LKFMDC to source all 385 forum memberships to India

[KC Elbows]

In an effort to cut costs, Gene Ching, CFO of Trolling, Inc. has declared that the popular and controversial handle LKFMDC is being outsourced to India.

"It's really a matter of dollars and cents. We'd used Coach Ross for years to manage our vast array of online trolls and trademarked glorified kickboxers, but we found the return was getting to be much less than the cost; not just for salary, but for all the young Asian booty and dim sum costs associated. Few members realized that for every flamewar, we were having to provide baijiu and steamed buns; even the low cost doctored photos of members was adding up."

Despite Ching's explanation, Coach Ross has countered, saying costs had little to do with it.

"Gene was angry over some promotional pics I put up of him from his book tour. He seemed to think those were private pics between him and I, while I assumed they were to be used to plug the book and his high end line of shaolin skin cream. It's all a big misunderstanding, but instead of dealing with me directly, he does this. I'm really saddened by the way this went, I thought those pictures really showed how well the skin cream whitened one's skin, it contrasted so well with his book."

Members of the popular kungfu forum had mixed opinions.

"I thought the new LKFMDC was much more polite than the old one. I mean, why should Gene pay for Ross's posh New York lifestyle, and really, everyone prefers Bawang nowadays, anyway," said one member.

Other members had different views. "I'm posting, and I see LKFMDC post 'You kung fu its not real, Chan Tai San showered me good kung fu, then beat up a stupid guys who had a dogss face, LOL.' I mean, is that even English? And don't even get me started on the pics: they're clearly pics cut with scissors and scanned in. I'm dissappointed."

To get to the heart of the matter, we contacted long time member Knifefighter, with whom we had this exchange:

Interviewer: Knifefighter, it's nice to have you here.

Knifefighter: That's because you are a theoretical non-fighter applying theory based around dance.

Interviewer: I'm sorry, I don't understand where you're coming from on that?

Knifefighter: If you didn't do form, you probably would.

Interviewer: Okay. Um...what is it you miss most about the old LKFMDC?

Knifefighter: His constant adherence to a respectful debating style.

Insiders have suggested that the outsourcing of these memberships may have deeper economic reasoning.

"It's clear that with the problems in Mexico, the nacho cheese supply is not flowing as constantly as before. On top of that, the cost of finding an actual ninjette, not a portly woman doing kempo and calling it ninjutsu, well, it's staggering," said Drake.

"That's stupid," member BJJ-Blue counters. "First, link? Second, it's Obama's fault for making the cost of doing a decent nacho cheese combine in the states prohibitively high, and don't even get me started on how Democrats act like they're fighting for immigrants while making it harder and harder for hard working ninjettes who would actually seek legal residency to get it, while giving a free ride to CRIMINALS who just want to live on my dollar and eat my nacho cheese."

[TenTigers]

KC-you missed your calling. You should be a writer. Seriously, there is a strong need for people with eloquent writing skills, such as IKEA...oh, and Bawang.

[SPJ]

supply and demand globaly

labor goes to cheaper country to keep cost and inflation down

10 $ shirt for 30 years

not bad

made in taiwan

made in hongkong

made in china

-----

[KC Elbows]

KC-you missed your calling. You should be a writer. Seriously, there is a strong need for people with eloquent writing skills, such as IKEA...oh, and Bawang.

My spellin cheeker is based aruond Bawangese.

[SPJ]

I recently bought tai chi sword and wu shu sword from martial arts mart.

my old swords were totally worn and damaged.

they are made in china and very well made. they are wushu grade or performance grade.

they both are light to handle, since i am used to heavy metal swords.

all my moves are faster and lighter.

wow feel like superman

---

outsourcing good.

there are so many thai and philipino workers in taiwan

supply and demand

---

[GeneChing]

...I got to score this one to SPJ.

Shaolin skin cream indeed. I got your Shaolin skin cream right here, KC.

[mooyingmantis]

KC Elbows,
Very Enjoyable! Thanks for the laugh!

[KC Elbows]

I got your Shaolin skin cream right here, KC.

Always with the aggressive marketing!

[lkfmdc]

Kind sir, welcome and thank you! We are very happy to be here, kind sir, on this most amazing and brilliant web posting board. Yes, indeed, this board is quite the best....

[GeneChing]

Aggressive marketing? Who me?

[lkfmdc]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n87j-oAa_ek

[taai gihk yahn]

In a developing legal dispute, objections regarding the recent proposed outsourcing of the LKFMDC branding have been raised by a class-action suit filed in a Lower Manhattan Federal District Court this morning, asking for an injunction barring the maneuver.

A spokesman for the plaintiff's attorneys summarized their perspective as follows:
"We have some very serious concerns about this shift in platform. The LKFMDC branding is not simply a single account that, once outsourced, would have very little impact on the overall viability of KFMF. In fact, we have reason to assert that in fact the LKFMDC label is one of several hundred multiple-poster accounts. Off-loading this bundle would not only fundamentally shift the membership base demographics, it would also impede our client's ability to regularly reference this fact as a means of diverting attention from his own inflammatory posting style."
When asked to identify himself for the record, the spokesman archly responded that only a glorified kick-boxer with no experience in authentic TCMAs would need to ask such a knuckleheaded question.

Inside the courtroom, the mood was no less plodding and, in fact, pretty grim, already. In a prepared statement, the defendants (including parent company Asian Nacho Cheese Industries) cited legal precedent dating back as far as the Magna Carta for the outsourcing of curd-based industries, noting that, "if the cheese stinks, spread it around", evoking snigers, chortles and muffled cries of "Viva la revolucion" from the back of the court, and eliciting a snarl-like smirk from the left side of presiding Judge David Jamieson's mouth, who noted, "I may hail from environs somewhat northerly from you fabled nacho-cheese producers, but if I see a pic of a comely dame, I like to drink a sub-standard beer and coat her in a soft curd myself." He then inexplicably directed insulting gestures towards the gallery, calling all and sundry a bunch of "hypocritical, namby-pamby pantywaists who should look after their own vaginas before shaving someone else's". While no one was really able to get a handle on the point of this statement, it was clear that there was no easy end in sight for this nigh-byzantine courtroom drama.

Analysts differ on the potential fall-out of any decision in this case.

Noted misogynist and cross-trainer Sanjuro Ronin, speaking on behalf of both the graphic arts and dairy industry, noted, "I think that it's about time. If you consider the amount of bandwidth allocated on a daily basis for LKFMDC substrates, it drastically impedes the uploading of giffs and jpegs of scantly clad wenches reveling in Nacho Cheese products."

From a dissenting perspective, local seismologist and mother of three Scott R. Brown intoned, "What? Are you joking? David Ross is LKFMDC? I thot that he was me, ME, MEEEEE! Hee he heeeeee!", as he ran off to wrestle a velociraptor and swim 100 laps.

One passer-by, who claimed to have been following the proceedings remotely, stated that, "It make me cry-tears sad, watching white devil peepul try to abuse the roots of true nacho cheese making; old days time u had one peece of yur cheese at a time, not all flowed together like incontinent nursing-home resident's poopies; dats why I training to be trong and hairy so one day I will avenge the nacho ninjettes who wrote secret Nacho Cheese Manly-ul back in Badabing Dynasty."

WIth deliberations lasting well into the dusk, no verdict has as yet been reached. However, a panel of experts is expected to convene to discuss the matter in detail, that is, if mommy will let them stay up past their bedtimes and make them a nice mug of warm chocolate...

[goju]

Aggressive marketing? Who me?

Curse gene and his buttery soft skin! That is how he he got Gina carano to talk to him.

[GeneChing]

Shaolin skin cream. Infused with the qi of Shaolin monks (note: Shaolin skin cream is produced on equipment that also processes nuts, soy, and the occasional fake monk).

[goju]

Note how the waists are not touching in the pic, pointing to it being a sympathy hug