No_Know Says

[No_Know]

I get lost in what people are into or believe matter. I leave my quiet strange practices to compare myself and find me lacking.

Until I learn...

People, lurkers, newbies...I was kicking a tree in a new way for me and it was virtually painless. I eventually realized that that area of the foot is the slap zone for the kicks in Basics class. Wow! If I practiced the Basiscs exercises more I would have a form of iron skin training--Kicking with less hurt.

I'm figuring that there are other such things in class. I hope that you will...The first school to which I went had the head of the System; was Shao-Lin descended; had animal styles drunken and cripple forms (I found more, great stuff out later). So I had no idea of charlatans and made-up schools to get your money and all that stuff for which to look out. So (needle and thread) my initial advice of have Faith doesn't necessarily count for your situation.

You'll have to do what you think is best. Know what you would like then look with that in mind.

Good luck or prayers...much the best to many you all.

[No_Know]

Exercises I've made-up~ or liked have been twenty minutes or forty minutes about to complete once. Sometimes it's an effort-ish. But doing your basics drills even though they are an effort can be So much more nice than ninemonths later or three or twelve years later thinking it wasn't so bad. I could have done it. And if I had've kept it up I would be Soooooo much better now [insert Shame here].

[Cody]

Understand. However, the shame gets in the way. You see, it lowers morale and discourages. Better to acknowledge what happened for what it was, a mistake in prioritizing one's energies or time. The mistake can be interpreted in many ways, but you get my point. Realize how the error of skipping practice time occurred and fed upon itself. Then, begin anew. This is most easily done if circumstances have remained relatively stable. If not, if there has been deterioration in one's physical or heart being, or both, then that can become like a wall to the further development of self, and hence, we have dispair.
So, the heck with being ashamed of faltering, of being lazy, or of becoming so busy that minutes of practice that could have accumulated fell between the cracks. Those are my feelings, expressed as words of encouragement, from one who is very discouraged indeed.

Cody

[No_Know]

Then in answering me with Truth. I hope that you Saw what you were saying. If not, look above this post. It would still be there in print~. :-) And I hope that the truth you spoke can be heard by your Heart and Rational mind. And brighterness taints the Darkness within that at this moment flees before my mention and your realization.

[Cody]

Beautifully said. And, you are corrrect.
I got other advice. I was told I should resume my training, even with altered goals. I was told I should think positively and not let anything stop me. Life is hard now. The funeral and other stuff that is dumped on me, feeling dumped too. Eustachian tubes messed up from crying and from airplane flights. I'm a pip here. It's taking all my resolve to figure out why I'm living from one day to anyother. I used to sit in a moderate horse stance. It took me a long time to get it right. I feel like a mess. I'm not ashamed of who I am, but I am for what I have to show for it and how the appearances have been distorted by others, and I let them. It's like a whirlpool dragging me down. and, I'm afraid to hold on to a hand offered because the last one hit me.
You're right. Don't know what I can do about it now though.

Cody, thinking

[No_Know]

Ashamed of what you have to show for it? This seems to require Knowing what people think (of you). I once liked a particular girl in High school. After one of our last classes I went over to her and complimented her and the like and she said that she had No idea I liked her~. Another femme was born on my birthday (or other-way-around) I liked her and throughout the semesters eventually heard of her recent marriage and child? Or some-such, perhaps. When I talked with them neither seemed as opposed to being with me as I had thought. We might know the stereotypes and media determined social discrepancies but actual people are not all straight stereotypes. We don't Know.

Some people can manipulate others and that's mainly their goal, to develop that. If you're doing this and that or this or that to be accepted You don't really want to be accepted by them or that person. They are pupeteers. I don't think you Want to be a puppet or the such.

We would like to be loved and cared for. but if we can't feel that we settle for Believing that we are loved and or or cared for. Illusions that comfort until we embrace them seeking their support. As they are Illusions or masks or reflections of desperation there is not anything to which to hold -on.

Love happens. It's there. People care. We merely don't know. A lack of healty communicating. You Need the real things.

People have whims. People like to be entertained. These can get combined. I think you cater to people who don't particularly care about you but are passing time. Do something other than put stock in people to get something from them.


What matters? That you thhink what you are doing at that precise moment is beautiful. Every moment. Being comfortable. Breathing. Appreciating--Fun, Joy.

These might get you a perspective shift on the people in your life and those who come in and had been there but you ...

If you are not ashamed of who you are then you are quite a fine person. Anyone not liking quite a fine person has issues. You are not a magazine store. Do other than deal with other people's issues. Do for you. They won't be around when the weather changes to dark. Care for the ones who are there for You.

If you can't tell, then merely do Happy things for you. There is not enough living in this life to live other people's lives. Live yours. Love it! Appreciate it. Enjoy! Be.

I could be happy with such a wonderful person as you. Perhaps you should too. Knowing that other people's thought are motivated by self interest-ish, don't be tricked into thinking bad of such a beautiful person.

"Don't know what I can do about it now though."

"It" doesn't matter. If you can enjoy yourself you can Enjoy Life.

Do That. :-)

[scotty1]

First sign of madness?

[guohuen]

No, complaining about the weather is the first sign of madness. The second is wearing inappropriate clothing for the temperature.

[Cody]

I can't claim to understand everything that other people write. I haven't here, but enough got thru. Sometimes, I go back and can't figure what I've written. Robert Browning claimed to have the same difficulty with his own poetry.

The manifestations of mind and emotion can be categorized as on the border of madness by those who experience life differently. Merely a lack of recognition of an unfamiliar pattern of life or speech. It just is, and might have no quality beyond that.

In a sense, the discussion that No-Know has started might be thought of as a sort of a creative free fall. Good idea.

Responsibility, etc.:
Everyone is responsible for who they are, what they think, what they say, what they do. That's the way it's supposed to be. The higher one's knowledge, the greater the degree of responsibility, and the greater should be the avoidance of proud glory. With that, I believe, should be a lesser tendency to raised hackles. It's a difficult balance at best.

Development of acceptance of responsibility over time is a socially understood concept, in terms of coming of age. Yet, in adulthood, there are many levels still, which are not necessarily in functional accord with one's placement. In fact, it can be said that, practically speaking, one has nothing to do with the other. This leads to disillusion and deception because human animals are given to the same hierachical categorization as packs of other animals, with variations according to inclination and geography.

When a community, or one person, possibly one person at a time (who then leaves, or is forced to leave the scene), gets caught in another's madness or flaws, appearances can make for mistaken identity of who is ill/flawed, and who is in the line of fire as a subordinate or dependent. The instability/operative faults of the dominant player seep into the roots of a follower, a helper, a partner and affect them in terms of their own makeup. (The apparent role reversal can also be part of a manipulative deception to avoid taking responsibility for one's influence.) The effected people exhibit changes or deterioration according to who they were to begin with. A person who was not inherently mean, will not turn mean even with fertilized opportunities to do so. A kind person might become kind to a fault, not taking proper care of the self, while assuming the responsibility of helping someone who gives mixed signals. These are complex dynamics and some people aren't aware of the causes. It's a way to find out what you're made of, but, I would say it's a way that should be avoided.

Occurrences and walking.
A person who has been part of your life for years, who has maintained the structure of an extended family, dies. The structure changes, and people use that to maintain placement or to fit differently into what the extended family is to become. You turn around. No Mom.
You go to the funeral mass. Difficult, especially being an athiest, but good to see others derive comfort from what they believe. On entering the church, you remember that it's the place where you got married. You are divorced, a divorce you wanted then and now. You're sitting next to your ex. Fine. All of a sudden, it becomes a funeral mass for ex mom-in-law, and for something else. You worry that a fine friendship, and your way of life are going down the tubes because of other stuff going on. You had settled into fortunate numbness at the funeral palor, before entering the church and remembering. Then that falls apart. Everything does. Even that which is not directly related to this loss. It's like all the petals fall off the flower at once. The funeral was on 5 Sept.

I see a possible direction to walk, but haven't been able to embrace it. It feels like where I've been before (not this lifetime) and where I might return. Study would once again be the focus of my life, leaving most everything behind. The atheist living in a mountain temple. Yet, from what I have experienced in this lifetime, that makes me sad too. There is great loss, but there's also the living.
How do I describe what has happened to me? If a noble person cannot walk, but can stand and asks you, a loving helper, to miraculously move him to take a step that changes the direction of his life in some way he seems to want, and you do that, make sure that when the other leg moves it's not poised to kick you because his mind is divided. This is sabatoging one's self and also a helper. Let's not go into what happens when helper evades the kick, cheers that the noble man is walking, and remains devoted.

I recently spoke briefly with an elderly Master. He feels I should go back to training, even if I can't do some of the things I did before, and not let anything stop me. I was going to try (remembering his honest and kind words), and then contact him, as he had asked. Then, the funeral and other stuff that's going ptoooey.

The self-motivated perseverance and resolve which had been invaluable in KF studies had been divided between that and the situation of the noble man who could not walk, an allegory. I wished to heal and restore many things, but there was immense resistance of a sort that it took me years to comprehend. The division of effort became lopsided because of circumstances. I'm worn out.

No_Know is nudging me to make a move for me. Not for what I might have been, but for what I am now. and that is the problem, as my perseverance and feelings are as they were and probably will remain so, but the times are changing around me, and I miss feeling alive in my practice. It is clear an adjustment needs to be made, without the luxury of having decades to retrieve my health and work.

You're right, No_Know, I'm not a puppet. Thank you. I'll reread what you've said.

very best,
Cody

[diego]

My belly is full, i just ate a jalepeno & cheese foccacia bread!. "insert thunderbolt here"

[No_Know]

Kung-Fu people need no cross training in ground techniques or whatever one called on KFO Ryu was saying.

I find one merely needs the conceptualizations of Result, relevant to moving their body, and Trying techniques... A typical Kung-Fu person could take a few techniques and several principles and become formidable if grounded. But, a whole System would not be required to be at least competant in ground occurances.

[jun_erh]

No know how's the breakdancing going? Ever try hula hula dancing? It's da bomb-ish

[M_ArtsMargie]

HULA? TOHISHAN? Shake, shake shake.
Kuiia maka maka owe!<-------hawaiian

[No_Know]

I No_Know why jun_ehr says that.

Ohhhh? Hawaiian? Hmmmm? It sounds good.

[No_Know]

Ia hoiia ku :-) Most definitely