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Thread: Martial Arts & Religion

  1. #541
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    Quote Originally Posted by David Jamieson View Post
    well he's been missing for quite a while. someone should call the cops...
    Ninja.....
    Psalms 144:1
    Praise be my Lord my Rock,
    He trains my hands for war, my fingers for battle !

  2. #542
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lucas View Post
    i was thinking of a funny movie someone should make.

    call it 'the second coming' and its a comedy about the second coming of christ but its his wacky adventure of initially getting commited and stuck in the 'system' and the trials of modern day to clear his name and prove his legitimacy.

    so you heard it here first if that movie comes out they stole it off KFM

    maybe starring will ferrell? he would be a kick ass funny jesus
    According to some, the second coming already happened. (I can think of two claims to this in regards to the Abrahamic religions)
    According to some, the first coming has not yet occurred.
    According to some, god isn't necessary and serves no purpose in reality.

    I personally think that in context to religion and religious practices, we live in VERY interesting times.

    so, there is some comedy gold there for sure.

    But it's been said that using blasphemy to entertain is like a comedian using a fart joke to get a laugh. It's been done and it's pretty lame. So, it would have to be something really funny and not just half witted rips like that Bill Maher turkey. lol
    Kung Fu is good for you.

  3. #543
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    Never mind Jesus...

    ...let's get a taste of Muslim fu, from our previous contributor Antonio Graceffo even!

    If you don't remember Antonio, check in with our threads: The Monk from Brooklyn & Antonio Graceffo articles.

    Movements Through Prayer: Malaysian Martial Arts
    Feature Antonio Graceffo Sep 14, 2010 | 1:58 PM

    Practicing Kalam softens your kindness toward human beings.

    Guru Mazlan Man stood in a neutral stance, hands at his side, feet side by side, a natural and relaxed stance, which is the starting point of all Silat Kalam movements.

    I threw a punch at his face. He blocked my punching arm, knocking it skyward. Next, he drove his knee into the tendons at the back of my knee joint. He was only going at quarter-speed, but the pain was incredible.

    After 50 years of martial art practice, the Guru was perfect. In every movement, I could feel his bones cutting through my flesh and digging into my nerves.

    He placed his shin bone against the back of my knee and leaned forward; I had no choice but to fall down, on one knee. Next, he stomped down hard on my calf muscle which was flat on the ground. Then he backhanded me in the face, and I fell backward. My body was completely locked.

    My own natural skeletal structure had betrayed me. The only way I could stand back up was if the Guru removed his foot from my calf muscle and then reached a hand down, to help me stand.

    This was Silat Kalam, an art designed to completely subdue an attacker, but never to be used as an attack. Guru Mazlan Man described the art, Silat kalam is a martial art where you never use a lot of force or movement, and each movement is based on the position of the prayers, the position of where you pray to God.

    I breathe because of God. I drink because of God. I eat because of God. I practice Silat because of God, he concluded. This is a portion of the mantra which Guru Mazlan Man has his students recite daily. He explained his philosophy this way. We must remember that we only do things because of God. And if we only do things because of God, we will not do bad things. You cannot say, I steal because of God.

    In the West, when people hear the word Guru, they associate it with some Hindu philosophy or new-age religion but in Malaysia, the word Guru simply means teacher or master. And it is the name applied to all martial arts teachers.

    Every day, students meet in the community meeting room of a government building in Kuala Lumpur. The lead student, Fami, called us to attention, Kalam sedia! The students immediately bring their hands up to prayer position and begin reciting their devotions.

    They give thanks for their health and strength and for the opportunity to practice this martial art. Then they remind themselves that they practice this martial art because of God.

    Silat Kalam, essentially a grappling art is comprised of 28 buah, sets of choreographed movements, preceded by a brief warm-up and stretching session.

    Because the art is strictly for defense, each of the buah begins with an opponent’s attack. You block, using one of four basic blocks, and then throw and lock the opponent, using one or more of several locking motions.

    The locks put the opponent on the ground, tied up like a pretzel. At the least, the opponent has submitted but a slight twist or variation in the throw or lock could severely cripple or even kill the opponent.

    Unlike submissions in other arts, the locks in Silat Kalam are completely impossible to break out of.

    The Guru told me, If a man walks into your school and challenges you to a fight, don’t accept him as a student. A man like that has something to prove, or he isn’t a good person. If you accept him as a student, remember that when he throws and locks you, you will be completely helpless, He said Underlining his statement, when the Guru, more than 60 years old, has me in a lock I am truly incapacitated, completely unable to escape, and as he says, totally helpless.

    The first non-Muslim ever permitted to study Silat Kalam, I was greatly honored to join in this incredible cultural experience. Each day, I met the Guru for training and also for lessons about the religion. He never asked me to convert, only to learn.

    He told me. We are all children of Adam, children of God. God made us all different so we can learn from each other and love one another. He does not want us to fight or quarrel among ourselves. If you were a father, would you want your children to kill one another?

    When I reminded him that I am Catholic, not Muslim, he said. When I teach you, I only talk about God. When we talk about God, everyone is happy; it is only when we talk about religion that people get angry.

    The first 11 buah are based on Dua (supplication prayers), the first prayer position, where the hands come up with the palms facing the sky. This is the first movement of more than one third of the buah.

    It is fitting that Dua play so prominently in an art which asks you to remember Who gave you your strength and your health. A man strikes you; you block by bringing your hands up in prayer position, knocking his elbow straight up.

    Each block is followed by a strike. Since you have knocked his arm skyward, the rib cage and underarm are vulnerable. You can move in with a knee or elbow strike, or a simple punch.

    The palm of your hand makes contact with his elbow, so after you strike him you can grab the elbow and pull in whatever direction you want him to go. The Guru would often grab the elbow, pull the man towards him and then deliver a karate chop to the man’s forearm.

    When I was on the receiving end, I was amazed at how painful that chop was. Just as in Brazilian jujitsu where you may strike a man simply to distract him and then go for submission, the same is true in Silat Kalam.

    When you karate-chop a man’s arm it hurts intensely, only for a split-second, so that chop is not a fight-ending technique but during that split-second of intense pain, the man loses his will to struggle.

    You chop his arm, and immediately go for the throw or the lock. In one of the buah, you chop the arm, knocking it toward the ground. Then you simultaneously grab the elbow or upper arm and continue to pull the man to the ground and step on his hand. You release that arm and lock his other arm. Now, he is completely helpless and in incredible pain. For the full series, simply lean forward with your knee against his elbow, breaking his arm.

    In some forms of Silat I have seen, once you have the man where you want him, you go nuts with overkill and devastating force. Picture this buah: the man’s hand is under your foot, you have just broken his arm with your knee. You control his other arm, place your knee on the back of his neck and drive his face into the ground. His other arm is now in an unnatural and vulnerable position, so you break it. Then you finish with any number of locks, grapples, kicks and punches.

    And that is just one of the buah.

    As violent and potentially lethal as the art is, it is still strictly defensive, as all buah begin with a man attacking you, not the reverse.

    The movement of Kalam is art, says the Guru. You will never attack anyone. Practicing Kalam softens your kindness toward human beings. There is no more quarrel. And that is how God teaches us to be all of the time. So, Silat Kalam takes the position to teach people to know each other, love each other, and to learn self defense.

    Guru believes that people are basically good; we should never hate another person for his actions because, Our enemy is not people, says the Guru, our enemy is Satan. Satan always wants to attack us, wants to kill us, setting us to fight each other, so we must live peacefully. And when we have self-defense, no one can attack us, nobody can harm us, and we will always be a friend to everybody.
    Gene Ching
    Publisher www.KungFuMagazine.com
    Author of Shaolin Trips
    Support our forum by getting your gear at MartialArtSmart

  4. #544
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lucas View Post
    i was thinking of a funny movie someone should make.

    call it 'the second coming' and its a comedy about the second coming of christ but its his wacky adventure of initially getting commited and stuck in the 'system' and the trials of modern day to clear his name and prove his legitimacy.

    so you heard it here first if that movie comes out they stole it off KFM

    maybe starring will ferrell? he would be a kick ass funny jesus
    I'd say either will ferrell, james caviezel or christian bale as jesus.

  5. #545
    Quote Originally Posted by Lucas View Post
    i was thinking of a funny movie someone should make.

    call it 'the second coming' and its a comedy about the second coming of christ but its his wacky adventure of initially getting commited and stuck in the 'system' and the trials of modern day to clear his name and prove his legitimacy.

    so you heard it here first if that movie comes out they stole it off KFM
    Too late: Kung Fu Jesus

  6. #546
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    lol kungfu jesus kicks ass
    For whoso comes amongst many shall one day find that no one man is by so far the mightiest of all.

  7. #547
    i heard the templars had some good styles they practiced as sport when they werent praying and fighting... probably some sort of pankration... worrior monks sounds so weird when associating it with christians...

  8. #548
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    I'd put money on a Teutonic knight over a Templar any day.
    "It is the peculiar quality of a fool to perceive the faults of others and to forget his own." -Cicero

  9. #549
    Quote Originally Posted by Xiao3 Meng4 View Post
    I'd put money on a Teutonic knight over a Templar any day.
    gigantors!!!!

    Barbarosa fell off his horse and drowned in two feet of water because he couldnt get up, armor was too heavy... lucky break for richard and philip, took the **** out of conrads sails and gave the power back to the roman fold... if the teutons were so bad they wouldnt have slunk back into their forest after their "holy roman emporer" died on the road... they mos def used to hand the gauls their asses on a regular basis, but once the celtae and belgaes military tactics and strategies were romanized, the teutons werent so bad ass no more... they were just big tough and brave to the point of being stupid sometimes... an army of martyrs...

  10. #550
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    Left Crucified Hand...Left Descending Cross..Pray to the Lord

    He most honors my style who learns under it to destroy the teacher. -- Walt Whitman

    Quote Originally Posted by David Jamieson View Post
    As a mod, I don't have to explain myself to you.

  11. #551
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    what the fu ck was that? sounded like he was in a tunnel the whole time. Was that a form? or just some dumba$$ thinking outloud?
    Originally posted by Bawang
    i had an old taichi lady talk smack behind my back. i mean comon man, come on. if it was 200 years ago,, mebbe i wouldve smacked her and took all her monehs.
    Originally posted by Bawang
    i am manly and strong. do not insult me cracker.

  12. #552
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    hurrrr...durrrr..derp!! lol.

    priceless!
    Kung Fu is good for you.

  13. #553
    wack on, wack off, repeat
    Chan Tai San Book at https://www.createspace.com/4891253

    Quote Originally Posted by taai gihk yahn View Post
    well, like LKFMDC - he's a genuine Kung Fu Hero™
    Quote Originally Posted by Taixuquan99 View Post
    As much as I get annoyed when it gets derailed by the array of strange angry people that hover around him like moths, his good posts are some of my favorites.
    Quote Originally Posted by Kellen Bassette View Post
    I think he goes into a cave to meditate and recharge his chi...and bite the heads off of bats, of course....

  14. #554
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    I was gonna say ass burgers but he's not adept enough.
    Kung Fu is good for you.

  15. #555
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    They've got a great spear set.

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