i just got in to a fight...and lost!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Oso]

she wanted to watch the Detroit vs. Orlando game and I wanted to watch the WEC


:(

[lkfmdc]

If only you had practiced your forms more! :D

[Scott R. Brown]

These things happen!;)

[lkfmdc]

If he had only trained Shaolin Do he woud have been "trained to kill, PERIOD" (r)

[monji112000]

she wanted to watch the Detroit vs. Orlando game and I wanted to watch the WEC


:(

buy two TVs...

[Oso]

that's ok...the make up sex was pretty good ;)

[Oso]

and I think I came up with a form specifically for remote control defense...but it leads to the make up sex so monks won't be able to perform it!

[lkfmdc]

that's ok...the make up sex was pretty good ;)

That's what tattooed monk said in RE to Kwaichang :eek:

[rogue]

that's ok...the make up sex was pretty good ;)

Which hand did you use and did she notice the wet spot?

[Oso]

lkfmdc: why the SD references?


:p @ rogue

[TaichiMantis]

It's ok. I rule the remote in our family because of my superior grappling skills:cool:

[kwaichang]

SD references because I called him on his fight record which is non existant because he TRAINS champions. Too busy I guess. Yes I do Sd and I can fight too it puts a kink in lk's little story. KC:)

[Judge Pen]

I lose fights all the time. I can convince a jury to find in favor of my client, but I can't convince my wife that the new speakers are really necessary to the well being of our family. I mean, come on.....

[BruceSteveRoy]

yeah i lost a fight trying to convinve my wife that guitar hero is on the grocery list. she said something about needing vegetables and i said guitar hero would be like vegetables for the soul. i lost that fight.

but oso next time you end up in this situation turn on what you want to watch and use your kung fu grip to crush the remote into dust and then turn to her and say "what now?" if she pauses for even a second raise your hands in the air and say "woohoo, i win! one to nothin'"

[Judge Pen]

yeah i lost a fight trying to convinve my wife that guitar hero is on the grocery list. she said something about needing vegetables and i said guitar hero would be like vegetables for the soul. i lost that fight.

but oso next time you end up in this situation turn on what you want to watch and use your kung fu grip to crush the remote into dust and then turn to her and say "what now?" if she pauses for even a second raise your hands in the air and say "woohoo, i win! one to nothin'"

I remember a tale about the Spartan women who got tired of the war their men were waging all of the time. They just cut them off and soon the men were crying like babies! There's a lesson to be learned from that....

[sean_stonehart]

I lose fights all the time. I can convince a jury to find in favor of my client, but I can't convince my wife that the new speakers are really necessary to the well being of our family. I mean, come on.....

Tell her they're necessary so that Autumn's hearing won't be strained trying to watch the Wiggles & whatnot & go out early.

Try that route... or maybe not. :eek:

[yu shan]

You got me on this one Oso, coming across this thread about you getting into a fight and losing, my initial thought was, must have been one bad mofo. But got a good laugh after seeing what you lost to. And a good one there Rogue.

[lkfmdc]

SD references because I called him on his fight record which is non existant because he TRAINS champions. Too busy I guess. Yes I do Sd and I can fight too it puts a kink in lk's little story. KC:)

Oh, you should all read the other thread, because it is a laugh riot :rolleyes:

kwaichang in less than 2 pages made claims, tried to squirm out of giving out names and details, got called on his lies, backtracked, changed his story and admitted the only three matches he ever had he lost all three.

Now, the losses aren't so bad, I've won and lost and I wasn't more than a "b level amateur" but when your sig line says "trained to kill" :rolleyes:

[rogue]

You got me on this one Oso, coming across this thread about you getting into a fight and losing, my initial thought was, must have been one bad mofo. But got a good laugh after seeing what you lost to. And a good one there Rogue.

I just have a different idea of what make up sex is if I don't win. :D

[Lama Pai Sifu]

Now, the losses aren't so bad, I've won and lost and I wasn't more than a "b level amateur" but when your sig line says "trained to kill" :rolleyes:

Ah..but he didn't say "WHAT" he is trained to kill! See? He has you there Ross!

He might be claiming proficiency in killing insects, rodents, small mammals or even marsupials....see, YOU don't know!

Just look here! (http://www.filterwiz.com/prod/pest-conrol-list.gif)

Although the termite looks too cute to kill...

[lkfmdc]

Ah..but he didn't say "WHAT" he is trained to kill! See? He has you there Ross!

He might be claiming proficiency in killing insects, rodents, small mammals or even marsupials....



oh my G'd, no!

NOT THE PANDAS!

:D

[yu shan]

Hell Rogue, seeing how long I`ve been married, I do whatever it takes to avoid the make up sex! ;)

[rogue]

I hear you. The problem with make up sex is that we men always have to start by saying, "Yes honey, you were right and I was wrong", no matter what. Everyman that is except lkfmdc who is never wrong. :D

[Lama Pai Sifu]

oh my G'd, no!

NOT THE PANDAS!

:D

Are you suggesting that Pandas are marsupials?

My good man, Pandas are in the family Procyonidae, not Ursidae. They are closer to raccoons than marsupials.

Good thing you took up Kung-Fu as a career and not biology. :P

[rogue]

So Dave is not infallible!:eek:

[Lama Pai Sifu]

So Dave is not infallible!:eek:

Bah! Dave knows nothing of Biology!

[lkfmdc]

Are you suggesting that Pandas are marsupials?



Are you suggesting that coconuts migrate? :D

I have long been under the (apparently incorrect) impression that Pandas are marsupials....

this news has devastated me :mad:

[Mook Jong]

So to you panda=fat cousin of a kangaroo?

[sanjuro_ronin]

So to you panda=fat cousin of a kangaroo?

I believe that the correct term is "slightly rotund" cousin of kangaroo.

[rogue]

Bah! Dave knows nothing of Biology!

Could explain his failures with make up sex.:D

[lkfmdc]

So to you panda=fat cousin of a kangaroo?

Beware the wrath of a panda! (http://us.movies1.yimg.com/movies.yahoo.com/images/hv/photo/movie_pix/dreamworks_skg/kung_fu_panda/jack_black/kungfu.jpg)

[Oso]

I lose fights all the time. I can convince a jury to find in favor of my client, but I can't convince my wife that the new speakers are really necessary to the well being of our family. I mean, come on.....

usually, we're in agreement on stuff like that...i just don't give a **** about basketball


but oso next time you end up in this situation turn on what you want to watch and use your kung fu grip to crush the remote into dust and then turn to her and say "what now?" if she pauses for even a second raise your hands in the air and say "woohoo, i win! one to nothin'"

usually, I do it one better: there are no less than 5 remotes on the coffee table. Only two of them really work but she doesn't know that. ;)
If I'm feeling really nasty, I dump the box of old remotes (don't tell me you actually throw the old ones away!?!?!?!?) on the table too just to watch the confused look on her face :D



You got me on this one Oso, coming across this thread about you getting into a fight and losing, my initial thought was, must have been one bad mofo. But got a good laugh after seeing what you lost to.

thanks for the vote of confidence. but, these days, I'm just gonna shoot someone instead of try to fight them...too old, to sore and just don't care enough to prove anything ;)

but, yea, it's play off season and she's the one who decided to get cable again so she could watch the play off's


kwaichang, lkfmdc, lama pai:

how's about you keep your stupid bickering to threads you've already dedicated to the inanity of the argument? everyone already knows your combined relative opinions and i'm sure those that care are paying the strictest attention. :) m'kay? thanks! :D

[TenTigers]

Hey man, it's all about compromise.
My OL wanted to carpet the livingroom,
I wanted this sweet Remington 700 sniper rifle with McMillan stock, leopold variaxIII scope and Harris bipod. One minute of angle right out of the box-meaning 1/4"drop at 100 yds.
So we compromised.
We carpeted the livingroom.
Another time, my OL wanted a new wall unit(to put all her fukin hummels, or some sh1t)
I had my eye on this really sweet Kimbar 1911 .45 "shorty"with trijicon sights and built in laser-maybe a pair of matched guns so I can be like Chow Yun-Fat.
So we compromised.
The wall unit looks really nice with the new carpet.

"Son, there are two secrets to understandin' women.
-and nobody knows either of'em!"

[Lama Pai Sifu]

kwaichang, lkfmdc, lama pai:

how's about you keep your stupid bickering to threads you've already dedicated to the inanity of the argument? everyone already knows your combined relative opinions and i'm sure those that care are paying the strictest attention. :) m'kay? thanks! :D

That was great. Thank you for that. I came back 10 minutes later and read it again....it was still funny. You are the man! Freakin' awesome post, I love it!

[TenTigers]

I have had so much make-up sex,
that with my left hand, I can't unzip my fly,
but with my right hand, I can crush a Volkswagon.

[Becca]

If only you had practiced your forms more! :D
If only you had a second t.v.......

[Chosen-frozen]

Hey man, it's all about compromise.
My OL wanted to carpet the livingroom,
I wanted this sweet Remington 700 sniper rifle with McMillan stock, leopold variaxIII scope and Harris bipod. One minute of angle right out of the box-meaning 1/4"drop at 100 yds.
So we compromised.
We carpeted the livingroom.
Another time, my OL wanted a new wall unit(to put all her fukin hummels, or some sh1t)
I had my eye on this really sweet Kimbar 1911 .45 "shorty"with trijicon sights and built in laser-maybe a pair of matched guns so I can be like Chow Yun-Fat.
So we compromised.
The wall unit looks really nice with the new carpet.

"Son, there are two secrets to understandin' women.
-and nobody knows either of'em!"


Reminds me of a joke.
Guy wakes up in the hospital. The docter tells him "I know you don`t remember,but you were in a bad car accident.It looks like you`re going to be fine though. The bad news is your p enis was cut off. Now don`t panic! We found it and we can replace it as good as new.

It`ll cost about a thousand dollars an inch, but the good news is we can make as big as you want. And there`s gonna be at least $12,000 left from your insurance settlement so we have plenty to work with. But You should talk it over with your wife before you decide how big you want it. If you were big before she might feel deprived if you came back home with less. On the other hand if you were just average before and came home like a porn star she might feel uncomfortable. Take your time and decide together."

2 days later the doctor comes back and looksi in on the poor guy, who`s looking very depressed. "So did you and your wife talk things over?"

"Yeah," the guy says "We`re getting a new kitchen."

[kwaichang]

OSO better wipe your nose and get the brown off it, I was just answering your Question from earlier. Lk is such a joke I wont respond to the boy any more he takes what you say and twists it into his own lie KC

[Oso]

Hey man, it's all about compromise.
My OL wanted to carpet the livingroom,
I wanted this sweet Remington 700 sniper rifle with McMillan stock, leopold variaxIII scope and Harris bipod. One minute of angle right out of the box-meaning 1/4"drop at 100 yds.
So we compromised.
We carpeted the livingroom.
Another time, my OL wanted a new wall unit(to put all her fukin hummels, or some sh1t)
I had my eye on this really sweet Kimbar 1911 .45 "shorty"with trijicon sights and built in laser-maybe a pair of matched guns so I can be like Chow Yun-Fat.
So we compromised.
The wall unit looks really nice with the new carpet.

"Son, there are two secrets to understandin' women.
-and nobody knows either of'em!"

LMAO!!!!! who's the quote from?

[Oso]

That was great. Thank you for that. I came back 10 minutes later and read it again....it was still funny. You are the man! Freakin' awesome post, I love it!

great, glad you enjoyed it. :)

[Oso]

OSO better wipe your nose and get the brown off it, I was just answering your Question from earlier. Lk is such a joke I wont respond to the boy any more he takes what you say and twists it into his own lie KC

brown nosing???? wtf are you talking about?

yea, you answered the question, thanks. my statement still stands though.

[Lama Pai Sifu]

great, glad you enjoyed it. :)

Yes, yes, OMG! It was very clever...

You are totally awesome, and funny. I can't be the only one who feels this way, I mean seriously...do you ever go back to your posts and re-read them after you write them? They are hilairious...

...and the way you use those that dime-store vocabulary...you know....so you appear cerebral? It's just the best! Oh, oh..and I love when you try to take the moral high ground, but yet throw in some self-depricating humor from time to time...you know...to humanize yourself to the forum...so they think you are humble...so they won't throw rocks at your silly face!

You are just the best! Keep up the good work...

Oh, and I'm sorry, did we take away from your quippy little thread? Because I see what you were going for here...you titled it like you had gotten into a fight, but then...when we opened it...WOW...it was just a lead-in to a joke...you made us think it was a 'physical fight', BUT, the joke was on us, wasn't it? We then found out it was a fight with your wife! LOL, it was incredible, almost vaudvillian at that! You are truly a comedic genius...I mean how did any of us not see that coming? But there we went, opening your thread...taking the bait - hook, line and sinker! The joke was on US!

Very very clever! One might even call you 'remarkable'!

Pretty sneaky 'Sis!' Oh, I mean 'douche.'

[Scott R. Brown]

Yes, yes, OMG! It was very clever...

You are totally awesome, and funny. I can't be the only one who feels this way, I mean seriously...do you ever go back to your posts and re-read them after you write them? They are hilairious...

...and the way you use those that dime-store vocabulary...you know....so you appear cerebral? It's just the best! Oh, oh..and I love when you try to take the moral high ground, but yet throw in some self-depricating humor from time to time...you know...to humanize yourself to the forum...so they think you are humble...so they won't throw rocks at your silly face!

You are just the best! Keep up the good work...

Oh, and I'm sorry, did we take away from your quippy little thread? Because I see what you were going for here...you titled it like you had gotten into a fight, but then...when we opened it...WOW...it was just a lead-in to a joke...you made us think it was a 'physical fight', BUT, the joke was on us, wasn't it? We then found out it was a fight with your wife! LOL, it was incredible, almost vaudvillian at that! You are truly a comedic genius...I mean how did any of us not see that coming? But there we went, opening your thread...taking the bait - hook, line and sinker! The joke was on US!

Very very clever! One might even call you 'remarkable'!

Pretty sneaky 'Sis!' Oh, I mean 'douche.'

You are not too bad yourself! Do you write for Family Guy? I could see Peter before my eyes doing a flash back and then getting into an endless bloody fight with the Chicken!

[GunnedDownAtrocity]

when my b!tch asks why my word is law, i tell her it's because i'm the one with a pen!s, and apparently she likes the arrangement or she wouldnt stick around after 12 and a half years. if her yappin gets annoying, i tell her im tired of hearing her talk and to go make herself usefull. i say all of these things with the same conviction as if i were speaking to a child. or a dog.

so ... i dont understand how she still always gets her way.

[MasterKiller]

My answer 4 TV's and 3 Dishes! 1 for me that is cable, 1 for her that is CCTV, 1 for her mama that is CCTV, and one for the bedroom that has everything on the planet piped into it! My house looks like a NASA control room from the outside and in!!!!!

But at least I have peace!Is her mom hot?

[GunnedDownAtrocity]

Dude Weipo (Chinese Grandma) Aiyu has 4 teeth is 72 ....

im in. or at least i hope to be.

[Oso]

Yes, yes, OMG! It was very clever...

You are totally awesome, and funny. I can't be the only one who feels this way, I mean seriously...do you ever go back to your posts and re-read them after you write them? They are hilairious...

...and the way you use those that dime-store vocabulary...you know....so you appear cerebral? It's just the best! Oh, oh..and I love when you try to take the moral high ground, but yet throw in some self-depricating humor from time to time...you know...to humanize yourself to the forum...so they think you are humble...so they won't throw rocks at your silly face!

You are just the best! Keep up the good work...

Oh, and I'm sorry, did we take away from your quippy little thread? Because I see what you were going for here...you titled it like you had gotten into a fight, but then...when we opened it...WOW...it was just a lead-in to a joke...you made us think it was a 'physical fight', BUT, the joke was on us, wasn't it? We then found out it was a fight with your wife! LOL, it was incredible, almost vaudvillian at that! You are truly a comedic genius...I mean how did any of us not see that coming? But there we went, opening your thread...taking the bait - hook, line and sinker! The joke was on US!

Very very clever! One might even call you 'remarkable'!

Pretty sneaky 'Sis!' Oh, I mean 'douche.'

i'm not even sure what to say to all that...my joking is fairly transparent and not meant to be that **** funny except to myself. if anyone else finds it at all amusing then fine.

the constant ranting with the SD people is just stupid...as is their side of it as well...and david's inclusion of it into this thread didn't make a bit of sense and then kwaichang jumped in followed by you and it irritated me so I said something about it.

then you want to resort to name calling...pretty much sums up everything anyone needs to know about you.

[lkfmdc]

david's inclusion of it into this thread didn't make a bit of sense



I was cross pollinating humor, which is SOP here (as all BB)... not really trying to have a serious discussion included in the thread....

Which also explains why I really didn't care one way or another at what you posted in reaction... it's nothing serious one way or another

[Oso]

fair enough

[GeneChing]

I remember a tale (http://ezine.kungfumagazine.com/forum/showpost.php?p=859087&postcount=15) about the Spartan women who got tired of the war their men were waging all of the time. They just cut them off and soon the men were crying like babies! There's a lesson to be learned from that....
That would have been Lysistrata, a literary classic that goes back to the 4th century BCE. It's a great read, especially when the warring leaders come together to talk peace, then accuse each other of packing hidden weapons under their robes (it's really their erections).

Ok, that's the end of my literature lesson for today. Y'all can go back to quibbling about how other people practice. It'll make you feel better about your own practice for sure. :rolleyes:

[lkfmdc]

fair enough

... and the world can live as one......

:p:D:p

[Judge Pen]

That would have been Lysistrata, a literary classic that goes back to the 4th century BCE. It's a great read, especially when the warring leaders come together to talk peace, then accuse each other of packing hidden weapons under their robes (it's really their erections).

Ok, that's the end of my literature lesson for today. Y'all can go back to quibbling about how other people practice. It'll make you feel better about your own practice for sure. :rolleyes:

Thanks for the lesson. I think I'll read Lysistrata while holding a horse stance over sharp bamboo pikes. Just to warm up of course.

[Scott R. Brown]

That is interesting, since ****sexuality was encouraged you would think they would just say, "Who needs women?" And then cut THEM off!:D

[Oso]

... and the world can live as one......

:p:D:p

word

:D

[Oso]

Thanks for the lesson. I think I'll read Lysistrata while holding a horse stance over sharp bamboo pikes. Just to warm up of course.

right, then do a bunch of forms and imagine the ways you can kill people.

you SD people are all the same :rolleyes: ;) :p

[TenTigers]

-Lyssistrata-didn't Fellinni make a movie about that with Anthony Quinn and Juilietta Masina?
"Sompano is Here!"

[Mr Punch]

..."Yes honey, you were right and I was wrong", no matter what. I would never say that. My wife doesn't speak English.


OSO better wipe your nose and get the brown off it, I was just answering your Question from earlier. Lk is such a joke I wont respond to the boy any more he takes what you say and twists it into his own lie KCWhat a b!tch.


Yes, yes, OMG! It was very clever...
You are totally awesome, and funny.What a b!tch.


when my b!tch asks why my word is law, i tell her it's because i'm the one with a pen!s, and apparently she likes the arrangement or she wouldnt stick around after 12 and a half years. if her yappin gets annoying, i tell her im tired of hearing her talk and to go make herself usefull. i say all of these things with the same conviction as if i were speaking to a child. or a dog.

so ... i dont understand how she still always gets her way.LOL, what a b!tch.

[Judge Pen]

right, then do a bunch of forms and imagine the ways you can kill people.

you SD people are all the same :rolleyes:

:confused: I didn't throw my hat in that ring. :confused:

[Oso]

:confused: I didn't throw my hat in that ring. :confused:

no way, man. more smileys added...remember, we've crossed gloves and I saw you fight 7 matches in 2 hours winning far more than you lost... :)

[Judge Pen]

no way, man. more smileys added...remember, we've crossed gloves and I saw you fight 7 matches in 2 hours winning far more than you lost... :)

Well yeah, but I imagined killing each one of them, but they all seemed to walk away after the fight. :eek::D