Need advice on a serious matter.

[bawang]

or maybe he likes making a lot of money. id do it if i can make 100k a year taeching little kids and empty eyed 40 year olds to prance around limply.

[GeneChing]

And don't decide until after your knee surgery. That could be a game-changer.

We'll chat more about this soon, I'm sure.

[rett]

All the good advice about don't burn bridges, don't commit too early, save face all around, if you do gotta go just ramble on and dump no guilt trips, all that sounds good. Also, if you do leave, try to go back for a social visit once in a while.

[lkfmdc]

People open up martial arts schools thinking they are following their dreams. Frequently they find that it has turned into a nightmare. You struggle everyday to pay your bills, your friends and family tell you that you are wasting your time and your money, many instructors have found themselves in debt

Right now, if you turn to ANY of the organizations that offer business advice to martial arts school owners you will be told to "dumb down" what you are doing, NOT to make people work to hard and be buried in a wide variety of "schemes" designed supposedly to produce more income

Now back to reality. An instructor can NOT teach every class. And frankly, you don't want him to. He'll be burnt out and of no use.

So you DO need assistant instructors

In my school, 50% of them are "black belts" who have been with me for YEARS. The other 50% are also pretty advanced people (mostly fighters)

But in some cases, you have to realize that those people may not exist in a realitively new school. So you get what you can.

Again, the "mainstream" martial arts business "professionals" will tell you that any damned fool can teach... that is the state of the industry

I personally prefer to have a "black belt" class or advanced only classes for those who teach classes for me. Since they teach they need extra classes to make up for it

If the transition to "new full time school" is pretty recent, you have to give the guy time to come to grips with things. YOu may also have to realize that just becuase YOU want discipline and hard training doesn't mean many of the other students want the same. Train yourslef hard and don't worry about the rest

[David Jamieson]

I think it would be in your best interest to be forthright about how you feel and to lay out your next steps, which will be surgery and moving on from your sifus club because it has become too commercial for your tastes.

If this angers him, there's nothing you can do about that.

Using "excuses" is a weasel move. Stand up, say your piece and if you cannot resolve, move on. You're both grown ups and it's not like a breakup.

If the relationship can't withstand that, then it probably wasn't going to be a source for you anymore anyway.

Also, you've been there long enough now that it would surprising if the law of diminishing returns hasn't kicked in with you yet.

Bottom line is that eventually you have to wear your kung fu. Making excuses and dancing around is NOT having Kung Fu. Saying what you feel is the trut of the matter IS having Kung Fu.

Just an observation. be honest, be forthright, speak, act.

(in my opinion, if you don't do this you will demonstrate you have learned nothing)

I apologize if that's harsh for you and you need more time, but when I finally decided to sh1t as opposed to staying on the pot, I did and it made huge changes for the better.

[Lokhopkuen]

Prolly a foregone concept
I've been with the same teacher since 1979 through thick and thin.

[bawang]

honor is more important than loyalty

[Taixuquan99]

Not being there, it's hard to judge. Are the black belts less qualified than you were at that stage, and are you judging this on fair criteria?

[taai gihk yahn]

Prolly a foregone concept
I've been with the same teacher since 1979 through thick and thin.

this may hold true for you, but that doesn't mean you can apply it across the board (especially not in such a smug, sarcastic manner - altho that is your typical m.o. for posting, I will concur, so perhaps you have difficulty expressing yourself in more socially appropriate manner; but whatever, even tho it's the new and improved form, I guess some are just unable to catch that vibe)

well, it's a two-way street: if you are loyal to your teacher, he should be loyal to you; if he is not taking care of you the way a "teaching father" should, than you are under no obligation at all; maybe your sifu did that, through :thick and thin" and if he did, then you are correct in playing the loyalty card, because it was reciprocated; but in this case, the sifu has clearly put his business in front of his student's ontological well-being - which is fine, of course, it's his livelyhood; but at the same time, this basically absolves the student's responsibility to do the same;

when your teacher's actions put you at risk in a way that demonstrates lack of concern on their part, you have every right to leave, and you are an idiot if you don't;

[Darthlawyer]

A piece of advice that a friend once gave me in a completely different situation is this:

"Discuss the problem, then wait 90 days to see if there is any change. If you still want out then, your decision should be made."

This advice was given to me in the case of an employment situation, but I've used in in relationships (romantic, friendly, and professional). It provides an opportunity for change, but keeps me from hanging on needlessly to a bad situation. If you have already had a discussion, it may be time to branch out.

One thing I would consider, if your most important point is your martial development is this: when was the last time that your instructor really helped you increase your ability?

You don't have to be a babysitter for all the other students. If they like the level of challenge, they will stay, if not, they can leave. You are responsible for yourself.

[omarthefish]

Now back to reality. An instructor can NOT teach every class. And frankly, you don't want him to. He'll be burnt out and of no use.

So you DO need assistant instructors

In my school, 50% of them are "black belts" who have been with me for YEARS. The other 50% are also pretty advanced people (mostly fighters)

But in some cases, you have to realize that those people may not exist in a realitively new school. So you get what you can.

How did you manage it when you were first starting up? Did you teach and informal group for several years before you opened a school or did you just get a bunch of capital together and jump right in from the get-go? If it's the former, any clues on how you made the transition would be great. If it's the latter, how did you manage the early years when you had no black belts under you?

Serious question.

[HumbleWCGuy]

1. Your training is only about you so stop worrying about other people.
2. The scrubs that you want to shape up are paying the bills at your training facility.
3. If you want to train people the, "right way," open a garage school and charge a nominal fee.
4. Really think about what matters to you and your training and leave the rest alone.

[lkfmdc]

How did you manage it when you were first starting up? Did you teach and informal group for several years before you opened a school or did you just get a bunch of capital together and jump right in from the get-go? If it's the former, any clues on how you made the transition would be great. If it's the latter, how did you manage the early years when you had no black belts under you?

Serious question.

I started off teaching everyone and all the classes, I was burnt out frequently, but I am also very stubborn so I guess that helped.

It took YEARS until I got the hang of it. Again, most people burn out or drop out or go bankrupt before they do. So I have some sympathy for this

[omarthefish]

Sincere thanks for the straight answer.

[lkfmdc]

I could write pages on this subject, but let's not side track this thread too much