So basically there is kung fu in China, just don't be a weirdo in going about learning it. This thread crushed a lot of misconceptions an highlight a lot of things to avoid in seeking to learn kung fu in China. I especially want to thank Omar and Pazienzaman! You guys killed so many of the misconceptions.
I was on the metro earlier, deep in meditation, when a ruffian came over and started causing trouble. He started pushing me with his bag, steadily increasing the force until it became very annoying. When I turned to him, before I could ask him to stop, he immediately started hurling abuse like a scoundrel. I performed a basic chin na - carotid artery strike combination and sent him to sleep. The rest of my journey was very peaceful, and passersby hailed me as a hero - Warrior Man