View Full Version : What?! The worst ever...

Mr Punch
05-24-2002, 06:36 AM
martial arts movie:

Jim Kelly: Black Samurai.

OK, I know it's gonna be loaded with a name like that, but PUH-LEASE!

It's gotta be the worst!

Whatever the opposite of continuity error is: it has a complete absence of them from start to finish!

In one scene the two protagonists fight very badly without opening their mouths... which is dubbed with at least four different voices! And it's all in English in the first place.

Anyone reckon they can top this sucker?

OH :eek:



Now, I just don't know whether it's bad enough to buy...:rolleyes:

05-24-2002, 02:01 PM
How about "Shaolin Dolemite"?

Or maybe "The Next Karate Kid"?

"Killer Meteors"?

I'm sure I can find even worse...

05-26-2002, 07:42 PM
pretty much any ma film with "ninja" in the title

05-26-2002, 08:36 PM
some of the stuff in the Wu Tang collection is really total ****. Some of it is great (Shaolin and Wutang 2: Wu tang invasion aka holy robe of Shaolin for example) I just saw one called snake lama fist or something that was total ****.

Chang Style Novice
06-01-2002, 09:38 PM
Golden Sun was about the lamest thing I've seen recently.

The plot involves a Bruce Lee fan who can't believe the official story of his death, and so embarks on a misison to find out what really happened. The guy is supposed to look so much like Bruce other characters think they see a ghost, but only bears the vaguest resemblance. In other flashback and 'mysterious vision' scenes we see the allegedly 'real' Bruce Lee, who looks even less like that guy in Enter the Dragon and Fists of Fury. The 'real' Bruce Lee also has a death scene that's one of the funniest pieces of physical comedy I've ever seen, except I think it's supposed to be dramatic and terrifying.

There are a few good moves, though, so I suppose it wasn't a total waste of time.

06-02-2002, 03:17 AM
chang was this a 80s western production?, i remember a movie from when i was like 9 or ten? the kid studys with bruces ghost, isit it?.
Tommorow Man, Buddys getting his Burner!...

Chang Style Novice
06-02-2002, 06:52 AM
Diego -

Good news! I'm looking forward to your mixes.

Anyway, here's the imdb listing for Golden Sun. I suspect you might be thinking of "The Last Dragon" which is silly in a fun way, not like Golden Sun which is crappy in a stupid way. But yeah, they have basically the same plot. One's American, the other HK.

Golden Sun (http://us.imdb.com/Title?0087347)

The Last Dragon (http://us.imdb.com/Title?0089461)

06-02-2002, 09:23 PM
The world is full of bad movies, and bad martial arts movies are a special breed. Some of the bad ones are so "bad" they're fun to watch. Ones I would put in this category include:

Enter Three Dragons (hilariously bad).
Bruce Lee Strikes Back from the Grave (filmed in LA).
Ninja Turf.
Yellow-Faced Tiger (Slaughter in San Francisco, with Wang Tao and Chuck Norris).
Soul Brothers of Kung Fu.
Sun Dragon (filmed in Taiwan and Arizona, good fight scenes).
Kung Fu Executioner).
The Master Strikes (awesome martial arts but bad plot).

Bad martial arts movies are pure hell to sit through. Some in that category include:

Bruce Lee: His last days, his last nights.
Bruce Lee: We miss you.
North Shaolin Vs. South Shaolin (filmed in Korea with Casanova Wong).
Anything starring Bruce Le.
Anything with Carter Wong as the main star.
Snake Shadow Lama Fist.
Shaolin Vs. Ninja (starring Alexander Lo Rei. THe badly-done English dubbing alone ruins it).

Relating to the last point, not all English dubbing is equal. SOme of the old-school dubbers really knew how to 'act' and fit the characters. But some movies used a dubbing crew that really sounded mentally challenged. Check out Shaolin Vs. Ninja as an example. Do not confuse this film with Shaolin Challenges Ninja, which is an excellent Gordon Liu film.