Im kinda ****ed now

[Hieronim]

I am kinda shocked casue I didnt react the way I want to to a confrontation thinking it over and it was totally unexpected and kinda schocking. I was walking to my car from going to some bars or clubs and these two somewhat big dudes were waling across from me. As they passed one of them said "your dressed ina thong" and I right away said "what?" and as I turned to look at them they were giggling histerically like little girls, and as I kept walking and turned my shoulder one of them (not the one that said it) was looking back at me. Thinking it over thats when I should have turned aorund and put one of them in a choke hold for disrespecting me or at least confront them and make thema pologise and shove them a few times to egt the message, or at least say something back instead of hissing a bit and saying what and just looking back. Now in my head I am pumped and want to prove myself and my honor back to myself.

I know I partly didnt react the way I wanted to casue I didnt feel disrespected but trated it as a joke but now realizing one of them was staring back at me it was disrespect no joking. Also this is the second time something like this happened, as once some guys walked by and said something and kept walking and I turned and looked at them and passed without fighting them or confronting them.

Its weird cause something trival at the time and something your thinking in your head as nothing later as you analyze it it becomes a problem, cause small stuff can turn inhto big stuff like later me ignoring people actually talkign real trash or really dissing me which i cant have. The thign is I did react before like at a party whe one guy kept shoving me voer and saying this is my place or other crap and later faking hitting me with a bottle I walked up to and put in a guillotine or another time when i confronted a dude and got into a streetfight by kneeing him in the gut, but for some reason I ddint react this time the way I want to, maybe cause there were two of them and both bigger than me and I got scared, I dont know. Or maybe cause they didnt give me eye contact back right away only after they were a bit far and only the other dude did not the one who said it. I dont know what happened.

[Scott R. Brown]

From my perspective the problem isn’t that you didn’t do anything, it is that you think you should have. You can't go through life punching out everyone who hurts your feelings. If you fee disrespected then the problem is your feelings of insecurity or inadequacy. You did the right thing in the first place by making a joke of it. You are angry because you feel humiliated, but only you can make yourself feel that way by caring what others think. The question is why do you care what they think? “The opinions of worthless people are worthless” -Pers Anthony

The world is full of adults acting like children. You can't avoid them all or get rid of them all by pounding them all into the ground. I used to work in the prison system. Every night I did a perimeter walk. The inmates in the Hole would frequently make insulting comments out their windows when we walked by. This was because we couldn’t identify them. I learned over time to just ignore them or joke back to them. If you can come up with a good retort then it diverts the aggression and ignoring them works too. If you react with anger then they got what they wanted out of you and they win. If you pound them down and they take you to court for winning the fight then you lose too. It is better either ignoring them or keeping some good retorts handy. If your insult is better than theirs then that sometimes shuts them up! Or it may start a fight too, LOL!!

True confidence doesn’t feel the need to degrade others or respond to the antics of children in order to feel worthwhile. Humiliation is how you allow yourself to feel not how others make you feel. The source of the feeling of humiliation comes from inside you not from the words of others. The solution then, is to introspect into your own mind and resolve your feelings of insecurity; this is how you become immune to the insults of others.

[FuXnDajenariht]

This a quote i always try to remember when i feel that need to "defend my honor" swelling up as happens from time to time, but im controlling that desire better.

''Honour is a monstrous moral fiction from the times of scuffle morality. This fiction has survived here and there with an undiminished intensity. Honour is inherited or acquired merit of which anybody can be deprived by anybody else, and the reconquest of which often exacts the blood and life of him who was so easily deprived of it, perhaps by a villain paid to do so. If this fiction had any rational life value, then of course the insulting man, and not the victim of the stupidity or vulgarity, would be the one to “lose his honour”. Anyone who needs to defend his honour, has no honour to defend. Other people’s depreciatory opinions, “offensive” judgements, or similar expressions of hatred, can never degrade the person intended, but only the calumniator. Anyone who wants to be invulnerable, always is so. Honour and violence are a pair of twins so like one another that they have almost always been confused. Might is honour, right, and wisdom. There are many kinds of honour: soldier’s honour of fighting and murder, diplomat’s honour of guile and deceit, money-maker’s honour of usury and exorbitant profits. The whole of history is a temple to honour.'' -Henry T Laurency

[SanHeChuan]

You should never fight at words.

Why were you wearing a thong? I don't get it. Maybe they were taking to each other and looking at you funny for trying to jump into thier conversation. It's all irrelivant anyway, because their is no point in fighting over insults.

[_William_]

You did the right thing. You could have fought but... why? Possible outcomes are

1)You get beaten up, stomped, crippled, killed... over words
2)You end up having to kill, maim, or cripple someone, end up going to jail, end up having to live with the moral consequences and someone's death on your conscience. All over... words.
3)You "win" but they go back and get their buddies, which leads to 1

It can get very, very ugly, very quickly.

The old nursury rhyme! Sticks and stones may break my bones... Words are a stupid and juvenile thing to start an altercation over. Think about it, if you're really secure in yourself you don't have to give a crap about what people say about you. Develop a thick skin.

[jethro]

what is up with your heading? Is it the f word. If it is, then why are you effed. Are these guys coming for you now, did they say they know where you live? There is no point in reacting whatsoever in a situation like that. Even if was a little guy tallking smack, no point If I was with other people I would have said something like your girlfriend makes me wear this thong, but there is really no point in starting a fight, ever.

[Hieronim]

I was by myself and they were both bigger than me but I spar bigger guys all the time so I feel I would have won and the other guy would probably be too chicken to help his friend. ANyway now that Im analyzing the situation I walk back and shvoe the guy in the back and he falls he gets up and starts walking towar dme agressivly do I fight there or keep him away with one hand while shoving him or overwrap his arms or grab one neck and arm and twist him for a rear nakid but again hes bigger so that one would have been hard. I keep analyzing it.

[joedoe]

Don't get into fantasizing over what you would have done. Usually this is nowhere near like what the reality would have been

[Hieronim]

yea it probably would have been an ugly streetfight with cops showing up or me trying to leave while they are following.

[waterleopard]

The number one objective of self defense is to defend your self. It's to live. By not reacting in this situation, you lived.

You know nothing about these two guys other than there were two of them and one of you, and they were both bigger. They could have had knives. They could have had guns. They could have had friends nearby. They could have been marial artists. Or they could have been very adept at street fighting and just looking for someone to react to their nonsense. They might not even have been talking to you and you were just overly sensitive to the situation, or were deceived by their eye contact. You just don't know anything at all about strangers on the street.

You did the right thing by walking away. You successfully practiced self defense against two bigger guys without getting touched. You won.

[Hieronim]

no theyw ere cause one of them was staring back at me over his shoulder. Im also thinking they were drunk, but thats just such a gayc omment to start somiething with.

Ive also been in a similar situation once awhile abck when I was in my moms car and she was getting gas and it was late at night and these two guys were there and I looked at one and didnt mind him but later saw him starring at me like he wanted to kill me and the other one had a beer bottle in his hand, and later they were about to drive off but they drove back right in front of me and stood there liek 5 seconds as I ignored them and looked to the side waiting to see if they start coming out but not giviging eye contact to set it off since my mom was there before they left.

[Dale Dugas]

"since your mom was there..."

train harder and post less crap.

[BM2]

How can you turn what was said into a positive? It is bothering you, what is the real reason for that?
I was walking up to a ATM located inside a grocery store and was late to a football game so I was really in a hurry. As I was just a few feet from it, I stepped aside to allow a guy pushing his cart to leave out the exit. Instead he veered up to the ATM and turned to smirk at me.
Well I was there with my six year old and I didn't want to set a poor example by saying what I was thinking. I stood there while he checked his balance,made his withdraw and took his sweet azz time standing there afterwards.
We arrived just before kickoff and I still hadn't purchased our tickets. This was a arena football game and I was going to get tickets in the upper level. As we were walking up to the window a lady says to her son "They need two tickets." He asked if I needed just two. I replied "Yes, how much?" "They're free" he replied.
As I looked down to see that they were six rows up from the sidelines on the twenty yard line. If that jerk hadn't held me up I would had paid for upper level seats. As it turned out I spent less than half the cost of the tickets for a AFL football. I didn't know at the time but after the game the players would be signing autographs. My son got his ball signed by the quaterback and several players and we threw it around and he had a great time on the field.
Sometimes something good comes out of something that was not.

[Shaolinlueb]

kinda serves you right for wearing a thong

[SevenStar]

I am kinda shocked casue I didnt react the way I want to to a confrontation thinking it over and it was totally unexpected and kinda schocking. I was walking to my car from going to some bars or clubs and these two somewhat big dudes were waling across from me. As they passed one of them said "your dressed ina thong" and I right away said "what?" and as I turned to look at them they were giggling histerically like little girls, and as I kept walking and turned my shoulder one of them (not the one that said it) was looking back at me. Thinking it over thats when I should have turned aorund and put one of them in a choke hold for disrespecting me or at least confront them and make thema pologise and shove them a few times to egt the message, or at least say something back instead of hissing a bit and saying what and just looking back. Now in my head I am pumped and want to prove myself and my honor back to myself.

I know I partly didnt react the way I wanted to casue I didnt feel disrespected but trated it as a joke but now realizing one of them was staring back at me it was disrespect no joking. Also this is the second time something like this happened, as once some guys walked by and said something and kept walking and I turned and looked at them and passed without fighting them or confronting them.

Okay, consider this all the disprespect in the world if you want to, but I don't like you. I think you're an immature little twat. This attitude you have displays it perfectly. This is the attitude that too many people our age and younger have these days, and it's ridiculous. Words are NEVER something to fight over. "mean mugging" is NEVER something to fight over. Stepping on someone's shoe is NEVER something to fight over. What did what they did to you prove? nothing. Who did it hurt? Nobody. Was there any physical threat? No. fuhgetaboutit and move on. Now, had they gotten physical and you did nothing, then you would have something to think about. When you grow up, you will realize how ignorant you were when you were younger.

Here's a wild thought though - maybe you are starting to grow up in someway. Maybe part of you decided that it wasn't worth it, so you kept walking. Then again, this is you we are talking about - you were probably just scared. Either way, you actually managed to do the right thing - you kept on walking.


And for heaven's sake, stop wearing those pink thongs.