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Thread: Tiger Mothers and FOB Moms

  1. #16
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    Tiger Pop

    It should be noted that Chua and Rubenfeld are very successful people and are capitalizing on the buzz very well.
    Tiger Mom's husband: I agree with 99% of her parenting

    The media continues to churn out stories about Amy Chua, aka Tiger Mom. It has been four weeks since the Wall Street Journal ran an excerpt of Chua's widely discussed book Battle Hymn of a Tiger Mom, and ever since the world has been subjected to nonstop Tiger Mom news.

    This morning, Chua's husband Jed Rubenfeld appeared on Good Morning America. The Yale law professor said, "The last few months have been tough on the family yet her book has sparked an international conversation and that's tremendous."

    Rubenfeld also backed his wife's strict parenting style: "99% of the time absolutely I agreed with it, because as I was saying for me these were traditional American values, not Asian," he said. "So yes, I was on board with it."

    As for the time Chua called one of their daughters "garbage," Rubenfeld called that "overblown."

    "Is there any parent that you know who wouldn't want to have a do-over, one do-over for something that they said to their kids that they wish they hadn't? Rubenfeld said. "You know I give her credit for her honesty."

    Rubenfeld is also an author and he spends the last half of the segment talking about his latest work, The Death Instinct. It seems Tiger Mom and Tiger Dad know how to use the media to sell books...
    Gene Ching
    Publisher www.KungFuMagazine.com
    Author of Shaolin Trips
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  2. #17
    i hope she can take the weight of whats comming thru the door she opened... i think its a needed convo... cultural standards of exellence need to be on par if we want any sort of equality... i bet she didnt see that commin tho... good for her anyways, i hope she gets thru it... all the cash will help... i mean, thats part of her goal right? get paid, make her kids prosper....

  3. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by Syn7 View Post
    *snip* i mean, thats part of her goal right? get paid, make her kids prosper....
    If this were her goal, my opinion would be that she has failed.

    The great success stories in the world do not often come from those people who have inherited their parents wealth and more often come from people who start with little or nothing but a will to strive for success.

    In short, the second line of my signature below.
    Kung Fu is good for you.

  4. #19
    yeah but if they were struggling financially and both parents were working 24/7 then she wouldnt have the time to spend being a mom, tiger or otherwise... thats what im saying... its my understanding that success for the tiger mom is more than monetary... she wants her kids to be "better" than what im sure she views as the competition.... in all aspects... piano violin math whatever... whatevr path she lays out for them she wants them to do it perfectly... im i misunderstanding the situation??? i dont have a tiger mom, but ive met a few...

    In short, the second line of my signature below.
    when i was your age i had to walk 40 miles in the snow, uphill both ways, naked, just to get to school... and that was only till grade four, after that we had to work the farm 23 hours a day with no food or water... you young kids just dont appreciate the value of what you have!!!



    thats the curse of wealth, statistically your children have a 65% greater chance of become a complete fukctard...
    Last edited by Syn7; 01-31-2011 at 06:38 PM.

  5. #20
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    Jamaican Tiger Mom

    Donna Marie Williams
    Posted: January 26, 2011 03:48 PM
    A Black Mother's Response to Amy Chua: We're Tiger Moms, Too

    Amy Chua, author of the suddenly infamous Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother, has been under fire lately. Press reviews and online comments have condemned her parenting skills as abusive and counterproductive, though the harshest criticisms have come from other mothers. Even Chinese mothers have distanced themselves from her, insisting that their views resonate more with the Western style of parenting.

    My sisters and I actually agree with much -- though not all -- of Chua's approach. To varying degrees, we're tiger moms who were raised by a tiger mom -- who happened to be Jamaican. Chua believes that immigrants tend to be tough on their kids because they want to prepare them to take advantage of opportunities. That was surely the case in our family.

    We were never abused, and we don't abuse our children, but our expectations are extremely high. Some judgmental mommies might say we're "over the top."

    We depart company with Chua in that we allow our children their good friendships, sleepovers and other fun activities. My sisters don't know this yet, but eventually kids will rebel. As they get older, they'll break your heart ("After all that money I spent on lessons and you want to be a what? Oy!"). But providing balance will hopefully minimize the impact of World War III.

    In our family, self-esteem is earned, not handed out like potato chips. Our girls have no choice: they must practice their music sometimes as long as 3 or 4 hours per day (longer if concerts and competitions are coming up). On top of their music studies, practices and performances, they must do their homework, study for tests, write papers and create science fair projects just like any other student.

    If they do well, we praise. If they fail (which they do -- no one's perfect), they hear the truth from us, and we don't sugarcoat. That's not abusive. It's a gift. They may not like it, but they've learned how to use criticism to improve.

    As a result, 2 of our daughters placed 1st and 2nd in a Korean music competition this year. This is routine for them. They're like the Venus and Serena of strings. My daughter, the cellist, recently placed 2nd in a pageant and was noted by her college president in his blog. The 3 cousins, also known as SugarStrings, were recently featured on an NBC Nightly News with Brian Williams segment for inspiring young children with their musical performances.

    Bottom line: to perform like an Olympian, you must train like an Olympian. Why is it that parents of elite athletes are revered as martyrs while Chua is soundly denounced for basically raising her girls the same way? If you talked to parents of Olympic athletes you'd be shocked at their grueling schedules and tough parenting styles.

    You'd also be shocked at the tremendous joy children experience when they master a skill. Not only that, they get to enjoy it early in life. They can do so much with the skill and the discipline it took to master it, and they have this relentless, rigorous parenting style to thank.

    Chua's book got me thinking about not only parenting in my family, but the power of books to stimulate debate and change society.

    When I last checked (1/26/11, 11:30 CST), Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother was #4 on Amazon because of the raging controversy. Chua's book has created a new national dialogue about parenting and the global competitiveness of our children.

    Amidst the recent onslaught of celebrity books and just as I was beginning to wonder about the ability of our industry to produce stimulating, thought-provoking books, this roaring book on parenting comes along. Books will never go the way of Fahrenheit 451, thank God. Publishing formats may be changing, but books are here to stay. They still have the power to make us think, to facilitate change.

    Amy Chua probably had no idea that her book would cause such a ruckus, and if she had known she might have written another book. She should be applauded for putting her story out there.
    I hear what you're saying, Syn7. In China, if you're poor, you don't get the opportunities to even take violin or piano. But the parents might still demand the world of you. It's a privilege to get an education in China, not a right. It's also a result of Confucianism, IMO.
    Gene Ching
    Publisher www.KungFuMagazine.com
    Author of Shaolin Trips
    Support our forum by getting your gear at MartialArtSmart

  6. #21
    word... i think that goes a long way in explaining why parents push so hard in the west... because they do have more of those opportunities and she isnt gonna let any of those opportunities slip by... but thats not the only reason, otherwise you would have the same actions from all peoples comming from poor backgrounds in other nations...

  7. #22
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    Slate's comment

    Shoot, now I'm thinking we should do a tiger mom article, just to coattail on the press. I'm sure I can find a tiger mom stage parent. In fact, a few come to mind immediately. The question is if they would participate in the dialog....hmmm....
    Mary Gates and Karen Zuckerberg Weren't Tiger Moms
    Is the Amy Chua approach bad for the American economy?

    By Ray FismanPosted Wednesday, Feb. 9, 2011, at 1:38 PM ET

    Mark Zuckerberg and Amy Chua. Click image to expand.Mark Zuckerberg and Amy ChuaAmy Chua's "tiger mom" approach to childrearing has become a national topic of discussion bordering on obsession. She has clearly tapped into deep-seated anxieties among American parents and educators about the country's children increasingly slipping behind their counterparts in the rising economic giants of the East. The Tiger Mother phenomenon came on the heels of global math and science results that put Chinese students (or, at least, the ones who had migrated to Shanghai) well ahead of the rest of the world, with America's misdirected youth firmly buried in the bottom half. It's easy to imagine that soon the tables of the global economy will be turned, with innumerate Americans working for pennies an hour on assembly lines producing next-generation iPhones designed by Chinese eggheads. The theme was even picked up by President Obama in his State of the Union call to reinvigorate American global competitiveness.

    While we shouldn't excuse the dismal showing of U.S. high school students in math and science, we may also not want to push America's next generation to compete head-on with the tiger children of the East. We may be wiser to celebrate the aspects of American culture and education—promoting free-thinking and creativity over rote memorization—that are well-suited to America's current place in the global economy. Let China—with its armies of flawless test-takers—produce automobiles and computer chips with error-free precision; we'll focus on generating a few revolutionary ideas to ensure the next iPhone or Facebook is conceived and designed in America.

    One of the basic insights of modern economics is that countries are better off focusing on producing whatever it is that they do relatively well—their so-called comparative advantage. So, for example, if the United States has a particular knack for producing Hollywood entertainment, we'd do well to focus on exporting blockbusters and use the proceeds to buy T-shirts, sneakers, and food.
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    It turns out, though, that global trade isn't simply a matter of poor countries sending iron ore and plastic toys to rich nations to be exchanged for supercomputers and action movies. Rich countries trade a lot with other rich countries. Some years ago, Gene Grossman and Giovanni Maggi, a pair of international economists, came up with a clever explanation for at least some of this trade between countries that would seem to have similar skills for producing sophisticated goods. If we buy their story, it may have implications for what the United States should take as its priorities in keeping its competitive edge.

    Their insight comes from the observation that for some goods—like automobiles and semiconductors—the value of the final product can be undermined by any problem in the design process or along the production line. One poorly designed or installed brake pedal, and the whole package is worth a lot less than that of your error-free competitors. Economists refer to this kind of production—where the value of what's being produced is undermined by one weak link—as O-ring production, in reference to the space shuttle Challenger, which exploded 25 years ago as a result of the failure of one seemingly irrelevant O-ring seal in its rocket booster.

    But in other industries, it doesn't matter how many mistakes you've made in experimenting with new ideas as long as someone has an "aha" moment now and again. Pharmaceutical companies, for example, are always looking for the next blockbuster drug that will emerge amid thousands of failed attempts.

    The authors argue that precision-minded societies—like Germany, Japan, and, increasingly, China—have a relative advantage in churning out identical copies of well-engineered products. They produce armies of well-trained technicians and scientists well-suited to O-ring design and production.

    By contrast, the U.S. contributes to the global economy goods that require a few talented people and their bright ideas—we excel in areas like software design, drug development, and financial services, which we trade to the Germans, Japanese, and Chinese for automobiles and computer chips. (Foreigners may no longer appreciate our genius for financial innovation, given the supposedly risk-free mortgage-backed investments that American bankers passed off onto German bankers and Taiwanese insurance companies, investments that turned out to be worthless.)

    Aspects of our education system—the progressive-education movement; the science-fair tradition—may in fact be well-suited to producing the labor force that will allow us to continue to compete on this basis. And even Amy Chua describes her approach to learning as joyless and focused single-mindedly on rote repetition and memorization at the expense of free-thinking creative development. The debate on the future of American education reflects this tension between teaching basic skills that generate higher test scores and fostering the blue-sky creativity that wins science fairs and creates great scientists. Indeed, some blame our increasing obsession with test results for an equally alarming decline in creativity.

    This point was picked up by Larry Summers—hardly known as lackadaisical in personality or parenting style—who pointed out in a debate with Chua at Davos that if Karen Zuckerberg and Mary Gates had been tiger moms, they never would have let young Mark or Bill leave Harvard to pursue their entrepreneurial dreams, and we might not have Facebook or Microsoft (though America would probably have two more very competent dentists or lawyers).

    Of course, it's hard to invent Facebook or design the iPhone without developing sound foundations in math and science, the kind of preparation that Gates, Zuckerberg, and others born to privilege receive in America's elite private schools. The dismal showing of American students in international tests implies that we're limiting the pool of possible innovators by failing to provide this training to most children.

    It also doesn't mean that tiger moms should be any more forgiving in strict violin practice schedules or demands for A+'s in everything (except gym and art): That depends on whether they're willing to give up stronger prospects of Ivy League acceptance for the long shot of producing the next Bill Gates. But for the American economy to exploit its relative advantages fully, we may in fact be better off with a few more easygoing parents and fewer tiger moms.
    Gene Ching
    Publisher www.KungFuMagazine.com
    Author of Shaolin Trips
    Support our forum by getting your gear at MartialArtSmart

  8. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by David Jamieson View Post
    If this were her goal, my opinion would be that she has failed.

    The great success stories in the world do not often come from those people who have inherited their parents wealth and more often come from people who start with little or nothing but a will to strive for success.

    In short, the second line of my signature below.
    Do you have kids?

  9. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kansuke View Post
    Do you have kids?
    get a life pos troll
    Kung Fu is good for you.

  10. #25
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    Was that a yes or a no? Don't be shy.

  11. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kansuke View Post
    Was that a yes or a no? Don't be shy.
    That's a GFY for you chubs.
    Kung Fu is good for you.

  12. #27
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    Is there a specific reason you are afraid to answer a simple question?

  13. #28
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kansuke View Post
    Is there a specific reason you are afraid to answer a simple question?
    gonna put ya on ignore now maggot. bye bye.
    Kung Fu is good for you.

  14. #29
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    Who would have thought such a simple question would be the one to push him over the edge?

  15. #30
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    A lot of insults too. Curious.

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