...and now, a joke

[Starchaser107]

lol.

way too many nun jokes going on on this forum... some people have issues.

[Starchaser107]

>>FIRST GRADER'S TEST
>>
>>A first-grade teacher was having trouble with one of her students.
>>
>>The teacher asked, "Harry what is your problem?"
>>
>>Harry answered, "I'm too smart for the first-grade. My sister is in
>>the third-grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in
>>the third-grade too!"
>>
>>The teacher had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office.
>>While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to
>>the principal what the situation was. The principal told the
>>teacher he would give the boy a test and if he failed to answer any
>>of his questions he was to go back to the first-grade and behave.
>>The teacher agreed. Harry was brought in and the conditions were
>>explained to him and he agreed to take the test.
>>
>>Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
>>Harry: "9"
>>
>>Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"
>>Harry: "36"
>>
>>And so it went with every question the principal thought a
>>third-grade should know. The principal looks at the teacher and
>>tells her, "I think Harry can go to the third-grade."
>>
>>The teacher says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions?"
>>The principal and Harry both agree.
>>
>>Teacher: "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?
>>Harry: "Legs"
>>
>>Teacher: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?"
>>(The principal wondered, why does she ask such a question!)
>>Harry: "Pockets"
>>
>>Teacher: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?"
>>Harry: "Pants"
>>
>>Teacher: What's starts with a C and ends with a T, is hairy, oval,
>>delicious and contains thin whitish liquid?" (The principal's eyes
>>open really wide and before he could stop the answer...)
>>Harry: "Coconut"
>>
>>Teacher: "What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and
>>sticky?"
>>Harry: "Bubblegum"
>>
>>Teacher: "What does a man do standing up, a woman do sitting down
>>and a dog do on three legs?"
>>(The principal's eyes open really wide and before he could stop the
>>answer...)
>>Harry: "Shake hands"
>>
>>Teacher: "Now I will ask some '"Who am I" sort of questions, okay?"
>>Harry: "Yup"
>>
>>Teacher: "You stick your poles inside me..... You tie me down to
>>get me up. I get wet before you do"
>>Harry: "Tent"
>>
>>Teacher: "A finger goes in me. You fiddle with me when you're
>>bored. The best man always has me first" (Principal was looking
>>restless and bit tense)
>>Harry: "Wedding Ring"
>>
>>Teacher: "I come in many sizes. When I'm not well, I drip. When you
>>blow me, you feel good"
>>Harry: "Nose"
>>
>>Teacher: "I have a stiff shaft. My tip penetrates. I come with a
>>quiver"
>>Harry: "Arrow"
>>
>>Teacher: "What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a
>>lot of excitement?"
>>Harry: "Firetruck"
>>
>>The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put
>>his ass in the fifth-grade, I got the last ten questions wrong
>>myself

[Tak]

A guy is running late for work, so he's hauling ass on his way to work, in his shiny new BMW, when he sees flashing lights pop up behind him. He gets pulled over, and waits impatiently for the police officer, who takes his sweet time writing out the ticket. Finally, he's free to go, and he pulls into the office parking lot a full hour late.

He walks in the door, and his boss is sitting at his desk waiting. "This is the last time you'll be late at my company - you're fired!"

Furious, the guy cleans out his desk, packs up all his stuff, storms back down to the parking lot, and takes off for home. Angrily muttering to himself, he fails to notice that a light has turned red, goes through the intersection, and gets t-boned by a cement truck, totalling his brand new car.

Two hours later, the guy finally pulls up to his house in a taxi, drags his box of stuff out of the back, pays the driver, and walks into his house, ready to tell his wife what a ****ty day he's had. The first thing he hears, though, is moaning and panting from the bedroom, and he bursts in to find his wife having sex with his best friend!

The guy loses it, grabs his wife, throws her out of the house, still completely naked, and goes around the house in a rage, smashing things, throwing furniture around, and screaming. Finally, he turns to his best friend, who has watched silently the whole time, and says, "Now....as for YOU....."






































BAD DOG!

[Starchaser107]

that's just wrong.

but not as wrong as csn's 26 joke
which i will repeat here for ahem ..."benefit" of those who havent heard.


What the greatest thing about dating 26 year olds



there's 20 of them.

[bodhitree]

Whats the difference between a preist and acne?


Acne doesn't come on your face before your 13

[bodhitree]

How do you get a nun pregnant?



Dress her up like an alter boy