Question for all grappling instructors

[TenTigers]

We would like to add grappling-meaniing, takedown, sprawls, mounts, passing the guard and reversals, and some submissions and chokes-nothing too involved, just basics.
The problem arises when you have to teach women, and teens. Alot of people have difficulty with close hands on grappling,(and I would have a problem teaching it) there is always the chance of an "innapropriate touch?"or uncomfortable situation. How do you teach girls, women, and teens, while keeping it comfortable?
One possibility is separating them-but that excludes alot of realism, special heavy judo gis would help, but more is needed.

[Ryu]

Well it can be a difficult subject depending on the person. I teach women, and I usually let them know ahead of time what is being offered in the lessons. Grappling and groundfighting is extremely important for self-defense (both men and women), but yes, it becomes and issue with those who want to make it an issue. Let the girls decide for themselves if they want to partake in the grappling course. I'm sure a lot will have no problem with it. Just let them know that the course IS close contact, and much of it will be on the floor. If you keep the teaching atmosphere fun, instructional, and focused on the technical and strategic aspects of groundfighting you should be okay.
Seperating the classes so that females will grapple with females is also a good idea. However, before you do any of this, it's important that you and your instructors have a very knowledable base in grappling. Teaching basics of grappling requires a thorough understanding of the whole art. You don't necessarily have to be a black belt in BJJ, but you should have spent more than two or three years actively grappling.

Hope that helps.
Take care,

Ryu

[HuangKaiVun]

You're a big strong guy in the 6 foot range, TenTigers.

I'd recommend starting off by having you grapple the females exclusively, as you are the sifu and thus have their trust.

You need to explain to them that some accidental contact will take place. Students KNOW when contact is accidental or not.

After a while, you'll figure out which males will grapple and which males will grope.

Most of the folks on KFO fall into the "grope" category, unfortunately.

[Merryprankster]

Most of the folks on KFO fall into the "grope" category, unfortunately.

And you base this unfounded assertion on what, precisely?

Anyway,

My advice--let the women only grapple each other at first, if that's what they want (if they don't care, cool), but warn them point blank that they will eventually have to grapple with men or they'll be short-changing themselves.

[fragbot]

Originally posted by TenTigers
The problem arises when you have to teach women, and teens. Alot of people have difficulty with close hands on grappling,(and I would have a problem teaching it) there is always the chance of an "innapropriate touch?"or uncomfortable situation. How do you teach girls, women, and teens, while keeping it comfortable?

Well, I imagine some people (male or female) won't ever be comfortable with the close contact. We only have one female who works out with us and I know for a fact (she's a good friend of mine beyond training; I initially convinced her to workout with us) she's only felt uncomfortable with one person--a guy she couldn't stand personally. And yes, periodically, you *will* get an unintentional handful. I've never asked her, but I'd wager she'd be able to tell the difference between someone working hard and, er, someone working to get hard.

FWIW, it can work the other way as well. It's never happened to me, but one of the fellas I workout with was doing newaza with a female and she grabbed his package. He thought it was intentional.

One possibility is separating them-but that excludes alot of realism, special heavy judo gis would help, but more is needed.

I'm not sure how much judo gis will help, but if you use them, make sure everyone wears a t-shirt underneath. For a simple reason, it's nasty doing groundwork over someone's sweaty chest.

If it were me, I wouldn't separate them.

[HuangKaiVun]

Your statements show that you've never had to grapple against anybody who'd cheap shot you, Merryprankster.

Anybody who really has fought knows who'll grope even by just talking to them. We've got a lot of jerks on KFO who'll cheap shot anybody, though I won't say that you fall into that category YET (you're getting DANGEROUSLY CLOSE though).

I teach women how to grapple 6 days a week. So I'm actually doing this for a living, unlike you. "Unfounded statement" my butt.

[fragbot]

Originally posted by HuangKaiVun
Your statements show that you've never had to grapple against anybody who'd cheap shot you, Merryprankster.

Anybody who really has fought knows who'll grope even by just talking to them. We've got a lot of jerks on KFO who'll cheap shot anybody, though I won't say that you fall into that category YET (you're getting DANGEROUSLY CLOSE though).

Ummm, are you using grope in the context of fondling someone for sexual pleasure? I'm pretty certain much of the discussion focuses on this meaning as opposed to the "fumbling about wildly."

I teach women how to grapple 6 days a week. So I'm actually doing this for a living, unlike you. "Unfounded statement" my butt.

From what I can tell, you just accused the majority of the people on KFO as wanting to cop a feel on their training partner. If you're going to make that accusation, I'll hafta say you know something about our online compadres that I don't. Put another way, I think that's a wholly unreasonable and extraordinary claim to make.

[HuangKaiVun]

I seriously doubt that you train in a school that has contact combat grappling between men and women, fragbot.

Do that enough and you'll SENSE people's intentions, especially after they cheapshot you a few times on the Net or in sparring. People show their true nature sooner or later.

By the way, you've just showed me yours.

[Laughing Cow]

IMO, Ryu and MP had the best answers.

We often got a similar problem with Push hands and similar.

[Merryprankster]

HKV,

Yes, you're right. You can tell everything about a person's intentions over the internet, minus body language, facial expresions and situational grasp, all of which are VITAL to that little *****ly feeling that tells you this ain't goin' so hot.

Secondly, we may be working with different language. Groping to me is illicit, unwanted, intentional sexual contact. Cheap shots are just that.

I've known plenty of scummy *******s who have the guts to grope people but wouldn't dare do anything violent. But your CMA training has not only taught you to fight, it's taught you both psychoanalysis and has granted you long distance ESP!

You called "most" of the people here on KFO sexual predators and you expect I won't call you on it. Please.

I forgot what an arrogant ***** you are.

That's about the only thing I really can't stand.

Good day.

[yenhoi]

Just for the record I will cop a feel at any opporatunity.

and this isent KFO anymore, its kungfumagazine forums!

KFO is all about REALITY COMBAT!!!

[HuangKaiVun]

You wouldn't dare call me an "arrogant *****" in real life, MerryPrankster.

That's because before you finished your sentence, I'd be chasing you up and down trying to get a piece of you.

See, you're the exact type of coward who hides behind an Internet identity and cheap shots others. If you'll do it to ME (who'd attack you the moment you did that), you'd do it to a lesser opponent. Don't even give me that BS that you wouldn't do it in person to a female who you felt that you'd go after.

We deal with people like you all the time in this line of business.

[yenhoi]

No you wouldent HKV.

Nobody goes around randomly attacking people for half-sentances and stays on the streets legally for very long.

I doubt you deal with MP's type in real life often. His identity is all over the net, and unlike you, he has videos of himself in action, availiable on the net. But your right, he wouldent say that in real life, because he doesnt go around picking fights with randoms. Im sure. Most pagans dont.

Why do you dig so many holes? not all threads require you to challenge and threaten people.

Get over it you snob.

Ill be in phenix some day, and Ill come check your silly school out, and Ill make smart ass comments, and I doubt you will do anything of the sort, and Im sure you can show off your skill and boast and this and that, and touch hands and threaten, and kock people over, or throw them and all your other MA magic, but your all bark man. Ill even come bail you out of jail someday if you want. Just call me up.

[HuangKaiVun]

Your little butt will NEVER show up, yenhoi.

My experience shows that guys like you won't dare visit, no matter how bad you think my kung fu is. As I said, we get guys like you who think they're tougher than us visiting all the time.

I'd tell you to bring your SIFU to make yourself feel safer, but I won't bother because you won't come anyway. It doesn't matter that I'm virtually local to you.

Your likelihood of visiting? 0.000000000%.

[shaolin kungfu]

You are the dumbest person I know of, Huang.