PDA

View Full Version : What we need more of



Budokan
03-18-2002, 05:06 PM
We need more....

1. Well-written man/ape sex stories.

2. Decent dojos/kwoons that won't fleece the novice and sour his outlook on MA

3. Hammers

4. Decent weapons instructors

5. Decent judges at MA tournaments

6. Believable man/ape sex stories, with illustrations

7. Teletubbies who know martial arts and use their skills to attack, devastate, skin and then devour Barney the dinosaur

8. Martial arts oriented television

9. Education of the public about what martial arts can and CAN'T do

10. Reality when it comes to MA and less myth

What else might we need, in your opinion...?

jon
03-18-2002, 05:13 PM
1. More posts by budokan.
2. More posts by cody.
3. More trolls they keep us entertained and thinking.
4. More realism.
5. Bimbos - god luv em.
6. Someone to publicly fight Richard Mooney.
7. My girlfriend to stop playing wierd games
8 My girlfriend to play more wierd games.
9. funny posts.
10. Ralek :(

More darn girls on the board, ive got enough Yang energy for a whole football team i dont need anymore :(
Bring on the females posters i say, there all lurkers im betting.

tri2bmt
03-18-2002, 05:15 PM
11. More ape-human sex
12. More televised martial arts
13. Better kung fu movies without that sh itty jet li bloody wushu strings and wires crapl
14. Martial artists that are actually martial artists and not athelets or wannabes.
15. More T n' A.

joedoe
03-18-2002, 05:16 PM
1) More man/ape sex stories

2) More sex stories in general

3) Actually, more sex in general

4) Less argument over how realistic UFC/Pride/NHB is and how it disadvantages one group or another - if you want to compete, then compete if you don't then why argue? Ooops, this is not a more of. Oh well.

5) More MA-based cartoons so we can fantasize over what we might be able to do if we trained real hard :)

Chang Style Novice
03-18-2002, 05:36 PM
Attorney Generals aspiring to be lounge singers. (http://www.cnn.com/video/us/2002/02/25/ashcroft.sings.wbtv.med.html)

Specially for Budokan.

Serpent
03-18-2002, 06:19 PM
Compassion

Tolerance

Benevolence

Time

Nature

Music

Topless waitresses/waiters (hey, I'm an equalitist! <-- Did I just make up a word!?)

Natural foods

Government support for education and health (this applies to all countries I've ever been to and, believe me, I get around!)

Oh, and man/ape sex, of course.

(Budokan, do you have a special ape at the moment or are you on the prowl for a fresh, young chimp? Cos I hear Pres Bush is into playing around and he's the world's most famous chimp right now! And, as far as I'm concerned, he really should get fu(ked!)

Cody
03-18-2002, 06:40 PM
1. Education of public that in order to learn a complex physical skill, you need to start from a foundation, part of which is still and moving stance training. If that isn't entertaining enough, maybe they should be doing something else. Frankly, I don't think it would be a problem.

2. More concentration on applications of justice thru and around the law. A fictional Japanese TV show some years back featured a judge who sought justice and the best for All concerned, not merely law enforcement. Was like a glimmer of hope amongst all the b*llsh*t and grandstanding.

3. Realization that the mind can go further than the body, but the body's energy can follow it. There are tricksters, but also the genuine. Separate the ego from the art in any case. Out of the ordinary doesn't mean impossible.

5. On whatever level one is, responsibility for what one does and says and thinks.

6. Movies with less special effects and more genuine technique. The film editing makes it so you can't see much of anything. Likelihood there isn't much of anything to see.

7. More posts about how we are functioning as human beings. I think there's a lot to be learned from them, and it's nice to get to know how a person feels. Interesting to read the answers too.

8. Humor is appreciated.

9. I'm bashful, so I'll tolerate the ape stuff, but not read it.

Thanks jon, I like your posts too.

Cody

Serpent
03-18-2002, 06:53 PM
Originally posted by Cody

9. I'm bashful, so I'll tolerate the ape stuff, but not read it.



Hey look! More tolerance! My list is coming true already. Kinda like how the rest of the world tolerates Chimpy Bush. The again, that's not really by choice... :(

What we need more of:

Love

Laughter

Happiness

And man/ape sex stuff!

;)

Ryu
03-18-2002, 06:59 PM
Whoever posted that he wanted more girls to post on the forum...

That won't happen as long as the "sex, T&A" stuff keeps finding its way to the top priorities of male posters.

If you want change you've got to be prepared to make some changes. :)

Ryu

joedoe
03-18-2002, 06:59 PM
And it has been mentioned before, but we need more of people to take responsibility for their own actions. Too many people find someone to blame hence the litigious society many of us live in, and the attitude that <insert the name of a governing body here> should do more to ensure <insert some stupid cause that has arisen because of someones stupidity>. More responsibility, less blame.

Also need more people to realise that while they have rights, they also have responsibilities.

jon
03-18-2002, 07:06 PM
Ryu
How is that most of the girls i know are much more sexist than me, with the possible exception of my current girl who im seriously doubting to be human at all. She is simply way to moraly correct.

At one of my old jobs i was the only male staff member for ages, after the girls got used to me they begun to let fly. Ive never heard guys talk about things in anything like the detail they did!
I know more about female sanitary and sex issues than i EVER needed to or wanted to!

I dont think many females post here, as a lot of guys do what has happened to Wushu chick and simply perform like seals whenever she is around. Contry to popular belief not every girl likes to be the centre of attension.

Serpent
03-18-2002, 07:08 PM
Well said Joe!

And as for you, Ryu, and your super chivalrous, new age, sensitive guy stuff.... you're quite right! BUT, have you ever heard a bunch of girls on their own when they think that there's no guys listening? They cuss and rant and talk about the most outrageous Bangkok monkey-sex far more than most guys do! It's all an act and they'd love a bunch of topless buff guys in the cafe as much as we'd like to see more hooters! Don't fall for it!

What we need more of?

Honesty from the chicks!

(D@mn, I'm walking on thin ice here!)

:D

Serpent
03-18-2002, 07:10 PM
Hmm. Jon posted while I was typing and it seems he shares my views! So if you're going to bash me you gotta bash Jon too!

;)

Zapf Dingbat
03-18-2002, 07:12 PM
I definitely agree about the movies! I'm a HUGE kung fu movie fan, and it sickens me that all people in the US know about the genre is The Matrix, Crouching Tiger, and Kung Pow. The Matrix, while a good movie, is still not the real thing. I show my friends the Matrix and then get out my huge ass collection and say, "Ok, now these guys will make Keanu look like a *****!"

Wires: I have nothing against wires! They're entertaining if used correctly, and not to excess! One of my all time favs is Iron Monkey.... heavy on the wires and the skill!

I should shout this through a loudspeaker in the middle of Hollywood, right outside big film studios: AMERICANS CAN'T FILM ACTION ANYMORE. Go back to film school, asswipes! Learn how to hold a ****ing camera still, and don't cut and edit like it's a new invention!! Moderation! We like to see what the hell is going on! This goes for any action, not just MA fights!

Phew. I think I blew off enough steam for one night.

jon
03-18-2002, 07:12 PM
Serpent
"They cuss and rant and talk about the most outrageous Bangkok monkey-sex far more than most guys do!"
* Scary but VERY true...
Ive sat there and tried to remain stable whilst girls discussed shaving of pubic hair, anal sex, men with extremly large endowments and how to cope with it, why most guys are hopeless at oral, coughing on pubic hair, sex when its that time of the month.
Im scared for life thanks to those girls:(

Serpent
03-18-2002, 07:25 PM
D@mn straight!

All this cr@p about not wanting to hear men talk like we do, not liking the swearing, not liking the thought that men like to look at naked women, etc. It's all just further backlash.

There was a time when women were oppressed, badly. No one is denying that. Now times are changing and equal rights is becoming more and more of a reality all the time.

However, a lot of women out there are just as guilty now of crimes against men as men were against women before. It's a backlash making us all suffer for the sins of the fathers. Don't buy into it!

How many ads are there on tv where the women make the men look stupid, or slap them on the but, or objectify them sexually? No ads on the tv with women in those roles any more. It was wrong, it was demeaning. So why is it ok to do it to guys now?

What do we need more of?

Less hypocrisy from women to go along with more honesty!

;)

joedoe
03-18-2002, 07:29 PM
Originally posted by Zapf Dingbat
AMERICANS CAN'T FILM ACTION ANYMORE. Go back to film school, asswipes! Learn how to hold a ****ing camera still, and don't cut and edit like it's a new invention!! Moderation! We like to see what the hell is going on! This goes for any action, not just MA fights!



Actually, some might argue that Americans never could film a fight scene :)

I remember someone once telling me that there is an unwritten rule in American film making - a fight scene should never last more than 2 minutes. To me this sucks. If you are going to film a fight scene, make it a decent one.

At least it seems that HK fight choreographers are now being called in to do more of the Hollywood fight scenes. They are starting to get better. :)

Sharky
03-18-2002, 07:32 PM
we need more compassion.

ewallace
03-18-2002, 07:33 PM
I can tell you what we need less of:

1. Pus*ies. It seems everyone is offended by everything these days. If I happen to call a flight attendant a 'stew' and wish I could pat her on the fanny, so be it. If they don't like it, Don't Take The F*ckin job. What ever happend to sticks 'n' stones?

2. I could use less beer. Apparently I have had too much tonight.

3. T.V. shows that tell you how to be stylish. People are so trendy these days that individuality and originality barely exist. If you want to wear pink-flowered spandex bell-bottoms with see-thru crotch because you think that it could save your life in a streetfight then fuuck what you just saw on Entertainment Tonight. Wear the flamming pants.

4. I will continue with this list after I eat my chicken wings that just got out of the oven.

5. See #2.

Serpent
03-18-2002, 07:37 PM
Originally posted by Sharky
we need more compassion.

Hey! That's the first thing I said in my first post on this thread!

Right Sharky, expect a call from my lawyer! That's plagiarism that is!

Like your style though!

;)

Sharky
03-18-2002, 07:37 PM
I hate trendy people. I hate them. I hate them all.

Budokan
03-18-2002, 07:42 PM
Laughing at ewallace!:D

Taking responsibility for ones actions is a big one for me. Part of it is how I was raised and saw my idiot brother ruin his life through poor lifestyle choices, part of it was teaching high school for seven years.

Tonight on the news (CBS) I saw a story where a guy was killed in his vehicle when he hit a pole head on and the vehicle folded up like an accordian, smashing him into pulp jelly. His family is suing the car manufacturer for making a shoddy product.

Sounds fairly normal...until you realize the guy was DRUNKER THAN A HOOT OWL and SPEEDING DOWN THE HIGHWAY in less than desirable driving conditions, as noted in the news piece.

The way I see it, he made his choices like a dumba$$, he deserves to reap his reward.

I can't stand stupid people. Ignorance is okay. Ignorant people can be educated. Stupid is forever.

Ryu
03-18-2002, 07:44 PM
Unfortunately a lot of girls grow up in the same kind of pop culture/ environment that a lot of guys do, and have the same kinds of values. I've never been the one to say all women are shinning examples of morality and intelligence. That's rubbish.
But people are on different levels so you find good ones and dumb ones. That goes for both genders.
There's nothing wrong with talking about sex (I do so with women a lot) but it depends on your attitude of it.
Doesn't really matter anyway, if people want to do what they want to do let them. Just don't complain if it backfires. Take responsibility for the way you behave and think.
*shrugs*

I'm busy lifting weights tonight anyway so I don't have much time to care. A lot of girls I know don't like crudeness. Some do. It all just depends on what you want to find.
Tonight is not the best night for me to talk about this anyway. :D
So later...

Jon, if you have gotten a girl who makes you happy and has both intelligence and some good values on her, KEEP HER!
Treat her like a queen. I'm sure you do.

Take care,
Ryu

Serpent
03-18-2002, 07:45 PM
Iagree with Budokan and Sharky in their two most recent posts.

Seems like no one is prepared to take responsibility any more. And trendy people suck!

Serpent
03-18-2002, 07:48 PM
Originally posted by Ryu

Jon, if you have gotten a girl who makes you happy and has both intelligence and some good values on her, KEEP HER!
Treat her like a queen. I'm sure you do.



What? Pretend she's a man, dress her in sequins and get her to do really cheesy stage acts singing Barbara Streisand hits in gay bars?

;)

Sorry, I'm very bored at the moment!

Zapf Dingbat
03-18-2002, 07:48 PM
Originally posted by joedoe


Actually, some might argue that Americans never could film a fight scene :)

I remember someone once telling me that there is an unwritten rule in American film making - a fight scene should never last more than 2 minutes. To me this sucks. If you are going to film a fight scene, make it a decent one.

At least it seems that HK fight choreographers are now being called in to do more of the Hollywood fight scenes. They are starting to get better. :)

I meant action in general... note the "Not just MA fights" part.....

prana
03-18-2002, 07:52 PM
more repetitions of the 6 syllables , hehehe :)

Serpent
03-18-2002, 07:54 PM
Originally posted by prana
more repetitions of the 6 syllables , hehehe :)

More reps of the what now? :confused:

ewallace
03-18-2002, 07:54 PM
Daamn that was good. Okay, on with the list. This portion is on-topic of what we need More of:


6. Midgets in CMA. Everyone and their mother's cousin/uncle makes fun of midgets. I want to know how these little fuukers operate. They are bound to go on a rampage soon. I want inside information.

7. Realism with children. When I was little I was taught that this world was happy-happy everyone loves you. Years later I found myself wondering what the fuuk were those silly-ass people talking about. The world is not a nice place. I am tolerant of every color skin/hair/skin-growths. If you are different/confused/angry, come my way and I will try my best to help you. I don't judge people. That is for God to do. I do however make fun of everyone including my own out-of-shape...getting in-to-shape chicken wing-eatin fat ass. If my comments offend someone, it's simple...don't fuuckin read them. If a T.V. show offends you, don't fuukin watch it.

Budo brought up an outstanding point. People do not take any responsibility anymore. If you bungee-jump from a bridge over a rock quarry with a luggage cord and it breaks, your family need not sue the maker. It was your dumb-ass who jumped with it in the first place. Death of a loved one is a terrible thing but making others suffer from someone elses stupidity is not a valid way to cope.

8. I'm done ranting for now, see #2 in previous post.

Budokan
03-18-2002, 07:55 PM
ROFLMAO @ Serpent!:D

Hey, Jon, treat her like a FLAMING queen. She'll appreciate it and always remember you.;)

Budokan
03-18-2002, 07:58 PM
:D :D :D


Oh...my...God...ewallace!! I just busted a fuggin' rib laughing over #6 about the midgets!---:D

Serpent
03-18-2002, 08:00 PM
D@mn EWallace, I could really use a beer and some fried chicken about now!

There's something we need more of! Beer and chicken!

Ryu
03-18-2002, 08:03 PM
Know what we need more of?

Killing. That's the 11th commandment.

Ryu

Serpent
03-18-2002, 08:09 PM
I agree Ryu. There should be stupidity tests and those considered stupid (not ignorant) should be killed.

Maybe that's how we could deal with this litigious society. Whenever anybody sues somebody else or a company, etc., there should be two trials. Firstly, a dozen people should decide if the plaintiff's claim is just plain stupid (like in that car crash that Budokan cited earlier). If it's not stupid it goes ahead to court. If it is considered stupid then the plaintiff is killed. Violently and painfully.

That should ease the burden of litigation and make people think twice before suing everybody for their own idiocy.

Yeah, we need more of that!

And Ewallace, you got me hurtin' with your midget concerns! :D

ewallace
03-18-2002, 08:13 PM
Okay, here's more. I am not usually this direct buy my wife has been in Cali since Thursday and I am expecting her back in the next hour. I've been a little heavy with the 'happy cans' tonight because the last week has really sucked for me.

9. Women who can kick ass. I am tired of hearing about some pu*sy assed man killing his family because he finally figured out that life sometimes sucks. Yeah well, vacuum cleaners suck too. Get used to it.

10. Hot lesbians. There is just nothing better than two hot chicks going at it.

11. Change in assult laws. Some people just need a good ole fashion ass whoopin to get 'em thinking straight again. I thoroughly believe that if my pops gave me a few more straight rights that I would be much more respectful to figures of authority.

12. Daamn, I am getting dizzy again. More later. See #2 two posts above.

Ryu
03-18-2002, 08:14 PM
Now you're talking.

But there should be one ruler to watch over the stupidity trials just to make sure the people judging stupidity aren't stupid themselves. If that's the case they should be killed also.

If any other countries object to this they are also to be killed.
Then the ruler should take on all comers and kill kill kill his way to victory. All women should be killed including little children. They should be killed too. Anyone who works for entertainment of film will be disected while alive THEN killed. Then, all men should be killed as well, ESPECIALLY American men. But all countries' men should die too.
Then finally after all this, the ruler should be victorious and seat himself atop the hightest, most exalted, tremendous, most honorable pedestal and throne! And shoot himself in the fu(king head...

Sleep tight everyone.

Ryu

Serpent
03-18-2002, 08:15 PM
Hey ewallace. Your wife is coming home after a few days away and you have to get tanked in anticipation? That's the kind of respect for women that I'm talking about! ;)

ewallace
03-18-2002, 08:17 PM
Hey ewallace. Your wife is coming home after a few days away and you have to get tanked in anticipation? That's the kind of respect for women that I'm talking about!
It's all about balance brother. Yin-Yang. I missed the sheit out of her and would like to let her know how I really feel. Gotta balance that out by getting tah-diddley so I don't act like too much of a boychik. :)

Serpent
03-18-2002, 08:17 PM
Wow! Go Ryu!

Yeeeehaaa! We finally got through the skin of chivalry and found the real Ryu. See, everyone's a b@stard underneath. I like this Ryu much better.

So Ryu, how about you and me start the killing and I'll meet you on top of that mountain and we can fight it out for the final glory? I'll bring the gun, you bring the bullets. Once we've gone mano a mano, the victor gets to shoot himself!

This is a great thread! ;

Serpent
03-18-2002, 08:18 PM
Originally posted by ewallace

It's all about balance brother. Yin-Yang. I missed the sheit out of her and would like to let her know how I really feel. Gotta balance that out by getting tah-diddley so I don't act like too much of a boychik. :)

LOL! Classic!

:D

Ryu
03-18-2002, 08:23 PM
Well knowing me the first time I see any man, woman, or child suffer under our reign, I'd have to stop you and shoot you for the good of humanity. Even though humanity might not even like me for it.

Sorry, Serpent. Guess some guys are good underneath whether they like it or not. :)

Last post,
I really don't need to be online right now. Wasting time.

Ryu

Serpent
03-18-2002, 08:32 PM
Ryu, of course you're wasting time. That's what we're all doing here! ;)

As for your last post, I see a small paradox. If it were indeed our reign, that would require you to also kill, therefore, you'd have to kill yourself. Being good underneath and all that.

Therefore, you wouldn't be alive to kill me.

Therefore, I'd be top dog in no time!

What do we need more of?

Me in charge, that's what!

:D

ewallace
03-18-2002, 08:33 PM
mmmmmm...chicken wings.

joedoe
03-18-2002, 08:36 PM
How's the man/ape sex thing going?

Serpent
03-18-2002, 08:54 PM
I reckon I could still hook you up with Chimpy Bush....

joedoe
03-18-2002, 09:40 PM
Does Chimpy Bush like playing with bananas? :D

jon
03-19-2002, 12:59 AM
Ryu
* I treat her however she wishes ;)

lol even my sifu saw her last night and litteraly jumped up in the air before exclaiming " wow soooo pretty, you are looling amazing" she was, girl in a short blackl dress - great thing :D
Then turns to me and says "you very lucky".
Im going to shut up about her now before i start to sound like how ewallace might discribe a 'boychick' :)

ewallace
* I live your style, you have my vote :)
You should post more often to, which brings me to my next subject :)

Serpent
You should post more as well, your a funny man and you think outside of the ordinary spectrum, whatever the hell that means :rolleyes:


We need more threads like this!

Sharky
03-19-2002, 01:10 AM
Ryu needs a release.

vingtsunstudent
03-19-2002, 01:36 AM
i love women
esp. naked & on one knee.
and i'm never sexist when i want sex.
do any of you guys think it is sexist or wrong of me to think that all fat ugly girls should be made do tae bo & facial surgery til' someone gets it right ?
is it not fair of me to think that hey if shes gonna suck it she should enjoy the mouthful at the end?
vts
ps sorry if i started to sound like a 'boychick' at the end there, you know all that sharing & pure love.

wushu chik
03-19-2002, 01:39 AM
#1...Labotamised Men.

#2...Hot Asian Men that look like Russell Wong and Jet Li.

#3...More men like Ryu

#4...Killing of Stupid People

#5...See #2

#6...See #1

#7...Faster cars with more straight roads

#8...See #2

#9...Smarter Women that don't take this SH!T from men

#10..See #2

There's my list. I don't mind sexist remarks guys...just understand that if I do see you in person, I look forward to ramming them down you throat!!! ;)

~Wen~

vingtsunstudent
03-19-2002, 01:39 AM
oh i forgot
*we need more beer & chicken
vts

Kristoffer
03-19-2002, 06:23 AM
b1tches and pie...
b1tches and pie is what we need.

ewallace
03-19-2002, 07:05 AM
Anyone have any Tylenol?

Budokan
03-19-2002, 07:27 AM
"is it not fair of me to think that hey if shes gonna suck it she should enjoy the mouthful at the end?"

LOL!
:D

By the way, I'm still doing research on the man/ape sex thing. I keep wanting to drive but my ape won't let me. What does that say about my ape, and about me...?:eek:

[Oh, it's a female ape, but she uses a strap-on--ribbed for my pleasure.]

JWTAYLOR
03-19-2002, 07:39 AM
I need Jon's girlfriend to stop playing games. That b!tch is crazy!

JWT

ewallace
03-19-2002, 07:46 AM
#7...Faster cars with more straight roads
But didn't you say you just got a Honda? :)

Sorry, I had to take that cheap shot.

Now that I am a little more...clearheaded, I will continue with what we need more of.

14. Chiks like wushu and Jas. Btw, where has Jas been lately?

15. Alligators. Nothing more humbling than a 1000lb pair of boots chasing you with the intent of trying to swallow your ass.

16. Firearms Training. Teach gang-bangers how to fuukin shoot straight so they kill each other off instead of a 6 year old girl asleep in bed. Either that or give them all guns and drop their asses off in the Grand Canyon and let them go at it.

17. Chick-fil-a's. If I ever get rich I am having one built in my house. For those of you who have never experienced this fine cuisine, CFA is a fast-food restaraunt that is actually pretty decent health wise and their chicken samiches are outstanding.

18. Rednecks and Trailer Parks. I'll be piissed if COPS (aka: Redneck Roundup) goes off the air. Plus if you really want to test your martial skills it isn't hard to get action there. Something to the effect of "I think I got your sister pregnant" will usually do the trick.

More later.

Budokan
03-19-2002, 01:58 PM
I'm certain rednecks have heard "I've got your sister/mother/dog pregnant" so often they don't even react anymore.

Now, if you said something like: "I drank your last beer and pi$$ed on your Rebel flag" then those would be fighting words.

Tigerstyle
03-19-2002, 02:29 PM
ROFL @ Kristoffer!


ewallace + beer = Some of the funniest posts I have ever read! :)


I think we need less Hong Kong action in US films. That's what Hong Kong action films are for. Keanu Reaves flipping through the air just doesn't have the same impact as Chow Yun Fat demonstrating the grace of "Gun Fu". We need musketeers flying on wires about as much as we need more arm-wrestling movies.

I need more bad American action films! I want to see muscle-bound foreigners with accents so thick that they need subtitles, but still don't have them!

I need to hear puns so bad that you cringe in pain! (ex. Throwing a phone booth on top of a guy and then saying, "It's for you.").

It's just not American action until the villain dies three times (two times, minimum), the last death leaving absolutely no chance of a sequel (unless the box office draw is big). The bad guy should fall from a 30-story building (shooting his gun on the way down, of course), land on an electrifed spike at the bottom and explode!

The movies should be so cheesy, they get constantly re-run on TBS Superstation weekly.


(Tigerstyle takes all the people that are trying to cash in on HK action in American films, puts them all on a missle and says, "You're fired." before launching them all to their electrified, heavily FX-driven, explosive end)