall delineate the history of the art on this web board, if everyone agrees to turn a willing ear.

The ten tigers of canton begat the art. They were far from the greatest masters of it. It was honed and perfected over time, kind of like the great masters of the Rococo.

I think that should demonstrate how apparently sophisitcated I am.

[John Takeshi]

During the squabbles that befell our clan while the Trifold Resistance in Bhutan set the government atwitter, Grandmaster Sensei Takeshi Ukeno told me of the history of our clan in exquisite detail, rendered plain unto my tongue, and unto his own. As is told in the stele erected in Guangdong, the Ten Tigers of Canton were in fact, not Shaolin monks, nor students of the temple proper. They were what are now called Shaolin lay disciples. None of them took classes in the temple, directly under sworn monks. They were, in fact, associates of the southern Shaolin Monastery at Jiulian Mountain. They learned their Shaolin from renegade monks who collected there after the original Shaolin monasteries were burned, and much knowledge was lost, and the gymnastic art of wushu took its place. As such, they were heirs to the entire spectrum of Shaolin arts, while all the rest of China proliferated balletic partial arts--as we call them derogatorily in our system. These systems include Tai Tzu, Northern Praying Mantis, Seven Star Mantis, Wing Chun, and all the other old opera systems, too many to name. None of these systems today is even a mere specter of what they once were. Only in the Shao-lin Ninjitsu propagated by the Ten Tigers, notably Wong Yan Lum (our patron saint, deus exultus maximus) do these martial arts remain unchanged and in their original form.

Although the Ten Tigers lived in the latter part of the Qing Dynasty in Guangdong Province, when the Manchus abused their powers, the Ten Tigers were not a unified group. They were, roughly, about two or three generations after the Five Shaolin Ancestors. The Ten Tigers were comprised of Wong Yan Lum (Master of Hop Gar, White Crane, and Lama kung fu), Wong Ching Ho, So Hark Fu, Wong Kei Ying, Wong Fai Hung (the son of Wong Kei Ying), Lai Yan Chiu, So Huk Yee, Ti Kiu Sam, Ti Chi Chan, and Tam Chai Hok..

Because of the dissolute political climate at work in China during these times, locals used to hire out martial arts masters to protect their cities, villages, and even provinces. Rather than settling disputes by war, all squabbles were carried out by death matches, leitei style, between the martial arts masters of each province. Southern China was particularly a mess, and the Ten Tigers of Canton were the ten martial arts masters that reigned during the height of hte chaos. They knew each other as Shaolin brothers, and formed a pact for peace in the realm. It was during their long lasting pact of peace that Shoji Hunakoshi, 10th Dan of Judo-Ninjutsu, began teaching his art in Guangdong, and attracted the martial interest of Wong Yan Lum's third nephew. News spread of Shoji's prowess, and soon Wong Yan Lum was enrolled in Shoji's ninjitsu commune. The rest, as they say, is history.

[John Takeshi]

For those who are interested, I have posted copies of old photos of the Ancient Scrolls of Shao-lin Ninjitsu, which are still on display in Guangdong today.

[John Takeshi]

I have a masters degree and am willing to learn, Grandmaster Sensei.

I need a copy of your Masters Degree, a letter of accreditation from your university, an educational record going back at least to 4th grade, and a family history delineating your racial heritage, to make sure there isn't any Korean in your blood.

You must also successfully complete one of our Iron Maiden Polygraphs, to ensure you are not a spy for Seiko Fujita's spawn of Satan, and run the gauntlet in under four minutes, without spilling more than a pint of blood--and you cannot get caught on the razorwire thermoban, despite the fact that it's been malfunctioning lately, and even I have gotten caught on it. We're working on that issue right now.

[unkokusai]

Psycho-troll! :rolleyes:

[John Takeshi]

Unko. We need some judges for our September kumite. How about helping out an old friend?

[bodhitree]

I need a copy of your Masters Degree, a letter of accreditation from your university, an educational record going back at least to 4th grade, and a family history delineating your racial heritage, to make sure there isn't any Korean in your blood.

You must also successfully complete one of our Iron Maiden Polygraphs, to ensure you are not a spy for Seiko Fujita's spawn of Satan, and run the gauntlet in under four minutes, without spilling more than a pint of blood--and you cannot get caught on the razorwire thermoban, despite the fact that it's been malfunctioning lately, and even I have gotten caught on it. We're working on that issue right now.

pm me a location/number to fax/mail the above mentioned documents.

[John Takeshi]

I don't do it by email, because I don't trust its security. You can reach us through Crenshaw Yoga and Dance. Our fax is down. Please send via US Mail. I prefer to do it in person, but if you must send it by ground, address it to Rose, ala ATTN: Rose.

[John Takeshi]

Sorry, I almost forgot to post the address:

Crenshaw Yoga and Dance
ATTN: Rose (I seek the mind of the tiger spiritual)
5426 Crenshaw Blvd
Los Angeles, CA 90043

We are located on Crenshaw Blvd between 54th and 57th St. You can park two blocks down and walk the rest.

[Royal Dragon]

What would happen if I just showed up when you were not there, acted like I was in charge and started teaching lessons?

[John Takeshi]

I'd bind you head and foot, turn you over to the Crenshaw Mafia, and let them run a train on you. They'd finish you off with an RNC.

By the way, their version of the Rear Naked Choke has very little to do with strangulation, and much to do with a Naked Rear.

[John Takeshi]

No, I'm just kidding. Of course.

You'd never be able to pull it off. You don't know what good Shao-lin looks like, so you'd be run through with Admiral Kwan's naginata before you had a chance to pollute our facility with your partial arts.

[unkokusai]

Unko. We need some judges for our September kumite. How about helping out an old friend?

Oh-ho, and to whom am I actually speaking? :confused:

[John Takeshi]

We don't need you to judge, silly. I need to borrow your passport, so we can get Hamurabi Sakurabi out of Kyoto.

[unkokusai]

You're really putting a lot of energy into this troll job, aren't you?

[NJM]

I think that should demonstrate how apparently sophisitcated I am.

Lolercaust.

[Pk_StyLeZ]

hahaha lol
wtf
dis fool here is funny

[ammocase]

54th and Crenshaw is where he is located? How many African Americans do you train, John? You're right in the center of Gang Territory...

What a stupid reply. Why are you concerned about how many african americans he trains? An gang territory? I take if your from you that everyone who lives there are black ... or that the area is only for gangs an owned by gangs... or that you have a single uneducated mind that automatically assumes all black people are in gangs... which stupid choice is it?

[ammocase]

An for the original question to this post... the answer is NO

[NJM]

What a stupid reply. Why are you concerned about how many african americans he trains? An gang territory? I take if your from you that everyone who lives there are black ... or that the area is only for gangs an owned by gangs... or that you have a single uneducated mind that automatically assumes all black people are in gangs... which stupid choice is it?

I don't think he was serious there, ammocase. Your classic post-millenium American anti-racism response was not only cliche, but uninformed.

[ammocase]

I don't think he was serious there, ammocase. Your classic post-millenium American anti-racism response was not only cliche, but uninformed.

Wow, i didnt know anti-racism was cliche....

An dont start a sentance with "I dont think" ending with the statement saying im " uninformed" within the same post...

[NJM]

It wasn't that anti-rascism is cliche, but the fact that you immediately jumped on him like we were having a witch hunt without realizing he wasn't insulting african americans but was insulting the leader of the dojo.

[ammocase]

It wasn't that anti-rascism is cliche, but the fact that you immediately jumped on him like we were having a witch hunt without realizing he wasn't insulting african americans but was insulting the leader of the dojo.

I immediately jumped on him? I'm well aware of the overall consensus of this post, everyone is cracking jokes on this guy whos claiming to teach Shaolin Ninjitsu. "Ninjitsu" is the improper spelling for the art by the way, its Ninjutsu, people who spell it that way are frauds, such as Frank Duxx ( who never proved these bloodsport matches, an whos teacher an style doesnt exist in any records ) an Ashida Kim ( who time an time again has be uncovered to be a fake ).

An again, saying how many African americans he teaches is a stupid question... what does that have to do with the post? An why connect it by saying hes in gang terriotory an saying hes teaching gangs... an where exactly did he insult the leader of the dojo? Oh wait... i see... to teach African Americans is an insult? Hmmmm now i get the point. Since all he wrote on his post was manily a question asking if he taught african americans, an since you claim hes trying to insult him.... hmmmmm nice point you brought up there... i never thought teaching a race would be seen as an "insult".

Nevermind, you clearly find it hard to explain your point. I'll just look at it as a informed person, an not see how stupid it was.

[NJM]

I interpreted the response as accusing the OP of being racist by implying he doesn't teach many african americans despite the fact there are a lot of them in the area, my gangsta. Reading between the lines.

[ammocase]

I interpreted the response as accusing the OP of being racist by implying he doesn't teach many african americans despite the fact there are a lot of them in the area, my gangsta. Reading between the lines.

Uhmm i read the comment where he says he doesnt teach african americans... an he stated their himself its not a rasict thing but that in the present he hasnt recieved students who are african american who own masters degree ... so how is that rasict? I know a lot of people who dont an will never own a masters degree, an im not black an neither are they. An that was a few posts down in response to that stupid comment. Maybe the " in between the lines" that your reading is blurred cause your so uninformed, gangsta?

An you do realise this is all a joke an the post is most likely a fake.

[TenTigers]

why do non-Asians always argue about the proper PHONETIC spelling of a CHINESE or JAPANESE Character? Jutsu,jitsu, all western romanizations.
sheesh!
Do me a favor, show me the brush stroked kanji, and point out the "U" part.

[lkfmdc]

this is all a joke an the post is most likely a fake.

no way, that be unpossible!

[ingchao]

"Partial Arts" :D:D:D:D:D

Freekin' Classic!!!!

But seriously, that's what I study.

"Admiral Kwan's naginata" - there's you're your tip-off of the validty of these posts.

Who calls him Admiral?

[NJM]

"Admiral Kwan's naginata" - there's you're your tip-off of the validty of these posts.

Who calls him Admiral?

Yeah, Admiral Kwan had a Naginata, and not the Kwan Dao he is famous for. Bodhidharma wore a kimono, too.

[Jingwu Man]

That picture you posted is of the dead sea scrolls!
Or perhaps the ancient shaolin wrote in Aramaic?
Be more inventive or at least careful in the future.

[NJM]

Seriously, this is the most effort I've seen put into a troll since a guy faked a lightsaber video to Rickroll people.

[bodhitree]

US mail is too slow, time is of the essence. I seem to be in a mixup with Libya's secret police as well as the CIA and a distinctly non-racially alligned gang (although African Americans are represented). It seems my cover has been outed. I'm boarding a 9:15am (EST) flight to LA, see you soon.

[SenseiShellie]

What a stupid reply. Why are you concerned about how many african americans he trains? An gang territory? I take if your from you that everyone who lives there are black ... or that the area is only for gangs an owned by gangs... or that you have a single uneducated mind that automatically assumes all black people are in gangs... which stupid choice is it?

I'm asking because it is a really bad area and is a Gang territory to a very notorious gang, the Crenshaw Mafia Gang. It's part of the Bloods. I'm not saying that it's an insult to teach them. I'm reading his location on his profile. 54th and Crenshaw. It's a predominantly African American neighborhood. That's why I'm asking. You don't have to go on a rant on me asking a stupid question...that's the area that he's in and it isn't stupid. It is a gang territory and is mostly African American.

[Judge Pen]

Great troll. .9987

[PangQuan]

Seriously, this is the most effort I've seen put into a troll since a guy faked a lightsaber video to Rickroll people.

This is actually kinda tame for John....;)

[unkokusai]

why do non-Asians always argue about the proper PHONETIC spelling of a CHINESE or JAPANESE Character? Jutsu,jitsu, all western romanizations.
sheesh!
Do me a favor, show me the brush stroked kanji, and point out the "U" part.

So if some non-native speaker of English started talking about 'Bawxing' you wouldn't correct them?

[NJM]

So if some non-native speaker of English started talking about 'Bawxing' you wouldn't correct them?

He was talking about changing the phonetics in transliterations, not changing the phonetics of a word in its original writing system.

[Siu Lum Fighter]

Wow, that is some seriously elaborate trolling. The only problem I have with it is that some total air head is likely to believe all of this bullsh!t and go down to Crenshaw to get himself killed.

[Satori Science]

Crap, I had my throwing stars, admirals outfit and tupac albums next to the door all ready to go and you guys had to spoil it.

By far the most entertaining thread of the summer.

[ammocase]

He was talking about changing the phonetics in transliterations, not changing the phonetics of a word in its original writing system.

Ummmm nice change in subject. Hatsumi is the last teacher of ninjutsu ( he can spell it anyway he wants an it will be the right way ), everyone came after him, even the other branches of ninjutsu came from him. An he uses Ninjutsu, the widely known fakes use Ninjitsu ( duxx an kim ) .. im sorry i didnt realise you were reading between the lines....

[NJM]

Ummmm nice change in subject. Hatsumi is the last teacher of ninjutsu ( he can spell it anyway he wants an it will be the right way ), everyone came after him, even the other branches of ninjutsu came from him. An he uses Ninjutsu, the widely known fakes use Ninjitsu ( duxx an kim ) .. im sorry i didnt realise you were reading between the lines....

Uh, lol? I was responding to unkokusai's post, not changing the subject.

[ammocase]

I'm asking because it is a really bad area and is a Gang territory to a very notorious gang, the Crenshaw Mafia Gang. It's part of the Bloods. I'm not saying that it's an insult to teach them. I'm reading his location on his profile. 54th and Crenshaw. It's a predominantly African American neighborhood. That's why I'm asking. You don't have to go on a rant on me asking a stupid question...that's the area that he's in and it isn't stupid. It is a gang territory and is mostly African American.

Oh i got you know... like when that guy said he trains in Maine i wisely cracked on asked how many Native Indians he taught hahahahahahaaaa!!!!!

I cant tell whos more retarded.. the main poster or the guy who said i asked a stupid question.... when he asked the stupid question.... dont try so hard....

[ammocase]

Uh, lol? I was responding to unkokusai's post, not changing the subject.


Umm no.. go back to the first page when you asked about it the first time ,mr. genuis gangsta.

[NJM]

Umm no.. go back to the first page when you asked about it the first time ,mr. genuis gangsta.

Yeah, but I wasn't trying to change the subject boyo.

[unkokusai]

He was talking about changing the phonetics in transliterations, not changing the phonetics of a word in its original writing system.



Would you correct him or wouldn't you?

[NJM]

Would you correct him or wouldn't you?

Yes, because your hypothetical speaker is not changing the phonetics of a transliterated word, rather he is changing the phonetics of a word in its own writing system.

[The Xia]

If you're new to the world of Kung Fu and have a questions like: "Is the systen known as Shaolin Ninjitsu real shaolin kung fu???"

I have answers.

Yes, it is for real. It may be the only thing that is real. If you have a Master's Degree from an accredited university, I can enlighten you and relieve you of your burdens while transforming you into a deadly weapon. Unlike sport fighting arts that have been modified, and codified, and feminized to the point of absurdity, or even aestheticized to hide the true killing potential of the really cool moves in the forms (as is prevalent both in so-called traditional shaolin martial arts and wushu), shao-lin ninjitsu preserves shao-lin in all of its martial glory, completely ****genized and as applicable today as it was in yesteryear.

Shaolin ninjitsu was the stealth art practiced by the Ten Tigers of Canton, used for sneaking and reconnaisance in their protection of the province, modified from traditional japanese kata using Hung Gar. You will find a parallel for this transformation in the evolution of Okinawan Karate from Shaolin Crane, only in reverse.

Although many discredit Shao-lin Ninjitsu because of the apparent contradiction in cultures it presents, and are abhorred to learn that the beloved Fei Hung learned the deadly assassin's art, Shao-lin Ninjitsu is truly an art of peace. When involved in conflict, if you kill the aggressor, there is no more conflict, and peace resumes.

I am here at your disposal for any questions concerning my art. You can also speak with me at my Shao-lin Ninjitsu commune, assuming of course you bring proof of your Master's Degree receipt from an accredited university. We're located behind Crenshaw Yoga and Dance. You must enter the CYAD and ask to speak with Rose. When she asks you why you wish to learn Yoga and Dance, you must respond by saying that you seek the mind of the tiger spiritual, and she will usher you to my facility, which is tucked away behind the dance studio.

Good luck with your studies, everyone, and peace.

Grandmaster Sensei John Takeshi
8th Dan Shao-lin Ninjitsu, 8th Dan Tai Shing Pek Kwar

Student of Grandmaster Sensei Takeshi Ukeno
10th Dan Shao-lin Ninjitsu, 10th Dan Tai Shing Pek Kwar (of Chan Tai San lineage)
Can you please list and describe each form in Shao-lin Ninjitsu?

[NJM]

Can you please list and describe each form in Shao-lin Ninjitsu?

Five Ryu, Tam Tukashi, shongshan-do...

[bodhitree]

Can you please list and describe each form in Shao-lin Ninjitsu?

Fool! Shaolin Ninjitsu is the form of formlessness. Where is your proof that you have a masters degree? You think you will learn the secrets, HA!

[lkfmdc]

I didn't want to have to embrass John like this, but.......

[unkokusai]

Yes, because your hypothetical speaker is not changing the phonetics of a transliterated word, rather he is changing the phonetics of a word in its own writing system.

Ok, and if a native Japanese speaker were to write the word for 'beer' by using the Katagana for 'biaru' instead of 'biru' another native Japanese speaker who knew better would be justified in correcting him, right?

[John Takeshi]

What a stupid reply. Why are you concerned about how many african americans he trains? An gang territory? I take if your from you that everyone who lives there are black ... or that the area is only for gangs an owned by gangs... or that you have a single uneducated mind that automatically assumes all black people are in gangs... which stupid choice is it?

This is exactly right. The implication seemed to be that everyone in this territory was a part of a gang, and everyone in the territory has to be black. As I said, I have a school located at 54th and Crenshaw, and none of my students are black. Again, as I stated before as well: I am located behind Crenshaw Yoga and Dance. Believe me, not everyone here is a "gangsta" (that, my friends, is poor grammar). Would "gangstas" be doing yoga, or dancing? And we're not talking any of that jive hoodlum nonsense, like crippin' or breakin'....or whatsoever it is they call those antics nowadays. We're talking modern, balletic dancing, that verily exudes the essences of grace. As it is, all of my students are required to complete 3 years of modern dance under the tutelage of its senior instructor to amplify their graceful movements.


It seems to me that the Koreans are the main problem in this area. They operate most of the local convenience stores, and generally give the locals a hard time when they're shopping. They think all the black people are stealing from them. A man can't even purchase a forty without being tailed by one of the clerks, suspiciously.

I have worked out various deals with the Crenshaw Mafia to keep myself and the students safe, but I would dare say--they look out for me twice as hard, to keep themselves and their homies safe.

Shao-lin Ninjitsu is true. You can believe me. I practice it daily. Scout's honor.:)

[John Takeshi]

"Admiral Kwan's naginata" - there's you're your tip-off of the validty of these posts.

Who calls him Admiral?

Before the westernization of my homeland, the title "General" was not in existence. He was called "Admiral" not so much because that was his official title, so much as it was the best approximation that Grandmaster Sensei had when translating his name. Technically, it is "Divine Guardian Guan Yu." Admiral is a good translation/transliteration for "Guardian," and suggested how admirable he truly was.

As for the naginata, it's the same weapon as the kwan dao. Or at least it used to be, before the samurai changed it because of stringent local laws imposed upon them by the shogun, which barred all chinese martial arts and chinese weapons. We adopted the naginata to conform to the laws, and the shogun let us be for the time.

[John Takeshi]

"Ninjitsu" is the improper spelling for the art by the way, its Ninjutsu, people who spell it that way are frauds, such as Frank Duxx ( who never proved these bloodsport matches, an whos teacher an style doesnt exist in any records ) an Ashida Kim ( who time an time again has be uncovered to be a fake )..


You obviously have no idea whatsoever about what you are talking about.

Ninjitsu is the same word as Ninjutsu. I am a ninja. I am not a nunja, or a ninju. Wehether or not we practice ninjitsu or ninjutsu, all who swear an oath to the life are ninja.

You are obviously a nincompoop. Or is it nuncumpup?

[John Takeshi]

Ummmm nice change in subject. Hatsumi is the last teacher of ninjutsu ( he can spell it anyway he wants an it will be the right way ), everyone came after him, even the other branches of ninjutsu came from him. An he uses Ninjutsu, the widely known fakes use Ninjitsu ( duxx an kim ) .. im sorry i didnt realise you were reading between the lines....


Really? Hatsumi? When he attended our semi-annual kumite in May of 2000, he provided notes on the seminar he was teaching (Shao-lin double shuriken ch'uan), and spelled his name Hatsumy. It was a mis-translation/transliteration. By your very standards, Hatsumi was wrong about his name, engaged himself in a logical paradox, and unmade himself with poor spelling.

[John Takeshi]

Can you please list and describe each form in Shao-lin Ninjitsu?

Here are the few I'm sure you're familiar with, and won't compromise the art:

Big 6-Fist (I think it's equivalent in Chinese is Big Red Fist)

Linen Fist

Admiral Kwan's Green Dragon Naginata

Shao-lin Katana-do

White Simian Soils the Caravan (Move-for-move two-man form from Sevenstar Mantis, I believe.....I generally forget what the modern chinese counterpart for this form is). Strangely enough, ours is a move for move counterpart of the chinese form. If you perform White Ape Exits the Caravan and White Ape Soils the Caravan together as one, it is quite a sight to behold.

[John Takeshi]

Fool! Shaolin Ninjitsu is the form of formlessness. Where is your proof that you have a masters degree? You think you will learn the secrets, HA!

Ah, but how does one achieve formlessness if one has no knowledge of form? The mind is essentialy a body-form, though its essence is formlessness. Just so is Shaolin Ninjitsu formless in its essence, although patterned upon the metaphysical tiger spiritual contained in kuen and katas.

I have not heard from you. I am beginning to think that I am being punked. I really don't appreicate it.

I gave your cot to the dog.

[John Takeshi]

Here is the only sanctioned video feed of The Black Dragon Fighting Society's version of the Kata Dante. Although theirs is of a lineage different from ours (I believe from So Huk Yee, if I am not mistaken [and I've only been proven mistaken once, but remedied it by shredding, whiting-out, and burning the record of it, though I should have paid attention to the order in which I did that, because it made the process that much more difficult to execute]), it is essentially the same. I always thought Ashida Kim had a good grip on the movements, but he lacked a certain, I don't know, ninja essence to his techniques, and made them look kind of "wushuy" when performed. He didn't seem to understand the principles of the movements. But I'm not going to get embroiled in that controversy right now.

Here is a close approximation of one of our highest level Shao-lin forms:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ymQh9rLgQyU

[cjurakpt]

I gave your cot to the dog.

usually you have to pay admission somewhere to hear material this good...

[John Takeshi]

I forgot to mention: if you pause that video at 2:40, you can see me in the front row to the right of the pole at the head of the line. I attended that seminar, but was not pleased with the lack of true ninja principles in the forms. I never liked Kim's "wushuy" take on their execution. You don't notice it in the video, but I was the only one not to bow after he bowed to us at the end. It set off a schism between myself and Grandmaster Kim, and forever put me in bad standing with the Black Dragon Fighting Society.

I do kind of miss their fellowship.

C'est la vie.

I think that aptly demonstrates how worldly I am.

[tattooedmonk]

Here is the only sanctioned video feed of The Black Dragon Fighting Society's version of the Kata Dante. Although theirs is of a lineage different from ours (I believe from So Huk Yee, if I am not mistaken [and I've only been proven mistaken once, but remedied it by shredding, whiting-out, and burning the record of it, though I should have paid attention to the order in which I did that, because it made the process that much more difficult to execute]), it is essentially the same. I always thought Ashida Kim had a good grip on the movements, but he lacked a certain, I don't know, ninja essence to his techniques, and made them look kind of "wushuy" when performed. He didn't seem to understand the principles of the movements. But I'm not going to get embroiled in that controversy right now.

Here is a close approximation of one of our highest level Shao-lin forms:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ymQh9rLgQyUOh brother.:rolleyes: Controversy??Are you saying that you are Lin Kuei( Forrest Demon)??This Sh!t is toooooo funny.

[John Takeshi]

I am saying nothing of the sort. It is not funny. It is personal, and it closed a very important chapter in my life.

I don't appreciate it when people read through my life as if it were a Danielle Steele novel, or Yahweh forbid, Harry Potter, and then rip it apart and deconstruct it as if it were something to be pandered and parodied as inconsequential.

Where is the brotherhood of martial artists? Why can we not speak our minds and hearts without being shat upon (forgive the strong language) by the cynics who have squelched every last spark of romanticism and independent intellection in this great nation of ours?

Must we always be judged? Must we always judge?

[John Takeshi]

I would nominate myself for cryosleep, had I the option. I would like to see an era where humanity has a rebirth, for it is dead in this era of ours.

God save us all.

God save the president.

I am going to go run the gauntlet. Razorwire thermoban be ****ed.

[John Takeshi]

Wow, that is some seriously elaborate trolling. The only problem I have with it is that some total air head is likely to believe all of this bullsh!t and go down to Crenshaw to get himself killed.

Trolling? What does fishing have to do with this? BTW, not everyone who goes to Crenshaw gets himself killed. People live there. If they go out of town, then come back home, are they going to get killed? By your own logic, everyone in Crenshaw is DOA.



















































**Disclaimer: some people who go to Crenshaw get themselves killed.

[PangQuan]

See THIS is the reason my Shao-lin Ninjitsu Clan has always been so opposed to your antics Takeshi Sensei. You are too out spoken with our art.

Our clan has forever hid within the shadows of society as we have been taught since day one of training within the Grand Spiritual Tiger Hall.

YOU KNOW THIS!

Yet repeatedly we find you trying to share our forbidden arts with the public.

You KNOW some silly degree from some university is not enough to qualify one as being unified within the mind of the eye of the tiger SPIRITUAL!

I have held my tongue long enough, This must STOP.

You anger the elders.

[John Takeshi]

As I said, PangQuan, I am no longer a part of the Black Dragon Fighting Society. I'm not afraid of the elders, though I do have respect for them.

And I have not spoken of things that are "inside" information. The Big 6-Fist and Shaolin Katana-do are all pretty standard material, and Ashida Kim liscensed the display of his lineage of the Kata Dante long ago.

I was on the committee that sanctioned its public release in South Africa decades ago.

[PangQuan]

Well, as a former BDFS brother in shadows, I personally wont involve myself nor my squad in your silencing, unless of course the Elders command it so. But you know how that is....the eye of the mind within the spiritual of the phoenix tiger eye.

Though likely the elders still fear your retaliation from your episode 8 years ago in Okinawa, so from this vantage point atop my mountain temple all looks as snow upon a midnight river bed.

I myself grow weary of the clans increased involvment in political affairs, something you know me to be against.

Ah I long for the old days when the elders were satisfied with the quenching of our blades on the blood of the unworthy opponents....now all I seem to hear about is Iraq.

But I digress...

I must say the tongue lashing I was ordered to issue fell a bit short of vengeful as I am sympathetic to your aim, and I value your goals as I feel they are in tune with the true aspect of the tigers essence of spritual mind.

Take care John and keep an ear to the shadows. You never know when the elders will attempt again what has thrice been thwarted in the past.

[NJM]

Ok, and if a native Japanese speaker were to write the word for 'beer' by using the Katagana for 'biaru' instead of 'biru' another native Japanese speaker who knew better would be justified in correcting him, right?

It depends on how it is pronnounced. If it's ambiguous, wgaf?

[unkokusai]

It depends on how it is pronnounced.

Ah-ha, and the word 'Jujutsu' is not pronounced in the language of origin with an 'i' sound in the second syllable. The common mistransliteration stems from the practice of a phonetic spelling of a Brazillian-Portuguese accent in trying to pronounce the orgininal word. In that sense, I guess its suitable enough for BJJ, but not for other contexts.

[bodhitree]

Grandmaster Sensei


I have had some minor setbacks on the way to Los Angeles, they have infiltrated the aviation system, and I will be making my pilgrimage by car. Rest Assured, you are not being punked.


As for Lodgings, my car is quite spacious so I don't need a cot.


See you within a few days.

[John Takeshi]

I'd recommend parking someplace a couple of miles away from the school, and commuting. Or, put your car in an extended stay parking garage, or personal storage unit (being such that if you pass our preliminary eliminations, you can stay on as a lodger; and if you don't, you might perish on the razorwire thermoban)---but I wouldn't sleep in your car. I'm not saying that black people are going to steal your car or kill you in your sleep (like Sensei Shellie seemed to insinuate), but there are some Koreans in Crenshaw that will steal your car and kill you on sight.

[synack]

I'd recommend parking someplace a couple of miles away from the school, and commuting. Or, put your car in an extended stay parking garage, or personal storage unit (being such that if you pass our preliminary eliminations, you can stay on as a lodger; and if you don't, you might perish on the razorwire thermoban)---but I wouldn't sleep in your car. I'm not saying that black people are going to steal your car or kill you in your sleep (like Sensei Shellie seemed to insinuate), but there are some Koreans in Crenshaw that will steal your car and kill you on sight.

:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

[SenseiShellie]

I'd recommend parking someplace a couple of miles away from the school, and commuting. Or, put your car in an extended stay parking garage, or personal storage unit (being such that if you pass our preliminary eliminations, you can stay on as a lodger; and if you don't, you might perish on the razorwire thermoban)---but I wouldn't sleep in your car. I'm not saying that black people are going to steal your car or kill you in your sleep (like Sensei Shellie seemed to insinuate), but there are some Koreans in Crenshaw that will steal your car and kill you on sight.

You idiot. I didn't insinuate that. Crenshaw is a predominantly African American neighborhood. That's why I asked you if you had any African American students. It's a numbers game...if you are going to be in an area, you're going to attract people that mostly live in the area.

[John Takeshi]

You idiot. I didn't insinuate that. Crenshaw is a predominantly African American neighborhood. That's why I asked you if you had any African American students. It's a numbers game...if you are going to be in an area, you're going to attract people that mostly live in the area.

I'm not an idiot, and I don't think this is the place for name-calling, honeybritches. While Crenshaw does have a population formulated partially by African Americans, it isn't dominated by them at all. They don't hold it hostage like a bunch of hoodlums and gangsters, at gunpoint, blindfolded, and perhaps in S & M bondage like a dominatrix. Why do blacks have to sound so agressive, and why do you think they have a predilection for bullying and domination? Anyone can go there at any time (I just don't recommend at night). I invite you to come on down and visit one of our classes (assuming, of course, you have a Master's Degree from an accredited university). At the very worst, you could attend a Yoga class or modern dance, if I refuse your admittance based on your qualifications.

As for numbers......it's a race thing with you, it seems. All of your posts on this thread seem to mention African Americans, gangs, Crenshaw, and violence. I hate to have to be the one to add one and one, but I did, and it equals two.

I think that should demonstrate how clever I am at wording things.

[SenseiShellie]

I'm not an idiot, and I don't think this is the place for name-calling, honeybritches. While Crenshaw does have a population formulated partially by African Americans, it isn't dominated by them at all. They don't hold it hostage like a bunch of hoodlums and gangsters, at gunpoint, blindfolded, and perhaps in S & M bondage like a dominatrix. Why do blacks have to sound so agressive, and why do you think they have a predilection for bullying and domination? Anyone can go there at any time (I just don't recommend at night). I invite you to come on down and visit one of our classes (assuming, of course, you have a Master's Degree from an accredited university). At the very worst, you could attend a Yoga class or modern dance, if I refuse your admittance based on your qualifications.

As for numbers......it's a race thing with you, it seems. All of your posts on this thread seem to mention African Americans, gangs, Crenshaw, and violence. I hate to have to be the one to add one and one, but I did, and it equals two.

I think that should demonstrate how clever I am at wording things.


My original post asked you how many you taught. I never said any of what you are insinuating. You're just in a rough neighborhood. It's a Blood Gang Territory. That doesn't mean that there aren't other races present in Crenshaw. However, it's not a race issue. It's a numbers game when business comes into play. Let me give you an example. My family owns a business in North Hollywood. The dominant population is ****sexual couples (male and female). His most dominant customer population is ****sexual couples. Does that mean he doesn't have other people come in? No. It just means that is his dominant customer cliental. I am in Graduate school now, so I don't have a Master's degree yet. I will though in 2 years. Presuming you're still there, I'll come by. I hope a degree from USC Medical School will be enough for your qualifications.

[The Xia]

Here are the few I'm sure you're familiar with, and won't compromise the art:

Big 6-Fist (I think it's equivalent in Chinese is Big Red Fist)

Linen Fist

Admiral Kwan's Green Dragon Naginata

Shao-lin Katana-do

White Simian Soils the Caravan (Move-for-move two-man form from Sevenstar Mantis, I believe.....I generally forget what the modern chinese counterpart for this form is). Strangely enough, ours is a move for move counterpart of the chinese form. If you perform White Ape Exits the Caravan and White Ape Soils the Caravan together as one, it is quite a sight to behold.
Yes. I am familiar with them. After all, those are essential to mastering the Judo Fist, which is essential in acquiring the mind of the tiger spiritual. How's about we discuss the spiritualization of the tiger mind. I'm sure this is a shared goal for all of us.

[cjurakpt]

the spiritual mind of the tiger's eye is in essence the inner tiger spirit of the mind's eye

you cannot deny the incredible force with which this realization has come over you at this very moment; you are awash in the tsunammi of the downright sheerawesity of this exatamundo statement

when the trembling ceases, enlightenment commences...

[John Takeshi]

I think you'll be happy to know I signed up a black student today. After we commenced formalities and he completed the gauntlet run, with an impressive diagonal flip through the razorwire thermoban, I asked him if there were any other African Americans in the neighboring community he could refer to the school. He looked at me like I was plumb crazy, mate.

BTW, he had a Master's from USC in Biochemical Endocrinology. He must be very smart. Maybe you know him?

I haven't gotten his background check back yet.

[John Takeshi]

Let me give you an example. My family owns a business in North Hollywood. The dominant population is ****sexual couples (male and female). His most dominant customer population is ****sexual couples. Does that mean he doesn't have other people come in? No. It just means that is his dominant customer cliental. I am in Graduate school now, so I don't have a Master's degree yet. I will though in 2 years. Presuming you're still there, I'll come by. I hope a degree from USC Medical School will be enough for your qualifications.

Is it a gay bar? I'm not saying all bars in North Hollywood cater to that decrepit caste of human sexuality. But it certainly would skew the demographic, wouldn't it?

[John Takeshi]

Yes. I am familiar with them. After all, those are essential to mastering the Judo Fist, which is essential in acquiring the mind of the tiger spiritual. How's about we discuss the spiritualization of the tiger mind. I'm sure this is a shared goal for all of us.

I see you are not familiar with the Judo Fist, though, which is in fact essential to forming the basic foundation for the referral towards the acquisition of the mind of the tiger spiritual.

I will explain it in gross terms:

When one knows the mind of the tiger spiritual, the spiritualization becomes the tiger mind. The mind of the tiger is a spiritual entity, coposed of biological components, which retain an essence of spirituality hearkening back to those moments before the conception vessel came into being, whereby the spiritual stamp of the tiger's mind was impressed upon the mortal coil. Those who have yet to mature into the tiger spiritual are mere cubs weaning at the teat of the promise of the enlightening pap to be had at will when the mind spiritualizes the tiger's essence through the magnificent transformation called the Acquisition. All who possess the tiger spiritual, and are possessed by it, are known as Acquisitors. I am a Grand Acquisitor of the third order. Grandmaster Sensei is the Grandestined Acquisitor (a title achieved at the fourth order). He has sucked at the teat, tasted the pap, developed the tiger spiritual, and become the spiritual tiger. I am but a poor poor shade of the spirit, full of transgressions and wayward thoughts, awaiting the liberation of the ethereal ectodoshin, when I shall pass on into the plane of ultimate spiritual tigerness, as I step into the final frontier of the Grandestination, a land of milk and honeys.

[John Takeshi]

Is it a gay bar? I'm not saying all bars in North Hollywood cater to that decrepit caste of human sexuality. But it certainly would skew the demographic, wouldn't it?

Edit: I didn't mean to say decrepit....as that is a very judgmental term. I meant to say "delicate".

[John Takeshi]

In addition to teaching traditional Shao-lin Ninjitsu, taken directly fron Wong Yan Lum lineage, we also teach Takeshi Ukeno's family style Judo, which has close links to Wing Chun and Capoeira.

I enjoy them all, but consider the 3 section staff to be my greatest strength, (besides my intelligence, of course); although I am nowhere near as intelligent as Grandmaster Sensei, who has a 180 IQ.

I think that should show how humble I am in the face of true greatness.

[John Takeshi]

See you within a few days.

And I have yet to hear from you. Did you eat some bad pork, dear enlightened one?:rolleyes:

[SenseiShellie]

Is it a gay bar? I'm not saying all bars in North Hollywood cater to that decrepit caste of human sexuality. But it certainly would skew the demographic, wouldn't it?

Nope. It's an Italian Restaurant. Been there for 35 years.

[SenseiShellie]

I think you'll be happy to know I signed up a black student today. After we commenced formalities and he completed the gauntlet run, with an impressive diagonal flip through the razorwire thermoban, I asked him if there were any other African Americans in the neighboring community he could refer to the school. He looked at me like I was plumb crazy, mate.

BTW, he had a Master's from USC in Biochemical Endocrinology. He must be very smart. Maybe you know him?

I haven't gotten his background check back yet.

I just started, so I probably wouldn't know him. We would also be on different campus's. I am at the campus in East LA.

[John Takeshi]

He said he's a little east-northeast of there.

I'm beginning to get a little suspicious of him.

I asked him what mammalian Proprotein convertases and metalloendopeptidase were. He shrugged. I suggested that while serine proteinases are largely responsible for activating precursors of hormones, enzymes, growth and transcription factors, receptors, as well as envelope proteins of infectious viruses and bacteria, that ARTc plays a far more important role in the cytosol and at the cell surface.

He just smiled wanly and replied: "Yup."

Funny thing is, it's NRDc that plays a far more important role in the cytosol and at the cell surface. I made up ARTc.

I think that demonstrates how very cunning I am.

Plus, he has a tattoo of Little Nemo on his left ankle.

Maybe I'm jaded, or maybe my ninja senses are picking something up. Something fishy is afoot.

[John Takeshi]

Being a Third Level Acquisitor of the High Order of Shao-lin Ninjitsu, I am a conduit for the Infinite Spirit of Life that lives, dwells and has His Human Being within the Soul Bounty of every man, woman and child of this earth plane.

Since all beings on this earth plane are joined in the solicitous quintessence of the tiger spiritual contained in the vessel conceived in liberty, I have access to their innermost thoughts and desires. This is extremely felicitous knowledge to have, for it makes my missions that much easier.

Once, I was a child. I was unaware of the blissful reality of the vicarious spiritual to be owned. And then I became a man, as a First Level Acquisitor, acquiring the spiritual tangential. At last I became a master, having reached the Second Level of Acquisition, whereby one becomes the memory master of personal comprehension in the purpose of life, liberty, and personal property. But the eccentricity of the spiritual tangential, it's very accidental ectodoshinity, if you must, was still beyond my grasp. And then I became something not quite man, not quite divine, as I shed the vestments of this mortal coil, and clothed myself in righteous cloth, forged in the fires the Vulcan's smithy, attended by garpies and centaurs (symbolically), of a spiritual realm. Of course, all of this metaphysical imagery is but a similacrum of linguistic and mythological structures aimed at defining an experience beyond experience; but such are the restrictions of the tongue, given unto man.

I am reminded of the story of the wise dragon, who once told the turtle: "You cannot hide from the dangers of the marsh by retreating into darkness. One must become a child of light, to tread willingly into the jaws of the lion without fear, unafraid." But the turtle replied: "It is easier to retreat. See?" And it retreated into its shell. Shortly, a troop of hunters passed by. One of them stumbled upon the shell and called to his mates: "Oi! Kindred! I tripped on a turtle shell!" Then he got an idea. "Oi, I bet this juicy turtle shell would make a fine piece of bait for the lion we're about to go hunting!" And verily did he take the turtle for this purpose. When the hunting party arrived at the hunt, and spotted the lion in his den, they threw unto the beast the turtle hiding in its shell, and it was eaten.

The moral of the story is about protection and safety, and I advise you all to use protection when engaging in sexual congress.

Good day.

[John Takeshi]

That's it. The black guy is out.

We no longer have any African Americans enrolled at the Shao-lin Ninjitsu Commune.

He had the nerve to fork over a Master's he'd recieved from USC; but through some computer fluke, he'd gotten the degree without having completed 3 credit hours. USC's records show him short of graduation, but he had the piece of paper.

Credit goes to our Shao-lin Ninjitsu intern, Dan Kirkland, for his research into this imposter.;)

Well done.

Another one bites the dust.

[SenseiShellie]

That's it. The black guy is out.

We no longer have any African Americans enrolled at the Shao-lin Ninjitsu Commune.

He had the nerve to fork over a Master's he'd recieved from USC; but through some computer fluke, he'd gotten the degree without having completed 3 credit hours. USC's records show him short of graduation, but he had the piece of paper.

Credit goes to our Shao-lin Ninjitsu intern, Dan Kirkland, for his research into this imposter.;)

Well done.

Another one bites the dust.

John, I didn't want to tell you this but Keck (USC's Med School) only has one campus. I wanted you to ask him the school that he was at. The other HHS campus is in Alhambra and not East LA. He was trying to pull one over on you guys...

[The Xia]

I see you are not familiar with the Judo Fist, though, which is in fact essential to forming the basic foundation for the referral towards the acquisition of the mind of the tiger spiritual.
I prefer to think of myself as being the Judo Fist. I think that should demonstrate how deep my philosophy is. By now you are likely wondering what clan I am part of. I am a 30th Dan Grandmaster Guru Sensei in the Wudang-Shaolin Ninja Do Pai. My clan was founded in the Three Kingdoms period by General Tso. I was taught Wudang-Shaolin Ninjitsu, Greco-Roman Aiki-Ninjitsu, Brazilian Ninjitsu, General Tso’s Chicken Fist, Dim Mak-Jutsu, Judo Katana Chuan, and Samurai Tai Chi Fut Chuan by Abbot David Carradine of the Shaolin Temple. One of many differences between my clan and others is our strong emphasis on the mind of the dragon spiritual, which blends well with the essence of enlightenment of the tiger spiritual.

[John Takeshi]

If you do in fact consider yourself to be the judo fist, then contemplate this and explain it in detail:

The essence of the tiger spiritual is inspired by the negro spiritual.

I give you one week, and not a day more. If you don't reply by then, then you have failed, and I call "Fraud!" upon your antics.

[The Xia]

The highest rank within the Wudang Shaolin Ninja Do Pai is 35th Dan. Didn’t you get the memo from the last inter-clan conference?

If you do in fact consider yourself to be the judo fist, then contemplate this and explain it in detail:

The essence of the tiger spiritual was inspired by a negro spiritual.

I give you one week, and not a day more. If you don't reply by then, then you have failed, and I call "Fraud!" upon your antics.
In our clan, we seek the mind of the dragon spiritual. A mere acquisition of the Judo Fist would make the mind of the dragon spiritual a far more difficult goal. Therefore, we become the Judo Fist in order to cultivate the spiritual in a way that is more appropriate to the mind of the dragon spiritual. This was explained at the first inter-clan conference. Didn't Grandmaster Sensei Takeshi Ukeno give you the memo?

[John Takeshi]

Go ahead and make your jokes. I explained in the first posting how to make contact with the commune. You have to talk to Rose, show her your Masters Degree, and say: "I seek the mind of the tiger spiritual."

Honestly, I think this last poster is just a troll. And as for Bootytree and the Xia-yster--what goes around comes around.

I think this shows how quick I am at come-backs.

[The Xia]

And as for Bootytree and the Xia-yster--what goes around comes around.
I've always found inter-clan politics to be a distasteful matter, but if you have a gripe with the Wudang Shaolin Ninja Do Pai please state it in clarity. And please do not lump the statements of "Bootytree" together with the Wudang Shaolin Ninja Do Pai.

[John Takeshi]

I've always found inter-clan politics to be a distasteful matter, but if you have a gripe with the Wudang Shaolin Ninja Do Pai please state it in clarity. And please do not lump the statements of "Bootytree" together with the Wudang Shaolin Ninja Do Pai.

That doesn't even exist! You're just making stuff up, and adding to the large stockpile of misinformation on KFM!

Don't you dare make me start another "Misinformation on KFM" thread. I'll expose you all!

[John Takeshi]

Watch your sixes, you reprobates! Keep an eye on your evening ninjadows!

[John Takeshi]

Until the late unpleasantness and mud-slinging abates on this forum, I'm afraid I'm going to have to reinstate the following stipulations regarding how and when, and under what circumstances my words are/may be used:


Due to some recent postings by some ill-demeanored fellows on this forum, which tried unsuccesfully to drag my name through the mud, I'd appreciate it if all of you would PM me in advance before you use my name in a posting.

This way, I can keep track of the kinds of misinformation being spread throughout the forum. I shall extend the same courtesies to you as well.

[John Takeshi]

If you want the truth, it's there for you to seek. All you need to do is complete a full curriculum at a local university required for a Master's Degree (in any field except Home Economics), not be a woman, and be of sound mind (although if you're not the former, you will surely be the latter).

[The Xia]

Why do you need your students to have Master's Degrees?

[John Takeshi]

I shall tell thee on the morrow, if I feel up to it. I'm not talking to you right now.

[John Takeshi]

Being the idiot I am I drove out to South Central in search of Shaolin Ninjitsu Commune, 5426 Crenshaw Blvd, behind Crenshaw Yoga & Dance. I found the shopping center but I guess they engaged their Klingon cloaking device when I was detected by their sensors. No Shaolin Ninjitsu Commune and no Crenshaw Yoga & Dance was found by me and I looked for a while. I asked a Korean lady at a near by liquor store and she just pretended she did not hear me but watched me very carefully to make sure I did not steal on the way out.

John Takeshi you owe me gas money!!!:D:p;):rolleyes:

I'm not saying you're obtuse, but only someone who was very obtuse would come to the conclusion that our commune is physically behind Crenshaw Yoga and Dance. We're behind Crenshaw Yoga and Dance, much in the manner that LBJ was behind the Kennedy assassination, Bill Murray was behind Garfield in those adorable movies, IBM was behind the Nazi eugenics-and-extermination program, and President Bush and Condeleeza Rice were behind the levy malfunctions in New Orleans.

I mean, I've heard of obtuse. But we're pushing 160 degrees, here, people!

The only reason I give an iota of credence to your tale, is the mention of the Korean store lady who was watching you like a hawk, or whatever kind of predatory bird they have in Korea.

[John Takeshi]

There are those on this forum who would debate Grandmaster Sensei Chan Tai San's role in a chinese/japanese martial art, namely Shao-lin Ninjitsu. They say he was purely Lama Pai, and had no Tai Shing Pek Kwar, much less any ties to ninjitsu.

I submit:

Was he not addressed as Chan Tai San?

Granted, we never called him Chan Tai Sama, mostly because we did not bear for him that kind of reverence; and he seemed contented with San in formalized settings; and everyone knows that Grandmaster Sensei Takeshi Ukeno-sama would never have stood for it.

[wiz cool c]

Dude get a life.

[NJM]

I drove out to South Central in search of Shaolin Ninjitsu Commune:

Bothan Cloaking Device, not that Klingon whatchamacallit.

[Lamassu]

Was he not addressed as Chan Tai San?

Granted, we never called him Chan Tai Sama, mostly because we did not bear for him that kind of reverence; and he seemed contented with San in formalized settings; and everyone knows that Grandmaster Sensei Takeshi Ukeno-sama would never have stood for it.

I'm glad to see the Shaolin Ninjas taking this so seriously, because not all grandmasters deserve your reverence, and Chan Tai San should feel grateful that you and your students decide to add 'san' after his name in the first place. However, I would keep a close eye on him, because my tiger spiritual tells me that Chan Tai is planning to assinate and usurp Grandmaster Sensei Takeshi Ukeno-sama as ruler of Shaolin Ninjitsu. Perhaps you should organize a small band and teach this insect who the Grandmaster Sensei really is, I'm sure Takeshi Ukeno-sama would appreciate your loyalty and reward you handsomely. This should be evident at how clever I am.

[NJM]

There are those on this forum who would debate Grandmaster Sensei Chan Tai San's role in a chinese/japanese martial art, namely Shao-lin Ninjitsu. They say he was purely Lama Pai, and had no Tai Shing Pek Kwar, much less any ties to ninjitsu.

I submit:

Was he not addressed as Chan Tai San?

Granted, we never called him Chan Tai Sama, mostly because we did not bear for him that kind of reverence; and he seemed contented with San in formalized settings; and everyone knows that Grandmaster Sensei Takeshi Ukeno-sama would never have stood for it.

Why do you only allow students with Master's Degrees to join? Not good enough to set your limit at Ph D's?

[John Takeshi]

There are several reasons I require a Master's Degree:

1. It verifies your intelligence. (PhD's don't require intelligence or perserverence;
only good connections in the educational community).
2. It verifies your maturity. (Bachelor's Degrees should be called "Kiddie"
Degrees).
3. I require a certain level of institutionalized, contemporary education, so that
when I decide to completely break my student's mind, will, and spirit, he will
see how useless are the ways of this world, and how foolish it was to spend
his time in service to those whose methods of "teaching" are far inferior to
mine own, and he will dedicate himself to the clan with even more dedication and stuff.

[John Takeshi]

Our September kumite is coming up.

I'd like to extend an invitation for attendance to those from KFM who are locals. Everyone is welcome. There won't be an entrance fee, but there will be a seating fee ($25.00/hour). Like any high culture event, there will be no seating once the kumite is in progress. If anyone wishes to challenge a participant, he must be wearing regulation attire.

I'd also like to take this opportunity to invite Lokhopkuen. I wish to fight you in the main event. I do not take challenges lightly, or personally, so I can keep this professional. I want to destroy you.

You have challenged me, and offended me personally. There will be nothing "soft" about this, softy.

The kumite is on for Saturday the 29th.

Get ready. September 29th approaches.

[Daniel09]

There are several reasons I require a Master's Degree:

1. It verifies your intelligence. (PhD's don't require intelligence or perserverence;
only good connections in the educational community).
2. It verifies your maturity. (Bachelor's Degrees should be called "Kiddie"
Degrees).
3. I require a certain level of institutionalized, contemporary education, so that
when I decide to completely break my student's mind, will, and spirit, he will
see how useless are the ways of this world, and how foolish it was to spend
his time in service to those whose methods of "teaching" are far inferior to
mine own, and he will dedicate himself to the clan with even more dedication and stuff.

So you want to have people who have dedicated years of their life into learning something enough to get a master's degree just so you can beat it out of them and tell them you've been the right one all along? I'm not quite sure I understand your reasoning.

[John Takeshi]

Nor shall you, until you attain your Master's, join my commune, and experience the enlightenment of the tiger mind. Are you a 10th Dan of Shao-lin Ninjitsu and Tai Shing Pek Kwar? I didn't think so. Now go get that Master's, boy.



"The praying mantis prays to the tiger of the spiritual, for the wind bends the bamboo with the enlightenment of the bear's shrugging shoulders."

[Daniel09]

That'll have to wait. I do plan on getting a master's, but first I need to finish high school and get into college. So maybe I'll get back to you in ten years.

In the mean-time, I'm sticking to learning snippets of kung fu every now and then.

[cjurakpt]

I have a Master's Degree, but have already transcended the spirtual dialectic encompassed by the mind of the tiger's essence; my Nature is boundless, and merely typing these words has sent a ripple through the very fabric of the space/time continuum

how fortunate that you have all been witness to this event!

[Wildwoo]

You will go too far toying with my Master and then you will understand what the true definition of destroy really means. Sifu has many students from government, military and law enforcement and we are all reading your words from California to Switzerland. If he even remotely suggests it we will track your IP and give him all of your vital stats. Lok was right! What a gaggle of internet sissies with way too much time on their hands LOL!!!!! You should really go ahead and practice your martial art instead of your keyboard hunt and peck, You're going to need it friend.

WWII



Our September kumite is coming up.

I'd like to extend an invitation for attendance to those from KFM who are locals. Everyone is welcome. There won't be an entrance fee, but there will be a seating fee ($25.00/hour). Like any high culture event, there will be no seating once the kumite is in progress. If anyone wishes to challenge a participant, he must be wearing regulation attire.

I'd also like to take this opportunity to invite Lokhopkuen. I wish to fight you in the main event. I do not take challenges lightly, or personally, so I can keep this professional. I want to destroy you.

You have challenged me, and offended me personally. There will be nothing "soft" about this, softy.

The kumite is on for Saturday the 29th.

Get ready. September 29th approaches.

[jdhowland]

Quote: "...is comprised of...," "...none of them are black."

Obviously, John, your degree is not in English.

[NJM]

You will go too far toying with my Master and then you will understand what the true definition of destroy really means. Sifu has many students from government, military and law enforcement and we are all reading your words from California to Switzerland. If he even remotely suggests it we will track your IP and give him all of your vital stats. Lok was right! What a gaggle of internet sissies with way too much time on their hands LOL!!!!! You should really go ahead and practice your martial art instead of your keyboard hunt and peck, You're going to need it friend.

WWII

Somehow, I don't think you were supposed to tell us this.

[Wildwoo]

Somehow, I don't think you were supposed to tell us this.

I was just playing LOL!;) I don't even know the guy,

[NJM]

I was just playing LOL!;) I don't even know the guy,
I figured as much. :P

[John Takeshi]

You will go too far toying with my Master and then you will understand what the true definition of destroy really means. Sifu has many students from government, military and law enforcement and we are all reading your words from California to Switzerland. If he even remotely suggests it we will track your IP and give him all of your vital stats. Lok was right! What a gaggle of internet sissies with way too much time on their hands LOL!!!!! You should really go ahead and practice your martial art instead of your keyboard hunt and peck, You're going to need it friend.

WWII

I have not heard a reply from him to my invitation to the kumite's main event. He has threatened me in at least 3 or 4 PM's, 2 at most, and so I offered him the chance to settle our score mano-y-mano, as they say in Honduras, and perhaps squash our beef, mate. If Lokhopkuen is indeed as well trained and deadly as he says he is, it will make for a good, albeit short match. The fans will be entertained, I'm sure. BTW, there will be paramedics on hand to attend to his injuries.

If you are a student of Lokhopkuen, please advise him to respond. RSVP's are required.

September 29th encroaches.

[Wildwoo]

I spoke to him and he said

"John Takeshi is a moron and should be made to eat his own nuts so that the genetic pool is not further contaminated."

Boy you never have to guess what is on his mind.

[John Takeshi]

Boy you never have to guess what is on his mind.

If you mean to say that he is constantly thinking of male genitalia and methods of inserting said members into an orifice, especially the mouth, I think you might be right.

Good luck in the future, Wildwoo.

John Takeshi,

10th Dan Tai Shing Pek Kwar of Chan Tai San lineage
10th Dan Shao-lin Ninjitsu

[Wildwoo]

You give Ninja f a gs a bad name..........................................

[Wildwoo]

I have not heard a reply from him to my invitation to the kumite's main event. He has threatened me in at least 3 or 4 PM's, 2 at most, and so I offered him the chance to settle our score mano-y-mano, as they say in Honduras, and perhaps squash our beef, mate. If Lokhopkuen is indeed as well trained and deadly as he says he is, it will make for a good, albeit short match. The fans will be entertained, I'm sure. BTW, there will be paramedics on hand to attend to his injuries.

If you are a student of Lokhopkuen, please advise him to respond. RSVP's are required.

September 29th encroaches.

Lokhopkuen just arrived back in country and while he was away made friends with Ninja Master Ashida Kim who informed him of your Pink Ninja Affiliations. Ashida Kim said you are now on the S-hit list for the unforgivable crime of revealing the sacred practice of Shaolin Pink Ninja Grab Ass techniques to a non-initiate. He told Lok not to bother to respond to your invitation because by September 23 your head and pink ninja headband will hang on a hook in his trophy room back on Mt. Kim Chi. He was also informed Master Lokhopkuen that you gave poor Judo Master Andy a rather nasty social disease during the Tiger Mind festival last December whom by the way later passed it on to your Mother while keeping bar at her Child Day care facility/ Brothel in Lubbock, Texas. Sadly I hear she passed it on to several hundred of her customers and a few children. No one is pressing charges because she is so good with the children and we know good help is so hard to find.

You know this is true Johnny boy so please save yourself the embarrassment of denying it or I will post the official intel report and you know what is in there buddy. You know you don't want people here to read that stuff no sir you do not. Lok mentioned to my Si-hing he is really sorry he got you in trouble but I just laughed because I know that the little marshmallow hearts of internet larpers such as yourself pump luke warm kool-aid and always sooner or later their heads and pink ninja headbands will end up on a hook in some trophy room back on Mt. Kim Chi. :D:eek:

We will pray for your Pink Ninja Soul Master Takeshi. By we I mean my friends filled with compassion. I myself will just laugh at your fate especially when hanging with your mother at this year's Tiger Mind festival where by the way Lokhopkuen will be the keynote speaker.

[Wildwoo]

If you mean to say that he is constantly thinking of male genitalia and methods of inserting said members into an orifice, especially the mouth, I think you might be right.

Good luck in the future, Wildwoo.

John Takeshi,

10th Dan Tai Shing Pek Kwar of Chan Tai San lineage
10th Dan Shao-lin Ninjitsu

No you posted out of context which you do often and no one with a Master's Degree does that. Do they John? The Official Intel Report states that you never finished elementary school you little wanna be you.:D:p

[John Takeshi]

You give Ninja f a gs a bad name..........................................

No, I give them a home, a purpose, and a retractible naginata. Bad names are earned. They can't be given.

Take Lokhopkuen, for instance. If I'm not mistaken, that means "pedophile" in mandarin.

[John Takeshi]

No you posted out of context which you do often and no one with a Master's Degree does that. Do they John? The Official Intel Report states that you never finished elementary school you little wanna be you.:D:p

It wasn't out of context. Obviously, your scansion, comprehension, and deconstructions skills are those of a toddler. I don't mean any offense. Toddlers do amazing things these days. Just look at "Are you smarter than a Fifth Grader?"

[Lokhopkuen]

One of my senior students told me about this and yes it is pretty funny however it does not help matters here or anywhere else. I will speak to you in person about this you little silver tongued devil. In the mean time please do me a favor, do not involve my name in this type of thing anymore. I'd like to thank you for this lesson because I can see from my poor example how I may have influenced you.

I humbly apologize.

I am not surprised at the time someone might take to construct and promote a linage that does not exist. Obviously for the sake of online entertainment as most people are probably pretty bored out there. Creative writing is an art form that encourages self expression I'd imagine.
I say go ninja!

Ninja is a fascinating subject isn't it? What a fantasy to cloak one's self in anonymity and smite down your enemies from the shadows. I once met and hung out with a real Ninja Master in Chiba, Japan a few years ago who told me Ninjitsu is still practiced today at the old castle in Tokyo as those are all that remains of the original practitioners of two clans. To this day quiet as it is kept they are the (unofficial) protection detail for the Emperor. The guy could block arrows, avoid and disarm a Samurai and drink tons of saki with no apparent effect. He had never heard of Frank Dux or the great secret asian "kumite".
Budokan came up in conversation but I understand that is different.

Back to now.

The person who calls himself John Takeshi is not a real person Woo and if the person behind the persona was really interested in crossing hands with me he already would have done so as I am quite easy to find.

I teach a public class and all he'd have to do is show up and ask for a match.

He has not and I suspect he will not, yet I my ego is hopeful.

Lokhopkuen is Gong Tong Wa (Canton Dialect) for Six Harmonies Fist something an "educated person" would be sure to know would it were they could see beyond the end of their retractable naginata.

I joined this little flame war with some playful sarcastic comments and it has ballooned proportionately.

Ninjitsu has no link to Shaolin regardless of what has been written here. This disinformation adds to the confusion related to martial art. Assassins throughout time have used techniques of stealth to kill especially when a target is surrounded in concentric rings of protection.

In war they are known as commando.

In civilian life these techniques are called murder and would never be used or taught by a practitioner of martial virtue.

Martial art is about harmonizing mind, body and spirit not about violence and undue influence over others. It is easy to forget this when we take our ego out for a spin...
I have placed mine in park.

Peace



Lokhopkuen just arrived back in country and while he was away made friends with Ninja Master Ashida Kim who informed him of your Pink Ninja Affiliations. Ashida Kim said you are now on the S-hit list for the unforgivable crime of revealing the sacred practice of Shaolin Pink Ninja Grab Ass techniques to a non-initiate. He told Lok not to bother to respond to your invitation because by September 23 your head and pink ninja headband will hang on a hook in his trophy room back on Mt. Kim Chi. He was also informed Master Lokhopkuen that you gave poor Judo Master Andy a rather nasty social disease during the Tiger Mind festival last December whom by the way later passed it on to your Mother while keeping bar at her Child Day care facility/ Brothel in Lubbock, Texas. Sadly I hear she passed it on to several hundred of her customers and a few children. No one is pressing charges because she is so good with the children and we know good help is so hard to find.

You know this is true Johnny boy so please save yourself the embarrassment of denying it or I will post the official intel report and you know what is in there buddy. You know you don't want people here to read that stuff no sir you do not. Lok mentioned to my Si-hing he is really sorry he got you in trouble but I just laughed because I know that the little marshmallow hearts of internet larpers such as yourself pump luke warm kool-aid and always sooner or later their heads and pink ninja headbands will end up on a hook in some trophy room back on Mt. Kim Chi. :D:eek:

We will pray for your Pink Ninja Soul Master Takeshi. By we I mean my friends filled with compassion. I myself will just laugh at your fate especially when hanging with your mother at this year's Tiger Mind festival where by the way Lokhopkuen will be the keynote speaker.

[John Takeshi]

Coward.

If you won't fight, I'll find someone else. If Coach Ross ducks, I guess I'll have to find real men.

I'm off to the Boys and Girls clubs of America.:p

September 29th is on my foot, which is headed straight up your.....

[John Takeshi]

I'm finished here. I quit. I'm not posting anymore.


You guys need to grow up.

I'll come back the day a superb Shao-lin poet challenges my prowess.

Until then, auf wierdersein.

[Wildwoo]

Ashida Kim said you are now on the S-hit list for the unforgivable crime of revealing the sacred practice of Shaolin Pink Ninja Grab Ass techniques to a non-initiate. He told Lok not to bother to respond to your invitation because by September 23 your head and pink ninja headband will hang on a hook in his trophy room back on Mt. Kim Chi. Your days are numbered pimky. LOL!!!

[Zhang Yong Chun]

He said he's a little east-northeast of there.

I'm beginning to get a little suspicious of him.

I asked him what mammalian Proprotein convertases and metalloendopeptidase were. He shrugged. I suggested that while serine proteinases are largely responsible for activating precursors of hormones, enzymes, growth and transcription factors, receptors, as well as envelope proteins of infectious viruses and bacteria, that ARTc plays a far more important role in the cytosol and at the cell surface.

He just smiled wanly and replied: "Yup."

Funny thing is, it's NRDc that plays a far more important role in the cytosol and at the cell surface. I made up ARTc.

I think that demonstrates how very cunning I am.

Plus, he has a tattoo of Little Nemo on his left ankle.

Maybe I'm jaded, or maybe my ninja senses are picking something up. Something fishy is afoot.


LOL! Best writer on this board...
But of course, we all know that the true fathers of Shaolin Ninja are the assassins of Sinanju.

[BruceSteveRoy]

Originally Posted by John Takeshi View Post
He said he's a little east-northeast of there.

I'm beginning to get a little suspicious of him.

I asked him what mammalian Proprotein convertases and metalloendopeptidase were. He shrugged. I suggested that while serine proteinases are largely responsible for activating precursors of hormones, enzymes, growth and transcription factors, receptors, as well as envelope proteins of infectious viruses and bacteria, that ARTc plays a far more important role in the cytosol and at the cell surface.

He just smiled wanly and replied: "Yup."

Funny thing is, it's NRDc that plays a far more important role in the cytosol and at the cell surface. I made up ARTc.

I think that demonstrates how very cunning I am.

Plus, he has a tattoo of Little Nemo on his left ankle.

Maybe I'm jaded, or maybe my ninja senses are picking something up. Something fishy is afoot.

that is a long way to go for that joke. but thank you for that. it was brilliant.

[Woof]

My original post asked you how many you taught. I never said any of what you are insinuating. You're just in a rough neighborhood. It's a Blood Gang Territory. That doesn't mean that there aren't other races present in Crenshaw. However, it's not a race issue. It's a numbers game when business comes into play. Let me give you an example. My family owns a business in North Hollywood. The dominant population is ****sexual couples (male and female). His most dominant customer population is ****sexual couples. Does that mean he doesn't have other people come in? No. It just means that is his dominant customer cliental. I am in Graduate school now, so I don't have a Master's degree yet. I will though in 2 years. Presuming you're still there, I'll come by. I hope a degree from USC Medical School will be enough for your qualifications.

Do you consider Leimert Park a gang infested, rough neighborhood?

[Seppukku]

So I was looking at websites today, because I faked sick and got off of work at LazerQuest, and I typed in www.shaolinninjitsu.com, because I wanted to see if there was such a thing. I love ninjitsu, and I love shaolin, and I thought that if there was such a thing I would fall down dead, come back to life as a lama, and I would graze upon the grasses of complete and unfettered thralldom. So I typed it in.

Boy, was I in for a shock. It had to be like the coolest thing I've ever seen! There were ninjas who were Shaolin! They dressed like ninjas, only they wore orange, and as they chopped off heads, they shouted: "Budda Bless you! But Godd@mn you!" And then they ripped out their intestines on their mothers, just so they could see their guts.

So I clicked on the ticker at the bottom, because I wanted to support their cause. And like, then the screen goes completely black, and this voice starts talking to me: "Listen......listen.....listen....." So I turn up the speakers, and then outside my room I hear this guy in the hallway shout: "Hey Ben! Bless you! Ghezundetite!" And then Ben shouts back: "Unhand me, Jew!" I guess, because some Jewish guy grabbed him (he's a racist, by the way). I thought, No WAY! IT COULDNT BE A COINCIDENCE! Hey Ben! Bless you! sounds like Buddah Bless you! And Unhand me Jew! sounds just like God**** you!

So I'm pretty on edge, right? And then I come here to tell you guys about it like a minute later, and I have a PM in my mailbox. Freaky, right?

It went like this:


Congratulations, you have earned the chance to die...or live....depending on how you reply to this most private of massages.

You have accessed a webpage that does not exist for the common man, and clicked the ticker that cannot be seen by common eyes.

Perhaps you are the one chosen and foretold by the Prophecy of the layman ninja.

Normally I require a Master's Degree for entry into my school to train as a true Ninja Scholar.

I am extending you the opportunity to train with me as my apprentice herbal concoctioner and ninja extroiardinair.....extroar.....ninja grandmaster sifu, and you don't need a Master's. This is a once in a lifetime offer. Your lifetime, that is. Nobody has ever trained with me without a MAster's.

Reply, if you dare.

What should I do? Do you guys know this guy? Is he legit? Is the systen known as Shaolin Ninjitusu for real Shaolin, and real ninjitsu?

[NJM]

Gtfo.

.

[Seppukku]

I flew out last week, and took the orders and the tonsure. I think this was a wise decision.

[Seppukku]

Yesterday Sensei Hoyle baked a magnificent German Chocolate cake that literally was so good we put it on display in the window of the Crenshaw Dance Studio. You can see it if you walk by, and we'll let you take a bite, supposing that you have a MAster's Degree certificate on hand.

[Wildwoo]

Yesterday Sensei Hoyle baked a magnificent German Chocolate cake that literally was so good we put it on display in the window of the Crenshaw Dance Studio. You can see it if you walk by, and we'll let you take a bite, supposing that you have a MAster's Degree certificate on hand.

No no no no!!!

Ur B S ing. Place is closed and John Takeshi's head rests on a spike in Ashida Kim's Library just above the ninja cookbook section back On Mount Kim Chi next to his pink shaolin ninja headband. My Sifu seen wit his own two eyes he did he did.

A little known fact is that when they forced John's head down for the swing of the ax he involuntarily yet musically trumpeted a liquadic gaseous crepitation form his back door in E sharp minor completely soiling his purple sequined ninja g-string as well as his pink ninja stretch work out pants. Sadly this caused a rather gross distortion of the Crenshaw Yoga and Dance logo that was silk screened across his narrow ninja bootocks but such is the price one pays for teaching the secret sacred art of shaolin ninja grab ass to a non-initiate.

RIP Johnny:D

[Seppukku]

That was funny, Wildwoo.

Oh, by the way, does "Wildwoo" mean "I should shut the hell up because I obviously have no idea what I'm talking about, because I study under a coward who would not face me at our September Kumite?"

I'm not saying that it does, that's just what I've heard, and what I firmly believe beyond all shadow of a doubt.

You may apologize to me in a PM. I think this demonstrates how discreet I can be.

[Wildwoo]

That was funny, Wildwoo.

Oh, by the way, does "Wildwoo" mean "I should shut the hell up because I obviously have no idea what I'm talking about, because I study under a coward who would not face me at our September Kumite?"

I'm not saying that it does, that's just what I've heard, and what I firmly believe beyond all shadow of a doubt.

You may apologize to me in a PM. I think this demonstrates how discreet I can be.

Wildwoo? Family name is Wu and I'm a wild Muther F**ker.
I think this demonstrates how hedonistic I am.;)

[Seppukku]

I noticed that you did not apologize in a PM.

I will now require it on the main forum.

Please state why you are so sorry, as a person, or as an individual. Please state why your Master is so sorry, as a person, or as an individual.

Do not send me a PM, unless you receive my permission, which I will send you in the form of a PM.

I think this demonstrates how iron-hearted I am.

[Shaolinlueb]

Shaolin Ninjitsu Is Very Real!! I Am The Current Lineage Holder Of The System! I Only Teach It To Disciples Who Can Pay The High Price Of $500usd An Hour! I Can Not Let My Mysterious Art Go To JUST Anyone!


Beware!

[Wildwoo]

I noticed that you did not apologize in a PM.

I will now require it on the main forum.

Please state why you are so sorry, as a person, or as an individual. Please state why your Master is so sorry, as a person, or as an individual.

Do not send me a PM, unless you receive my permission, which I will send you in the form of a PM.

I think this demonstrates how iron-hearted I am.

Now you have done it.:mad:

You have offended my fam-o-wee,

YOU HAVE OFFENDED THE SHAOLIN TEMPLE

You have offended my ninjaina!

I hear-by officially invite you to the John Tekeshi Memorial Shaolin Ninjitsu big fluffy pillow fight/ kumite and Chili Cook off to be held this September at a super secret location very close to Crenshaw yoga and dance. Ask for Rose and don't mention German Chocolate cake as she is a fat girl.

I think this demonstrates how considerate I am....

As you can see you are in trouble now buster.

I think this demonstrates how riled up I am!

As for calling my teacher names, I think you should go and find him and say it to his face.
He has an incredible sense of humor and he is a real people person.

[Lokhopkuen]

That was funny, Wildwoo.

Oh, by the way, does "Wildwoo" mean "I should shut the hell up because I obviously have no idea what I'm talking about, because I study under a coward who would not face me at our September Kumite?"

I'm not saying that it does, that's just what I've heard, and what I firmly believe beyond all shadow of a doubt.

You may apologize to me in a PM. I think this demonstrates how discreet I can be.

Had to see it for myself. Another JT clone troll LOL!

Coward? :p


Imaginary kumite?


You wouldn't face me with an army of your imaginary ninja friends at your side.

Anyway I retired my ninja smacker.


Smack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninjaSmack a ninja.

Wu don't play with him, you'll get dirty.

[SaintSage]

Wu don't play with him, you'll get dirty.

But showing how hedonistic he is...he might like that. ;):D

[Seppukku]

Shaolin Ninjitsu Is Very Real!! I Am The Current Lineage Holder Of The System! I Only Teach It To Disciples Who Can Pay The High Price Of $500usd An Hour! I Can Not Let My Mysterious Art Go To JUST Anyone!


Beware!

With grammar like that, I assume you don't have a Master's Degree, so I'll just ignore you. Plus, you aren't me, unless I'm a used tampon that fell into a pile of dog flop, which was then run over by a bus, which then hit a homeless guy and splattered his entrails under the tires of the bus, which then skidded out, flipped over sideways, and crashed into a raw sewage tanker, thereby soiling Route 66 from Chicago to LA, as if it weren't dirty enough.

I think that demonstrates how much I am myself.

[mkriii]

What a stupid reply. Why are you concerned about how many african americans he trains? An gang territory? I take if your from you that everyone who lives there are black ... or that the area is only for gangs an owned by gangs... or that you have a single uneducated mind that automatically assumes all black people are in gangs... which stupid choice is it?

Why is that a stupid reply? Crenshaw is mostly a black area (notice I did not say African-American, I do not conform to political correctness). His reply is like saying you teach in Chinatown and someone asking how many of your students are Chinese. This is not a big deal to me. As for the gang thing, it is in a gang infested area so that comment wasn't stupid either. He did not say a thing about all black people are in gangs, thats your assumption apparently because you mentioned it first. Why are you so fast to jump on NJM? Are you a person of black color? Are you trying to play the race card? Thats what it sounds like to me. As you can see I do not conform to political correctness and I speak whats on my mind weather it offends or not. Thats the problem with this country today. Society as a whole is worried about offending others and/or disciplining and punishing our youth. Being to politically correct has weakened our society. Thats my soap box for the day (maybe).

[Seppukku]

Why is that a stupid reply? Crenshaw is mostly a (expletive deleted) area (notice I did not say African-American, I am a redneck ******* who eats beef jerky and has red hair). His reply is like saying you teach in Chinatown and someone asking how many of your students are Rice-heads. This is not a big deal to me. As for the gang thing, it is in a gang infested area so that comment wasn't stupid either, and I should know, because I'm a Crip. He did not say a thing about all black people are in gangs, thats your assumption apparently because you mentioned it first. Why are you so fast to jump on NJM, like I do on some barbecue ribs? Are you a person of black color, even though black is a shade and not a color? What I mean is: do you have lots of melanin in your skin, because if you do, I'll hate you too! Are you trying to play the race card? You can't. I played it last night in D&D. Thats what it sounds like to me. As you can see I do not conform to political correctness, only universal wrongness, and I speak whats on my mind weather it offends or not, despite the fact I don't really have a mind and sometimes confuse the word "weather" with "whether" when I really mean to use the ladder, or "latter" as you politically correct grammarians would use (fie on you!), just a dark space between my ears filled with pornography and urges to bestiality. Thats the problem with this country today. Society as a whole is worried about offending others and/or disciplining and punishing our youth, whereas we should be lauding them for their bigotry and their ability to offend. By the way, me being a white redneck ******* has nothing to do with my opinions. I'm speaking the truth, whether you like it or not, even though it's not the truth, and reflects the particular inbred clan I belong to up in the Catskills. Being to politically correct has weakened our society. We were much stronger when the Klan took care of things, and when Blacks had no rights. Thats my soap box for the day (maybe).

I bet you didn't think anybody saw the post before you parsed it into your "politically correct" posting, did you?

BTW, you need to take a multicultural class or two, perhaps on your way to a Master's Degree?

[mkriii]

Seppuku....Actually I have taken a few multi-cultural classes seeing my Masters Degree is in Sociology. I have taken many classes on race, ethnicity, and gender. I graduated from Morehead University in Morehead Kentucky in 1999. Yes there is a school called Morehead. As for the red neck wise crack I am far from that. I am educated and have a job that pays in the six digits. I own my own home (not a double wide trailer like you might) and I own my own car (not a pick up truck like your vehicle).

[mkriii]

Seppuku..... I see you resort to changing peoples words to try and make them look bad. Typical of someone like you. You must be a liberal democrat huh? We'll just call you Slick Willie. Liberalism is a mental disorder.

[mkriii]

Whats wrong Seppuku, nothing else to say? Come on, you can think of something intellegent to say can't you? Did you think that I didn't have a college degree? Did you think that I was collecting well fare or something. Surprised you huh? Not all Kentuckians are illiterate. Only some......lol. I'll debate you on anyhting you want Seppuku and make you look foolish. Bring it on B!tch.

[Shaolinlueb]

With grammar like that, I assume you don't have a Master's Degree, so I'll just ignore you. Plus, you aren't me, unless I'm a used tampon that fell into a pile of dog flop, which was then run over by a bus, which then hit a homeless guy and splattered his entrails under the tires of the bus, which then skidded out, flipped over sideways, and crashed into a raw sewage tanker, thereby soiling Route 66 from Chicago to LA, as if it weren't dirty enough.

I think that demonstrates how much I am myself.


RUBBISH!!! I am the MASTER!

wait....

who are you?

[Seppukku]

Whats wrong Seppuku, nothing else to say? Come on, you can think of something intellegent to say can't you? Did you think that I didn't have a college degree? Did you think that I was collecting well fare or something. Surprised you huh? Not all Kentuckians are illiterate. Only some......lol. I'll debate you on anyhting you want Seppuku and make you look foolish. Bring it on B!tch.

So, I was having a conversation with Sensei Hoyle like two days ago, and we were just finished running the gauntlet, having passed the razorwire thermoban successfully three times straight, when he started some smalltalk, saying how acute decompensated heart failure poses a complex clinical challenge for the health care community. He said that evolving concepts of the pathophysiology and lack of consensus on appropriate outcome measures for drug approval underlie some of the current controversies about nesiritide. "I," he continued, "believe the major controversies from the viewpoint that nesiritide should continue to be used judiciously by following its package insert recommendations and the Heart Failure Society of America's 2006 Comprehensive Heart Failure Practice Guidelines."

I said: "Whatever....."

He was like, "what's that supposed to mean?"


I said: "Continue, finish your argument, and I'll rebut."

"Oh no you don't, Socrates," he said to me. "I'm not falling for that tripe. If you're so smart, then tell me about the situation, thenI'll reply."

"Whatever, Thrasymachus," says I. "I already know what you're going to say, and I also know that that Nesiritide (Natrecor; Scios Inc., Sunnyvale, CA) is the only agent to demonstrate, in randomized controlled trials, symptomatic and hemodynamic improvement over standard care in patients with acute decompensated heart failure (ADHF). That despite these positive findings, two meta-analyses, published in 2005, have generated debate around the safety of nesiritide. These analyses used a selective sampling design from nesiritide clinical trial data available on the United States Food and Drug Administration's (FDA) Web site. Two safety concerns with nesiritide administration were raised: the first was a possible increased risk of worsening renal function demonstrated by elevations in serum creatinine concentration, and the second concern was a possible increased rate of 30-day posttreatment mortality. Extensive media coverage of these data may have led to a reduction in nesiritide use, with a concomitant increase in positive inotrope use in those patients for whom a vasodilator was indicated."

HE said: "Yeah, that was pretty much it."

I said: "I don't buy it. See, when the creatinine concentration reaches a point of controlled equilibrium in the sheupeneur gland of the left cortical synapsis, the nesiritide decreases in areas where a reverse hydrocortical inducer was used to facilitate the creatinine deconstruction."

He was pretty much speechless after that. So, mrkiii, what do you have to say to that?

[Seppukku]

By the way, my friend, it's "welfare", unless you're describing the "wellness" of your "fare". Well, fare thee well, chump.

[mkriii]

And here I thought that creatine was stored in the liver not the sheupeneur gland. It never ceases to amaze me........I learn something new everyday. As to the rest of what you stated in your post I would have to agree with you 100%.

My question back to you is whats your oppinion on Derkhiem's research on suicide in regards to religion (Catholics vs. Protestants)? Do you agree or disagree with his findings? Also, what about his findings on suicide in regards to social integration?
In your opinion who is the better social scientist and why, Max Weber or Emile Durkhiem?

[Seppukku]

And here I thought that creatine was stored in the liver not the sheupeneur gland. It never ceases to amaze me........I learn something new everyday. As to the rest of what you stated in your post I would have to agree with you 100%.

My question back to you is whats your oppinion on Derkhiem's research on suicide in regards to religion (Catholics vs. Protestants)? Do you agree or disagree with his findings? Also, what about his findings on suicide in regards to social integration?
In your opinion who is the best social scientist and why, Max Weber or Emile Durkhiem?

Personally, I find Derkhiem's theories completely inelegant, and I don't even touch Max Weber with a ten foot pole because of his fiscal politics. I much prefer the clever musings of a Wittgenstein. My friend once asked me: "hey, do you like Max Weber, or do you prefer someone like Popper?" I said: "Really, I only read sophisticated works by open-minded, existential French authors. I think that demonstrates how clever I am."

[mkriii]

I don't really like French authors. I personally have been to France (Paris in particular) and found the people to be quite rude. Not to mention smelly. I understand that it's acceptable there not to use deoderant but then again we are talking about the spinless French people. The art work is really beautiful. The Louvre was extrodanary.

[Seppukku]

And here I thought that creatine was stored in the liver not the sheupeneur gland. It never ceases to amaze me........I learn something new everyday. As to the rest of what you stated in your post I would have to agree with you 100%.

Actually, the Sheupeneur gland is the liver. Or at least that's what the Germans called it circa 1972, when Meister Wilhelm Goetz was studying its cancer resistance.

I'd have expected you to know that, being as erudite as you are.

[Seppukku]

I don't really like French authors. I personally have been to France (Paris in particular) and found the people to be quite rude. Not to mention smelly. I understand that it's acceptable there not to use deoderant but then again we are talking about the spinless French people. The art work is really beautiful. The Louvre was extrodanary.

I don't understand, are you trying to insinuate that the French people are disembodied and unaffected by the Earth's spin? That's an intriguing argument you've raised. I'll have to formulate a counterargument. It might take a few days. I shall submit my rebuttal then......By Jove! I think I've got it. Here's the glaring flaw in your articulate theory:

Gravity.

As for the Louvre being Extrodanary, what do the Danes have to do with it? And why would a French museum need to be described as something "outside Danish influence"? Of course it is. It's French.


Okay, by my tally, you're my b1tch right now by a score of 3:1.

Fare thee well, mrkiii.

[cjurakpt]

when the creatinine concentration reaches a point of controlled equilibrium in the sheupeneur gland of the left cortical synapsis, the nesiritide decreases in areas where a reverse hydrocortical inducer was used to facilitate the creatinine deconstruction."

well, in regards to deconstruction, I was consulting with Mssrs. Foucault and Derrida the other night (quite a feat, considering both have been personally deconstructed for quite some time now), and the agreement twixt us all was unequivocal: Durkheim was a weenie, Weber had his head so far up his up his asz that he could examine his own thymus from below, and Levi-Strauss just liked running around the tropics ("triste", indeed!) with naked pre-pubescent native girls;

as for creatinine, Jacques, Michel and I all feel that considering the substance not as a neuropeptide per se, but rather as a unique substrate of "tEXT", the essential issue is then not one of re-uptake inhibition, but rather of the logos reflecting back upon itself, thus generating a state of equilibrium based on it's own self-negating principles; by now, your spinal columns have collapsed and your dural membranes split wide due to the impact of this reality, and you are doubtless writhing in a pool of your own cerebral spinal fluid - how sad, how...qu'esque c'est le mot juste?...post-structural!

[Seppukku]

You are obviously an African-American thats trying to show that he has a little bit of education but in reality has none. I was just going along with your B.S. conversation to amuse you. Your attack on NJM's comments in earlier posts shows that you are an idiot. There is a saying........ You can take the ******* out of the ghetto but you can't take the ghetto out of the ********.

The sad thing is, I didn't edit any of this PM.:( I can only speculate as to the deleted word, but either way, mrkiii just lost all of his street cred--unless of course you're talking about his Klan street cred. But I figure that's more of lawn cred than anything.

[mkriii]

Seppukku....shut your pie hole.

[mkriii]

http://www.freewebs.com/shaolinninjitsu/

[Seppukku]

Seppukku....shut your pie hole.

So, do you think all black people eat pies? What if I don't like pies? As a matter of fact, I don't. I don't even like pot pies. I even killed a magpie once, because I didn't like the way he looked at me.

There's only one kind of pie I like.

Thigh pie.

[mkriii]

Seppuku......You really are paranoid that people are against you because you are black aren't you? The term "shut your pie hole" has nothing to do with your race you idiot. And it has nothing to do with eating pie.

[TrollTerminator]

Seppuku......You really are paranoid that people are against you because you are black aren't you? The term "shut your pie hole" has nothing to do with your race you idiot. And it has nothing to do with eating pie. Now if I had said shut your watermelon hole then that would be racist but I didn't say that or anything racist.

Originally Posted by mkriii
You are obviously an African-American thats trying to show that he has a little bit of education but in reality has none. I was just going along with your B.S. conversation to amuse you. Your attack on NJM's comments in earlier posts shows that you are an idiot. There is a saying........ You can take the ******* out of the ghetto but you can't take the ghetto out of the ********.

Sounds pretty racist to me.
TT

[Lokhopkuen]

http://www.freewebs.com/shaolinninjitsu/

Brilliant!;)

[Nebuchadnezzar]

If you're new to the world of Kung Fu and have a questions like: "Is the systen known as Shaolin Ninjitsu real shaolin kung fu???"

I have answers.

Yes, it is for real. It may be the only thing that is real. If you have a Master's Degree from an accredited university, I can enlighten you and relieve you of your burdens while transforming you into a deadly weapon. Unlike sport fighting arts that have been modified, and codified, and feminized to the point of absurdity, or even aestheticized to hide the true killing potential of the really cool moves in the forms (as is prevalent both in so-called traditional shaolin martial arts and wushu), shao-lin ninjitsu preserves shao-lin in all of its martial glory, completely ****genized and as applicable today as it was in yesteryear.

Shaolin ninjitsu was the stealth art practiced by the Ten Tigers of Canton, used for sneaking and reconnaisance in their protection of the province, modified from traditional japanese kata using Hung Gar. You will find a parallel for this transformation in the evolution of Okinawan Karate from Shaolin Crane, only in reverse.

Although many discredit Shao-lin Ninjitsu because of the apparent contradiction in cultures it presents, and are abhorred to learn that the beloved Fei Hung learned the deadly assassin's art, Shao-lin Ninjitsu is truly an art of peace. When involved in conflict, if you kill the aggressor, there is no more conflict, and peace resumes.

I am here at your disposal for any questions concerning my art. You can also speak with me at my Shao-lin Ninjitsu commune, assuming of course you bring proof of your Master's Degree receipt from an accredited university. We're located behind Crenshaw Yoga and Dance. You must enter the CYAD and ask to speak with Rose. When she asks you why you wish to learn Yoga and Dance, you must respond by saying that you seek the mind of the tiger spiritual, and she will usher you to my facility, which is tucked away behind the dance studio.

Good luck with your studies, everyone, and peace.

Grandmaster Sensei John Takeshi
8th Dan Shao-lin Ninjitsu, 8th Dan Tai Shing Pek Kwar

Student of Grandmaster Sensei Takeshi Ukeno
10th Dan Shao-lin Ninjitsu, 10th Dan Tai Shing Pek Kwar (of Chan Tai San lineage)

You're Funny!!!!!

[bodhitree]

http://www.freewebs.com/shaolinninjitsu/


awesome

As for the rest of the bs, how did racism get dragged into a shaolin ninjitsu discussion, unless it's racism against Koreans?

[shadowlin]

this post is some funny ****e, even if racist.
I love the attachment of the dead sea scrolls as proof of shaolin ninjitsu.
This just goes to show how much more unreliable the internet is for research than it should be.

[CoolHead]

I salute you for opening so boldly. I visited your website- I found it very interesting. This exchange opened red hot as you noticed. You get deep enough
into the ninja subject you discover it is very old and comes from many places: tell us more about what makes your system unique; in particular, does your bare handed combat derive from the Vagabond form or is it more Old Shaolin like? Someone practicing an unorthodox philosophy openly on top of practicing a lethal system like Monkey is bound to upset people. Bravo, John.

[Nebuchadnezzar]

I salute you for opening so boldly. I visited your website- I found it very interesting. This exchange opened red hot as you noticed. You get deep enough
into the ninja subject you discover it is very old and comes from many places: tell us more about what makes your system unique; in particular, does your bare handed combat derive from the Vagabond form or is it more Old Shaolin like? Someone practicing an unorthodox philosophy openly on top of practicing a lethal system like Monkey is bound to upset people. Bravo, John.

You're Funny Too!!!!!