Today is Valentines Day. It's also Ash Wednesday. And for the Lunar New Year, it's the fifth day, the day we welcome the God of Wealth and Fortune. In China, Lunar New Year (a.k.a. Spring Festival) goes on for several days with unique ritual observances for each day. Today is a day to dedicate to hard work (to bring good fortune), house cleaning (to dispell poor luck) and setting off firecrackers (to scare away poor luck and to blow stuff up like we do on Lunar New Years). 

This Year of the Dragon is special for me personally. I was born under the sign of the Dragon and this marks my completion of the Cycle of Sixty. There are twelve celestial animals in the Chinese zodiac – Rat, Ox, Tiger, Rabbit, Dragon, Snake, Horse, Sheep, Monkey, Rooster, Dog, and Pig – in that order. This is multiplied by the five elements - Wood, Fire, Earth, Metal, and Water. Twelve times five equals sixty. For believers in Chinese astrology, completion of the Cycle of Sixty is a monumental achievement. Perhaps it’s because it’s highly unlikely that anyone might live to complete a second cycle.

So yeah. For me, this is sixty.

Kung Fu Horoscopes

I’m not a firm believer in astrology, despite having been one of the key creators behind our Kung Fu Horoscopes. I’ve been part of thisfor every print issue since its inception in December 2000 until Kung Fu Tai Chi died of Covid in 2020, and now just annually for Chinese New Year here on KungFuMagazine.com.

I attribute my astrological skepticism to Carl Sagan. His groundbreaking show COSMOS was broadcast when I was in High School and had a tremendous impact upon my generation. In one segment of that show, he compared newspaper predictions and found no correlation between astrologers. He also logically deduced the issue of twins, who don’t necessarily share the same fate despite being born on the same date. At the time, he said “There are ten times more astrologers in the United States than astronomers.“ I wonder if that’s still true, or if it has gotten worse. But who am I to say, given that I helped write horoscopes for twenty years (and I’m no astronomer)?

Nevertheless, we went totally legit for our Kung Fu Horoscopes in terms of Feng Shui. We hada resident Feng Shui Master on staff. How many magazines have their own Feng Shui Master? Master Wilson Sun has worked with me andour publisher emeritus Gigi Oh since the turn of the millennium. Gigi is a firm believer in Feng Shui and supported Master Sun’s efforts in the U.S. She proposed that he have a regular column, but it took a year for us to settle into the horoscopes.

It was awkward at first because it was hard to convince our readership that Feng Shui should be included in a martial arts magazine, despite our deep cultural roots.Some of the early attempts didn’t work out so well. Master Sun literally wrote about Kung Fu crystals. That was even a two-part article: Crystal Qi-Feng Shui Power Healing for SEP 2000). Keep in mind that in 2000, MMA was on the rise. MMA brought a lot of attention to ‘reality’ fighting, and honestly, would crystals work in the cage?

However, in the beginning, we also created a 4-part series that I was extremely proud of - Feng Shui for Kungfu Schools. That ran consecutively from March to June in 2000. It looked at the proper Feng Shui arrangement for a Chinese martial arts school based upon which of the cardinal directions the front door faced. After that, we struggled to find a suitable topic. After the crystals pieces drew some negative feedback, we discussed all sorts of ideas until we finally hit upon Kung Fu Horoscopes. That served as the perfect end page for each issue, and I’m very proud to say that this was the first horoscope based on Chinese astrology to be published in an English-language newsstand magazine.

It also helped us build KungFuMagazine.com. In the early days of the web, ‘horoscopes’ was a hot search word, SEO as we say nowadays, so including them in KungFuMagazine.com was a powerful attractant. That changed long ago as things always do online, but we developed a good rhythm, working with Wilson, publishing in print and again online. And despite my astrological skepticism, he did make some uncanny predictions. I grew to respect his craft, despite my disbelief.

Master Sun only speaks Mandarin, so Gigi and I served as translators. I delighted in those translation sessions. Gigi is well versed in Chinese culture, and Master Sun often made obscure cultural references, mostly in the form of chengyu (成语). Chengyu are idioms, typically written in four Chinese characters, and Chinese is a highly idiomatic language. One of my favorite chengyu is ma ma hu hu (马马虎虎) which literally means ‘horse horse tiger tiger.’ As an idiomatic phrase, it means ‘mediocre.’ According to one legend, this chengyu originated when a mediocre artist set out to paint a tiger, but could only paint horses, so he tried to substitute that. When translated literally, a chengyu is nonsense. But when Gigi and I worked on these, I learned so much about Chinese culture. And since Kung Fu is the fruit of Chinese culture, it can be a chengyu too, in so many ways.

Some of Master Sun’s predictions were very difficult to translate but I reveled in this ambiguity. Horoscopes are ambiguous by nature. It forces the reader to put themselves into the forecast to bridge whatever nebulous statement is put forth. In this way, it reminds me of the Rorschach inkblot test. It capitalizes on the psychological effect of pareidolia, the tendency for humans to impose a meaningful interpretation on an ambiguous stimulus, so that you see an object, pattern, or meaning where there is none. If you understand how this phenomenon works, you can manipulate it to convince people of the veracity of your forecasts. It’s correlation, not conclusive, but it works. I studied the writing of other astrologers, and the best ones are masters at this style of writing, to the level of poety.

And sometimes, Master Sun’s predictions were just a bummer. Sometimes he made predictions like ‘you’ll have diarrhea during this period.’ Keep in mind, the period was a whole month. Many western astrologers make predictions that are more positive and hopeful. Master Sun’s predictions were often grim. But that is the nature of Chinese Feng Shui horoscopes. There’s yin and yang, always.

To read Master Sun’s 2024 predictions, see Kung Fu Horoscopes. Gigi was enjoying a cruise to Mexico when these came in, so this year her sister, Joan Chien of Tiger Claw, did the translation.

The Year of the Dragon for Dragons

People often get excited when it’s their year thinking that it’ll be lucky for them, but Chinese astrology propounds exactly the opposite. In fact, it’s one way to tell if your ‘Chinese’ astrologer is authentic. If you’re a dragon and they say you’ll be lucky this year, they’re just making it up. Despite what you might think, the year of your birth sign is unlucky. It’s a fundamental principle of Chinese astrology. Your birth year, which happens every 12^th year of your life, is called Ben Ming Nian (本命年). This literally means ‘root fate year’ but is more commonly translated as ‘the twelve-year curse.’ During your Ben Ming Nian, you are likely to be confronted by obstacles and have poor luck.

This is due to the stars – more specifically the star gods. Tai Sui (太岁) is not only a star, it’s a planet. It’s the ancient Chinese name for Jupiter. In ancient China, the stars were deified, and there’s a Tai Sui for every years in the Cycle of Sixty. Superstition has it that during your Ben Ming Nian, it’s easy to encounter the Tai Sui for that year. And the Tai Sui oversees fortunes but encounters with them seldom go well.

Consequently, Master Sun advises a lot of caution for us Dragons this year. He warns of reoccurring old and fresh high impact contact sport injuries, which sucks for my Kung Fu practice. He warns about driving when tired and I do a lot of late-night driving after working at concerts and music festivals. Reduce alcohol intake? This year looks like such a bummer.

Despite my Sagan-evolved skepticism, I’ve seen Master Sun make some fiercely accurate predictions. When I was publishing the print magazine, I got like Kurt Vonnegut’s Billy Pilgrim – ‘unstuck in time.’ We were working on issues months ahead and I was awash with deadlines, so sometimes I wouldn’t get to look at Master Sun’s predictions in retrospect. I remember once blowing out my shoulder at practice. And then the next day, I read Master’s Sun’s prediction for that month. It said to protect my shoulders. I had a month plus lead on that one if I had bothered to take his advice.

Within our office, these sorts of after-the-fact realizations happened regularly. Master Sun had so many of these that it bordered on uncanny, even for skeptical me. It’s pretty trippy working with him. He taught me a lot about writing forecasts, and peripherally, a lot about Feng Shui. I’m delighted he is still working for us.  

Master Sun gives us Dragons some sound advice for dealing with our Ben Ming Nian. I can always be more cautious at practice and at driving, as well asexercise increased moderation. For Kung Fu, I’ve been gradually shifting more towards my neijia (internal family 內家) practice anyway, which is what you do at my age. With my Shaolin practice, a lot of weapons have disappeared from my practical arsenal. I can still do a broom sweep, but it takes a few minutes to warm up beforehand. I can’t do it cold anymore, so I only practice them for health, not self-defense.  While I still recite my external forms, I’m getting more out of my Xingyi, Baji, and of course, my Tai Chi. They are all making more sense to me now.

Now that I’m turning sixty, it’s more about prudence, so none of Master Sun’s predictions are to be ignored. It’s all good advice.

The Elemental Animals

My first Chinese New Year article for KungFuMagazine.com was a two-part story for the last Year of the Dragon. I wrote YEAR OF THE DRAGON 2012: She Takes Her Fan and Throws it in the Lion's Den and YEAR OF THE DRAGON 2012: The Bees Made Honey in the Lion's Head with a circular structure so you can start with either one. It was one of my earlier experiments in internet writing to weave a few stories together that I had been wanting to share for years.

I skipped the Year of the Snake and the Year of the Horse, then picked up again with the Year of the Ram 2015 (or Goat or Sheep or Ewe). I skipped the Year of the Monkey that following year. It was after that when I hit on my Chinese New Year blogging theme – the elemental-animals – beginning with 2017 Year of the Flaming Cock.

Honestly, who can resist a flaming cock? That title still amuses me. Our most popular Zodiac T-shirt was our 2005 Year of the Cock (read that Flaming Cock article to learn why). I confess I’m still giggling like a naughty schoolboy over that one.

I’ve been writing these elemental-animal themed zodiac blogs every year since. I hope to cover all twelve zodiac signs. Now I’ve looped around to my very first one, but to stay true to the theme, this Woody Dragon story had to be fresh. I’ve just got four more to go: the Snake, then Horse, then Ram (again), then Monkey.

Will I make it? Time will tell.

Thank you for your continued support of KungFuMagazine.com.

Happy New Year!

恭喜發財!

Gung Hei Faat Choi!

Gōngxǐfācái!

Congratulations! May you be Prosperous!