And I'm not talking about a tranny putting a roofie in your drink

I have decided to begin training for MMA again, and went to the school to get some striking drills in. We share our school with a "combatives" type of style. They are leaving soon, as (good for them!) they have outgrown the space they occupy. Sometimes, I know, they spar. I've seen it. I saw them gloving up, and, having been invited in before, figured maybe I could get a little time in.

I asked "Oh, hey, are you sparring?"

"Yeah, some kicking! Come on in!"

Maybe I should have clarified what that meant. But, what this actually meant was kicking drills and some "self-defense" type stuff. They didn't spar. Well and good, but not what I am training for. Ok, figured I. Mea culpa for not checking. But now I'm in it, and I can't very well withdraw. That would be impolite.

Now, part of this was to execute the initial part of the technique series (heavy on groin shots and elbows to the head, etc.), then finish "however you wanted." So, I used my strength - grappling. This being a self-defense situation, I used takedowns and throws that left me standing at completion, with my opponent mostly or preferably under the knee-on-belly position, which I believe is optimal for ass-kicking and mobility.

"Ok, good, good."

So, I go through, training with my partners. About 30 seconds later, he calls everybody together, highlights my grappling experience, then asks me to do to him what I had just done to my partners. OK, no problem. I dump him, and place him in knee on belly. To clarify, this was not a bent over, "looking for mount" type of knee on belly. It was an upright, "ready to punch/kick/run" type of knee on belly - one geared towards my own mobility, rather than immobilizing my opponent.

"Finish," he says

"Ok, like, um, how do you want me to do this," I'm thinking because this isn't MY game, it's not MY class, and I'm here, even if disinterested at this point, politely and not to disrupt anything. He must have seen that moment of thought run over my face.

"Finish like you would, you know?"

Well, alright, thinks I. I already had his arm pulled way way up and secured into my stomach. I had gone nowhere NEAR armbar, because, typically, that's not what I was trained to do in a "self-defense" situation. But, I viewed his comment as a command/invitation to execute a jointlock.

While applying said jointlock carefully - on him, the non-grappling-experienced person-so-I-don't-hurt-him - the ****er pulls out a rubber knife and proceeds to start slashing me with it. Yeah, well, no ****...why dya think I was in knee on belly and not doing an armbar in the first place?! I want to be in a position to see what's coming, or to disengage while kicking you etc, especially if I find out you have a weapon! We were then treated to a two minute thesis on "not wanting to develop a relationship with the guy via grappling, throwing etc"

In essence, he used me as an example to his students about what was wrong with grappling (writ large, to include throws and slamming takedowns that leave you standing) and why what they were doing was "better." Completely disrespectful, in my mind, and not something I would ever do to somebody else.

It took awhile for it to sink in, what had just occurred. I was most ****ed because he's always been pretty cool, and I thought he was a better person than that. Why did he do that? There was no reason to. If that was something he wanted to leap on as an opportunity, (ie, there's an experienced grappler here today, let's take some advantage of grappling do's and don'ts, figure out what to do, etc, here, let me stab you with a rubber knife!!!) I would have been MORE than happy to oblige!

While I was most disappointed with him, I then had to deal with:

a series of smug, irritating follow-ups from one of his students, without being allowed to put him through the wall

the contradictory logic of some of the things spouting from another - for instance, a thumb gouge to the spot where the clavicles meet was used to try and get an attacker to go backwards. I missed at one point, and so resorted to an old wrestler's trick of pulling on the collarbone....which caused him to bend over, which meant I could move him since he was off balance. I then received a lecture on how what I had just done was "pain compliance...." Uh, and sticking your thumb in that spot isn't? Never mind that the collarbone thing was actually bio-mechanical (trying to get the weight forward or back so I can move him. The collarbone is a nice handle I can MOVE you with, for just a second, which opens up my counters, regardless of your pain level. ) But I digress...

I did however, enjoy the little irony that during 2 attacker on 1 drills two things we were told "this is not a boxing match" and the above treatise on grappling, were precisely the two things that stymied his students. My boxing footwork kept me at the exits, caused them to bump into each other, etc, and my grappling allowed me to move people into each other and such. I mentioned to smug boy (as part of a conversation he insisted on having) - well, I was staying near the door and he said "Well, what if you trip and fall on the railing?" I said "what if I get hit by a bus?"

He didn't get it.

Finally, at the end of it all, a well-meaning guy I like came over and started basically telling me all about the point of the combatives, and it was different, designed for the street where we assume the other person doesn't know anything (why this assumption, I don't know...) etc, and I waved him off and said:

"Look, I suffer no illusions that what I do is a sport. That's it. It's not self-defense. It's not training for "the street." We can all play what-if games all day - it will always be possible to come up with something or a scenario that puts you on the receiving end of an ass whooping. The biggest skill I take away from BJJ is this - there is only a VERY small percentage of the population that can KEEP me on the ground, and I know that mobility is going to be crucial to survival."

He paused for a second and said "Well, you know there is one person who can keep you on the ground - you. You can keep yourself there, if you aren't careful."

Easily the only valuable point of what was otherwise an unrecoverable hour.

I'm not ****ed off any more, but I am disappointed in that instructor. I always thought he was a better guy than to do something like that. It was, in my mind, a blatantly disrespectful thing to do.