Taijiquan Student,
In answer to your questions, I speak only a little, and my accent is a bit off. I find English monotone to be much easier than multitone Chinese. Is that the problem you have as well? My Taiji teacher is Erle Montaigue, and I practice both the old and new Yang styles of Taiji as well as the Wudang system he teaches. I also practice Chiang style Bagua. So anyway, I guess I speak just enough Chinese. But when it comes to writing, I much prefer English.

But no, I would not say that simply because someone sent the person flying he had some skill. I know people who have never trained in a martial art who can do that with ease. Many people are under the impression that fa-jing (which I understand many here are tired of hearing about) will send someone flying, but it does not. Sure, it will move them a bit, but not great distances, as fa-jing affects the inner workings more than the external frame. If you hit the right spot, the person will simply crumple to the ground, not even moving back.

I have seen some Taiji people demonstrating push hands, for instance, and they yield so greatly that they bend over backwards or let their arm come very close to their chest. Both are wrong, and the way to fix it is to use a little muscle, but just enough to accomplish the goal and no more. (And when I talk about the muscles, I am not talking about the arm muscles.) On the other end of the scale are people who practice push hands and they are practically wrestling they use so much muscle. That's wrong as well.

If you were totally relaxed, you would fall to the floor. If you want to stand, your leg muscles must work a bit. If you want to lift your arm, your arm muscles must work a bit. For self defense, they must work a bit more, but some people are too soft here and do not use enough. You see, Taiji is not a "soft" art, as there is really no such thing. It is loose. You cannot be soft and defend yourself, but you can be loose and defend yourself. These people who are too soft remind me of gelatin, not iron wrapped in cotton.

What I mean by "harder" is more yang in nature. They need to raise more yang energy. They need to be more aggressive, more animal like. I guess this is something else I'd have to show you.

Bamboo Leaf,
I prefer to think of sung as looseness and not relaxation, because of the reason above. But yes, I am sung doing what I'm doing, by any definition. But you're right, it is difficult to write about the internal.