Guardian Beasts

[GeneChing]

I was thinking about a scene from CZ12 where Jackie deals with some guard dogs (release the hounds! ;) ) and saw this in today's SF Chron. It reminded me of so many Bond super villains, like in Live and Let Die or even Skyfall (http://www.kungfumagazine.com/ezine/article.php?article=1070). I have this suspicion that with the trend towards survivalism, there will be more of these, so to test my theory, I'm launching this new thread. I trust that I'll have the forum's assistance in this research. ;)


Guard reptile dies; cruelty charges possible (http://www.sfgate.com/default/article/Guard-reptile-dies-cruelty-charges-possible-4184566.php)
Henry K. Lee
Published 5:51 pm, Thursday, January 10, 2013

http://ww4.hdnux.com/photos/17/23/44/4012331/3/628x471.jpg
Authorities say Assif Mayar fed his dwarf caiman rats but apparently not enough to sustain him. Photo: Alameda County Sheriff

A 5-foot reptile found guarding a house filled with marijuana in Castro Valley has died, and his owner could face animal-cruelty charges in addition to the drug case already filed against him, authorities said Thursday.

The dwarf caiman, named Mr. Teeth, died overnight at the Oakland Zoo's Veterinary Hospital, a day after Alameda County sheriff's deputies found him at a home in Castro Valley along with 34 pounds of dried marijuana.

The creature, which authorities originally misidentified as an alligator, arrived at the zoo "critically ill and nonresponsive," said zoo spokeswoman Nicky Mora.

Staff examined the caiman, took blood samples and determined that his "prognosis was poor," Mora said.

The caiman was not euthanized, the zoo said.

Assif Mayar, 32, got the caiman in 1996 "to commemorate the death of rapper Tupac Shakur" and to help guard his pot stash, said Alameda County sheriff's Sgt. J.D. Nelson.

On Wednesday, deputies went to do a probation compliance check at Mayar's home on the 1900 block of Mount Jasper Road - where he lives with his wife and 2-year-old son - and encountered the caiman inside a 2-by-8-foot Plexiglas tank on top of a wooden pedestal, Nelson said.

Authorities said Mayar apparently fed the caiman rats, but not enough to sustain it.

"We come across guard dogs like pit bulls quite frequently, but a guard (caiman) is very, very unusual," Nelson said.

Caimans are native to tropical regions of Central and South America and live near rivers, streams and other bodies of water. They average 4 to 6 feet in length.

Prosecutors charged Mayar on Thursday with possession of marijuana for sale. The state Department of Fish and Wildlife has also cited him for allegedly possessing a restricted species and animal cruelty.

Henry K. Lee is a San Francisco Chronicle staff writer. E-mail: hlee@sfchronicle.com Twitter: @henryklee

[David Jamieson]

What an a**hole. :mad:

[Lucas]

Tiger Guard
http://web.orange.co.uk/article/quirkies/Guard_dog_with_a_difference


A South African businessman has got himself some extra protection - a Bengal tiger called Enzo.

The 330lb big cat lives with owner Michael Jamison and his girlfriend Jackie at their home in Brakpan.

They had always wanted a pet tiger - but decided to get one after twice being targeted by armed robbers.

"I feel much safer with Enzo in the house than without him," said Mr Jamison. "I wanted a tiger and then I got one."

One-year-old Enzo is actually a big baby who sleeps with Mr Jamison in his bed, has a cat box and enjoys eating on the kitchen counter.

He gets bottle-fed twice a day as well as consuming around 4kg of meat. He eats rice with chicken or mince alongside the couple's three dogs, with whom he is apparently good friends.

Not long after Enzo arrived, police and officers from the department of nature conservation arrived on their doorstep to check him out.

Mr Jamison added: "Everybody wanted to come and rescue the tiger." However, after officials found nothing amiss, Enzo was allowed to stay.

[JamesC]

People are insane.

I'm not even sure you can tame a house cat. They may live there, but they always do their own thing.

I can't imagine why anyone would think a tiger sleeping in your bed is a good idea.

[Sihing73]

I can't imagine why anyone would think a tiger sleeping in your bed is a good idea.

Hmmm, sometimes having a femal tiger in bed can be rewarding and tiring.
Nice to have some wild p***y on occasion ;)

Sorry, could not resist :D

[GeneChing]

I take back my tattletale remark (http://ezine.kungfumagazine.com/forum/showthread.php?p=1205553#post1205553) from earlier today.

This one is slightly OT but worthy of this thread.

Norfolk 911 calls for 'baby lion' turn up a coiffed dog (http://hamptonroads.com/2013/01/norfolk-911-calls-baby-lion-turn-coiffed-dog)

http://media.hamptonroads.com/cache/files/images/1003491000.jpg
Charles is a 3-year-old male Labradoodle whose owner had him groomed to look like a lion. He plays on Tuesday, Jan. 8, 2013 outside University Pizza on Colley Avenue in Norfolk. (Stephen M. Katz | The Virginian-Pilot)

By Patrick Wilson
The Virginian-Pilot
© January 9, 2013

The first caller was fairly calm.

“I’d like to report a lion sighting,” he said.

“Say that again?” a dispatcher responded.

And thus began the drama over baby lion sightings in Norfolk on Tuesday. Police said Wednesday that they actually got three 911 calls about the “lion.”

The first came at 10:19 a.m.

The animal was running on Granby Street, a male voice said.

Then a woman took the phone. She sounded anxious as she described the proximity to the zoo.

“There was a lion that ran across the street. A baby lion. It was about the size of a Labrador retriever.”

It was near Granby and 38th, she said. “It’s roaming loose in the neighborhood.”

A second call came five minutes later.

“I just saw an animal that looked like a small lion.” It had “the mange and everything,” a man said. He had seen it on Delaware Avenue near Llewellyn Avenue.

“I don’t know if it got away from the zoo, or what,” he said.

The dispatcher said they already had received a report. “I’m not sure if it actually is a lion or not, but I’ll update the information.”

A third call came at 1:19 p.m.

“I just saw a baby lion at Colley Avenue and 50th Street,” a man reported.

“What kind of animal?” the dispatcher later asked him.

“A lion. A baby lion, maybe.”

The lion was going to nearby houses. “I don’t think it has caused any problem so far,” said the caller.

“OK. You think it’s looking for food?” the dispatcher asked.

“I don’t know.”

By now, most folks know that the “baby lion” was actually Charles the Monarch, a Labrador-poodle mix owned by Daniel Painter, who lives in Riveriew and has a garden center on Colley Avenue. He has the dog groomed to look like the Old Dominion University mascot.

Many people say they see Charles out a lot, especially on Colley. But to someone who hasn’t seen him, he sure doesn’t look like a dog at first.

Coverage of the lion sightings went national on Wednesday. Charles was featured on NBC’s “Today,” where even Al Roker agreed: The dog looks like a lion.

Patrick Wilson, 757-222-3893, patrick.wilson@pilotonline.com

[bawang]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_VKWLC87Uzw

[Syn7]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_VKWLC87Uzw

I love how normal it is for them. Like yeah, donkeys are cool if you dont have a woman.

[Kellen Bassette]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_VKWLC87Uzw

Why do I click on your links???:confused:

[wenshu]

Why do I click on your links???:confused:

You're learning! Consider it a Kung Fu Magazine Forum rite of passage.

[Ben Gash]

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-19576296

For visitors to Yamoussoukro, the official capital of Ivory Coast and the birth place of its first president, the crocodiles are a major attraction, especially at feeding time.

For close to four decades ****o Toki, originally from neighbouring Mali, was in charge of feeding the sacred animals.

He knew them all by name and they responded to his call - Capitaine, Chef de Cabinet, Commandant - authoritarian names, for these were the guardians of Ivory Coast's founding father, Felix Houphouet-Boigny, who governed for 33 years and shared ****o's nickname - Le Vieux (the old).

Le Vieux ****o carried out his dangerous work for years but the best he could offer his family was a simple one-storey home around a crowded courtyard.

His boss, President Houphouet-Boigny lived in rather grander style. He turned his ancestral land into a vast presidential palace dubbed the Versailles of Africa.


The Basilica of Notre Dame de la Paix: 158m tall
In 1983, the small home town became the "capital in the jungle" - with a seven-storey convention centre, the world's biggest church - imagine Rome's Saint Peter's surrounded by a tropical swamp - and a world class golf course.

In 1994 President Houphouet-Boigny was buried inside the palace grounds, guarded by an artificial lake and the city's sacred crocodiles.

A good friend of mine says that on the day of Houphouet-Boigny's funeral he saw with his own eyes a man screaming "Houphouet is dead, why should I live?" before throwing himself in the lake where the crocodiles had him for dinner.

Continue reading the main story
“
Start Quote

****o made a regular show of pulling the giant monsters by their tail”

The palace is not open to visitors, but the lake is something of a tourist attraction. At exactly five o'clock, they head to the lake in front of the imposing palace gates for feeding time - ****o Toki's moment in the limelight.

The crocodiles - and there are at least a dozen - get around 30kg of meat a day, and other treats.

Most days visitors - often Ivorian - pay ****o and his assistants for the privilege of watching a live chicken being thrown to the waiting reptiles. I have been there myself - microphone primed for that dying squawk and crunch of bone and feathers. The poor things rarely last more than a few seconds.


The evening feeding frenzy is at once intriguing and horrifying. The Nobel-prize-winning author V S Naipaul was captivated by the ritual, which formed a central part of his essay The Crocodiles of Yamoussoukro, published in 1984.

Continue reading the main story
A ceremony of kingship

The ritual takes place in the afternoon, in bright light. There are the cars, the tourists in bright clothes, the cameras. But the crocodiles are sacred. A live offering - a chicken - has to be made to them; it is part of the ritual.

This element of sacrifice, this protracted display of power and cruelty, is as unsettling as it is meant to be, and it seems to bring night and the forest close again to the dream of Yamoussoukro.

V S Naipaul, The Crocodiles of Yamoussoukro, New Yorker (1984)

These sacred beasts made him wonder if Africa could ever be modern.

Houphouet-Boigny - still president at the time - was on the one hand a head of state, who had studied medicine, served as a government minister in France and now ruled what was then considered one of Africa's most successful modern countries.

On the other hand - he was a tribal chief, living in a giant palace protected by sacred crocodiles, who - the rumours said - required sacrifices.

The crocodile feeding was, according to Naipaul, a "public ceremony of kingship". The crocodiles, it was said, could warn the president of trouble with a simple move of the head.

Crocodiles have a mythic role for Ivory Coast's largest ethnic group - the Baoule, who live around Yamoussoukro.

Continue reading the main story
From Our Own Correspondent

Broadcast on Saturdays at 11:30 BST on BBC Radio 4, and weekdays on BBC World Service
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The ethnic group of Houphouet-Boigny fled from what is now Ghana three centuries ago - and to cross a river, the river god told the queen to sacrifice her only child.

When this was done, the tribe was able to cross the river on the backs of hippos and crocodiles who lined up to form a bridge.

A Baoule proverb says: "When in the middle of a river, do not insult the crocodile."

****o did not insult the crocodiles. Instead he had a reputation as their dedicated master and carer. Many said they could communicate with each other. ****o made a regular show of pulling the giant monsters by their tail - posing for photographs next to a carpet of carnivores.

****o's final day at work was during the Muslim festival at the end of the Ramadan fast.


The crocodiles responded to ****o's call
Like many other Ivorian Muslims that day, he was wearing the long-flowing boubou and with his rusty machete in one hand he could have been a Jedi knight from the Star Wars films.

For once, ****o was not quite as sure-footed as in the days when Houphouet-Boigny was alive.

As he skipped over the last crocodile on his way to the barrier, the reptile caught hold of his robe. Not something he had not dealt with before but as he swung his machete, he lost balance and fell to the ground.

One of the biggest crocodiles - Chef de Cabinet - was nearby to make sure he did not stay on the ground for long. This being modern Africa, at least two people were filming at the time and captured the crowd's chilling screams.

By several accounts though, the Vieux did not cry out as the crocodile took him out to the middle of the lake.

His family held funeral prayers last week, though none of his remains have been recovered.

The governor of Yamoussoukro, Augustin Thiam - an urbane intellectual, related to Houphouet-Boigny, summed up the shock many Ivorians felt: "Perhaps there is a message behind this," he said. "We need perhaps to consult the spirits."

Naipaul would not be surprised.

[Syn7]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QhZt_cXz9xs

it's sad when anyone dies, I guess. But if anyone was on borrowed time, it was this guy. IMO he pretty much asked for it and got it. I shed no tears for people who use and abuse wild animals for any agenda then die because of it. A part of me says "Good for the Croc, get yours." If you take this kind of thing for granted, I'm not gonna lose any sleep when it bites you in the ass. Or drags you into a lake and death rolls your ass, as it was here.

[Ben Gash]

How was he using and abusing them? He was their keeper.

[Syn7]

How was he using and abusing them? He was their keeper.

Go watch the rest of the clips on what they do daily. They are basically captive, first of all. They only really get to eat what they are fed and men seem to think its manly to go prod them, kick them, pull their tails etc... Wild animals are not here for our entertainment. As far as I'm concerned, he got his.

Like that woman who had a baby lion that slept with her. Eventually it grew up and all was good. A year later it mulled her to death. Stupid woman. The lion did our species a favor!

[bawang]

Go watch the rest of the clips on what they do daily. They are basically captive, first of all. They only really get to eat what they are fed and men seem to think its manly to go prod them, kick them, pull their tails etc... Wild animals are not here for our entertainment. As far as I'm concerned, he got his.

Like that woman who had a baby lion that slept with her. Eventually it grew up and all was good. A year later it mulled her to death. Stupid woman. The lion did our species a favor!

its not their fault, its modern cultures fault for anthropomorphing animals.

[David Jamieson]

its not their fault, its modern cultures fault for anthropomorphing animals.

modern?

Dude, people have been anthropomorphizing animals since the beginning of time.
Even deifying them to go one step beyond application of human attributes to beasts!

I think it's important to recognize that we are no further ahead now as far as evolved thinking goes. That happens in pockets and slowly leaks out to the rest of us.

[bawang]

modern?

Dude, people have been anthropomorphizing animals since the beginning of time.
Even deifying them to go one step beyond application of human attributes to beasts!

I think it's important to recognize that we are no further ahead now as far as evolved thinking goes. That happens in pockets and slowly leaks out to the rest of us.

what hasnt changed is peoples need for love. the difference today is animals are used as substitutes for human love.

[Syn7]

what hasnt changed is peoples need for love. the difference today is animals are used as substitutes for human love.

WTF does that have to do with ******* people abusing animals in some weakminded ****ing contest to show who has the biggest little dick?

And for the record, saying 'it's not peoples fault, it's cultures fault' is crazy. Culture is collective consciousness. We are culture. So if it's a cultural problem, it's the fault of those within said culture. Everytime our culture (Canada) does something wrong and you, David or I don't stand up against it, we are complicit and assume part of this guilt. Culture changes when people change. Not much else to it.

[bawang]

WTF does that have to do with ******* people abusing animals in some weakminded ****ing contest to show who has the biggest little dick?
i was more thinking about people dressing up their dogs and cats, and that pet chimpanzee that ate a womans face.

[Syn7]

i was more thinking about people dressing up their dogs and cats, and that pet chimpanzee that ate a womans face.

Ha, no doubt about that. But then I just see that as nature weeding out idiots.

[bawang]

Ha, no doubt about that. But then I just see that as nature weeding out idiots.

my point was thats not the peoples fault. if they were born in china and ate some dog feet and monkey brains as kids, they would be still living today.

dont play with your food.

[Syn7]

my point was thats not the peoples fault. if they were born in china and ate some dog feet and monkey brains as kids, they would be still living today.

ok im with you till you make silly statement like that. I don't even need a google search to know that chinese people are mauled by pets all the time.

[bawang]

ok im with you till you make silly statement like that. I don't even need a google search to know that chinese people are mauled by pets all the time.

i joke, joke. i wanted to add that crocodile trainer has to do flashy things with the crocodiles to get paid by tourists, its his livelihood. he had no choice. if you dont hit the crocodiles they can lay still for literally days.

[Syn7]

i joke, joke. i wanted to add that crocodile trainer has to do flashy things with the crocodiles to get paid by tourists, its his livelihood. he had no choice. if you dont hit the crocodiles they can lay still for literally days.

Word.

But.....


**** their money! :D

[bawang]

Word.

But.....


**** their money! :D

thats the idealistic way of thinking, until you dont eat for three days.

under poverty people will do lots of things to survive. i even considered teaching kung fu once.

those "sacred docile" crocodiles probably developed instinct to avoid fighting humans through thousands of years of fighting. if a crocodile considers you a threat it will not attack you. sad when locals start to believe its their grandfathers reincarnated though.

[Syn7]

I have more respect for pickpockets. The man in the pit was anything but poor.

[Kellen Bassette]

under poverty people will do lots of things to survive. i even considered teaching kung fu once.



LOL..nice...I've went as far as getting a job before...(hangs his head in shame)