You know your in a McKwoon when...

[Jeff Liboiron]

10. You instructor has a Grandmasters Certificate. In Crayon.

9. The Senior Assistant Instructor is a 4 year old black sash.

8. The sign in the window says the school trains in more than
10 martial arts.

7. Its a Korean art. {g}

6. Your instructor tries to sell you Amway products.

5. While examining the schools tournament trophies,
you find 3 for spelling bees.

4. Reading the contract for the school is considered a form (and a long one at that).

3. No one sweats.

2. While at a tournament, your opponent finds out who your teacher is and high-fives his teacher.

1. When paying for your sash examinations, the instructor asks: "Do you want fries with that?"

The object is not to hurt someone else, but to stop them from hurting you

[Kristoffer]

:D

~K~
"maybe not in combat.. but think of the chicks man, the chicks!" -- someone on the subject of back-flips in combat --

[jon]

11 When your given your black belt for staying though the first two mouths.
12 When no one actualy knows who taught the 'master' in the first place, even the instructor.
13 When there are more high level masters than there are students.
14 When your encouraged to uttilise 'The Force' while training.
15 You have forms for a lightsabre
16 Your school name is made up of at least 3 different nationalitys languages.
17 The intructor repeatly hits himself while trying to perform weapon sets.
18 To get to the 'higher' levels you basicaly have to pay a large fee.
19 Everytime there is sparring someone is seriously hurt.
20 The class is usualy taken by whoever happens to be at the front in line.

you cant win all the time but you cant always lose either...

[NorthernMantis]

21 They think the sash is a rank when it was just clothes back in China and it came in different colors

22 The teacher calls himself his holyness

23 The teacher makes the class watch David Caradine tapes to teach new techniques

to be continued...

"Always be ready"

"right, that's it!you've insulted me, and you've insulted the shaolin temple!"-Fish of Furry

[jon]

The lightsabre form is the highest set in the system.
There are comments from Yoda on the walls.
When asking the instructor about his fee structure he attemps the Jedi mind trick before telling you.
Instructors and masters wear hooded robes.
The grandmaster was apperently a sith.

hehe sorry im just in a star wars mood tonight.

you cant win all the time but you cant always lose either...

[HuangKaiVun]

you DON'T know until somebody points it out to you.

[Kung Lek]

I would say that Huang has it.

It's true, many don't know what a good Kung Fu school is and only go by the limited understanding they have and the trappings they see on the walls.

A good Kung Fu school is usually NOT open to the public in many many cases and they are very difficult to find, never mind to get instruction at. At least in my experience that's the way it is.

Even bonafide masters who do have good schools have a pretty strict criteria before they will teach you anything.

so, if you are turned away the first few times you try to go, you're likely onto something good so be persistent.

but if you walk into a mall and the teacher says pay up and I'll make you the next bruce lee, chances are you are being swindled.

many of the best Kung Fu teachers teach their arts under the auspices of various other associations, like nationalist associations or family associations or chinese freemasons associations.

your typical run of the mill "mall" school may give you some practical self defense stuff and some genuine forms even, but I'm not certain as to the depth you will be able to get to in these types of schools.

but that's just my opinion, a lot of really good teachers are lightening the restrictions and allowing for those who are eager to learn to do so.

still, there are not many of these.

peace

Kung Lek

Martial Arts Links (http://members.home.net/kunglek)

[HuangKaiVun]

Some of the best teaching I've had was in McKwoons.