No Sex

[Hendrik]

I'm ready to accept Henrik's "2 hours before, 8 hours after" idea as a pretty good rule of thumb. It makes sense and matches my experience.

Here's my new tattoo, hope it doesn't mean "whitey like KFC": 二前八后

if you want to find out the Qigong practice in the western model.

Read

The Interior Castle by St. Teresa of Avila in 1577


It deals with Shen ..... etc cultivation in very details describe it in a different way. So, one really doesnt have to go Daoism or Buddhism or TCM or Confucius way of model. Shen is Shen be it in the east of west.

[IronFist]

What about doing kegels. Can that strengthen your PC muscle so that it's not so tired out after sex?

And how are you guys having sex but not ejaculating? How do you know when you're done? Is it just like, ok baby, you can stop now?

[ShaolinDan]

And how are you guys having sex but not ejaculating? How do you know when you're done? Is it just like, ok baby, you can stop now?

Sometimes it's EXACTLY like that.

[aussie1981]

I wonder where the origins of the sex is bad thing came from, remember the same peole saying sex diminishes your 'life force" also took mercury to lengthen there life span...look how that turned out, Gobledigook iff you ask me. In the western pagan religions sex was celebrated until the good old catholic church took over. Even in Judaism it is considered a good thing to " go forth and multilply".

[rett]

To put this another way, of those who have done these things, what bad things EVER happened from not waiting eight hours? For me, in fifteen years, nothing, not one thing.

I don't think it's a matter of something "bad" happening. It's more related to how to nurture one's qi. Most people don't pay any attention to what happens with the qi when the live a certain way. So if you're paying attention you might notice patterns that can lead to rules of thumb like the above.

I'd think the most important thing is to be aware of it. Then you don't need to be bound by rules the same way, since you understand the whys and hows for yourself.

[rett]

In the western pagan religions sex was celebrated until the good old catholic church took over. Even in Judaism it is considered a good thing to " go forth and multilply".

Sex is healthy but like all other things too much is too much. Just as eating too much is harmful. Depending on your goal, age, health, etc the exact line of how much is too much can vary.

Certain religious practices are also trying to go against the grain of normal life. But these are normally practiced by monastics, so it doesn't really apply to us.

[rett]

Or are you talking about something else?

That's what I was asking about, thanks.

It's interesting but I'm not going to get into that kind of practice. It seems a bit too convoluted to me. I'm in a relationship so I'm just going to live as I live according to the choices I've made. I don't believe we evolved "wrong" and need fixing.

[IronFist]

Sex is healthy but like all other things too much is too much. Just as eating too much is harmful. Depending on your goal, age, health, etc the exact line of how much is too much can vary.

Certain religious practices are also trying to go against the grain of normal life. But these are normally practiced by monastics, so it doesn't really apply to us.

I'm just wondering if one can do qigong (almost) every day and also ejaculate (almost) every day without any problems.

[ShaolinDan]

As long as you're doing your qigong for general benefits and not because you want to open the seven gates, harmonize the flow, and achieve immortality, you will be fine.
Like religion and law, a 'practice' will tend to pick up baggage along the way. 'Course this is all just my opinion, and I'm a layman beginner, so...

[rett]

I'm just wondering if one can do qigong (almost) every day and also ejaculate (almost) every day without any problems.

As ShaolinDan said, what amounts to a problem depends on your goals. Also, an 18-year-old and a 45-year-old may have slightly different physical constraints. Maybe a good rule of thumb is if your legs feel weak when you do forms and stance training, it's too often.

[Taixuquan99]

In the cultivate of Qi, as it is said Dao mimic the natural or Wu Wei Wu Pu Wei or non doing. Control is opposite of Dao mimic the natural and Wu Wei.

In practice, I agree, perhaps control was the wrong word to use. I will say that, to learn it, many begin by controlling, and after time, start to see where what they are doing by control occurs naturally, and, at that point, cease to fight it.

What state has your Qigong reaches?

Currently, Kansas.

What has been said?

On numerous occasions, that book says that, once one can move the energy, not only is there no problem in moving it while doing other things, but that one should do so.

if you want to find out the Qigong practice in the western model.

Read

The Interior Castle by St. Teresa of Avila in 1577


It deals with Shen ..... etc cultivation in very details describe it in a different way. So, one really doesnt have to go Daoism or Buddhism or TCM or Confucius way of model. Shen is Shen be it in the east of west.

That's not really true. The spiritual goals of the two traditions alter the goals of the practice. Doing the same practice with different intent will change the practice. Accepting the tao, accepting the buddhist transience of existence, and accepting the world as the punishment of God, are three entirely different things, and make for subtle differences in the intent of the practice.

What about doing kegels. Can that strengthen your PC muscle so that it's not so tired out after sex?

Doing kegels can improve performance and functioning in similar ways, since both involve movement of the PC. That said, a lot of qigong actually involves more subtle movement of the PC, seeking a circular, as opposed to up and down, movement, which adds additional ability to respond to orgasm response. It's essentially a form of kegel, but a more involved one.

And how are you guys having sex but not ejaculating? How do you know when you're done? Is it just like, ok baby, you can stop now?

When it is natural to be done, you're done. When it's the perfect time to come, you come. It's hard in text to explain how to "avoid" ejaculation, I posted a bit of it before.

Essentially, the orgasm is keyed by the upstroke of a kegel contraction, if one gets stuck in that upstroke, or if one is choosing to come, then you come. If, by recognizing the capacity of the body to move the contractions in a circular motion that tends to move smoothly from upstroke to downstroke, and by awareness that the upstroke that causes you to come just as easily may lead swiftly to a series of kegel circles that dissipate the tension leading to ejaculation, and the timing of doing so, one can avoid coming. Since the upstroke that might cause you to come is part of the orgasm, and since the more of these upstrokes you experience in a session means you experience more of that portion of the orgasm(namely, the part so great that you might come), you can experience a sort of repeated partial orgasm.

Sometimes it's EXACTLY like that.

Exactly.

I wonder where the origins of the sex is bad thing came from, remember the same peole saying sex diminishes your 'life force" also took mercury to lengthen there life span...look how that turned out, Gobledigook iff you ask me. In the western pagan religions sex was celebrated until the good old catholic church took over. Even in Judaism it is considered a good thing to " go forth and multilply".

I agree with you on this.

I don't think it's a matter of something "bad" happening. It's more related to how to nurture one's qi. Most people don't pay any attention to what happens with the qi when the live a certain way. So if you're paying attention you might notice patterns that can lead to rules of thumb like the above.

But when there ARE traditions that recognize sex as qigong, such rules may not be the final word.

Certainly, if I do an internal set a lot, intensely, I probably won't jump right into sex, but it's for the same reason I didn't do more of that internal set, because I've done all I should do. After I do enough push ups, I also don't do more, but I don't blame push ups for that.(Not saying you are)

I'd think the most important thing is to be aware of it. Then you don't need to be bound by rules the same way, since you understand the whys and hows for yourself.

I am in total agreement with this statement.

That's what I was asking about, thanks.

No problem, I wasn't sure.

It's interesting but I'm not going to get into that kind of practice. It seems a bit too convoluted to me. I'm in a relationship so I'm just going to live as I live according to the choices I've made. I don't believe we evolved "wrong" and need fixing.

I don't think we do, either. I think, at its best, the practice is making ourselves aware of how we are evolved. And there are definitely things about the practice that can become convoluted. A lot of people get in hang-ups about "Well, this says I should do this hundred strokes, and then this hundred different. et al." Then they become detached from what they're actually doing. If you pay attention, obviously your partner's body will cue you in on exactly what is perfect to do at that time. You can't overlay a diagram on it all. If it's not communicative, and about the sex, not about your actualizing some esoteric practice, it's not esoteric or a good practice, imo.

The main advantage of it is that, as you age, if you do sex like you did when you were younger, you will be pretty much guaranteed to have less sexual capacity. If you match your body's ability as it changes, you maintain capacity without decrease in drive at each moment, but it's not like it's the most important thing, or of the same importance for each couple, and it, like everything else ever brought forward claiming to do so, does not make you a superior person.

I'm just wondering if one can do qigong (almost) every day and also ejaculate (almost) every day without any problems.

One problem is that you will exhaust the PC, and one or both practices will be less for trying to work an exhausted muscle. Can you benchpress and benchpress again every day to exhaustion and not have problems?

As long as you're doing your qigong for general benefits and not because you want to open the seven gates, harmonize the flow, and achieve immortality, you will be fine.
Like religion and law, a 'practice' will tend to pick up baggage along the way. 'Course this is all just my opinion, and I'm a layman beginner, so...

Again, totally agree. When a practice's tradition gives a certain number or effect, it is assumed that different people do not all conform to that number, but the number becomes written in stone.

As ShaolinDan said, what amounts to a problem depends on your goals. Also, an 18-year-old and a 45-year-old may have slightly different physical constraints. Maybe a good rule of thumb is if your legs feel weak when you do forms and stance training, it's too often.

I agree.

So, we are agreed that sexual activity without ejaculation does not constitute a harm?

[rett]

So, we are agreed that sexual activity without ejaculation does not constitute a harm?

I've never tried it so I can't answer. But I don't actively disagree

[extrajoseph]

So, we are agreed that sexual activity without ejaculation does not constitute a harm?

I hope this is not written in stone, because in some cases the woman do want the man to come and to deny her this mutual pleasure is not "ziran" 自然 and could harm the relationship even though it might not harm the body. The ultimate in practice is to let go (emptiness 虚). 《炼精化气，炼气化神，炼神返虚》(自然同化為虚).

[Taixuquan99]

I hope this is not written in stone, because in some cases the woman do want the man to come and to deny her this mutual pleasure is not "ziran" 自然 and could harm the relationship even though it might not harm the body. The ultimate in practice is to let go (emptiness 虚). 《炼精化气，炼气化神，炼神返虚》(自然同化為虚).

Oh, I agree, never give your woman her due, and you will have an unhappy circumstance.

That said, if you both want to do it regularly, that might mean that you will not finish some of the time, since she doesn't have the same limits as you.

[extrajoseph]

A woman can come and come and come and come, it is the man who is limited.