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Thread: My spiritual journey in combat sports

  1. #1

    My spiritual journey in combat sports

    Hello everyone, I was gone ten years and here is what happened to me. Let me tell u of my magical journey and high adventure

    College years

    There was this Cambodian dude in university of guelph that recruited only ladies to his taichi class so he can feel their skin in push hands. Forgot his name. I was like bro let me in on this he was like naw man only room on mountain for one king

    Another time at Guelph I met this very serious tough looking brother on open mat day josh schroeder. He taught me some bjj fundamentals. I’m in his guard his wee wee get hard. He said sorry bro i said no problem bro we finish this no matter what we are WARRIORS. His manly grunts turn midway into soft moans like a woman. Minutes felt like hours. My friend osman told me he might be shapeshifting demon, like blue will smith. I was 18 and very scare. I stop bjj for ten years.

    Fast forward to Edge mma gym on colfax. part time coach rico big muscle black brother ,we do the roll and he ask me in locker “Do u want some of this bro” slap his buttcheeks. I was like motherpuker r u for real, this ain’t cheeseman park. In my head of course. In real life I shake my head quickly leave locker. It was awkward and he stopped coming to the gym.

    Saekson Janjira was in San Francisco teaching for Samats seminar since mr payakaroon likes to smoke for two hours in a three hour seminar. So saekson teaching the seminar, he catch a red hair lady’s kick and explains technique, while lovingly caressing the leg for about two minutes. Saekson looked very satisfied like a hungry orphan eating kfc. To be fair that leg did look very nice, smooth shiny and white like a giant catfish flopping out of the river. His happy face remind me of when he won his lumpini title belt. The hipsters were nervously laughing but I was very happy for him slowly nodding with a big smile thinking, that’s it my lonely Thai brother rub that leg u earned it.

    My favorite memory has to be clinching with this blonde lady Sarah and she rub her sweaty forehead to me face to face and get arouse. She smelled like the finest cheddar cheese. We went on a date and I took her to movie on campus. But I was nice gentleman and she go away bored and banged like three dudes in one week. I cried and hugged my buddies osman and Ravi I was so close.

    Fast forward 2017 I balloon to 210 pounds bald with mongol mustache and went on dry spell. Nobody want to rassle with me except hairy 250 pound guy name bijan. He was azeri from kazak. He has bushy eyebrows big bloodshot eyeballs and big beard. One day he says, brother, only I understand you. We follow the way of the mongol. When we wrestle he would growl like a tiger, and when he driving his car he sometimes randomly growl like a tiger. And also when he eat meat growl like a tiger. He was normal guy had a wife and kid. finally I get to wrestle and train normally with a normal human being and began to learn and grow and was so happy.

    I guess the moral is if ur a very handsurm (but a little fat) gentleman who respec women they will want to wrestle with u all the time and get arouse but this not good. U must become big hairy angry man so they stop bothering u. Follow the way of the mongol. I hope this has helped u my dear reader.

    Ps. Never take free bjj lessons because it might be a shapeshifting demon like blue will Smith.
    Last edited by bawang; 08-10-2019 at 09:51 PM.

    25th generation inner door disciple of Chen Style Practical Wombat Method
    Officially certified by Ethiopian Orthodox patriarch Abune Mathias
    grandmaster instructor of Wombat Combat™®LLC Practical Wombat Method. international academy retreat

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2003
    Location
    Australia
    Posts
    768
    Cast not pearls before swine!

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Dec 1969
    Location
    Canada!
    Posts
    23,101
    Crikey Jim, that's a cracking story of unrequited love on the bjj mat then isn't it. LOL

    Let's just stick to dim sum and chatting about Kum Na shall we?
    Kung Fu is good for you.

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