Gwyneth Paltrow Thinks You Need $60 Sex Dust
BY LAUREN CARUSO, SENIOR DIGITAL EDITOR, JANUARY 22, 2015, 5:35:00 PM
Today in Things Gwyneth Paltrow Thinks You Really, Really Need (TM): Sex Dust. $60 Sex Dust, no less. The woman who is downright obsessed with chopped salad (her words, not ours) is going crazy over a brand called Moon Juice. GP featured a four-ounce jar of the stuff on Goop this week and was nice enough to supply her readers with a recipe for Sex Bark(!), so you’re not just pouring it down your throat all willy-nilly.
In the brand’s words, the purpose of Sex Dust, an “aphrodisiac warming potion,” is to help “send waves of blood to all the right places.” It’s made from an herbal tonic called he shou wu, which Google says helps delay graying hair and knee replacements. Gwynnie promises that it’ll promote “enjoyable sex and fertility for both men and women.” Oh, and it’s low-glycemic, just like its cousin Spirit Dust. Thank goodness.
According to the Goopster, "The spirit dust feeds harmony and extrasensory perception through pineal gland de-calcification and activation, while the hemp seeds feed the brain, nourish the eyes, stimulate blood cells, and beautify hair and skin." Just in case you’re feeling extra ****ed off from the long line at Dean & Deluca. Just kidding. There’s never a line at Dean & Deluca.
All jokes aside, the woman always looks like she just emerged from a cashmere cocoon made by a thousand gluten-free hummingbirds, so maybe she’s onto something.
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