...and now, a joke

[Kristoffer]

Oh to clear up this.. my joke isn't a joke. It's not supposed to be funny. It's meant to trick people to listen to you talkin a long time then **** them off when they realize they will never know what the frikkin ping pong balls are for

MESS WITH YOUR HEAD

[Starchaser107]

4 shame csn
4 shame

[Kristoffer]

CSN, that was a GDA style joke

[Chang Style Novice]

Hey, I gave fair warning.

So, what did the Buddhist say to the hotdog vendor?

[Former castleva]

"Make me one with everything".

[Kristoffer]

[Kristoffer]

The head priest at a certain church was out for the day, so he asked the deacon to do confession for him. The deacon agrees, and the first person that comes says, "Forgive me, for I just gave a guy a blow job." He says, "You have sinned."

Then he looks at the sheet on the wall that had punishments for certain sins on it, but blow job was not on there, so he went out to ask one of the altar boys what he usually gives for a blow job. The altar boy answered, "Oh, about five dollars."

[Kristoffer]

A woman walks up to an old man sitting in a chair on his porch. "I couldn't help but notice how happy you look," she said. "What's your secret for a long, happy life?" "I smoke three packs a day, drink a case of beer, eat fatty foods, and never, ever exercise," he replied. "Wow, that's amazing," she said, "How old are you?" "Twenty-six."

[Starchaser107]

Lucky Frog


A man takes the day off of work and decides to go out golfing. He is on the second hole when he notices a frog sitting next to the green. He thinks nothing of it and is about to shoot when he hears, "Ribbit. 9 Iron"
The man looks round and doesn't see anyone so he tries again. "Ribbit. 9 Iron." He looks at the frog and decides to prove the frog wrong, puts his other club away, and grabs a 9 iron. Boom! he hits a birdie. He is shocked.

He says to the frog, "Wow that's amazing. You must be a lucky frog eh?" The frog reply's "Ribbit, Lucky frog. Lucky frog." The man decided to take the frog with him to the next hole. "What do you think frog?", the man asks. "Ribbit 3 wood." was the reply.

The guy takes out a 3 wood and Boom! Hole in one. The man is befuddled and doesn't know what to say. By the end of the day, the man golfed the best game of golf in his life and asks the frog, "Ok where to next?" The frog reply, "Ribbit Las Vegas".

They go to Las Vegas and the guy says, "Ok frog, now what?" The frog says, "Ribbit Roulette". Upon approaching the roulette table the man asks," what do you think I should bet?" The frog replies, "Ribbit $3000 black 6." Now, this is a million to one shot that this would win but after the golf game, the man figures what the heck. Boom! Tons of cash comes sliding back across the table.

The man takes his winnings and buys the best room in the hotel. He sits the frog down and says, "Frog, I don't know how to repay you. You won me all this money and I am forever grateful." The frog replies, "Ribbit, Kiss Me".

He figures why not, since after all the frog did for him he deserves it.

All of a sudden the frog turns into the most gorgeous 16 year old girl in the world.

And that, your honor, is how the girl ended up in my room".

[Kristoffer]

LOL

[Chang Style Novice]

former castleteva -

So the vendor gives the buddhist a dog with the works, and the buddhist hands him back a ten dollar bill. The vendor says, "Okay, next!" and the buddhist stops him, saying "what about my change?" Then the hotdog vendor smiles calmly, peers into his eyes and whispers "Change comes from within."

Kristoffer -

No, no! The altarboy says "A Pepsi and a Milky Way."

[Kristoffer]

[Chang Style Novice]

Did I ever tell you guys my funny story about the Jonestown Massacre? I'd tell you now, except the punchline is too long.

[Ming Yue]

Two nuns are working hard to ensure that the new hospital they have built will be ready for the community's needy.

They are about to begin painting the interior when the first nun says, "These are the only habits we have, it would be a shame to get paint on them." The second nun agrees and they decide to cover the windows with dropcloths, strip down to thier skivvies and paint that way.

They are a ways into painting when they hear a knock at the front door.

"yes?" says the first nun, "who's there?"

"blind man", comes the answer from outside.

They look through the peephole and see a rather old man wearing very dark glasses. The sisters are excited at the prospect of helping thier first community member, and as one reaches for thier habits, the other whispers, "he can't see, let's just let him in. Besides, we're covered in paint spots." The other nun agrees and they open the door, and let the man in.

He walks in and says, "nice t its. where do you want me to hang the blinds?"

[Chang Style Novice]

How do you get a nun pregnant? Disguise her as an altarboy.